Tess Holliday / Ryann Maegen Hoven - Beached Landwhale model, Body positive and social justice snacktivist, and gigantic fraud

How much does Ryann weigh?

  • 300-350lbs (Panda Bear)

    Votes: 26 1.0%
  • 350-400lbs (Bull Caribou)

    Votes: 146 5.5%
  • 400-450lbs (Heart of a Blue Whale)

    Votes: 379 14.2%
  • 450-500lbs (Pigmy Hippo)

    Votes: 545 20.5%
  • 500-550lbs (Domestic Pig)

    Votes: 394 14.8%
  • 550-600lbs (Baby Grand Piano)

    Votes: 318 12.0%
  • 600-650lbs (Vending Machine)

    Votes: 192 7.2%
  • 650+ (A Fucking Planet)

    Votes: 661 24.8%

  • Total voters
    2,661
Hey Tess how about those POC small business owners, BLM region managers, trans-activists? I would imagine any of those would be more groundbreaking to have on your stupid show, than some bitch who waxes your smelly hole.
The only groundbreaking Tess is familiar with is when her massive body breaks something. I’m also sure that at this point her walking generates some seismic activity.

It’s pretty clear that in her mind, anything she does is groundbreaking therefore her content is groundbreaking. As if there aren’t numerous fat girls who haven’t created podcasts. Her third podcast can have her barista who defended her online or maybe the postmates driver who drops off her numerous food runs throughout the day. Then her guests can just serve to inflate Tess’ massive ego.
 
Update on the Slumber Party’s Youtube!

82D34FBE-C799-4355-8362-DA0C4FC2ADCF.jpeg

882 views :story: The numbers on other streaming platforms are probably similar.


Comments: 12 -> shown only 9; nothing new I think
 
God, she's so fucking full of herself.
5031E372-1F14-4412-A2D4-9E34FAE80F71.jpeg
No Tess, your face is beside the words Landwhale, Fat, Obese, Morbidly Obese, Fat Fetish Escort, Shitty Mother, Shitty Wife, Grifter, Fat, Fucking Enormous, Liar, Lazy...did I miss any?
 
Last edited by a moderator:
That older gentlemen probably thought. Fuck me. She is actually going to die from effort. Her gunt is so big she can't actually reach near her car. If she collapses and with the petrol - she is a complete fire hazard. And if not.... no one is going to be able to climb her body to get to the pumps. So best help oil slick face with ExxonMobil body over there move on. I ain't got time for questioning of a DOA of a landwhale.
 
Initially saw this, grimaced, and moved along. Now to my dismay returning for study. If you can look at this picture for more than a fraction of a second (I recommend scientific detachment and not staring directly at the black hole) you’ll start to notice how very ODD it all is.

Her feet, toes buried in the sand, are clownishly tiny. She doesn’t have cankles, her miniature feet just attach to her legs, the calf hard and taught, ballooning smoothly just above the foot. Her calves are the only body part that still approximate their human shape. This leads to another wave of shock when you realize, thanks to mini-foot, that they are HUGE and straining with fat like everything else, but hard and shiny like a stuffed sausage. Oh god, I looked up her shoe size. That itty bitty baby foot is a size 8.5. The feet are big too, it’s all just an optical illusion.

Moving up her thigh, we have the horrifying grey flappy skin that only saw the sun this day, to be photographed.

What is truly perplexing is her bubble ass. Despite every spot on her body sporting at least six inches of visceral fat, her butt kept some semblance of definition. I’ve noticed with deathfats of her caliber, a flattened shelf ass forms from sitting constantly, almost like carrying around a portable bean bag. Flat on the bottom, pillowing around from that spot of pressure to almost support and lay back on, the fat collecting in the hips, a bar of fat above the butt, and the thighs. She doesn’t have this to the same degree. I think she is shaped like this from sitting on her legs, sort of sitting forward, and resting her weight on her stomach. Almost like laying her belly on her lap and hugging it. That plus occasionally deadlifting 300 pounds, holding it, and walking around holding it while in heels and a corset is gonna engage her gluteal muscles.

combine eternally accelerating gaining with her glam supah moddle jawb keeping her (limited) mobility has crafted this logic defying spherical ham.

her legs and butt being the only muscles she uses, the rest of her body is laden with jiggly fat in hanging bags. Thank whatever God you pray to that her stomachs are not visible.
 
That older gentlemen probably thought. Fuck me. She is actually going to die from effort. Her gunt is so big she can't actually reach near her car. If she collapses and with the petrol - she is a complete fire hazard. And if not.... no one is going to be able to climb her body to get to the pumps. So best help oil slick face with ExxonMobil body over there move on. I ain't got time for questioning of a DOA of a landwhale.
He didn’t ask her if she was single. He more than likely asked her, “Are you alone?”

He was asking where her wrangler was. Granddaddy did NOT wanna bust a hip spelunking for her waxed hole.
 
God, she's so fucking full of herself.
View attachment 1997177
No Tess, your face is beside the words Landwhale, Fat, Obese, Morbidly Obese, Fat Fetish Escort, Shitty Mother, Shitty Wife, Grifter, Fat, Fucking Enormous, Liar, Lazy...did I miss any?
Farter & Eater of Cakes
 
She reposted this exercise vid on her stories this afternoon and passed it off like it was today's workout. And then posted this incredibly self centered flabletics idiocy.

Lel! Does the heart behind her really say cheeseburger?! :story:

Screenshot_20210315-093547_Brave.jpg

Even graffiti is telling Tess, lol, fat.

Edit : even better.... it actually says cheeseburger luvs you .... oh if only walls could talk.... and woof look at that face...

Screenshot_20210315-094111_Brave.jpg
 
Last edited:
Hulthy, but big... View attachment 1998636
View attachment 1998637
Fits like a glove... :cryblood:
View attachment 1998638
View attachment 1998641
Edit. Oh dear god, what is going on with her armfupa? Does her armfupa have a fupa?
View attachment 1998663
Petty as fuck, but she's laying on her ass in that exercise, and not on a hip. That way she just kicks air, instead of lifting her whole ginormous leg from the heel to the buttock.
I know her trainer gave up long before the start, but can't you at least pretend, for a photo?

She put arm behind her head, but there is no armpit to be seen. No wonder she shaves once in a lifetime.
 
Back