Tess Holliday / Ryann Maegen Hoven - Beached Landwhale model, Body positive and social justice snacktivist, and gigantic fraud

[Voivode]

Why do they pull on panties up to the armpits? I genuinely don't understand the desired result here.
Also how strange to see her thighs (but not calves, lol) closed.

Tbf for a lot of women there’s underwear designed to be worn like that to accentuate the waist and create an illusion that the hips are wider which you can see with Kendall.

But as we can see with Tess, the underwear may have had this similar design but we wouldn’t know because either way it’s stretched to the limit over her gunt and because she doesn’t have any waist definition in the slightest that illusion doesn’t even work, she just looks like she’s hiked up her undies and it’s cutting into her which as we can clearly see does not make a waist.

 

[Oscar Winner]

Tbf for a lot of women there’s underwear designed to be worn like that to accentuate the waist and create an illusion that the hips are wider which you can see with Kendall.

But as we can see with Tess, the underwear may have had this similar design but we wouldn’t know because either way it’s stretched to the limit over her gunt and because she doesn’t have any waist definition in the slightest that illusion doesn’t even work, she just looks like she’s hiked up her undies and it’s cutting into her which as we can clearly see does not make a waist.

I know this is completely irrelevant, but it's bothering the fuck out of me that one side is way higher than the other. It's like everything she does is sloppily thrown together with zero attention to detail.

 

[Pollybock]

Her knees are concave, like they look like the joint works backwards. That’s not flexibility, that’s some fucked up damage.

 

[Umaibae]

This must be a highlighter, I’m pretty fucking sure. For some reason her fat brain thinks it resembles the desirable “dewy” look. She looks ridiculous in the pics, but imagine seeing that irl.

It is highlighter. I know it’s fun to say she has greasy skin, but she overuses highlighter like a 15 year-old girl.

If you’re over 25 and using highlighter, you need to reevaluate your life decisions. It looks silly on grown-ass women (and, if you’ve ever attempted to use it, you’d notice it tends to sit in every pore or wrinkle and ages you to hell — hence why it only looks good on baby smooth Gen Z influencer skin.)

Forgot to mention before: This new photo is obviously stretched, because the podcast video shows us how wide she is (and she is not this tall). I now comfortably believe she is around 350-380lbs easily.

I hope someone calls her out on the necks phrase soon

 

[Cynar]

Even Tess has to realize that her daily cake habit has destroyed her face and body to the point that no one will hire her as a legit model anymore, and her only source of income from now on is sitting on cakes for weirdos with cash.

One thing we've seen watching gargantuan "models" like Tess (and the wannabe models like Anna "Blue Steel Retard Face" O'Brien): they act like they're representing some special house-sized demographic, which is just their natural state/"set point"/HAES/whatever. I could possibly buy it (wouldn't like it, but could buy it) except for one thing: you know what models don't do? Balloon their bodies to the point that they size out of any and all available sizes in 99% of clothing lines.

Tess simply does not actually fit into anything. And she can barely walk. And is only getting worse. This is not what a professional model does. They might get starved, strung out, and stupid, but a model can still walk and put a shirt on without slitting it up the back. Tess is not a big gorl who is simply showing the world that she can model with the best of them, just in bigger sizes. She's a disaster who is very publicly getting enormously fat because she has a severe eating disorder. EmPoWeRmEnT, Y'aLL

There’s significant overlap in the modeling and escorting world, nobody wants to admit it though.

WORD. I'm always amused by the 'hmmmm are we rilly sure Tess is actually escorting tho?' lol yes

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Tess mocking another woman because she's got an unusual body which she's also severely photoshopped. Classy, and not at all wildly hypocritical /sneed

This must be a highlighter, I’m pretty fucking sure.

It is highlighter. I know it’s fun to say she has greasy skin, but she overuses highlighter like a 15 year-old girl.

Yes, it's for sure highlighter and product, I don't think people actually think she's oozing oil (that's not why I posted it, anyway). That's almost what makes it even worse. She thinks this looks GOOD and does it on purpose. "I'm a nearly immobile oiled up Christmas ham! Influencer y'all!"

 

[bloomingcactus]

She posted a “clear” pic since the other was blurry: View attachment 1975188

This is gross but why is she bothering to wear underwear? You can't see anything with her panniculus in the way.

 

[Oscar Winner]

This is gross but why is she bothering to wear underwear? You can't see anything with her panniculus in the way.

To accentuate her waist

 

[GrouchiCorn]

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That moment when you're so fucking fat, even the photo backdrop has stretch marks

 

[Reepicheep]

 

[Haesindang Park]

She reposted the photo and added to the caption.
View attachment 1975368

I believe there was a post from someone from South Africa saying how the fat acceptance and HAES movement is an insult to starving children and third world countries where they said that they had a teacher who was fat but many of their classmates were starving and skinny.

Also, if I remember right, the state of Michigan has a law against discriminating people from employers due to their weight. I don't know what the result of that was but last time I checked, the state of Michigan is not obligated to provide every morbidly obese person a reinforced mobility scooter. Me thinks it's clear what Tess actually wants hence the fat acceptance and HAES movement claiming to be allies for disability rights when in reality, they just want mobility scooters.

 

[The Faggot of the Opera]

She reposted the photo and added to the caption.
View attachment 1975368

Working too damn hard to not show this body off? I guess scarfing down a cake on the hour every hour is hard work.

 

[Cheesegirl78]

It is highlighter. I know it’s fun to say she has greasy skin, but she overuses highlighter like a 15 year-old girl.

If you’re over 25 and using highlighter, you need to reevaluate your life decisions. It looks silly on grown-ass women (and, if you’ve ever attempted to use it, you’d notice it tends to sit in every pore or wrinkle and ages you to hell — hence why it only looks good on baby smooth Gen Z influencer skin.)

Forgot to mention before: This new photo is obviously stretched, because the podcast video shows us how wide she is (and she is not this tall). I now comfortably believe she is around 350-380lbs easily.

I hope someone calls her out on the necks phrase soon

(Cheesegirl hides her pretty pink shimmery highlighter behind her 57 year old back and goes to the Shame Corner.)

 

[maggots]

Post includes an exercise gif.

She surprisingly didn't use the clown emoji.
Sorry if the formatting is horrible on this post.

 

[Cynar]

Post includes an exercise gif.
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She surprisingly didn't use the clown emoji.
Sorry if the formatting is horrible on this post.

Great job, Tess! Now do a single jumping jack and make a little gif of that, too, then claim you do it for 20 hours straight!
Gorl we all saw you lying around like a sack of pudding while someone much more nimble manipulated your limbs and dodged your farts.

 

[Crepidodera fulvicornis]

Post includes an exercise gif.
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She surprisingly didn't use the clown emoji.
Sorry if the formatting is horrible on this post.

As a Pilates trainer - this is a joke. The whole point is physiologically “correct” (English hard) movements. Like, a knee is supposed to *bend in one plane. When she's beating her feet (and not heels), her knees forced to bend in different plane, because she can't bring her thighs together.
Whatever she's doing, it's not a pilates in any way.
Also beetroot face.

 

[Local Fed]

Post includes an exercise gif.
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She surprisingly didn't use the clown emoji.
Sorry if the formatting is horrible on this post.

Imagine calling anyone embarrassing when you look like a 350lb marshmallow Peep that's barely willing your leg to get up that high while the person filming does so from 20 feet away as to get your whole body in frame and not be knocked out by the plumes of vaginal stench.

 

[Water-T]

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

No one fucking believes you, Tess. Flailing on the floor for a few seconds means diddly squat.

Notice how she had to speed it up, because the time and effort it take for her to lift her trotters a few times would actually take over an hour.

Not that any of this matters. Based on the amount of candy, cakes, ice cream, cakes, sugary coffee creamers, cakes, and cakes she's eaten in a weekend, Tess could do hot pilates for 3 hours straight and not come close to burning off all the fat, carbs, and calories she imbibed in such a short period.

Tess puts more effort into avoiding being a MAWM, stuffing her face, woke Tweeting, and pretending to exercise to "show up the haters" than actually exercising.

 

[Constellationzero]

Post includes an exercise gif.
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She surprisingly didn't use the clown emoji.
Sorry if the formatting is horrible on this post.

Uhhh, my God... Imagine the FUCKING SMELL in that studio. I now have a persistent phantom whiff of feet, day old farts, unwiped ass, stank ass puss, some kind of Sardinian cheese, and BO.

I guess if by strong bodies Ryann meant this, well, I guess she'd be right.

 

[JambledUpWords]

 

[Brittnay Matthews]

Which one is it Tess?
She's such a pickme girl, why tag Kendall and diss her? Tess's doing the same thing she's doing: promoting a toxic lifestyle within the fashion industry with several layers of heavy shoop. Except kendall is posting her shit and getting payed while tess and her crew cry over it while stuffing their faces. Just pathetic
And I don't get the sudden melt down, this shit happened weeks ago, she's so late.