Careercow Chuck Wendig / Charles Wendig / TerribleMinds - Terrible author, terrible person, ruined Internet Archive's online library

[RomanesEuntDomus]

"Herkily-Jerkily"
wtf?

If I read "herkily-jerkily" in a children's book, I'd roll my eyes. In a novel aimed at anything above the age of 7, it's simply shameful.

Scientific publishing is so fucked up that pirating from libgen should be considered a moral imperative at this point unless things change.

Oh come on, who doesn't like to pay 500 bucks for a publication from 25 years ago for the only book on a certain topic that was never reprinted.
And it is totally sensible to have dozens of online-libraries that all take an insane monthly fee and still retain a paywall for some choice articles and books - by mere chance the ones you personally need and the ones that you can't find anywhere else. It is an absolute joy to find out that the one book -the one book that explains the fundamental aspects that are covered nowhere else cause any other publication simply assumes you have already read it- that you've been looking for for months, is most cheaply available for 30 or 40 bucks behind a paywall on a library site that you already are paying subscription fees to.
You can always try interlending from a library half across the country and maybe it will get to you in less than 6 months! Usually, it arrives just in time so you can pick it up on your way home after dropping off your thesis on said topic.
*cue nervous laughter*

saw this the other day and was surprised he didn't include the phrase "herkily-jerkily":
View attachment 1379926
it's a decade old, though. wait, now it's a 404. did he (herkily-jerkily derpity-doopity) delete it because his descriptions of vadges and dongs were being (justifiably) mocked?

I halfway expect this article to end with the words "My wife told me, this is what sex is like. Given her great experience with many different men, I guess I'll have to take her word for it."

 

[Tookie]

saw this the other day and was surprised he didn't include the phrase "herkily-jerkily":
View attachment 1379926
it's a decade old, though. wait, now it's a 404. did he (herkily-jerkily derpity-doopity) delete it because his descriptions of vadges and dongs were being (justifiably) mocked?

This guy has 100% had a penis in his mouth.

 

[Elwood P. Dowd]

Can't wait to not watch this. Also, is 4:00 PM on a Wednesday kind of a weird time, or am I just missing something?

Ilze Hugo, Chuck Wendig, and Lauren Jackson | Greenlight Bookstore

archived 16 Jun 2020 10:10:53 UTC

archive.is

https://www.greenlightbookstore.com/event/ilze-hugo-chuck-wendig-and-lauren-jackson

 

[BScCollateral]

Dumb question, but has a TIE fighter ever flown "herkily-jerkily?" I thought the overall visual style was smooth movement, except when colliding with something.

 

[Meriasek]

Jeez, how can this guy be a professional writer? Who would publish this kind of awful writing? I've read my fair share of not-that-great Star Wars novels from the old EU (mostly from before the prequels came around), and while the quality of the stories was, uh, "fluctuating", the writing itself was mostly solid. Not high art, but not whatever Chuck Wendig is churning out.
Reminds me of some absolutely atrocious section from some Warhammer 40k novel. The Lost and the Damned by Guy Haley.
"Fulgrim tittered girlishly. Abaddon glared at him. Fulgrim pulled a lewd face."

 

[Calamity]

View attachment 1370155

Internet Archive Will End Its Program for Free E-Books

The nonprofit has said its National Emergency Library was a public service to people unable to access libraries during the pandemic, but publishers and authors accused it of theft.

www.nytimes.com

Sure would be a shame if everyone just started posting links to free copies of Cuck's godawful books everywhere. Not so people could read them (because no one would ever want to) but just to make him shit himself in anger.

Props to Cuck for helping to make the internet a worse place though, many cows try but few actually succeed at it.

I was hoping they would win but I understand - It has happened many times and will happen again.
I'm glad Libgen and The Eye are still around. Software/info preservation is a luxury we have nowadays and I strongly believe collective material should have a chance to be shared eventually. A lot of these books people seek so much are out of print, and you can only get them secondhand - So buying them wouldn't be giving the publishers any money, either.

It feels especially painful when it's educational ones that are restricted. Books that are stupid old will have most likely outdated info so there's not much to protect in some cases. To think of the preserved books that are gone and will be impossible to find elsewhere is a shame.

 

[ditto]

his ego was elevated so dramatically by being published that he had the fucking audacity to criticize Tolkien as if he was his peer.

And now, here comes the Witch King. It starts firing at the white tower, likely intent on burning the whole city down. He grabs both sides of Gwaihir's head "You got this?" Gwaihir says in that voice that warbles from deep to shrill "CONSIDER IT DONE, GANDALF THE WHITE"

Gwaihir shrieks, jumps up in the air, ticking arms and legs together, forming a cannonball - And crashing into the Witch King's leg with a dagger.

The Wraith King wibbles and wobbles in the air, careening drunkenly accross the Gondor rooftops - it zigzags herkily-jerkily out of site.

 

[purplemacar0n]

Scientific publishing is so fucked up that pirating from libgen should be considered a moral imperative at this point unless things change.

Exactly. Scientific articles are so expensive and usually, students just need them for a research paper citation. Even if you pirate a fictional book, there's still a lot you can learn from it. The last thing college students need is having to pay more money than crippling student debt.

 

[Flexo]

And now, here comes the Witch King. It starts firing at the white tower, likely intent on burning the whole city down. He grabs both sides of Gwaihir's head "You got this?" Gwaihir says in that voice that warbles from deep to shrill "CONSIDER IT DONE, GANDALF THE WHITE"

Gwaihir shrieks, jumps up in the air, ticking arms and legs together, forming a cannonball - And crashing into the Witch King's leg with a dagger.

The Wraith King wibbles and wobbles in the air, careening drunkenly accross the Gondor rooftops - it zigzags herkily-jerkily out of site.

I like the later typo switching the name, nice touch.

However I have to be that guy and point out that Eowyn kills the Witch King long before the eagles arrive, it would be a no-name Nazgul that is attacked by the eagles.

 

[Mola Ram]

I like the later typo switching the name, nice touch.

However I have to be that guy and point out that Eowyn kills the Witch King long before the eagles arrive, it would be a no-name Nazgul that is attacked by the eagles.

Khamûl the Easterling would like to have a word.

 

[Flexo]

Khamûl the Easterling would like to have a word.

I recognize him only as Ulaire Attea.

 

[Mola Ram]

I recognize him only as Ulaire Attea.

Well if you want to get into esoteric names of dubious canonicity, let me whip a Ren the Unclean on you.

 

[Next Task]

This guy has 100% had a penis in his mouth.

Nah, he'd have milked being a queer writer to the hilt if that was the case. After all, to him and his ilk, being a straight white man is the easiest but worst thing you can be.

 

[Woke Capitalism]

Wendigprose is short. Very short. Lots of periods. You read it. Then your brain pauses. Constantly. Adjectives are at a minimum. Or they're stupid. Like herkily-jerkily. Who uses that? Wendig. Throw in a "yikes" for good measure. Also lesbians. Because you're woke. Woke wendigprose.

 

[Fake-n-Gay]

A couple of years ago an author named Kitty Glitter published an ebook parody that was making fun of Chuck Wendig. Wendig ended up getting the author banned from Amazon. I still have my copy of it in PDF form and figured I'd upload it here for anyone that wants to read it.

Chuck really wanted this book to vanish from the internet: https://docdro.id/mQSVbFN

Found on reddit. Not sure if it was posted yet. https://www.reddit.com/r/chapotraphouse2/comments/h8za00/chuck_wendig_ebook/

 

[Mola Ram]

Found on reddit. Not sure if it was posted yet. https://www.reddit.com/r/chapotraphouse2/comments/h8za00/chuck_wendig_ebook/

It's not even funny. I don't know what he was so exercised about. If he hadn't made a fuss, no one would even know about it. Typical.

 

[Karl der Grosse]

It doesn't matter if it was funny or not. The mere fact that someone, somewhere was making fun of Chuck sent him into a rage, as it likely does each and every day of his worthless life.

 

[RomanesEuntDomus]

Wendigprose is short. Very short. Lots of periods. You read it. Then your brain pauses. Constantly. Adjectives are at a minimum. Or they're stupid. Like herkily-jerkily. Who uses that? Wendig. Throw in a "yikes" for good measure. Also lesbians. Because you're woke. Woke wendigprose.

It's scary how easy it is to copy that ""style"".

 

[TaimuRadiu]

The oldest universal writing advice for hacks is "write what you know".

Tolkien knew linguistics and mythology. Heinlein knew the military. Bradbury knew Middle America. Stephen King knows creepy shit in Maine.

What does Wendig know, chugging soy and making babytalk on Twitter?

 

[AnOminous]

Wendigprose is short. Very short. Lots of periods. You read it. Then your brain pauses. Constantly. Adjectives are at a minimum. Or they're stupid. Like herkily-jerkily. Who uses that?

No writer you should read. Also that's not an adjective. It's a really weird, dumb attempt at an adverb. It fails to be either. I bet this moron thinks he's the reincarnation of Harlan Ellison or some shit, anyway Ellison is almost certainly canceled these days for being a weird creep, and Wendig can't write.