Orbiter Phil’s Weird Body... - Like, WTF? I’ve never seen anything like it.

[TheTractor]

Maybe the drooping mouth goes back to his car accident, like sweet deranged nigel mentionned; facial nerve damage probably.

I found disgusting footage of his bad genes passed from his aunt forcing him to eat cheese steak sandwiches back in 2013 and the drop was significant.

Recent footage in comparison

 

[Phil Ken Sebben]

And then he'd pimp slap the shit out of her.

He'd run away like a pussy and then claim later that he slapped her.

 

[UncleTusky]

Maybe the drooping mouth goes back to his car accident, like sweet deranged nigel mentionned; facial nerve damage probably.

Except it probably never happened. Phil's documented his whole life online since about 2000, first mentioned the car crash around 2010, and has changed the details so often that it's very hard to believe any of the stories are true (especially when none of our top autists can point to a stretch where he unexpectedly dropped off the Internet or a stream where he came back looking or acting noticeably different). I can't explain why he's doing that thing with his face but it's a real leap to pin it on his mythical car crash.

EDIT: Phil has had an easy life to the point that he considers Netflix to be a vital necessity. I just can't imagine him not whining every day about his car crash or comparing himself to Job for what happened.

 

[Sparkletor 2.0]

Except it probably never happened. Phil's documented his whole life online since about 2000, first mentioned the car crash around 2010, and has changed the details so often that it's very hard to believe any of the stories are true (especially when none of our top autists can point to a stretch where he unexpectedly dropped off the Internet or a stream where he came back looking or acting noticeably different). I can't explain why he's doing that thing with his face but it's a real leap to pin it on his mythical car crash.

EDIT: Phil has had an easy life to the point that he considers Netflix to be a vital necessity. I just can't imagine him not whining every day about his car crash or comparing himself to Job for what happened.

My best autistic guess is the car crash happened in 2000 or 2001. This was just after he finished high school.

 

[millais]

He did get to the point of exaggerating that the car crash burned half of his face. Maybe one day he will blame it for not only the droopy mouth but the melty jowels and patchy beard as well.

 

[hector85]

He did get to the point of exaggerating that the car crash burned half of his face. Maybe one day he will blame it for not only the droopy mouth but the melty jowels and patchy beard as well.

2 years from now: "car crash GAVE me gout dood!"

 

[Quantum Diabetes]

Phil's ultimate form? He's heading that way

 

[Shirō Ishii]

View attachment 1558287Phil's ultimate form? He's heading that way

This is Kiwifarms, not DeviantArt. I'd say post it there, but god knows we need another potential sperg/paypig to find Phil through shitty blueberry porn......actually, post it on DeviantArt and see if it lands in a whale. We've laughed at furries and inflation fetish retards, but IIRC, we've yet to find a DSP fan into blueberry expansion. The holy trifecta of autism must be completed!

 

[Quantum Diabetes]

This is Kiwifarms, not DeviantArt. I'd say post it there, but god knows we need another potential sperg/paypig to find Phil through shitty blueberry porn......actually, post it on DeviantArt and see if it lands in a whale. We've laughed at furries and inflation fetish retards, but IIRC, we've yet to find a DSP fan into blueberry expansion. The holy trifecta of autism must be completed!

I should make it a cherry since you know, it helps with gout

 

[Providence Backing_21]

Dear God he's melting like wax slowly fusing into his smelly chair.

 

[Xolanite]

He'd run away like a pussy and then claim later that he slapped her.

*he‘d waddle away

 

[Sparkletor 2.0]

From top to bottom mostly:

Balding
Oddly shaped head
Strange ear crease
Dead eyes
Drooping stroke face
Wart
Bad teeth
Post nasal drip
Patchy goatee
Jowls
Overabundance of body hair
Bingo wings
Man boobs
Bad back
Flabby gut
Micro penis
Chicken legs
Gouty feet

 

[Pope of Trash]

Maybe the drooping mouth goes back to his car accident, like sweet deranged nigel mentionned; facial nerve damage probably.

I found disgusting footage of his bad genes passed from his aunt forcing him to eat cheese steak sandwiches back in 2013 and the drop was significant.

View attachment 1553900

Recent footage in comparison

View attachment 1553901

Maybe he had a stroke.

 

[starborn427614]

Maybe he had a stroke.

You'd think the camera would've caught that like the last time he was stroking.

 

[tits-Burnell]

From top to bottom mostly:

Balding
Oddly shaped head
Strange ear crease
Dead eyes
Drooping stroke face
Wart
Bad teeth
Post nasal drip
Patchy goatee
Jowls
Overabundance of body hair
Bingo wings
Man boobs
Bad back
Flabby gut
Micro penis
Chicken legs
Gouty feet

- Double chin
- Old lady shoulders
- Weak jawline
- Bulbous gin nose
- Frank's sign

 

[Iron Father]

Also, is it normal to keep using a t-shirt you bought ten years ago?

I have some old shirts too, but I think the difference is I wouldn't wear decade-or-more old shirts while streaming. Just me, but looking like a slob on cam to hundreds if not thousands of people doesn't appeal to me. Maybe the slob look is part of his begging grift.

 

[behind_the_scenes_begging]

From top to bottom mostly:

Balding
Oddly shaped head
Strange ear crease
Dead eyes
Drooping stroke face
Wart
Bad teeth
Post nasal drip
Patchy goatee
Jowls
Overabundance of body hair
Bingo wings
Man boobs
Bad back
Flabby gut
Micro penis
Chicken legs
Gouty feet

We need a DSP Da Vinci Vitruvian man graphic, which we can tag various afflictions to. What a specimen he is.

Poor eyesight
Ears requiring ointment (assuming it wasn't just him taking a long weekend)
Greasy hair, body sweat
General poor hygiene and lack of hygiene awareness. Rarely showers, sits in his filth like not washing his hands after the incident, tugging his tracksuit pants out of his crack.
Cognitive/mental causes for his atypical behaviours, difficulty learning, poor impulse control, and poor decision making
Internal damage caused by sedentary lifestyle, poor diet and alcohol intake, all risk factors for things like cancer and diabetes.
Possible medical explanation for his abnormal burping/indigestion.
Whatever is behind his swaying, poor balance, lack of situational awareness, generally slow/unsteady gait, what must be very bottom percentile of reflexes (lack of confidence behind the wheel, no credible lore as an athlete, even participating in team sports at school).

It's hard to imagine Phil catching a ball if one was thrown at him, compared to wingsofredemption who despite not being a generally healthy guy does not appear to have any issues with his reflexes or balance, and probably could catch a ball.

all these things are compounded by poor help seeking behaviours (won't spend the $ to get medical treatment, delusions of being healthy and successful, being easily led by stupid advice available online when it confirms his biases like COVID-19 was just the flu).

 

[Sparkletor 2.0]

We need a DSP Da Vinci Vitruvian man graphic, which we can tag various afflictions to. What a specimen he is.

Poor eyesight
Ears requiring ointment (assuming it wasn't just him taking a long weekend)
Greasy hair, body sweat
General poor hygiene and lack of hygiene awareness. Rarely showers, sits in his filth like not washing his hands after the incident, tugging his tracksuit pants out of his crack.
Cognitive/mental causes for his atypical behaviours, difficulty learning, poor impulse control, and poor decision making
Internal damage caused by sedentary lifestyle, poor diet and alcohol intake, all risk factors for things like cancer and diabetes.
Possible medical explanation for his abnormal burping/indigestion.
Whatever is behind his swaying, poor balance, lack of situational awareness, generally slow/unsteady gait, what must be very bottom percentile of reflexes (lack of confidence behind the wheel, no credible lore as an athlete, even participating in team sports at school).

It's hard to imagine Phil catching a ball if one was thrown at him, compared to wingsofredemption who despite not being a generally healthy guy does not appear to have any issues with his reflexes or balance, and probably could catch a ball.

all these things are compounded by poor help seeking behaviours (won't spend the $ to get medical treatment, delusions of being healthy and successful, being easily led by stupid advice available online when it confirms his biases like COVID-19 was just the flu).

The sports thing is a hard nut to crack.

Phil has said in the past that he never played sports. Also that he played tee ball. Also he didn't know what tee ball was. Also that he never played competitive sports. Also he played football with his friends. He also played baseball, football, badminton, and was a weightlifter. Phil also said he never learned to ride a bike or swim.

This is all a jumbled mess. If I had to bet money, I would wager Phil never did any sports.

Let's look at the "I hurt my back playing football" story. Who was Phil playing football with? Phil did not interact with people outside of the gaming scene. People who knew Phil in real life said he rarely did anything outside of the gaming tournaments. Are we to believe he had a separate group of friends who played football in the park?

Phil claims to be allergic to the sun and pollen. One afternoon of filming Project7 allegedly almost killed him from being outside. Yet we are supposed to believe he was out running around and playing football.

 

[Draventren]

I have some old shirts too, but I think the difference is I wouldn't wear decade-or-more old shirts while streaming. Just me, but looking like a slob on cam to hundreds if not thousands of people doesn't appeal to me. Maybe the slob look is part of his begging grift.

I own loads of old shirts that are just comfy. Shit that I'll wear if I'm painting, or doing yard work, or exercising or just hanging out at home. I don't even think it'd be that weird to wear one of those comfy shirts on a stream, provided that the streamer wasn't constantly talking about how this is a professional business, yet wears exclusively cringy graphic tees and pajama bottoms.

Whatever is behind his swaying, poor balance, lack of situational awareness, generally slow/unsteady gait, what must be very bottom percentile of reflexes (lack of confidence behind the wheel, no credible lore as an athlete, even participating in team sports at school).

It's hard to imagine Phil catching a ball if one was thrown at him, compared to wingsofredemption who despite not being a generally healthy guy does not appear to have any issues with his reflexes or balance, and probably could catch a ball.

Even leaving aside his poor health and shit reflexes, I am so doubtful he played any team sports in an organized way. Not peewee as a kid, or beer league as an adult, mostly because of his massive attitude issues. Team sports are a great way to learn how to work with other people towards a goal, handle differences between yourself and others to achieve something larger by combining your strengths, and develop leadership abilities when chips are down. Phil sucks at all of those things, people can attest to him being cancerous to try and work with as a person, can't handle letting others take attention away from him even if it's good for the show/stream, and most importantly has no ability to think on the fly or adapt to bad situations.

It's only like 30 years too late, but I think his parents should have put him on a baseball team or something, would have probably given him some actual life skills.

 

[SkippyLongbottom]

I own loads of old shirts that are just comfy. Shit that I'll wear if I'm painting, or doing yard work, or exercising or just hanging out at home. I don't even think it'd be that weird to wear one of those comfy shirts on a stream, provided that the streamer wasn't constantly talking about how this is a professional business, yet wears exclusively cringy graphic tees and pajama bottoms.



Even leaving aside his poor health and shit reflexes, I am so doubtful he played any team sports in an organized way. Not peewee as a kid, or beer league as an adult, mostly because of his massive attitude issues. Team sports are a great way to learn how to work with other people towards a goal, handle differences between yourself and others to achieve something larger by combining your strengths, and develop leadership abilities when chips are down. Phil sucks at all of those things, people can attest to him being cancerous to try and work with as a person, can't handle letting others take attention away from him even if it's good for the show/stream, and most importantly has no ability to think on the fly or adapt to bad situations.

It's only like 30 years too late, but I think his parents should have put him on a baseball team or something, would have probably given him some actual life skills.

I could easily excuse his lack of being able to work with others or have synergy if he would at least be self-reliant and self-sufficient but he has proven over time he doesn't even have that strength. Dude is a total baby who relies on others but yet wants to act like the tough lone wolf type.