Containment Random Chris Updates

[taintmisbehavin]

If his lifestyle lets him live that long, that is.
Remember in the future message where he claimed to be healthy and live to 100 or something?
Yeeeaah nooooooo...

I don’t know. Bob lived to be really old, and Barb is clinging to life like some gnarled, wide-eyed Joshua tree. Unhealthy lifestyle aside, those are some tenacious genes.

 

[The Fool]

I don’t know. Bob lived to be really old, and Barb is clinging to life like some gnarled, wide-eyed Joshua tree. Unhealthy lifestyle aside, those are some tenacious genes.

Chris' expected lifespan isn't dependent solely on his genes. There's a lot of other factors at play too, such as depression, other mental health factors (isn't autism linked to shorter lifespans? I thought that was brought up before but I was probably too drunk to read it), and most importantly is that he doesn't have anyone to care for him when he gets older. I've heard people say his twig limbs are a result of muscle atrophy from autism, so who knows what else that could be affecting, like his heart. He does have high blood pressure, doesn't he?
He can't rely solely on Bob and Barb's lifespans (which actually aren't even that long to begin with, if we're counting Barb being on her way out), given his lifestyle, and, more importantly, how absolutely fucked his genes are since he was born to senior citizens.
I agree genes play a big role in it, but he's really playing with fire given what his life has been.

 

[taintmisbehavin]

Sorry, I meant Barb and Bob also lived/live unhealthy lifestyles and managed to shamble along regardless.

You are probably right about Chris. I’m just also a cynic and can see a scenario where he outlives us all.

 

[The Fool]

I mean, relative to everyone else, I suppose they were decently unhealthy. But they had jobs and children and accomplishments, and I'm sure their early years were much better for them, probably having had eaten real meals and got some decent exercise in. Chris has television. And while fast food can actually be decent for you if you live an active lifestyle, it can be poison if you don't.

 

[naught]

I had this stream open in one of many tabs Link to the stream when i heard the host @The WCT say there's a guest in chat.

 

[The Fool]

I had this stream open in one of many tabs Link to the stream when i heard the host @The WCT say there's a guest in chat.
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Now he's back to saying Lisa is president again.

I don't watch South Park anymore, anyone know if the Garrison thing was just one episode or is it persistent? If the latter, it's gonna be funny to see him rationalize it.

 

[naught]

Now he's back to saying Lisa is president again.

I don't watch South Park anymore, anyone know if the Garrison thing was just one episode or is it persistent? If the latter, it's gonna be funny to see him rationalize it.

Mr Garrison is president whereas Lisa is going to be President.
All due to a throw away line of dialogue "the first straight female President after Donald trump ruined the economy."
Link to the clip here

 

[Sir Wesley Tailpipe]

Now he's back to saying Lisa is president again.

I don't watch South Park anymore, anyone know if the Garrison thing was just one episode or is it persistent? If the latter, it's gonna be funny to see him rationalize it.

Garrison was still president in the Pandemic Special that came out last month,

 

[Fapcop]

I don’t know. Bob lived to be really old, and Barb is clinging to life like some gnarled, wide-eyed Joshua tree. Unhealthy lifestyle aside, those are some tenacious genes.

Well... Barb yes, but Bob living to a ripe old age was more of a triumph of modern medicine combined with the sheer obstinacy of an Internet lumberjack, who flat out refused to go gentle into that good night.

(At least until his son started trooning out. That probably sapped the last will to live out of poor Bob.)

Bob has like a quadruple bypass and heart attacks 2 or 3 times while still in his 50ies/60ies.


If Bob has been born 50 years earlier, he wouldn’t have lived past 60.


Now combine Bob’s history of heart failure with Chris unhealthy lifestyle (and hormones!) and you see why many doubt Chris will live past 55.

 

[ANobody]

Chris' expected lifespan isn't dependent solely on his genes. There's a lot of other factors at play too, such as depression, other mental health factors (isn't autism linked to shorter lifespans? I thought that was brought up before but I was probably too drunk to read it), and most importantly is that he doesn't have anyone to care for him when he gets older. I've heard people say his twig limbs are a result of muscle atrophy from autism, so who knows what else that could be affecting, like his heart. He does have high blood pressure, doesn't he?
He can't rely solely on Bob and Barb's lifespans (which actually aren't even that long to begin with, if we're counting Barb being on her way out), given his lifestyle, and, more importantly, how absolutely fucked his genes are since he was born to senior citizens.
I agree genes play a big role in it, but he's really playing with fire given what his life has been.

I just did some research and apparently the numbers on mortality in autism might be slightly skewed. Autism in itself does not lower natural life expectancy, however people in the autistic spectrum can be up to twice as likely to die in accidents like drowning or traumatic injury.

So statistically speaking it is likely that Chris will be found sprawled in the bathroom with his skull cracked open before his lard soaked heart performs its swan song.

 

[Fapcop]

I just did some research and apparently the numbers on mortality in autism might be slightly skewed. Autism in itself does not lower natural life expectancy, however people in the autistic spectrum can be up to twice as likely to die in accidents like drowning or traumatic injury.

So statistically speaking it is likely that Chris will be found sprawled in the bathroom with his skull cracked open before his lard soaked heart performs its swan song.

That sounds... Really weird.

Are you sure those statistics aren’t artificially twisted by those nonvocal super autists you hear about every now and then, escaping their pen?

And then get hit and killed by a truck or something, because they like machinery but are totally unable to function by themselves and have never left their house alone?


Speaking of autists in general, most of the ones I’ve seen live a pretty unhealthy lifestyle: Eating the same foods religiously, often fast food, and getting little in terms of exercise and socialization.

 

[Shabobus]

That sounds... Really weird.

Are you sure those statistics aren’t artificially twisted by those nonvocal super autists you hear about every now and then, escaping their pen?

And then get hit and killed by a truck or something, because they like machinery but are totally unable to function by themselves and have never left their house alone?

Some of it is due to more severely autistic people being at a higher risk of dying in accidents, like drowning. Chris has been in a few car accidents, but he's not autistic enough to just wander into a river. And people on the spectrum are more likely to have seizures, which can also lead to accidental injuries (I don't remember Chris having any history of seizures, though). The rest is because people with autism are more likely to commit suicide. Whether Chris will off himself after Barb dies and he's kicked out of his house is anyone's guess.

 

[ANobody]

That sounds... Really weird.

Are you sure those statistics aren’t artificially twisted by those nonvocal super autists you hear about every now and then, escaping their pen?

And then get hit and killed by a truck or something, because they like machinery but are totally unable to function by themselves and have never left their house alone?


Speaking of autists in general, most of the ones I’ve seen live a pretty unhealthy lifestyle: Eating the same foods religiously, often fast food, and getting little in terms of exercise and socialization.

Yeah i imagine most of those accidents must be with people further along the spectrum than chris, it's undeniable that while Chris might have some motor impairment its not as severe. I should've clarified that these statistics covered everyone in the autistic spectrum and hence the actual numbers might not be kosher for Chris's case

Some of it is due to more severely autistic people being at a higher risk of dying in accidents, like drowning. Chris has been in a few car accidents, but he's not autistic enough to just wander into a river. And people on the spectrum are more likely to have seizures, which can also lead to accidental injuries (I don't remember Chris having any history of seizures, though). The rest is because people with autism are more likely to commit suicide. Whether Chris will off himself after Barb dies and he's kicked out of his house is anyone's guess.

oh right i forgot to mention suicide! it's kind of weird actually. I found this study performed in Utah that found rates of suicide in autistic individuals were pretty close to gen pop up until 2012 when they rose dramatically, then settled again in 2017.

A 20-year study of suicide death in a statewide autism population - PubMed

This study examined suicide risk among individuals with autism spectrum disorder (ASD) in Utah over a 20-year period. Risk of suicide death in individuals with ASD was found to have increased over time and to be greater than in individuals without ASD between 2013 and 2017. Females with ASD were...

pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov

 

[Mariposa Electrique]

I just did some research and apparently the numbers on mortality in autism might be slightly skewed. Autism in itself does not lower natural life expectancy, however people in the autistic spectrum can be up to twice as likely to die in accidents like drowning or traumatic injury.

So statistically speaking it is likely that Chris will be found sprawled in the bathroom with his skull cracked open before his lard soaked heart performs its swan song.

That sounds... Really weird.

Are you sure those statistics aren’t artificially twisted by those nonvocal super autists you hear about every now and then, escaping their pen?

And then get hit and killed by a truck or something, because they like machinery but are totally unable to function by themselves and have never left their house alone?


Speaking of autists in general, most of the ones I’ve seen live a pretty unhealthy lifestyle: Eating the same foods religiously, often fast food, and getting little in terms of exercise and socialization.

Well, just remember the Keurig incident of failure.

 

[Seth MacFartman]

Unless his tugboat is in danger, he wouldn't care.

Tugboat is Imminent to Fall. Repeat. Tugboat is Imminent to Fall.

 

[Spastic Cologne]

he's not autistic enough to just wander into a river.

Well, you say that...

 

[ANobody]

Well, just remember the Keurig incident of failure.

I read that as Kegel and I was horrified for a second

 

[Argh My Cigar]

I read that as Kegel and I was horrified for a second

Where would it go? Other than his asshole, I mean.

God I hope not his “taint”

 

[Francine StripeCheer]

It's almost time....

 

[BScCollateral]

Wait

what?! You guys over the pond have to write your name on the fucking ballot? In Scotland you have the names of who you want to vote for, but it’s always anonymous, unless you say... wow

I really doubt anyone "signs their ballot." I had to sign a register of voters to show that I voted, but that isn't linked to the ballot.