DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell - General Discussion

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My favorite worst DSP costume was when he was a ninja turtle.

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This is the most autistic low effort costume he's worn to date. When has a Ninja turtle worn a yellow racing shirt? Is the backpack supposed to be his shell? Why didn't he shave? Wasn't Phil making "fuck you" money on YouTube at this time? And this is the best he could do?

This was so retarded.

Runner up for worst costume was the Punisher costume which was a shirt with Punisher's skull logo and a leather coat.

Best costume was probably the Assassin's Creed one.
 
DSP just purposely made his playthrough extra boring by picking the "Modern" difficulty setting in Crash Bandictoot, which means he has an unlimited supply of lives, as opposed to the "Retro" option that makes you go game over if you run out of lives (like the original games used to be).

King of Retro.

Also, he died on literally the first enemy in the game:

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-EDIT- He's now insulting people in chat who want him to play on Retro mode by calling them "whiny". Literally his whole chat wants him to play Retro mode.

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He also got pissy already at a stream regular cheering about being sad about him not playing Retro mode. Didn't even read out the cheer.

Yep, this will be deemed a "detractor meme" and mentioning the Retro mode will be a bannable offense before this stream is over.
This is the real reason his actual fanbase is so lobotomized, more-so than even the monotony and repetition of his streams. Any time they want Phil to do something to make the stream more entertaining, 90% of the time they're instantly brute-forced into complacency.
"My REAL VIEWERS don't want to see me suffer!" Don't ever ask for anything, just know that Phil's comfort matters more than you.
 
He's gonna fucking hate Divinity 2 if he plays it. That, or read a complete breakdown on how to perfectly build his characters.

It really is fucked up that DSP has so many longtime committed fans yet he refuses to do anything with them. Small streams should be building ties with their community. If he had ANY fucking friends or trusted people at all, he could roll through Divinity 2 with a friend/s.
i loved divinity 2 and mostly fucked myself by forgetting a single quest, unless he plays on the easiest difficulty, he'll skip quests and be several levels under the expected and be mopped by the last encounter and proceed to quit because "waaat the game didn't say the fight ended when THE GUY died, you mean i could just focus him? bullshit dood, bullshit"
i still beat it but it was a lot of phil style brute forcing the end fight
oh and you know phil would never share divinity with his party members
 
My favorite worst DSP costume was when he was a ninja turtle.

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Every time I see that picture it reminds me of Butterball (BB) from Marvel comics. The thing is this hero is useless as Dave. Butterball has a unique mutant power of Immutability/Invulnerability/Immortality. Now that means he can never die, never age, nor get hurt by anything. However, even with such great power, he has some big weaknesses:

  • Impaired Sense of Touch: As a side-effect of his invulnerability, his sense of touch is impaired.
  • Superhuman Stamina/Modified Metabolism/"Frozen" Body: He's also "frozen" at the physical state he was in when his powers were activated, making his body incapable of losing or gaining weight or muscle mass.
  • Weak Human: His strength is below an average human. Out of shape and highly unathletic.
  • Extreme Clumsiness
  • Emery stated he couldn't swim
"The kid's not a rocket scientist. He's not strong. He's not fast. And even if he wasn't built like a tub of pudding... He'd still be a klutz." -Taskmaster

Now, this is Dave to a T. Dave still lives in the past like BB is stuck with the same body as he is "frozen". Both are weaker than average humans, both are clumsy and dumb, and of course, they both can't swim. Fun fact, a girl wanted to fuck BB because she can't hurt him with her fire body but since his body can't feel touch, he couldn't get a hard-on, thus impotent forever, just like Philly Boy. Also, BB had a nickname that fits Phil, Captain Man-Boobs. I wish people voted for BB costume because of the irony the two share lol
 
Now, this is Dave to a T. Dave still lives in the past like BB is stuck with the same body as he is "frozen". Both are weaker than average humans, both are clumsy and dumb, and of course, they both can't swim. Fun fact, a girl wanted to fuck BB because she can't hurt him with her fire body but since his body can't feel touch, he couldn't get a hard-on, thus impotent forever, just like Philly Boy. Also, BB had a nickname that fits Phil, Captain Man-Boobs. I wish people voted for BB costume because of the irony the two share lol
the thing is phil can't outlast BB
 
Press forward and tap "A" like in Super Mario 64, not that hard!

Jesus, almost 40 years old and doesn't know how to swim???
He probably never got the chance to learn. I mean other than literally living on the coast of the Atlantic ocean and hanging out on his friend Mark's dad's boat every weekend.
 
if he wants to get technical about viewership and "support/contributions", he has made thousands playing fire emblem, he was paid to play it, paid while playing it, and paid on youtube via ad revenue

is he mad because he isn't being paid more than thousands? lol
the best part is Phil actually picked fire emblem because of his need to fuck with his poll results to "get rid of fake votes" (because he can definitely see the ip and timestamps on every vote cast and isn't just eliminating games he doesn't want to play if they win) he ended up picking fire emblem which i believe came in 3rd or 4th on that poll and now he absolutely hates it, yawns excessively, and threatens his audience with no more "jrpg style" playthroughs if more money isn't donated.
 
Trump winning means stopping or at least slowing down slightly the dictatorship of sjw psychopaths . That alone is enough of a difference for me.
Trump lost me when he started the whole "don't worry about COVID, get back to work cows" shit. Trump doesn't give a fuck what happens to you, him and Biden are cut from exactly the same cloth. Trump winning in 2016 sure didn't slow SJWs down at all.
 
Imagine asking the self-appointed King of Retro to play a Retro Mode of a videogame for Retrograde spokes and rape roleplayers. When are you guys going to realize Phil is there to autopilot while stabilizing his cash cup play games and have fun? You may as well be asking him to drive a car or manifest an actual boner. Deal with it he's just not that guy anymore.


I love these things because he's of the mind that if he's not saying it directly on stream camera it essentially never happend and no record of it exists. It's where he proves unequivocally he's the same petty cuntrag he's always been. Cried about bigger Youtoobers in 2010 and cries about bigger (isn't that like everyone? Why go after top tier) streamers in 2020.

He's evahlved! :stress:
 
Phil said he doesn't technically know how to swim but it can't be that hard to do. He thinks you just float and lean forward.
C'mon, man, he grew up in the ghetto. You think they had pools out there?! It was basically the projects!

I'm pretty sure I already knew that Dave couldn't swim, but being reminded of it is just fucking hilarious.
 
Top tipper gets their name written on Phil's cleavage with a sharpie marker...
No way...........top tipper gets to write their name as a tramp stamp.
He probably never got the chance to learn. I mean other than literally living on the coast of the Atlantic ocean and hanging out on his friend Mark's dad's boat every weekend.
He outgrew floaties. They just don't make them that big.
 
C'mon, man, he grew up in the ghetto. You think they had pools out there?! It was basically the projects!

I'm pretty sure I already knew that Dave couldn't swim, but being reminded of it is just fucking hilarious.
Growing up in the ghetto is why he said he never learned to ride a bike. He was afraid the black kids would steal it. Phil's not racist by the way.

Actually I wonder if Phil didn't have a bike because his parents were the ones who thought the black kids would steal it. I find it kind of hard to believe a small boy would think, "Owning a bicycle would put me at high risk." Seems more like an idea an adult would have.
 
It could also be that Phil is legitimately such a failure that he somehow failed to learn how to ride a bike and how to swim, and in the former case either he rationalized it or his parents fed him this bullshit lie about how they didn't want to buy him a bike because it would get stolen, after all back then Connecticut was as bad and dangerous as Monrovia.
Does anyone know, has Phil mastered the art of tying shoes? I wouldn't be surprised if he doesn't know how to tie his own shoes.
 
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