Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

wenttobermuda said:
"You win women by being yourself...and if you have to become what they want you're a fucking pussy..."

Where'd Lucas get this advice?

What if you become, through your own sloth and incompetence, the opposite of what women want? What if you cant become what women want?

What if your natural self is loathsome and off putting? You could be born a soft, doughy whiner. Perhaps you've got an ugly mug and moobs, which you emphasize through poor hygiene and neglect. You stink. You're not very bright, and you're socially inept.

You might never learn to care for yourself. Maybe you have no place in the world. You're a dependent. And rotten inside. Just a cruel, angry asshole.

If you tried to change any of that, you're a pussy. Accept it without shame or self awareness, and you're Lucas.
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When people say “be yourself” they don’t mean “never try to improve”, lol.
 
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wenttobermuda said:
It does seem that Lucas is specifically addressing someone, even of he directs his soliloquies to an entire generation. He has a sort of male, and female strawman that he focuses his rants on. If we listen to him, we can describe them:

The female is a Zoomer, 16-24. She claims to support socialism, and may be a Sanders supporter, but she is impressed by cars and credit cards. She doesn't see older men as viable romantic partners, but will make exceptions if they are wealthy. She's Christian, too, but only nominally, because she's not very Christ like. Men who say "nigger" turn her on. She's likely infatuated with a wealthy guy that maintains a harem.

The male either has a grey beard or a flatbill hat. His cellphone has the numbers of 100s of baes, but he will not share them. He knows where the women are at. He hoards pussy. He's a professed socialist, Occupy sympathetic, and maybe even a Christian. He has a car and a credit card.

One theory is that Lucas's rants are for Lacie, consciously or not. You may recall her as the Zoomer thot that made the mistake of once hugging Lucas. When she spurned Lucas in favor of a flatbill guy called Da Pussy God, Lucas did not take it well. She has had a tremendous impact on his life and thought.

When Lucas angrily rants about women and flatbills, the suspicion is that he is in part returning to the agony of the Lacie saga.
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Long time lurker, first time poster. I've followed Lucas for about four years now, and this really touches on one of the things I find the most interesting about his psyche - others have commented on this in the past, but it never fails to amaze me. It's that he seems chronically haunted by (small, insignificant - to anyone else) social interactions. We all know that, because Lucas has very little in the way of "normal" socialization, a smile from a barista or a conversation with another homeless guy can stick with him for weeks to months to years.

This is why I'd tie this particular example even farther back than the Lacie saga - we know he was complaining about flatbills long before this, and he's hinted before that the focus of this particular brand of his ire is Cyril, his ex-friend and roommate in Olympia (and also his high school classmate - presumably the same Cyril that showed up in the yearbook pictures that were posted the other day).

As we know from his infamous "It Gets Better" manifesto, he was madly jealous of Cyril's ability to talk to women, maintain a relationship, and maneuver social situations while essentially sidestepping Lucas's pathetic attempts to join in and even "steal his girl" (when Cyril found out about this genius plot, he of course just...moved to a different apartment, and Lucas was left to deal with his failure. Must have been difficult for a narcissist who so wholly believes in all of his schemes, no matter how ridiculous).

While I think the Lacie crew definitely contributed to the reigniting of Lucas's obsession with flatbills, I would venture to guess that this early experience with Cyril provides the foundation for - and maybe even remains the primary focus of - this one-sided conversation he's always having. He desperately wanted to be the guy who showed Cyril up, stole his girl and his apartment, and left this "greedy flatbill" to go live in a homeless shelter. When Cyril showed any amount of human capability / common sense at all and removed himself and his girlfriend and that situation, and therefore "won", Lucas must have felt shocked, burned, and bitter. Because he was so newly out from under his mother's wing at that point, I'm sure that those early interactions with people - that is, "lessons learned" and memories made back when he was first truly vulnerable and on his own - stick with him more than the more recent stuff. Cyril is the person who "taught" him not to "trust guys", and every guy who comes after that (Lacie's bf, for example) just reinforces that lesson for Lucas.
 
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BrightGold said:
Long time lurker, first time poster. I've followed Lucas for about four years now, and this really touches on one of the things I find the most interesting about his psyche - others have commented on this in the past, but it never fails to amaze me. It's that he seems chronically haunted by (small, insignificant - to anyone else) social interactions. We all know that, because Lucas has very little in the way of "normal" socialization, a smile from a barista or a conversation with another homeless guy can stick with him for weeks to months to years.

This is why I'd tie this particular example even farther back than the Lacie saga - we know he was complaining about flatbills long before this, and he's hinted before that the focus of this particular brand of his ire is Cyril, his ex-friend and roommate in Olympia (and also his high school classmate - presumably the same Cyril that showed up in the yearbook pictures that were posted the other day).

As we know from his infamous "It Gets Better" manifesto, he was madly jealous of Cyril's ability to talk to women, maintain a relationship, and maneuver social situations while essentially sidestepping Lucas's pathetic attempts to join in and even "steal his girl" (when Cyril found out about this genius plot, he of course just...moved to a different apartment, and Lucas was left to deal with his failure. Must have been difficult for a narcissist who so wholly believes in all of his schemes, no matter how ridiculous).

While I think the Lacie crew definitely contributed to the reigniting of Lucas's obsession with flatbills, I would venture to guess that this early experience with Cyril provides the foundation for - and maybe even remains the primary focus of - this one-sided conversation he's always having. He desperately wanted to be the guy who showed Cyril up, stole his girl and his apartment, and left this "greedy flatbill" to go live in a homeless shelter. When Cyril showed any amount of human capability / common sense at all and removed himself and his girlfriend and that situation, and therefore "won", Lucas must have felt shocked, burned, and bitter. Because he was so newly out from under his mother's wing at that point, I'm sure that those early interactions with people - that is, "lessons learned" and memories made back when he was first truly vulnerable and on his own - stick with him more than the more recent stuff. Cyril is the person who "taught" him not to "trust guys", and every guy who comes after that (Lacie's bf, for example) just reinforces that lesson for Lucas.
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Interesting. I've long maintained that insignificant, incidental moments in people's lives are important events in Lucas's; what for the other party was forgettable, was for Lucas pivotal. A professional smile from a barista is endowed with romantic tension; a passing greeting on a staircase becomes the social highlight of his year. I'm glad that you mention Cyril, the chief villain of Lucas's notorious 2010 Personal Reflections, because I think he's very useful for "understanding" Lucas's behavior--inasmuch as we can understand an un-medicated schizo.

Cyril seems to be Lucas's archetype of the pussy hoarding male rival, and likely informed Lucas's reaction to the dreaded Da Pussy God. When Lucas directs rants at men in general, he is speaking to Cyrus. It appears, however, that Lacie surpasses Michelle in Lucas's tortured imagination.

By way of background, Lucas moved in with Cyril and Michelle in the 90s as a sort of third wheel/roommate after failing to graduate from high school. It was Lucas's entry to adult life, his first time away from his mother's teat, and it did not end well. Soon, Lucas would beg his family to "come home." Shortly after he would be involuntarily hospitalized for the first time.

Cyril was the oldest of the three, and had the best paying job. Lucas admits to be intensely jealous of Cyril's income. Moreover, Lucas was outraged that he had to pair an equal portion of the bills. He intuitively felt that because Cyril made more money, Cyril ought to pay more of the bills. Lucas hated paying his bills.

He afforded a better life. All my money went to him. My "rent" supported his lavishness while I had very little food or any fun stuff. I couldn't save any money. I didn't have anything left over from my meager paychecks after paying him. Sometimes I went days without anything to eat. He didn't seem to care as long as he was happy. His greed showed me what a selfish person he really was. He still acts like he's better than I am. How was I supposed to improve my station in life? I worked minimum wage. He had a better job. He didn't care. It was his world. I was just living in it...

...He has never understood my money woes. He could have easily picked up the tab for Michelle with his higher paying job...
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Lucas was even more jealous of Cyril's social aptitude. Cyril, rather than being some debonair player, was just an average guy.

Anyway, one of Lucas's more amusing reoccurring themes is that other men should "hook him up" with baes or give him phone numbers. Other men know where the women are at, and how to reach them; they must share. We can trace this strange demand to Cyril. Lucas believed that Cyril had the secret to getting a girl friend:

I did my best to pay attention to what he was saying because he seemed so cool and confident to me at the time. I thought by watching his lead he could help me meet women. He had girlfriends and these neat things I had never seen before. But that's all they really were to me. Things. Collectibles.... I kept hanging around with him because I thought maybe he would help me talk to girls. Maybe he would let me in on his secret and I would become popular with the ladies by watching him.
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In fact, echoing Lucas's later demands of his sex, Cyril was obligated to provide Lucas a girl friend:

I used to always hope Cyril would have introduced me to all girls he has been friends with. But he never has gone out of his way like that for me or has once taken a chance to help me out, even though he knows plenty of women. He's never hooked me up is what I'm saying. I always thought this was a strange thing for him not to have ever done. Then it dawned on me. Aside from Justin, the others - Bryan Keogh, Patrick O'Connor, myself, all his "little buddies" have had trouble meeting women and talking to women. Cyril has side-kicked his "buddies" so he could look more charming because we were so shy. I know he has talked behind Bryan's back and Patrick's back and told people they were gay when they weren't, just so they would never get a chance to meet his women friends and steal his potential fallback partners. I always thought it was fishy that we never have gone out bar hopping together and he's had girlfriends. How many people has he run this game on? Is it just us? Or has it been every younger male friend he has ever lured in and established a trust with? This seems more likely to me. Cyril established a trust some of us thought was iron clad. A trust Cyril has abandoned time and time again.
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This quote from Lucas is quite revealing. Lucas believes that Cyril's social success is attributable to tearing down other men. To the extent that Lucas seeks reproductive success by emulating Cyrus, this may explain some of his later behaviors. Lucas also assumes that all the women Cyril knows are "potential fall back partners," and that Cyril is deliberately keeping them to himself because he expects other men to "steal" them. Lucas takes for granted that men try to steal other men's girl friends. We are left with the impression that Lucas considers all women to be potential sexual partners, and that other men do to, and that all men struggle to limit their rival's access to women. Perhaps this was because Lucas was trying to steal Michelle from Cyrus:

I remember Michelle coming home before Cyril and we both just needed to take our minds off work and hang out. We played games, visited. It was cool for a little while. But then Cyril started getting jealous...

I think he felt like I was becoming too close to Michelle. We were all friends. I wasn't going to try anything. But he appeared jealous for some reason. I never so much as made eye contact with Michelle at some points because that was Cyril's girl and he was my friend and I didn't want him to feel jealous anymore or think I was going to hit on his girl...

...I liked Michelle at one point. She was nice to me at one time...
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Recall that Lucas has put the world on notice that if you have a girl friend, Lucas can and will steal her; and you will not be allowed to speak to his.

As I already noted, Lucas attributed Cyril's success with the ladies to his habit of mistreating Lucas and other "younger guys":

Thanks Cyril. I want you to know that you're the fakest friend I've ever had. You're a pussy assed bitch. You're insecure. You use younger guys to get women into bed with you. This makes you the biggest tool on the planet as far as I'm concerned.
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Lucas also engaged in a bit of projection:

Cyril is insecure and hates competition to the extent that he will befriend younger guys with the express purpose of talking shit behind their backs so he looks like the hero.
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It's established that Lucas cannot abide a woman he is interested in (presumably all female from 16-24, or perhaps 11-24) talking to another man at all.

In sum, Cyril left a lasting impression on Lucas; more than a decade after they parted ways, Lucas was still publicly nursing his grievances against his pussy hoarding, fake friend. The complaints that Lucas once made of Cyril he now makes of men generally.

@BrightGold, you noted that Lucas attempted to steal Cyril's girl friend and his apartment, and Cyril outwitted him simply by moving out. You're confusing anecdotes, I believe. It wasn't Cyril that defeated Lucas's ridiculous ploy by moving out, but rather Jason Perva, the same flatbill that Lucas is alleged to have performed oral sex on. I believe that Lucas largely conflated Cyril and Jason in his own mind. All his rivals are, to some extent, Cyril. That mean all men are. I am Cyril; you are Cyril.

Michelle, for her part, is important to the story of Lucas inasmuch as she was a female, and something that Lucas saw himself as contesting with Cyril. Lucas's sexual obsession with Lacie, a troll thot that hugged him once, is well documented in this thread. Compared to Lacey, Michelle has played an insignificant role in Lucas's madness.
 
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wenttobermuda said:
Interesting. I've long maintained that insignificant, incidental moments in people's lives are important events in Lucas's; what for the other party was forgettable, was for Lucas pivotal. A professional smile from a barista is endowed with romantic tension; a passing greeting on a staircase becomes the social highlight of his year. I'm glad that you mention Cyril, the chief villain of Lucas's notorious 2010 Personal Reflections, because I think he's very useful for "understanding" Lucas's behavior--inasmuch as we can understand an un-medicated schizo.

Cyril seems to be Lucas's archetype of the pussy hoarding male rival, and likely informed Lucas's reaction to the dreaded Da Pussy God. When Lucas directs rants at men in general, he is speaking to Cyrus. It appears, however, that Lacie surpasses Michelle in Lucas's tortured imagination.

By way of background, Lucas moved in with Cyril and Michelle in the 90s as a sort of third wheel/roommate after failing to graduate from high school. It was Lucas's entry to adult life, his first time away from his mother's teat, and it did not end well. Soon, Lucas would beg his family to "come home." Shortly after he would be involuntarily hospitalized for the first time.

Cyril was the oldest of the three, and had the best paying job. Lucas admits to be intensely jealous of Cyril's income. Moreover, Lucas was outraged that he had to pair an equal portion of the bills. He intuitively felt that because Cyril made more money, Cyril ought to pay more of the bills. Lucas hated paying his bills.



Lucas was even more jealous of Cyril's social aptitude. Cyril, rather than being some debonair player, was just an average guy.

Anyway, one of Lucas's more amusing reoccurring themes is that other men should "hook him up" with baes or give him phone numbers. Other men know where the women are at, and how to reach them; they must share. We can trace this strange demand to Cyril. Lucas believed that Cyril had the secret to getting a girl friend:



In fact, echoing Lucas's later demands of his sex, Cyril was obligated to provide Lucas a girl friend:



This quote from Lucas is quite revealing. Lucas believes that Cyril's social success is attributable to tearing down other men. To the extent that Lucas seeks reproductive success by emulating Cyrus, this may explain some of his later behaviors. Lucas also assumes that all the women Cyril knows are "potential fall back partners," and that Cyril is deliberately keeping them to himself because he expects other men to "steal" them. Lucas takes for granted that men try to steal other men's girl friends. We are left with the impression that Lucas considers all women to be potential sexual partners, and that other men do to, and that all men struggle to limit their rival's access to women. Perhaps this was because Lucas was trying to steal Michelle from Cyrus:



Recall that Lucas has put the world on notice that if you have a girl friend, Lucas can and will steal her; and you will not be allowed to speak to his.

As I already noted, Lucas attributed Cyril's success with the ladies to his habit of mistreating Lucas and other "younger guys":



Lucas also engaged in a bit of projection:



It's established that Lucas cannot abide a woman he is interested in (presumably all female from 16-24, or perhaps 11-24) talking to another man at all.

In sum, Cyril left a lasting impression on Lucas; more than a decade after they parted ways, Lucas was still publicly nursing his grievances against his pussy hoarding, fake friend. The complaints that Lucas once made of Cyril he now makes of men generally.

@BrightGold, you noted that Lucas attempted to steal Cyril's girl friend and his apartment, and Cyril outwitted him simply by moving out. You're confusing anecdotes, I believe. It wasn't Cyril that defeated Lucas's ridiculous ploy by moving out, but rather Jason Perva, the same flatbill that Lucas is alleged to have performed oral sex on. I believe that Lucas largely conflated Cyril and Jason in his own mind. All his rivals are, to some extent, Cyril. That mean all men are. I am Cyril; you are Cyril.

Michelle, for her part, is important to the story of Lucas inasmuch as she was a female, and something that Lucas saw himself as contesting with Cyril. Lucas's sexual obsession with Lacie, a troll thot that hugged him once, is well documented in this thread. Compared to Lacey, she's played an insignificant role in Lucas's madness.
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Yes, this is amazing - thank you for pulling those quotes and clarifying re: Jason! God, he has truly always been this sad, pathetic loser.

As has been noted in the past, Lucas seems to only operate on generalizations (Gen Z, millennials, "the women", "flatbills", etc.) because he can't parse distinctions between people / understand nuance in any context, and this is the "easiest" / only way for his brain to understand the motivations of others. This is probably also why he is dead-set on the idea of coming up with "a line" that will get "the women" to notice him - he spends a long time musing on this in the Reflections post, too. And it goes beyond just pick-up lines; he seems to believe (like a narcissist, or perhaps just as someone who doesn't realize how broken his brain really is) that everyone around him is operating under the same understanding of how socialization works, and that some have just mastered this better than others. His vision of this is, from what I can tell, that dialogue is a series of "lines" (opening lines, "cool" greetings like the "Wassup!" example he gave in Reflections) that tree off into other pre-loaded responses, which in turn result in a desired outcome (girlfriend! friendship points!), etc. He seems to believe that he just missed the part of life where people download this shit into their brains, and desperately wishes that other, more successful people would "teach" it to him - as if he is teachable. As if anyone would try.

It's so obvious that he's at least subconsciously aware of his low status as a male and that it is stressful for him. He knows he has nothing to offer re: traditional assets, so he tries to rewrite the prerequisites for love and life. He screams and rants about wanting men to "leave him alone with the women" because deep down he knows that girls will always pick them over him, as they have done his whole life; simultaneously, he begs for consult with these higher-order males who might have something to teach him - he begs them to "share", "hook [him] up" or "give him a line" to use on girls. If he were "successful", he wouldn't need anyone to "share" with him, you know? He could just take, take, take - which is something he hilariously claims he's able to do ("if you bring a girl around me, she's my girl now"), but it's so easy to call bullshit on that sort of rhetoric that it seems pointless to even mention its falseness.

I'm not sure I buy into this "ranking system" / social Darwinism shit, but Lucas's pea brain certainly does, so I think that in order to understand him as much as we can, we have to play along.
 
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Lucas's quest for the perfect line fascinates me. Lucas has a strange understanding of language and social interactions.

Have you ever played an RPG that features branching dialogue? Each conversation begins with a set of lines, or responses, which lead to others. In order to achieve your game objectives you may need to use the correct lines in the correct order.

I imagine this is analogous to how Lucas understands socialization.

Say Lucas's objective is to get a smart pretty interesting girl to share a burrito with him and then offer up her juicy womb and/or submit to asshole torture . He notices one jogging from his hiding place in the bushes. He approaches her. These are his dialogue options, all he can come up with:

A. Hello. I'm Lucas...(looks at feet)
B. Suppitchoo!
C. Let me tell you about the potential of my balls and my DNA.
D. Are you from Tennessee?

Lucas chooses A.

The bae responds: Uhh...(flees).

His next dialogue options are:

A. ....(bashful silence) (end conversation)
B. AGEPHOBE! (end conversation)

"Damn," thinks Lucas, "let me try again."

Moments later he encounters another bae. This time he chooses D.

"Are you from Tennessee?"
"Huh? What?"

His next dialogue options:

A. Because you're the only 10 I see!
B. I'm afraid nobody will ever love me like my mommy did.
C. Uhm... nothing (looks at feet)
D. Want to eat some food?

Lucas chooses A, and the bae hurriedly flees. End conversation.

Lucas curses. Foiled again. He will try again.

He wonders why he hasn't unlocked other dialogue options. Perhaps other men are preventing him from learning them? Why aren't they on his dialogue list?

Despite his frustration, Lucas keeps playing out the same handful of conversation chains on a parade of horrified baes. He knows no other way. He doesn't know this isn't normal.

He can't tailor his speech to the give and take of conversation because he's a shy, thirsty tard. He cannot learn to not be a shy, thirsty tard.

Lucas has often said that he refuses to approach women first, and it's sexist that women don't make the first move.

He does not seem to fully understand that there is nothing attractive or interesting about him that would prompt a bae to break the ice. He may suspect as much, and he has his rationalizations. He's suitable, because socialism is popular...and Bernie Sanders. He also has his attention seeking strategies.

This is where the attraction signs, board games and candy offerings come in. They allow him to advertise his many fine qualities, and suitability as a mate, without the baffling challenges of speech with another thinking creature. Once he gets that initial attention, he expects to unlock new dialogue options.

Lucas looks at language as magic; the proper order of words, in the form of a perfect line, is by itself is a sort of incantation to get what he wants.
 
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wenttobermuda said:
He wonders why he hasn't unlocked other dialogue options. Perhaps other men are preventing him from learning them? Why aren't they on his dialogue list?
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The obvious answer is because his intelligence, wisdom and charisma are all at 1 so his dialogue tree looks more like fallout 1 and 2 characters with really low intelligence. Mostly just grunts, muttering and barely understandable gibberish
 
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mothman96 said:
If the insane pedo shows up at the protest, he'll be taking video of the teens and head to the nearest toilet stall to try to masturbate.
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For all his performative bleating about his political views, one would think he'd be live on his IG and trying to claim he was leading a march because that's what the Gen Z hotties would like.
 
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Some Classic Wern for this Wernless day.

I love how, near the end, he goes on about how he's going to become a multi-millionaire because some ambulance chaser style attorney called him saying he "had a discrimination case" against Starbucks.

If I'm being honest, I would have very much enjoyed seeing the public circus that would have happened if he'd taken that lawyer up and gone to court over his right to hit on 16 year old Starbucks employees without being banned from the store.

Just imagine:

- The news coverage.

- The state having to explain how age of consent laws work like they were talking to a fucking five year old who was being represented by what I can only assume is a real world version of Lionel Hutz.

- The absolutely humiliating public loss of the court case and the news coverage of that.
 
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I can confirm that the Wern is 100% not in jail or in the hospital and still wandering downtown. Spotted him walking south on Monroe street leaving the courthouse where lots of protesters were at. We passed by each other so fast, and it was so crowded that I couldn't snap his photo. I did turn around and was almost blinded by his gigantic gleaming bald spot.

I guess 2 days of protests with everyone supporting BLM makes him not want to scream "Nigga" into his phone over and over again, or anything for that matter.
 
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Trainwreck said:
I can confirm that the Wern is 100% not in jail or in the hospital and still wandering downtown. Spotted him walking south on Monroe street leaving the courthouse where lots of protesters were at. We passed by each other so fast, and it was so crowded that I couldn't snap his photo. I did turn around and was almost blinded by his gigantic gleaming bald spot.

I guess 2 days of protests with everyone supporting BLM makes him not want to scream "Nigga" into his phone over and over again, or anything for that matter.
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Went downtown to get something to eat, and he was walking and hanging out with this meth mouth tweeker nicknamed "Slugger" near the plaza who has been kicked out of the shelters for dealing and fighting. He has a huge ugly scar on his neck like someone tried to shank him. Sooooo, I would like to see where that goes...lol.
 
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Trainwreck said:
I can confirm that the Wern is 100% not in jail or in the hospital and still wandering downtown. Spotted him walking south on Monroe street leaving the courthouse where lots of protesters were at. We passed by each other so fast, and it was so crowded that I couldn't snap his photo. I did turn around and was almost blinded by his gigantic gleaming bald spot.

I guess 2 days of protests with everyone supporting BLM makes him not want to scream "Nigga" into his phone over and over again, or anything for that matter.
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I wonder if Lucas is joining his "courageous" comrades in the protest turned riot?


 
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