Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

[Sevan Vosgi]

The geotag on the YT video is a nice touch.

 

[mothman96]

The comment:

 

[GleamingTheQ-Bert]

he has always thought ALL gorillas become silverbacks, that it just happens with age. he has had it explained to him thats for the alpha of the group. the protector, provider of the whole troop (do gorillas use troop?) lucas holds on to the idea theyre just old so he doesnt have to admit he brings absolutely nothin positive to any relationship

Don't know about troop, but strangely enough, a group of balding, impotent male gorillas that masturbate furiously while crying and are abandoned by their family is known as a "Wern".

 

[Narr Then]

The comment:

View attachment 1809296

He...knows that men can't have babies, doesn't he...

 

[Rescuetoast]

Finally listened to that phone call. Was Roy military? Lotta “sirs” in there.

 

[mothman96]

He...knows that men can't have babies, doesn't he...

You don't know the story of Jason Perva (of Olympia) and Lucas?

 

[GleamingTheQ-Bert]

View attachment 1809185

View attachment 1809186

Short and sweet. Lucas apparently already knocked off of his KFC high.

He complains multiple times that he hasn't showered in 2 weeks, and now that he's got a hotel room, he'd rather make these stupid videos than, oh I don't know, maybe take a shower?

 

[denysdemontfort]

He complains multiple times that he hasn't showered in 2 weeks, and now that he's got a hotel room, he'd rather make these stupid videos than, oh I don't know, maybe take a shower?

It looks like he did, with the wet hair in those videos. Then again 2 weeks of lard sweat can also give that effect. Lucas always looks dingy anyway.

 

[WonderWino]

Uploading this for y'all before I even watch it -- but looks like someone got him a Motel 6 room so I'm sure he'll be peak annoying "happy" rambling Lucas.

View attachment 1809118

The only good thing about lucas getting a room and food is he admitted it wasn't his family that did it. and the way hes going off its clear he expects this to be a regular thing. nobody is going to support him like this on a regular basis. they couldn't even if they wanted to, its not feasible and he'll piss them off for demanding more sooner or later anyway

and lucas couldn't have sounded more like one of those guys on to catch a predator if he tried. it was eerie how similar he talked to them. Even down to the 'I was just here to talk and make friends with her sir' and its not surprising he realized being nice and cooperative wasn't getting him off the hook and started resorting to threats and insults. Even threatening to call the FBI to report the 'dad' for a hate crime....for saying its inappropriate for lucas to cross state lines to meet a 16 year old in a hotel room. I'm sure that would go over real well for lucas. He would essentially be calling the FBI on himself and busting himself in that scenario. It doesn't help lucas that he made threats and lied about his parents being powerful and having bounty hunters and all that either. That could be taken as a legit threat

It really makes me wonder how he'd behave if he ever does finally get busted as a pedo. If he acts like he did in the video with cops that are interrogating him for a similar but real situation, lucas would make things a metric shit ton worse for himself and probably get additional charges over it

 

[Narr Then]

You don't know the story of Jason Perva (of Olympia) and Lucas?

I do not. I've read a fair bit previously, but skipped lots too.
If you'd be so kind, I'm all ears.
I mean eyes.
You know what I mean.

 

[Wernology]

I do not. I've read a fair bit previously, but skipped lots too.
If you'd be so kind, I'm all ears.
I mean eyes.
You know what I mean.

The short, short version: Lucas is rumored to have sucked Jason Perva off because he thought he'd get a shot at having sex with a woman if he did.

Lucas only half heartedly denies that this happened and quickly tries to change the topic if it comes up (pun intended).

 

[Narr Then]

The short, short version: Lucas is rumored to have sucked Jason Perva off because he thought he'd get a shot at having sex with a woman if he did.

Lucas only half heartedly denies that this happened and quickly tries to change the topic if it comes up (pun intended).

Weird how these cows have so much in common isn't it. Like there's a blueprint somewhere.
Also, Perva. *snickers*

 

[mothman96]

I do not. I've read a fair bit previously, but skipped lots too.
If you'd be so kind, I'm all ears.
I mean eyes.
You know what I mean.

It's in that video where Daniel (Lucas's ex-roommate) and Lucas are "fighting". In the video Daniel says Lucas sucked off Jason Perva. In the comment the "in exchange for your services" is in reference to the "service" Lucas gave Jason. I don't think the Jason Perva in the comment is the real Perva.

 

[Narr Then]

It's in that video where Daniel (Lucas's ex-roommate) and Lucas are "fighting". In the video Daniel says Lucas sucked off Jason Perva. In the comment the "in exchange for your services" is in reference to the "service" Lucas gave Jason. I don't think the Jason Perva in the comment is the real Perva.

Ahh got ya. I'll have to rewatch that, I missed that part.
It can be fucking hard work translating murican tard screeching sometimes mind. Our own are tricky enough.

 

[Sevan Vosgi]

Ahh got ya. I'll have to rewatch that, I missed that part.
It can be fucking hard work translating murican tard screeching sometimes mind. Our own are tricky enough.

Savor your relative innocence while you can. I wish I didn't know all this lore.

 

[Poop Shoot]

I wish I didn't know all this lore.

Lies. You love this shit just as much as the rest of us.

 

[Narr Then]

The only good thing about lucas getting a room and food is he admitted it wasn't his family that did it. and the way hes going off its clear he expects this to be a regular thing. nobody is going to support him like this on a regular basis. they couldn't even if they wanted to, its not feasible and he'll piss them off for demanding more sooner or later anyway

and lucas couldn't have sounded more like one of those guys on to catch a predator if he tried. it was eerie how similar he talked to them. Even down to the 'I was just here to talk and make friends with her sir' and its not surprising he realized being nice and cooperative wasn't getting him off the hook and started resorting to threats and insults. Even threatening to call the FBI to report the 'dad' for a hate crime....for saying its inappropriate for lucas to cross state lines to meet a 16 year old in a hotel room. I'm sure that would go over real well for lucas. He would essentially be calling the FBI on himself and busting himself in that scenario. It doesn't help lucas that he made threats and lied about his parents being powerful and having bounty hunters and all that either. That could be taken as a legit threat

It really makes me wonder how he'd behave if he ever does finally get busted as a pedo. If he acts like he did in the video with cops that are interrogating him for a similar but real situation, lucas would make things a metric shit ton worse for himself and probably get additional charges over it

Finally managed to play it properly, and hooooly fuckety fuck

Parts of it reminded me a lot of the nonce catching groups here...they're always full of bravado at first, thinking that if they just say that they thought she was 18 they'll get off a 'oh, OK, fair enough, well we'll say no more about it then, off y'pop'.

Lol no. That's not how it works.

Here tho, they start reading out printoffs from the chat logs showing that here, here and here, they tell them that they're 13 or whatever (yes I know, a bit different to this scenario). And you can just see them buckle . You can literally see the cogs turning as they consider, then reject, various excuses that they've already thought of before turning up at the meet, because they know what they're doing is wrong, they've planned for what to say if they get caught, and they're convinced that their reasoning is watertight.

It's fucking glorious.

I loved the' fat sweaty hobo' line BTW, that was inspired

Ahh, there's so much more to comment on, but I'll leave it there.

Good work fellas

 

[teleméres69]

I mean, we all know how much of a monstrous pedophile/predator Lucas is. Is anyone surprised he still behaves this way at 41 after being catfished like that?

YIKES

For someone who is in his position and just got catfished to an extreme level he sure is pushy and aggressive in trying to get her attention. That exchange screams predatory behavior

and holy shit he actually said 'the best thing you can do right now is to get into a relationship with a much more mature and affectionate silverback male'

Jesus fucking christ. He actually called himself a 'silverback male' and literally compared himself to an old, alpha gorilla. and mature? Where he hell has he been for the past few days? He literally just got catfished to LA with no money, had to have 2 people feed him and get him a ticket back or he'd have been fucked and is spending christmas in a bus station in freezing weather cause even his own parents have had enough of him and refuse to speak to him because of his behavior

and he calls himself mature. a delusional, manipulative, predatory, compulsive liar is what he is. and look at how he reacts to being told posting creepy, offensive pictures of a woman if off putting to a woman. It has nothing to do with the size of her tits. He really, really doesn't get it

That said, I bet his eyes lit up when she said she was just of a relationship cause to lucas that screams vulnerable and desperate just like he is himself and he thinks its someone he can much more easily manipulate into giving him what he wants. He couldn't be a more stereotypical predator if he tried

If this woman is another catfish, lucas really has completely lost his mind and/or has become so utterly desperate in his situation hes literally trying to go after everything female even after what just happened to him. If he keeps up that kind of moronic behavior sooner or later hes going to end up getting the attention of some crackpot craigslist killer type and disappear, and nobody but us will give a shit

Yeah, Lucas is a true monster. Hopefully this thread, along with the videos on YouTube, manage to let at least some in the Washington state to know to avoid Lucas and not let him get in a position where he can rape them

Christonnabike

Before I actually signed up, when I saw how scared he was and that he was heading for skid row, I was legitimately concerned for him, as I would be for any human being who's as tapped as he is.

But fuck me, there's asking for it, then there's this. Unfuckingreal.

"I haven't showered because I was trying to do the right thing"
Lol fuck off Lucas. You haven't showered because you're a filthy creep who feels entitled to women half your age even when you make no effort to make yourself not repulsive. You got the boot for trying to blackmail people into sex, not that they had anything for you to blackmail them with, you're just a deranged predator who shot yourself in the foot
"Am I a bad looking guy?"
Yes, you're very ugly Lucas. Hence nobody wants you and you're gonna die alone Lucas
I'm glad Lucas has reminded us this Christmas why nobody, including his own family, likes him irl. He really has no redeeming qualities and it will be objectively good when he finally dies

Uploading this for y'all before I even watch it -- but looks like someone got him a Motel 6 room so I'm sure he'll be peak annoying "happy" rambling Lucas.

View attachment 1809118

Pedophiles sadly take care of their own. Though there is also the potential he thinks he can copy Goldaor. I like the hope it's the latter with a lot of these people

So the guy who enables Predators (payed for the motel 6 room and KFC meal) is Nathan Hayskins (sp). Is that name familiar to anyone?.
Birds of a feather stick together.

Almost like the left and right hate pedophiles like you Lucas

"Alt-Right Feminazi Uppity-Liberal Trumptists"

No Lucas, I think that's because people of all sides of the spectrum agree that you fucking suck.

Amazing, but not surprising, how quickly he tries to turn this around to him being the victim, not the kid he clearly tried to groom into sex, that he admitted was the expectation. Nobody cares that teens don't want you Lucas, agephobia is not a hate crime, nor is it a crime. What is a crime is sexual harassment and you trying to groom minors. This is why your parents want nothing to do with you Lucas. They know you're a broken schizo fiend, and there is no fixing you so your family is just cutting you off and letting nature take its course as you freeze on the streets

He's definitely stalking my channel, he commented within 5 minutes.

Anyway:

DISCLAIMER on this video: @Jeremiah the Bullfrog & @Goldaor had nothing to do with catfishing Lucas to LA.

This call was made by Jeremiah AFTER Lucas was already at the Ritz.

Neither Jeremiah, Goldaor, or I had anything to do with catfishing Lucas to Los Angeles or with getting him a bus ticket back to Spokane. Lucas & SOFALAW got it wrong. I have no idea who the catfish was.

You may recognize Jeremiah from the final Golden USB Podcast episode as the guest who interviewed Lucas. If you haven't listened to it, you absolutely should, it's hilarious both because it's over an hour of Lucas constantly raging and because Jeremiah has a very distinct voice and it's amazing that Lucas didn't immediately recognize it: https://youtu.be/8TKCPbPCH9E

There is a shorter call as well, but we’ll let Lucas stew and panic for awhile. Gotta leave him something for Christmas morning!


This is TCAP level hilarity, especially to see how submissive he gets and how FAST--then goes into panicked screaming about how his parents are bounty hunters and friends with cops and how "Mia's dad" is going to be arrested and go to jail for being a bigot.

He barely ever showered when he was living in Pioneer. Only ever did when people online called him out and told him to. Even when he isn't homeless he has the hygiene of the dirtiest hobo you could find on skid row

He complains multiple times that he hasn't showered in 2 weeks, and now that he's got a hotel room, he'd rather make these stupid videos than, oh I don't know, maybe take a shower?

Lucas is a pussy when it comes to authority. He'd sit the fuck down and try to spin several bullshit stories while pissing himself being told he's going to jail since the officers would be able to right through his act

The only good thing about lucas getting a room and food is he admitted it wasn't his family that did it. and the way hes going off its clear he expects this to be a regular thing. nobody is going to support him like this on a regular basis. they couldn't even if they wanted to, its not feasible and he'll piss them off for demanding more sooner or later anyway

and lucas couldn't have sounded more like one of those guys on to catch a predator if he tried. it was eerie how similar he talked to them. Even down to the 'I was just here to talk and make friends with her sir' and its not surprising he realized being nice and cooperative wasn't getting him off the hook and started resorting to threats and insults. Even threatening to call the FBI to report the 'dad' for a hate crime....for saying its inappropriate for lucas to cross state lines to meet a 16 year old in a hotel room. I'm sure that would go over real well for lucas. He would essentially be calling the FBI on himself and busting himself in that scenario. It doesn't help lucas that he made threats and lied about his parents being powerful and having bounty hunters and all that either. That could be taken as a legit threat

It really makes me wonder how he'd behave if he ever does finally get busted as a pedo. If he acts like he did in the video with cops that are interrogating him for a similar but real situation, lucas would make things a metric shit ton worse for himself and probably get additional charges over it

Lucas doesn't plan, he just regurgitates the same excuses he tells himself on a daily basis to not open his wrists with that box cutter. It was hilarious how textbook predator Lucas was the entire exchange though. The real Christmas gift should have been someone paying Hansen for another video on Lucas though

Finally managed to play it properly, and hooooly fuckety fuck

Parts of it reminded me a lot of the nonce catching groups here...they're always full of bravado at first, thinking that if they just say that they thought she was 18 they'll get off a 'oh, OK, fair enough, well we'll say no more about it then, off y'pop'.

Lol no. That's not how it works.

Here tho, they start reading out printoffs from the chat logs showing that here, here and here, they tell them that they're 13 or whatever (yes I know, a bit different to this scenario). And you can just see them buckle . You can literally see the cogs turning as they consider, then reject, various excuses that they've already thought of before turning up at the meet, because they know what they're doing is wrong, they've planned for what to say if they get caught, and they're convinced that their reasoning is watertight.

It's fucking glorious.

I loved the' fat sweaty hobo' line BTW, that was inspired

Ahh, there's so much more to comment on, but I'll leave it there.

Good work fellas

 

[IceQueen]

Okay I was at a Christmas Eve dinner (bc I’m, ya know, a normal member of society) and I missed like 6 new pages of discussion here that I cba to go through right now so I’m sorry if I’m way late to the party on this but uh... I can’t fucking believe that not only did someone pay to get him back to Spokane, but at least 3 different people hooked him up with food (and he was pissed in Sacramento bc even though someone got him a MEAL of chow mein, he didn’t get his SECOND meal from a different person bc GrubHub wasn’t fast enough), and now it appears that he is indeed at a motel in Spokane.

Lucas is a very special and VERY stupid case but y’all enablers are 1000% a huge part of the reason he never actually learns. Lucas has proven to be smarter or at least able to fake being smarter and more resourceful than we give him credit for and I guarantee that if he had even just had to spend the bus ride back to Spokane hungry, he would have learned a MODICUM more from this endeavor than he did. But nah, people all over the place have to keep enabling this predator.

 

[geovonnigeovonni]

Okay I was at a Christmas Eve dinner (bc I’m, ya know, a normal member of society) and I missed like 6 new pages of discussion here that I cba to go through right now so I’m sorry if I’m way late to the party on this but uh... I can’t fucking believe that not only did someone pay to get him back to Spokane, but at least 3 different people hooked him up with food (and he was pissed in Sacramento bc even though someone got him a MEAL of chow mein, he didn’t get his SECOND meal from a different person bc GrubHub wasn’t fast enough), and now it appears that he is indeed at a motel in Spokane.

Lucas is a very special and VERY stupid case but y’all enablers are 1000% a huge part of the reason he never actually learns. Lucas has proven to be smarter or at least able to fake being smarter and more resourceful than we give him credit for and I guarantee that if he had even just had to spend the bus ride back to Spokane hungry, he would have learned a MODICUM more from this endeavor than he did. But nah, people all over the place have to keep enabling this predator.

How could you not want to shoot yourself for being so pitied?