Tess Holliday / Ryann Maegen Hoven - Beached Landwhale model, Body positive and social justice snacktivist, and gigantic fraud

How much does Ryann weigh?

  • 300-350lbs (Panda Bear)

    Votes: 26 1.0%
  • 350-400lbs (Bull Caribou)

    Votes: 146 5.5%
  • 400-450lbs (Heart of a Blue Whale)

    Votes: 379 14.2%
  • 450-500lbs (Pigmy Hippo)

    Votes: 545 20.5%
  • 500-550lbs (Domestic Pig)

    Votes: 394 14.8%
  • 550-600lbs (Baby Grand Piano)

    Votes: 318 12.0%
  • 600-650lbs (Vending Machine)

    Votes: 192 7.2%
  • 650+ (A Fucking Planet)

    Votes: 661 24.8%

  • Total voters
    2,661
She's just doubling down on the stupid with that fucking dress, she claims she was on worst-dressed lists, but no one has been able to find one site that said this.

Some sites say they didn't care for the dress, but Tess herself looked ok.
She just moves the goalposts as she goes along, then claims ok, she wasn't on best/worst dressed lists, she's being ignored cause she's fat.

She's as exhausting to be around as Musty. I feel like she sucks all of the oxygen out of a place she's in.
 

Jesus Christ, Tess - can you fucking do something other than stare at your phone like some teenage girl doing a bathroom selfie? Either learn to emote (no, that "dead fish" look doesn't count) or get Jolene to take your photo. The latter option is best, since Messy Tessy clearly doesn't have the mental coherence to set up a shot AND pose.
 
Woo, lots of bullshit. Didn't bother opening the graphics program because it's late and I have work soon, therefore I can't afford to drink myself into oblivion and that's inevitably what happens when I stare at pixels made by dumb fucks with cameras.

Still, screen shots are big, so they're under a spoiler.

Screen Shot 2020-08-18 at 12.28.55 AM.png

This right here is why I won't bother with any further staring at these images. Because her fucking elbow. I have already grabbed a tasty adult beverage thanks to that shit. I mean, WTF?!!? I know she's inhaled enough cake to feed Ethiopia, but this makes it real evident. Her elbow fat has its own dedicated fat roll. That's impressive.

Screen Shot 2020-08-18 at 12.29.10 AM.png

Confirmation of hotel. Nice cheap rolling luggage there, Tess.

Screen Shot 2020-08-18 at 12.30.21 AM.png

And if you look carefully, you can see her panty line. So that 4x is fitting like a fucking second skin. Yikes.

Screen Shot 2020-08-18 at 12.30.50 AM.png

Finally, I'm no purse fanatic, so I have no fucking clue what kind of bag this is. Just thought I'd bring it up because I know there's some folks here that are really into handbags and can give us all a general idea as to the make/model/year/approximate cost/quality of it.
 
My guess is that she has a friend that lets her use this space for free. Probably someone who works in a hotel or has an airBnB that is empty now since California is void of tourists. I'm just waiting for her OnlyFans, betting money on that appearing on 2020!

edit. Apparently I was drunk or something, so many typos....
 
Last edited:


Is it just me or do her eyes in these new fabletics photos look swollen? Like she’s been crying? Or is it the injections? I wonder if she is crying because she’s getting called out on Twitter. She has made an arse out of herself as usual. 😂... it’s her own fault. Tess can talk all the shit she wants but, she is her own worst enemy because her mouth consistently gets her into trouble. She can’t stop being the woke heroine to the masses but, what she don’t realize is the woke mob devours their own.
 

First of all, if you're sofa king exhausted being treated differently in fashion...you could...I don't know...LEAVE and get a job at McDick's. There's no downside! You'll still be earning money that you'll never spend on your children because you NEED champagne cake and tard scribbles. You'll be surrounded by your favorite thing: shitty junk food, and the best part is you'll be working a career worthy of your true paygrade and educational status!

"I don't need your validation." LOL.
Then get the entire fuck OFF the internet and PARENT your children. FYI: Parenting means interacting, teaching good morals and proper boundaries, cooking healthy meals, and seeing to their education. I know it's soooper difficult because you reaawwwy reaawwwy neeeedz your sheet cakes and shitty tattoos.

Christ...
 
I'm a bit late to the strawberry dress party, but is she actually trying to make a thing out of the fact that a fucking tulle dress debuting in January didn't catch on until summer?

Yes, she is whining that younger and thinner women wear it on Tik Tok and made it popular. While no one cared that she wore it first, because she is fat. Which is -of course- horse shit, as there are plenty of articles about her in that dress.

She even tried to string along black people, which hilariously backfired.

Then she claimed that she turned up on worst dressed lists -because fatphobic media- but failed to provide any links to the source. Because the source is her ass. This also backfired.

Now she says she never made such claims and managed to get another article about her. She must still have ties to some BuzzFeed tier media outlets. It's hilarious and ridiculous at the same time.
 
View attachment 1528585
Finally, I'm no purse fanatic, so I have no fucking clue what kind of bag this is. Just thought I'd bring it up because I know there's some folks here that are really into handbags and can give us all a general idea as to the make/model/year/approximate cost/quality of it.

Looks to be just a makeup bag/zippered toilette case. A knock off done in the style of Stephen Sprouse’s graffiti bags for Louis Vuitton back in the early 00’s.
 
Back