- Joined
- Apr 17, 2020
So with only one more month left of 2020, are we going to get a top 10 videos of Lucas for this year? I'm curious what his most popular videos of this year were, come December
Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks
- Thread starter SpacePanther
- Start date
- Joined
- Aug 19, 2019
Out of a whole calendar year (and more) of Islamic content, it’s hard for me to single out one video that stands alone as the craziest, most cringeworthy hilarious video, much less a top 10
cigarettesalsa
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Aug 14, 2020
The video where he tells you how to talk to a girl but he has to have his eyes closed or he will pop a boner *my personal favorite of all time*
When that old lady told him she's sick of his talking
The handshake picture with Isaac
When he gets told "Shut the fuck up faggot" by a passerby in the park
When he's walking through the shelter and you hear another guy in the background mockingly "Hey! Where the women at?!"
The one days videos where he had like 3 restaurant meals in a few hours
The video of him eating off the cement
The post he made about making love to a woman under a bridge with the seagulls cawing in the background
When that old lady told him she's sick of his talking
The handshake picture with Isaac
When he gets told "Shut the fuck up faggot" by a passerby in the park
When he's walking through the shelter and you hear another guy in the background mockingly "Hey! Where the women at?!"
The one days videos where he had like 3 restaurant meals in a few hours
The video of him eating off the cement
The post he made about making love to a woman under a bridge with the seagulls cawing in the background
- Joined
- Aug 3, 2020
These are solid choices.
I can’t narrow my favorite to one vid but I think the series of vids where he has a total meltdown in public should be a top contender too: https://youtu.be/OLgz4wqEGlc
Check his old FB acct to see if he still has the videos:His Patreon has 20 videos, and I'm very curious as to whether he ended up posting them publicly because he only has two people subscribed and none at the $15 level to get the videos.
It's really, really, really tempting to drop the $15, snag all the videos that are probably just unlisted youtube videos from his channel, cancel, and toss those together in a compilation.
1. he's a "good guy" for not raping the girl sleeping on the sofa.
2. his "million dollar shirt" design -- he starts with "To all women, I haven't had sex in 5 yrs".
3. he's in his filthy kitchen talking about frozen soda.
4. where he looks doped up, singing something.
- Joined
- Aug 9, 2020
Not 10, and not in any order particularly, but these are the ones I feel like are peak Wern and worthy of being in the top 10.
The how to talk to women one where his eyes are closed so "guys don't get a boner"
The compilation vid klickitat made of his loud public "BITCHES AND THOTS!" rants
The peanut sauce chugging pavement tortilla one
That one where he just makes an awkward fisting motion
The one where he says "Shut the fuck up bigot where the women at where the party at" over and over and then later has some weird rant about BLM and Eddy Murphy
The clip where he looks like he's eating an invisible corn on the cob, looking full feral ragman
His "You breed stupidity" rap while walking down the streets which progresses into gutteral screaming in public
The "You're Republicans" video which ends in him shouting "YOU FUCKIN RED NECK NIGGER!!!" in public
Edit: grammar
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- Joined
- Oct 27, 2018
I am partial to "Hey, Baby Zoom." And his video where he performs his original hit "Love and Respect them Bitches.". Maybe those weren't this year?
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- Joined
- Aug 9, 2020
I used to know this bipolar guy that was morbidly alcoholic and would get drunk and cause public screaming scenes like Lucas does, only they were more intelligible, and someone recorded him a few times and showed him when he was sober and he freaked out cause he couldn't believe that was really him. I wonder how Lucas would react if someone showed him a compilation video of him being peak screaming incel. Any sane person seeing themself act like that would be horrified, but Lucas is just built different.
I mean even if he felt humbled by it he'd still continue, these kind of people don't change. For instance, bipolar drunk guy got a DUI on a riding lawn mower shortly after and eventually died from complications stemming from substance abuse. I imagine the Wern's antics will probably lead to his premature death also.
I mean even if he felt humbled by it he'd still continue, these kind of people don't change. For instance, bipolar drunk guy got a DUI on a riding lawn mower shortly after and eventually died from complications stemming from substance abuse. I imagine the Wern's antics will probably lead to his premature death also.
- Joined
- Dec 1, 2019
There appear to be a dozen or so left on FB.
The Patreon compilation is long enough as it is, so the FB one will be separate.
Edit: I'm going to apologize in advance for the shitty quality of literally everything he put on Facebook, and I don't just mean because of the dumbass content. The video quality looks like he took it on a flip phone from 2004 (I mean fair, some of those videos are from 2009) and the audio ranges from muffled and distorted to REALLY FUCKING LOUD and distorted.
There are some "music videos" he made that contain a fuckton of strobe effects too so if that's a thing that triggers seizures for you maybe just listen to the nonsense from a different tab.
While we wait on me picking through all his stupid FB videos and getting them put together, have this disgusting still from the kitchen of wherever he lived in 2014. The floor is even worse.
The Patreon Videos:
Edit: Fuck me (Lucas excluded).
Anyway on the FB one I stopped actually giving any fucks at all whether they were nicely grabbed without any 'up next' nonsense because half the videos worked with the extension I usually use and half didn't, so they're all out of order, and the audio and video quality on all but the most recent ones is trash because he was apparently recording on, like, a gameboy from the 90s with one of those clip on cameras.
Lots of shitty music he wrote himself, a rare glimpse into what he was like when he lived with other people who gave a fuck about him (Suzanne mostly), I left one video out because he's just bitching about 'it's your behavior' while focusing the clear camera on a girl who looks like she might be under 18 and is definitely passed out. If he's got you friended, you can still see it. It's just his usual bitching about women behaving in ways he personally disapproves of. That's the "look what a great guy I am for not raping this sleeping girl" video and just, ugh.
There are also a few videos from last year where he was recording in a club, and him quietly reading off some Scientific Breakthrough in a bathroom stall somewhere.
I also left out the "Date Me Millennials" one as he has that up on his first youtube channel.
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- Joined
- Apr 17, 2020
Kinda disappointed I never heard this, anyone know what the video is called, or if Klickitat has it uploaded?
One day when I get good at video editing, I'll try making a short compilation of his incel screaming, assuming I can remember the names of the best ones, and try finding some japanese theme to go over it. There's just so damn many videos he almost daily spammed it's hard to find them in his Instagram feed
One day when I get good at video editing, I'll try making a short compilation of his incel screaming, assuming I can remember the names of the best ones, and try finding some japanese theme to go over it. There's just so damn many videos he almost daily spammed it's hard to find them in his Instagram feed
WonderWino
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Dec 17, 2019
That one is one of his strangest videos, and one of the strongest indicators he's not entirely heterosexual
That said, for some reason it reminds me of that scene in the leprechaun films where the leprechaun tricks a guy into thinking some woman wants to kiss him, tells him to close his eyes and it turns out its just an illusion hiding the fact that the woman is really a high powered fan that he ends up sticking his head into. I can just imagine some crafty hobo playing a bait and switch with him and doing the same thing
and any of the videos where he gets told to shut the fuck up or trolled by random people and you see his eyes go wildly paranoid for a couple seconds as a result is high on my list
Also the broker B rap he did walking down the street having a psychotic episode was epic. Especially when he started getting into socialism and claiming 'your savior is a socialist! I am a socialist! you are a socialist! we are all socialists!' like he was about to lose his shit completely
I wonder how long it'll be before lucas loses what little shred of dignity he has left and just starts sitting outside the liquor store drinking bottles of scope and screeching about zoomers and flatbills incoherently for change
- Joined
- Oct 27, 2018
He would react one of two ways. Both ways would be him justifying his behavior. The first would be him stating that the bigots and socialists in name only caused these outbursts and how would you react if faced with such bigotry and hate? The second would be him stating that this was him doing his comedy routine.
Chelsea Girl
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Aug 24, 2020
Strong choice. LMAO the one where he screams in the street, wearing a Blue Hawaiian shirt, the levels of retardation are so high!!
- Joined
- Sep 2, 2020
Since he won't give me another Golden USB podcast I thought I should continue making Lucas content on my channel so I present you guys: TGUSBS Weekly Wern episode 1 it includes exclusive content from the catfish itself. I took Genosamuel's idea but for recent stuff. Let me know what you guys think!
Edit: Klickitat save the day once more with his latest upload
Edit: Klickitat save the day once more with his latest upload
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WonderWino
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Dec 17, 2019
If this is going to be a regular thing, it needs an intro theme song, possibly sung by sophie just to piss him off more:
lucas loves all the little children,
all the children of the world,
red and yellow, black and white,
all their telomeres attrite,
he really wants to fuck the little girls
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I don't agree with the guy who said all the calls the Freak got contributed to his "mental breakdown". He has "history" threatening suicide thinking it's going to get a girl on his dick. After getting kicked out of HOC for a month, it was either be out in the cold at night or head over to Deaconess.
- Joined
- Jun 25, 2013
Lucas has produced hundreds of hours of content. Most of it is as boring and awful as he is. Some of it is, however, very funny, and can help you pass some of the time before you die with a smirk on your face.
I assume you've all seen the notorious "Right Now" and "Chicken" videos. They're great, but there are other gems. Here's a few I enjoy.
I highly recommend "These guys are kinda being bitches about it" from February 2020. It's a characteristic example of Lucas's tendency to understand individuals based solely on assumed group characteristics (Gen Z is socialist, atheist men are all shy). His performance isn't very entertaining, but he makes the following amazing statements:
*Women flirt with Lucas by calling him "creep."
*He tells people he is an atheist so they will "respect" him. It seems people are constantly disrespecting Lucas. Must be because they don't know he's an atheist.
*All atheist men are shy, and atheist women are brash and loud, so atheist men may feel more comfortable with Christian women.
*Lucas is intimidated by young atheist women.
*Christians will respect you if you know the Bible. This increases your chance of "getting pussy" by 50%.
Any list of classic Lucas videos is incomplete without "While you were busy getting everything I deserve." An entertaining example of Lucas's grievances and frustrated lusts, it may as well be his statement of intent.
youtu.be
A historically significant video, and an amusing one, is "$1,000 and Dinner in Spokane." Lucas recorded it immediately upon being released from the psych ward in July of 2017. He was committed again shortly after posting it on YouTube. Anyway, behold medicated, soft spoken Lucas, fresh from months in a controlled, therapeutic environment. He's less creepy and no more lucid than he is today.
I am a fan of Lucas's poetry and lyrics. "Teenage Bondage" gives us a hint of Lucas's adolescent experience.
But check out his magnum (d)opus, "You breed stupidity."
It contains the timeless lines: "Gen Z, solidarity/ She about 18 and ready to breed/ Gen X, needing some sex/ all hail generation X ..."
Lucas once played with his tit, in an attempt to entertain. It worked, but for all the wrong reasons.
I assume you've all seen the notorious "Right Now" and "Chicken" videos. They're great, but there are other gems. Here's a few I enjoy.
I highly recommend "These guys are kinda being bitches about it" from February 2020. It's a characteristic example of Lucas's tendency to understand individuals based solely on assumed group characteristics (Gen Z is socialist, atheist men are all shy). His performance isn't very entertaining, but he makes the following amazing statements:
*Women flirt with Lucas by calling him "creep."
*He tells people he is an atheist so they will "respect" him. It seems people are constantly disrespecting Lucas. Must be because they don't know he's an atheist.
*All atheist men are shy, and atheist women are brash and loud, so atheist men may feel more comfortable with Christian women.
*Lucas is intimidated by young atheist women.
*Christians will respect you if you know the Bible. This increases your chance of "getting pussy" by 50%.
Any list of classic Lucas videos is incomplete without "While you were busy getting everything I deserve." An entertaining example of Lucas's grievances and frustrated lusts, it may as well be his statement of intent.
While You Were Busy Getting Everything I Deserve
By doing less, mind you, agephobes, grey beards and the young women who worship at the twin altars of youth entitlement bigotry and money.Conversation Our Ag...
youtu.be
A historically significant video, and an amusing one, is "$1,000 and Dinner in Spokane." Lucas recorded it immediately upon being released from the psych ward in July of 2017. He was committed again shortly after posting it on YouTube. Anyway, behold medicated, soft spoken Lucas, fresh from months in a controlled, therapeutic environment. He's less creepy and no more lucid than he is today.
I am a fan of Lucas's poetry and lyrics. "Teenage Bondage" gives us a hint of Lucas's adolescent experience.
But check out his magnum (d)opus, "You breed stupidity."
It contains the timeless lines: "Gen Z, solidarity/ She about 18 and ready to breed/ Gen X, needing some sex/ all hail generation X ..."
Lucas once played with his tit, in an attempt to entertain. It worked, but for all the wrong reasons.
- Joined
- Dec 1, 2019
Yooooo, guess who's got the actual music video that Lucas made for Teenage Bondage (as well as a few others) uploading to the tubes of you?I am a fan of Lucas's poetry and lyrics. "Teenage Bondage" gives us a hint of Lucas's adolescent experience.
If you thought the songs were bad, please consider the fact that Lucas made music videos to go with most of them. A lot of movie clips, he discovered some probably meant for creating screensavers program to do 'animation' in one and had the lyrics scrolling on the screen, and it's all so very very 2009/2010 emo wannabe nonsense.
The video for his cover of Hit The Road Jack is almost sad as he's just doing it to the webcam and it was done while he was still with Suzanne. She came in from the other room and gave him the biggest hug, laughing and swaying with him while he continued to sing out of key and you could see for a few seconds there that Lucas was genuinely happy (also high af I think). For a split second he seemed like just a normal guy being silly with his girlfriend.
But, we all know how that turned out and what he was like when there wasn't someone recording.
Here are the Facebook videos, minus the three I mention in the description of the video.
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- Joined
- Jul 21, 2015
Something funny: at the end of Klickitat 's patreon exclusive video, Lucas repeats something he'd said before, when he equates time with space.
I mean, he literally says that because objects in the universe aren't on top of each other, because there's physical distance between them, then that means that his intergenerational pattern is the only way, it's reinforced by the pattern of the cosmos, because the objects came into being at different times in different spaces, therefore little girls should fuck Lucas?
Just like with many things he says, he never even bothers to consider the Corollary.
So the only way the universe could be okay with people sleeping with their OWN age group, as a reverse postulate of what he's suggesting here, would be for every physical entity in the universe, every planet, every Moon, every asteroid, every Star, to occupy the same physical space, in other words, to all be on top of each other. So that's the only evidence Lucas would take to not be a pedophile.... If the universe were one black hole of super-concentrated matter layered on top of each other.
That is some deep pedoscience, baby.
I mean, he literally says that because objects in the universe aren't on top of each other, because there's physical distance between them, then that means that his intergenerational pattern is the only way, it's reinforced by the pattern of the cosmos, because the objects came into being at different times in different spaces, therefore little girls should fuck Lucas?
Just like with many things he says, he never even bothers to consider the Corollary.
So the only way the universe could be okay with people sleeping with their OWN age group, as a reverse postulate of what he's suggesting here, would be for every physical entity in the universe, every planet, every Moon, every asteroid, every Star, to occupy the same physical space, in other words, to all be on top of each other. So that's the only evidence Lucas would take to not be a pedophile.... If the universe were one black hole of super-concentrated matter layered on top of each other.
That is some deep pedoscience, baby.
- Joined
- Feb 26, 2016
My favorite is still when Lucas tried to fight Daniel in the parking lot of a mental health facility.