Containment Random Chris Updates

[Tiger Tanaka]

Makes you wonder what is Chris's idea of a fancy dinner or classy restaurant. Due to his limited worldview Applebees might saddly be the high-end of the dinning world to him.

Given how disobedient, noisy, and fidgety Chris was in his court appearances, and how one is expected to behave, it would be interesting to see Chris in high class dining. If you've seen Pretty Woman, or the Dark Knight Rises, you know those kind of places Richard Gere or Bruce Wayne dine. They have a dozen different pieces of cutlery, a violinist in the background, a wine menu, and a maitre d. Chris walks in and it would turn more heads than Heath Ledger's Joker asking where he can find Harvey Dent.

"Wanna know how I got these scars? MY MOTHER AND FATHER WERE ANGRY AT ME!"

It makes me think of something else though regarding Chris-Chan's scope of creativity.

Chris considers himself an actual God, but his purview as this deity is to be the ruler of a small rural town with a mall, and tangle with mall security. His imagination cannot summon the Illiad scope required for that power level. Where as the Norse Gods battle Jormungandr, Zeus wages war with the Titans, and Osiris must clash with Set, our own Goddess must battle Jacob Sockness raping them, and pizza deliveries he did not request.

On the shit show stream he did with Max Mandu, he claims he's Sonichu and zapping it to the extreme. If this is the definition of extreme, the CWC-Ville afterlife is less Valhalla or Elysium and more a purgatory brony-con where you dance with an invisible Magi-Chan.

 

[Tikbalang]

Given how disobedient, noisy, and fidgety Chris was in his court appearances, and how one is expected to behave, it would be interesting to see Chris in high class dining. If you've seen Pretty Woman, or the Dark Knight Rises, you know those kind of places Richard Gere or Bruce Wayne dine. They have a dozen different pieces of cutlery, a violinist in the background, a wine menu, and a maitre d. Chris walks in and it would turn more heads than Heath Ledger's Joker asking where he can find Harvey Dent.

"Wanna know how I got these scars? MY MOTHER AND FATHER WERE ANGRY AT ME!"

It makes me think of something else though regarding Chris-Chan's scope of creativity.

Chris considers himself an actual God, but his purview as this deity is to be the ruler of a small rural town with a mall, and tangle with mall security. His imagination cannot summon the Illiad scope required for that power level. Where as the Norse Gods battle Jormungandr, Zeus wages war with the Titans, and Osiris must clash with Set, our own Goddess must battle Jacob Sockness raping them, and pizza deliveries he did not request.

On the shit show stream he did with Max Mandu, he claims he's Sonichu and zapping it to the extreme. If this is the definition of extreme, the CWC-Ville afterlife is less Valhalla or Elysium and more a purgatory brony-con where you dance with an invisible Magi-Chan.

To Chris, the battle in Cwcville is power fantasy. In real life, any inconvenience is an ordeal. It's his personal view of his heaven.

Like most religions, one of the selling points to get new converts is a convincing afterlife. Back then it's eternal buffet without needing to take a shit, others is eternal virgin fucking without the need of foreplay and consent; to Chris it's eternal Disneyland

 

[The Dude]

Makes you wonder what is Chris's idea of a fancy dinner or classy restaurant. Due to his limited worldview Applebees might saddly be the high-end of the dinning world to him. And judging from his honeymoon dinner in the one comic what would be an ordinary weekday dinner for most people is the meal of a lifetime to Chris.


At least Cole has a sympathetic goal; finding out who his real father is due to his abusive whore mother lying to him. Chris wants Cole to vote for his video so he can win a contest in the hopes of having sex with his best friend who thought he was a creep. Both brothers are total fuck-ups and laughingstocks but Cole will always come out ahead in a comparison between the two just because Chris is that messed up.

I'd love to see Chris' reaction (assuming he were ever to take up his Love Quest again) to a woman wanting to go to a Ruth's Chris or some other place on a date where you can easily spend $100 or more on a meal for two. Completely hypothetical, of course, since no woman (or man for that matter) in their right mind would want to legitimately date Chris. He'd probably bitch that spending that much on one meal is crazy and he'd rather spend that money on Transformers or some other childish shit.

And as much as a smug piece of shit Cole is, he's definitely a more sympathetic figure than Chris. His own mother lied about who his father is, and likely for petty, selfish reasons (like that she didn't want to admit to being a total whore). And Chris refused to accept that his mother is anything other than an honest, saintly figure who would never lie to her own children to spare herself the shame of being a slut. And at least Cole could get laid without paying for it.

Cole is an absolutely unmitigated asshole with no excuse whatsoever for being such an utter cunt. Chris has at least a partial excuse.

Just because Chris is a mongo doesn't excuse him from being a shitty excuse for a human being. There are plenty of other people with similar mental conditions as Chris who manage to be decent people. Just because someone has Autism or whatever doesn't give them a free pass to be a terrible person or excuse them from being held accountable for their behavior. Like @Super Colon Blow said, too many people think disabled = innocent, and that's flat wrong.

To Chris, the battle in Cwcville is power fantasy. In real life, any inconvenience is an ordeal. It's his personal view of his heaven.

Like most religions, one of the selling points to get new converts is a convincing afterlife. Back then it's eternal buffet without needing to take a shit, others is eternal virgin fucking without the need of foreplay and consent; to Chris it's eternal Disneyland

Chris hasn't even been to Disneyland. I doubt he's been to anything more exciting than a two-bit county fair, the kind where the most thrilling thing is the Gravitron, those portable roller coaster-esque rides that just go in a loop, and the green apple splatters you get from eating the food. Chris' idea of Heaven is a kiddie cartoon where all of life's problems get solved in a 30min time slot and nothing really exciting or dangerous happens. Hell, the Matterhorn Bobsleds and Big Thunder Mountain Railroad would literally scare the shit out Chris. Chris' Heaven would be the most saccharine, bland, tame cartoon you could think of. No conflict, no responsibilities, no one telling him what to do, everyone is his friend, kissing his ass all the time and worshiping the ground he waddles on, and he always gets whatever he wants. Everyone would be a cartoon character whose only purpose would be to entertain Chris and cater to his every whim.

 

[Chan Fan]

I'd love to see Chris' reaction (assuming he were ever to take up his Love Quest again) to a woman wanting to go to a Ruth's Chris or some other place on a date where you can easily spend $100 or more on a meal for two. Completely hypothetical, of course, since no woman (or man for that matter) in their right mind would want to legitimately date Chris. He'd probably bitch that spending that much on one meal is crazy and he'd rather spend that money on Transformers or some other childish shit.

And as much as a smug piece of shit Cole is, he's definitely a more sympathetic figure than Chris. His own mother lied about who his father is, and likely for petty, selfish reasons (like that she didn't want to admit to being a total whore). And Chris refused to accept that his mother is anything other than an honest, saintly figure who would never lie to her own children to spare herself the shame of being a slut. And at least Cole could get laid without paying for it.



Just because Chris is a mongo doesn't excuse him from being a shitty excuse for a human being. There are plenty of other people with similar mental conditions as Chris who manage to be decent people. Just because someone has Autism or whatever doesn't give them a free pass to be a terrible person or excuse them from being held accountable for their behavior. Like @Super Colon Blow said, too many people think disabled = innocent, and that's flat wrong.

I think Cole had a lot of reasons to end up being a prick but at the same time with therapy and work on his end I think he could have risen above what he was and been a much better person. He could be a movie critic without saying 'hurr hurr everyone likes Ladybird, I guess I'll say I didn't like it to be different' (when that movie had some very legitimate problems he could have criticized but he didn't do that.) He doesn't have to talk to his mother or stepfather but could have had a relationship with Chris where he just said, 'Hey, I'll vote for you to win that challenge but let's not talk about our mom' but he didn't do that, either. Cole has had plenty of room to take the high ground in the past and in present day but I generally have the same hope for him as I do for Chris

 

[The Dude]

I think Cole had a lot of reasons to end up being a prick but at the same time with therapy and work on his end I think he could have risen above what he was and been a much better person. He could be a movie critic without saying 'hurr hurr everyone likes Ladybird, I guess I'll say I didn't like it to be different' (when that movie had some very legitimate problems he could have criticized but he didn't do that.) He doesn't have to talk to his mother or stepfather but could have had a relationship with Chris where he just said, 'Hey, I'll vote for you to win that challenge but let's not talk about our mom' but he didn't do that, either. Cole has had plenty of room to take the high ground in the past and in present day but I generally have the same hope for him as I do for Chris

Cole has at least been able to make a life for himself. He was able to make a living and be independent without going on welfare, have healthy adult relationships, and even get married to a woman who is successful enough that he can commit to being a film critic full-time. He absolutely could have handled things better, but he's not a manchild living with his parents rent-free and collecting NEET/TardBux. He's far from perfect, but he could be far worse.

 

[Tikbalang]

Chris' Heaven would be the most saccharine, bland, tame cartoon you could think of. No conflict, no responsibilities, no one telling him what to do, everyone is his friend, kissing his ass all the time and worshiping the ground he waddles on, and he always gets whatever he wants. Everyone would be a cartoon character whose only purpose would be to entertain Chris and cater to his every whim.

Sounds like every deadly sins is featured in his heaven

1. Every fictional characters is a living kimmi doll.
2. Unlimited McDonalds with no health risk
3. Every games, movies and healing crystal (meth) are in his possession
4. Everyone who's better than him are put to death.
5. Everyone who mocks him are put to torture.
6. No responsibilities for being a state leader like a british queen
7. His inflated ego gets stretch marks by being called a godes

 

[LoveYouLongTime]

I believe on of the Catherine dates was also to an Applebee's, and if I'm not mistaken that's where @LoveYouLongTime went with him in the videos of him drinking and singing karaoke as well.

We went to Applebee's one time. The karaoke was at this Mexican restaurant where he put sugar in his Bud Lite. As it's safe to tell this part of the story since I no longer have the vehicle and license plate tag, back then when he first discovered alcohol we were at the Mexican restaurant. The parking lot was really small. As we were leaving he just happened to be parked next to me. Later that night I did a call and he repeated my license plate back to me and asked me what it meant. Panicking, we got the guy playing as my boyfriend to get on the line to scare the shit out of Chris into forgetting my license plate.

Lesson learned, I always made the effort to park farther away even if it meant in another lot and just walked.

I'm curious what restaurant he chose, anyone know?

 

[Fapcop]

We went to Applebee's one time. The karaoke was at this Mexican restaurant where he put sugar in his Bud Lite. As it's safe to tell this part of the story since I no longer have the vehicle and license plate tag, back then when he first discovered alcohol we were at the Mexican restaurant. The parking lot was really small. As we were leaving he just happened to be parked next to me. Later that night I did a call and he repeated my license plate back to me and asked me what it meant. Panicking, we got the guy playing as my boyfriend to get on the line to scare the shit out of Chris into forgetting my license plate.

Lesson learned, I always made the effort to park farther away even if it meant in another lot and just walked.

I'm curious what restaurant he chose, anyone know?

It be interesting to see you take Chris out again. (No pressure, lol!)

On the old videos with Chris and you guys Chris sounds socially awkward and autistic, but not hopelessly so.

There’s regular human interaction, he can keep a pretty normal conversation, and he doesn’t seem nearly as insufferably smug as in recent public videos.

I wonder if there’d be any of that today, or if it would just degenerate into weird merging and goddess nonsense.

 

[RJ MacReady]

Later that night I did a call and he repeated my license plate back to me and asked me what it meant.

I don't get this. Why was he so curious about your licence plate?

 

[LoveYouLongTime]

It be interesting to see you take Chris out again. (No pressure, lol!)

On the old videos with Chris and you guys Chris sounds socially awkward and autistic, but not hopelessly so.

There’s regular human interaction, he can keep a pretty normal conversation, and he doesn’t seem nearly as insufferably smug as in recent public videos.

I wonder if there’d be any of that today, or if it would just degenerate into weird merging and goddess nonsense.

Well, I did hang out with him around the extortion saga to introduce him to a friend who was visiting as a joke. I don’t remember if I regaled you all with that story or if I just dropped tidbits. If anyone is interested, I'll tell it to the best of my memories.

I don't get this. Why was he so curious about your licence plate?

Autism.

 

[Mariposa Electrique]

I don't get this. Why was he so curious about your licence plate?

Because he's known to be a gross stalker.

Autism

I notice his hyperfocus is pretty selective with women. I don't believe you'd fake a relationship if it was purely autism.

 

[Fapcop]

Well, I did hang out with him around the extortion saga to introduce him to a friend who was visiting as a joke. I don’t remember if I regaled you all with that story or if I just dropped tidbits. If anyone is interested, I'll tell it to the best of my memories.

Go on?

 

[RJ MacReady]

Autism.

Come to think of it, the Chandlers are well known for their love of vanity plates. I wonder if Chris's tard brain thought yours also had some kind of meaning.

 

[DeeCeeBees]

I hear the “BWESTON” and the “IBMRC” plates are up for grabs.

 

[Mariposa Electrique]

Come to think of it, the Chandlers are well known for their love of vanity plates. I wonder if Chris's tard brain thought yours also had some kind of meaning.

I wish Chris would have been a bible sperg.

 

[LoveYouLongTime]

I notice his hyperfocus is pretty selective with women. I don't believe you'd fake a relationship if it was purely autism.

Yes in most aspects but Chris notices dumb shit like that especially if it's right there in front of his face. If my car was parked spaces away he probably wouldn't have noticed.

Reaching into the reservoirs of my memories of back then, I'm laughing about how we had to create a boyfriend character for me just to keep him from being too creepy. It worked most of the time and when he would overstep his boundaries we had said boyfriend get on the line to spook him. He would metaphorically go into hedgehog defense mode. It also worked to our advantage if we wanted him to do something and he was more inclined to do it if I fed him a story about how me and the boyfriend were fighting.

Go on?

A friend was coming to visit from out of town and he had been such a huge fan of Sonichu for a long time(kek). I never planned to hang out with Chris ever again but I figured it would be a last good hoorah and as a treat to my friend. So I set up it up and we met at The Tea Bazaar. Another friend came along as well. Chris showed up looking like he got dressed in a Goodwill with his eyes closed with his damn Sonichu medallions and tacky ass arm bands and braclets.

Introductions included introducing us to Magichan and I think Mewtwo who were supposed to be sitting in some empty seating. Afterwards, almost fucking immediately he pulled out this fairly large pouch from under his shirt which was around his neck. He dumped the contents out on the table which were a bunch of crystals and rocks. For the next agonizing half hour+ he picked up every single one to tell us what it was and what "properties" it had. No matter how hard we tried to change the subject he immediately went back to powering through his rock collection. Nothing would deter him. Eventually the rock lecture ended and we were free to steer the conversation elsewhere.

He gifted me a copy of one of his comics and an amethyst stone which I later gave my friend because I didn't need those cursed items in my house. Most of the conversation was him talking about the other dimension and his powers. He bragged about how he was able to produce electricity with his hand, in which he held out his hand in a claw like manor, the concentration on his face akin to that of an infant trying to pass a hard poop. Then he asked if we could see it which we didn't indulge him and told him no. His response was along the lines of "Mmm, okay."

He told me he was able to produced sparks with his magical highschool ring when he struck it against some stone on his bracelet. I told him the stone in his ring was chipped from doing that. My friend humored him a little bit asking him questions about toon world. Friend kept using words like Armageddon and the apolocalypse which Chris didn't like. Friend also compared him to Robotnik which he got mad at.

Honestly, I zoned out a lot of the time because really, Chris is fucking boring. He's an entertaining novelty for about 30 minutes. Longer than that, you start to wonder why you put yourself in that situation.

 

[Tikbalang]

Honestly, I zoned out a lot of the time because really, Chris is fucking boring. He's an entertaining novelty for about 30 minutes. Longer than that, you start to wonder why you put yourself in that situation.

Null said the similar thing about the 30-minute rule.

 

[Alex Krycek]

He's an entertaining novelty for about 30 minutes. Longer than that, you start to wonder why you put yourself in that situation.

This is exactly why I don’t understand people who reach out to Chris, I’m in the minority that in the case of Copitz it’s good someone at least got him away from Barb and was genuinely trying to have fun with him in a way that was benign but would I ever want to talk to Chris myself? A hard no. Chris is insane and while it’s funny to watch from afar it’s actually kind of boring - even a little annoying to have to deal with someone’s delusions to that extent.

 

[Fapcop]

This is exactly why I don’t understand people who reach out to Chris, I’m in the minority that in the case of Copitz it’s good someone at least got him away from Barb and was genuinely trying to have fun with him in a way that was benign but would I ever want to talk to Chris myself? A hard no. Chris is insane and while it’s funny to watch from afar it’s actually kind of boring - even a little annoying to have to deal with someone’s delusions to that extent.

Everyone wants to experience the freak for themselves, I guess.

Frankly I think the attention has been for the worse for him.

Chris is a pretty cocky bastard these days, probably the result of weens all wanting to have their 15 mins with him and experience the nutty ness for themselves.

He also seems way more insufferable. The attention has made him think that it’s acceptable to just go on nonsensical rants about dimensional merges and cartoon characters.

Something the old Chris at least had the social skills to avoid.

 

[A Grey Cat]

Makes you wonder what is Chris's idea of a fancy dinner or classy restaurant. Due to his limited worldview Applebees might saddly be the high-end of the dinning world to him. And judging from his honeymoon dinner in the one comic what would be an ordinary weekday dinner for most people is the meal of a lifetime to Chris.


At least Cole has a sympathetic goal; finding out who his real father is due to his abusive whore mother lying to him. Chris wants Cole to vote for his video so he can win a contest in the hopes of having sex with his best friend who thought he was a creep. Both brothers are total fuck-ups and laughingstocks but Cole will always come out ahead in a comparison between the two just because Chris is that messed up.

Eh it's been a while since I've had Applebee's but it's not too bad great place to go once the covid crisis had passed for beers and burgers


Also when the last home cooked meal you have is a spaghetti dinner that ends in your mom threating to kill herself then never Making a meal for her husband and son ever again you'd think sailsbury steak and collard greens would be high end eats too