Star Wars Griefing Thread (SPOILERS) - Safety off

[Michael Jacks0n]

Let’s play a game! Tell me who has the shittest acting and charisma. Daisy Ridley as Rey Rey in the What If Trilogy or Andrew Gray as the Red Ranger in Power Rangers: Megaforce.

Yeah, her acting in Star Wars blows chunks. I don't think she's suited to be an action hero in any capacity. If she never did Star Wars and instead just became some generic English actress for literally anything else, she'd be tolerable. I think the problem is that being a main hero in the Star Wars franchise requires some pretty big shoes to fill. Come on, she's supposed to be on the same level as Mark Hamill, Harrison Ford, Carrie Fisher, and fucking Alec Guinness of all people. Daisy can't even compare to any of those aforementioned actors, and Rey doesn't have the same charm as their characters. You can say the same with Kylo Ren vs. Darth Vader: one is a whiny emo kid, and the other is quite possibly the greatest movie villain of all time.

Rey isn't a believable action hero. Would still smash.

 

[King Dead]

Not just the "movie" (calling it a movie is wrong since it's a bunch of scenes slapped together with no consideration of how they fit) but the title crawl and credits too. The title crawl probably because it contradicts itself or some other Disney bullshit (I was drunk when I watched Plan IX so I don't remember what it was) and the credits because I'm sure Disney cheated or mislabeled some actor or film crew somehow. It wouldn't surprise me given how much of a clusterfuck production was.

The fact that anyone worked on these movies in any capacity is a sin.

 

[Xerxes IX]

Has anyone ever brought up a twitter page called " Shitty Star Wars Takes" (@SW_takes) on this thread before. These exceptional individuals are right up our alley.
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Its a gimmick account made by some mad nerd and a tranny dedicated to screenshot-ing any take that is negative of their uwu space adventure franchise or its recent Far left influences
(heres a few)
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If you hadn't guessed this account likes to use the G+G guy as their punching bag
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Him sperging at people sperging about the new female series

Upon further inspection the account is co-owned, one is some irrelevant nerd but the other... well lets just say viewing their twitter page answers al LOT of questions
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The jokes write themselves.
Did I forget to mention Quinton Reviews follows SW takes? I wonder why

I know this post is old and I'm late and gay but seeing the hammer and sickle on a pro Disney Wars image is giving me an aneurysm.

Here's some helpful advice, you are not "subverting a multibillion dollar company" by doing this shit. You are shilling for them and proving to Disney that queer anticapitalists have no principles and are just another demographic they can milk money out of. If Disney Wars has any politics it's the dumb woke neolib shit that causes people to unironically tweet that it's shameful that North Korea is getting its first female leader before the US.

 

[Exceptionally Exceptional]

Hey, I know this is the 3020s and all but I'm still not comfortable with you taking our women.

Then again it is Rey so i don't feel like fighting that hard for her...

Hey, the moment they figure out how to make real women with vaginas that can suck, stroke, and vibrate at the same time I'll leave your whorebots alone. Until then bite my squishy mostly protein ass!

 

[ZMOT]

I think the problem is that being a main hero in the Star Wars franchise requires some pretty big shoes to fill. Come on, she's supposed to be on the same level as Mark Hamill, Harrison Ford, Carrie Fisher, and fucking Alec Guinness of all people. Daisy can't even compare to any of those aforementioned actors, and Rey doesn't have the same charm as their characters. You can say the same with Kylo Ren vs. Darth Vader: one is a whiny emo kid, and the other is quite possibly the greatest movie villain of all time.

eh, mark hamill was whining half of ANH how he wanted to go to tosche station.
point is no one watches star wars for the world class acting. having a shit story with god-awful writing just makes it that much more obvious. rey has exactly one outfit with one character state (angry-surprised or surprised-angry, take your pick), any of the old guard would look utterly boring in the same situation. and even going bra-less doesn't help her like the first time we see leia. you also can't blame her for not having the balls to tell jarjar (and in effect kennedy) to shove the shit writing and adlib it.
all they had to do for kylo was have him keep the mask on for the first movie (especially since it makes zero fucking difference if he wears it or not, it's literally just for effect), heck if jarjar would as be clever as he thinks he is he could've shown him without it and not telling the audience it's kylo for a "twist".

Meh, it looks like the guy has lost his mojo. It's not as funny as it used to be.

happened years ago when videos were suddenly 20 minutes long for that ad money (hollywood got worse, but not that much that early) and half the "sins" where on the level of "look, a talking panda".

 

[Emperor Julian]

EDIT2: Her Twitter bio says "chaotic-neutral jedi-sith breed."
Don't throw in D&D terminology in Star Wars! It should have been Grey Jedi, or if you really wanna impress, say you're the Sith'ari,
come to unite the light and dark.

Or you know, describe yourself instead of just regurgitating a load of pop-culture shit.

I suppose I should be grateful her fucking pronouns and political ideology isnt there.

 

[Starscreams Cape]

>Implying that Daisy Ridley has that kind of cleavage game going on underneath that Scavenger Outfit

Seriously, the woman is flat enough to double as a dejarik board, which is impressive considering she's following Portman as the female lead.

When I was growing up those were said to be "two fried eggs on a sidewalk".

#BoomerHumor

I'm a robosexual...

I thought @Flexo was our resident robosexual?

I kid, I kid!

 

[Flexo]

I thought @Flexo was our resident robosexual?

I kid, I kid!

When you look this good you make robosexuals every day...

 

[Miller]

>Implying that Daisy Ridley has that kind of cleavage game going on underneath that Scavenger Outfit

Seriously, the woman is flat enough to double as a dejarik board, which is impressive considering she's following Portman as the female lead.

Also if she's a poor scavanger, she should look like she stinks and have hairy armpits and pusy, instead she's always wearing the same clean white dress.

 

[RomanesEuntDomus]

When you look this good you make robosexuals every day...

I mean, who could resist the stylish goatee?
No robo

 

[Kosher Dill]

Also if she's a poor scavanger, she should look like she stinks

Well, that's Hollywood for you. Aladdin wasn't very flea-bitten and toothless for a so-called "street rat" either.

 

[Michael Jacks0n]

Well, that's Hollywood for you. Aladdin wasn't very flea-bitten and toothless for a so-called "street rat" either.

And worst of all, he had no fucking nipples!

 

[Mr. 0]

And worst of all, he had no fucking nipples!

he obviously ate them to avoid starving to death

 

[Jub-Jub]

Apparently Kennedy was behind the outcome of GE.

Didn't we have earlier confirmation that Iger was behind GE stupidity? If they are pushing that onto KK then Disney must be really sick of her, given that Iger is known to be out soon.

 

[Puddleduck]

I think an all-female Star Wars series could work - here's my pitch!

The Vengeful Valkyries are a collection of (very attractive) women who lost their men to the wars. The Valkyries' partners were from both the Empire and Rebellion, so as a group they want to kill as many combatants as possible. Each episodes focuses on them killing a general (or whatever) who was responsible for the battle which killed their man! It would alternate between killing a Rebel and Imperial target.

 

[Adamska]

Didn't we have earlier confirmation that Iger was behind GE stupidity? If they are pushing that onto KK then Disney must be really sick of her, given that Iger is known to be out soon.

I wouldn't be shocked if this was also retaliation for going behind Legal and PR's back to get Harvey Weinstein's assistant to make a shitty propaganda piece for herself only.

I think an all-female Star Wars series could work - here's my pitch!

The Vengeful Valkyries are a collection of (very attractive) women who lost their men to the wars. The Valkyries' partners were from both the Empire and Rebellion, so as a group they want to kill as many combatants as possible. Each episodes focuses on them killing a general (or whatever) who was responsible for the battle which killed their man! It would alternate between killing a Rebel and Imperial target.

Nah, still don't like the pitch that much.

 

[Puddleduck]

Nah, still don't like the pitch that much.

Fair enough

 

[Michael Jacks0n]

The only all-female Star Wars I would ever approve would be a lesbian porno.

 

[madethistocomment]

A guy on twitter by the name of @StevenWayneArt redesigned some of the characters from High Republic to look way more interesting and twitter's getting on his ass for "SeXuALiZaTiOn" because of course they are.

Spoiler: Art

He said he took inspiration from Frank Frazetta and 80's and 90's Star Wars comics. Gotta say, I find these designs way more visually interesting than the canon ones. (Not to mention that he gave them skin tones that don't look sickly, which cannot be said for the original.) These characters look like ones you'd have fun watching, whether it be exploring a new planet, navigating Coruscant's seedy underworld, or fighting Sith.

 

[ASoulMan]

A guy on twitter by the name of @StevenWayneArt redesigned some of the characters from High Republic to look way more interesting and twitter's getting on his ass for "SeXuALiZaTiOn" because of course they are.

Spoiler: Art

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He said he took inspiration from Frank Frazetta and 80's and 90's Star Wars comics. Gotta say, I find these designs are way more visually interesting than the canon ones. (Not to mention that he gave them skin tones that don't look sickly, which cannot be said for the original.) These characters look like ones you'd have fun watching, whether it be exploring a new planet, navigating Coruscant's seedy underworld, or fighting Sith.

Yes, cause how dare female characters look like actual female characters.

And that third redesign is giving me Conan vibes so hard. I can see that Frank Frazetta influence clearly. Imagine that chad fighting a whole group of Sith grunts.