Careercow Robert Chipman / Bob / Moviebob / "Movieblob" - Middle-Aged Consoomer, CWC with a Thesaurus, Ardent Male Feminist and Superior Futurist, the Twice-Fired, the Mario-Worshipper, publicly dismantled by Hot Dog Girl, now a diabetic

[Flexo]

On a practical level, how does an audience pay attention to 10 or 12 major story arcs over the course of 90 to 150 minutes without getting annoyed? Or is this a movie made up entirely of supporting characters, which also sounds like a dumb arthouse or college film experiment

Oh no. So cloud atlas with mcu trappings?

 

[instythot]

I've stated this before in the thread, but a war movie like Saving Private Ryan handled that just fine. The difference is that you got to know the characters through bits and pieces and a few of them died along the way to thin the cast out before they got to the bridge battle. I don't know how in sweet Mary's ass this piece of shit is going to manage that. Unlike the previously mentioned Spielberg classic and even the Phase 3 films (which were full of characters we already knew), this one can't afford to take too many breaks from the action or the jokes to deliver the time needed to allow the audience to understand that many new characters. It feels like Marvel is actually pulling a similar blunder to DC with this shit.

See, in something like Saving Private Ryan (or even the Dirty Dozen), everyone already knows and understands what the overarching major conflict is so you can cut most of the time where you'd normally explain that. Phase 3 is concluded. What are all the Marvel heroes doing aside from going back to routine superpowered police work? And what the fuck are 12 of them who are there to fight gods but not interfere doing?

They're gonna have to answer these basic questions in an interesting way, AND give us character arcs for each member of this new Retarded Dozen in a single film

 

[Marshal Mannerheim]

I know that she won’t as she’s a champagne socialist, but I wish that AOC would speak out against transhumanism on the basis that it would worsen the class disparity that already exists in society.

She's already opposed police robots so I wouldn't be so sure.

The only way they all disappear is to kill them.

Let me just point out that the Nazis didn't manage to wipe out European Jews despite being in a far superior military and economic position to the Jews and despite the general lack of Jewish resistance.

Then let me point out that your average Republican is probably better armed and better trained than your average Polish or Russian Jew in the 1940's.

I almost feel sorry for Zoetrope Robetus. His parents should have let the shrink help him.

They tried. He rejected any offer of help.

 

[Mola Ram]

The MCU are a major offender in the epidemic of "good" movies.

By that I mean there are so many popcorn movies now that are "good". There's nothing especially wrong with them. The writing in them is fairly solid, but unremarkable.

Perfectly passable flicks. But that's all they are. Passable.

It's very boring.

I think of these as "cotton candy" movies -- sweet, tasty, but dissolving into nothing within minutes of consumption.

 

[Red Hood]

As a final addendum to the capeshit cunnilingus talk: My grandpa, a WWII vet, used to say something along the lines of "the guys that talk/brag about combat are the ones that haven't experienced it". I feel this applies to sexual matters just as much.

But Yahztee does it and he's popular.

Yahtzee is by far the exception. Most people when they're talking fast come off as a used car salesman. I don't know how he produces it but I'm gonna wager Yahtzee scripts and rehearses his reviews a few times before attempting a final take.

The MCU are a major offender in the epidemic of "good" movies.

By that I mean there are so many popcorn movies now that are "good". There's nothing especially wrong with them. The writing in them is fairly solid, but unremarkable.

Perfectly passable flicks. But that's all they are. Passable.

It's very boring.

I feel like any given MCU movie is like "eh, I saw a movie, I didn't hate it. It was fine." Nothing life-changing or ground-breaking or even really that interesting. We've lowered the bar for "good". The Nolan Batman movies get overpraised but at the same time they're actually good films and Nolan cares deeply (maybe more than is healthy) about his craft. You can understand why that caught everyone's attention, they weren't "good for a Superhero movie", they were good movies in general. Raimi's Spider-Man films were charming in a way that embraced the corniness of the genre but still were very good films.

I don't see the same thing from the MCU. They're too obviously assembly-lined and made to a formula. It's like going to a car meet and you meet the tuner kid that's genuinely excited to talk about about all the little mods to his Eclipse, the boomer that's poured years of love into this hot rodded 32 Chevy...and the guy that bought a new performance car with every option and no passion put into it. It's just formula.

 

[Godzilla@1989]

As a final addendum to the capeshit cunnilingus talk: My grandpa, a WWII vet, used to say something along the lines of "the guys that talk/brag about combat are the ones that haven't experienced it". I feel this applies to sexual matters just as much.

Yahtzee is by far the exception. Most people when they're talking fast come off as a used car salesman. I don't know how he produces it but I'm gonna wager Yahtzee scripts and rehearses his reviews a few times before attempting a final take.

I feel like any given MCU movie is like "eh, I saw a movie, I didn't hate it. It was fine." Nothing life-changing or ground-breaking or even really that interesting. We've lowered the bar for "good". The Nolan Batman movies get overpraised but at the same time they're actually good films and Nolan cares deeply (maybe more than is healthy) about his craft. You can understand why that caught everyone's attention, they weren't "good for a Superhero movie", they were good movies in general. Raimi's Spider-Man films were charming in a way that embraced the corniness of the genre but still were very good films.

I don't see the same thing from the MCU. They're too obviously assembly-lined and made to a formula. It's like going to a car meet and you meet the tuner kid that's genuinely excited to talk about about all the little mods to his Eclipse, the boomer that's poured years of love into this hot rodded 32 Chevy...and the guy that bought a new performance car with every option and no passion put into it. It's just formula.

I sometimes wonder what would the MCU look like if Disney never bought out Marvel. Maybe we would have gotten a tighter focus on emotional narrative and risks at the cost of expansive looking CGI.

 

[Wulfpack Legend]

I sometimes wonder what would the MCU look like if Disney never bought out Marvel. Maybe we would have gotten a tighter focus on emotional narrative and risks at the cost of expansive looking CGI.

Here’s one potential idea:

 

[Lensherr]

I feel like any given MCU movie is like "eh, I saw a movie, I didn't hate it. It was fine." Nothing life-changing or ground-breaking or even really that interesting. We've lowered the bar for "good". The Nolan Batman movies get overpraised but at the same time they're actually good films and Nolan cares deeply (maybe more than is healthy) about his craft. You can understand why that caught everyone's attention, they weren't "good for a Superhero movie", they were good movies in general. Raimi's Spider-Man films were charming in a way that embraced the corniness of the genre but still were very good films.

I don't see the same thing from the MCU. They're too obviously assembly-lined and made to a formula. It's like going to a car meet and you meet the tuner kid that's genuinely excited to talk about about all the little mods to his Eclipse, the boomer that's poured years of love into this hot rodded 32 Chevy...and the guy that bought a new performance car with every option and no passion put into it. It's just formula.

I feel like a big part of why the MCU gets so overpraised is that their whole business model is designed to engender brand loyalty: the whole shared-universe concept has never been attempted on the scale that they’ve done it, and in order to be fully “in the know”, you have to see all of the movies. So the prospect of getting to see all the heroes team up on screen grants them a degree of leeway and insulates them from criticism (i.e., “we HAVE to support these movies or else we won’t get an Avengers movie.”). Just try insinuating that one of these movies is less than good in certain circles and you’ll see what I mean.

 

[ChampFantana]

Where can I find pictures of high school Bob?

I don't remember which post, but somebody earlier in this thread posted screencaps of a HS aged Bobert in one of his early videos.

He looks exactly like you probably imagined he would.

 

[Gaear Grimsrud]

I feel like a big part of why the MCU gets so overpraised is that their whole business model is designed to engender brand loyalty: the whole shared-universe concept has never been attempted on the scale that they’ve done it, and in order to be fully “in the know”, you have to see all of the movies. So the prospect of getting to see all the heroes team up on screen grants them a degree of leeway and insulates them from criticism (i.e., “we HAVE to support these movies or else we won’t get an Avengers movie.”). Just try insinuating that one of these movies is less than good in certain circles and you’ll see what I mean.

I was actually the same way once.

Back when the Ryan Reynolds Green Lantern movie came out, I was in denial about how mediocre it was. Mainly because I wanted it to be a success so we'd get a Wonder Woman movie and other DC stuff like that.

Now I've progressed and am more-or-less indifferent to all of it.

The irony is that when we finally did get a Wonder Woman movie, it was another "technically good" movie that you don't think about after leaving the theater.

 

[Oliver Onions]

I could never muster the interest to watch the Harley Quinn show.

I just don't give a shit about Harley Quinn in general. Especially this pseudo-Deadpool take on her they've been doing the last several years.

And every clip of the show I've seen just comes off like a Robot Chicken sketch.

I liked Harley Quinn when they didn't try to make her anything other than what she is: a ditzy sidekick for the infinitely more interesting villain.

I still can't fathom the bizarre decision to turn her into a sex symbol with her Suicide Squad incarnation, or this seemingly endless drive to make her a pop culture icon in her own right...it's like giving Nappa from DBZ his own show.

It is a crime against the entertainment interests of this community that Jonah Goldberg responds to one of Bob's failed owning attempts but Glenn Greenwald hasn't.

Come on Glenn. Take Bob down a notch. Double the amount of points if you use the Lindsay Ellis tweet in your response to him.

l still remember his diabetes announcement because he literally blamed everyone but himself for him developing it.
View attachment 2265878

I am no doctor but I have to wonder to what excess Bob had to be eating to end up with any form of diabetes. We all get sloppy with our diet from time to time, I'm sure, but to what level do you have to take it for it to become a medical issue? Especially since by the sounds of things it happened in a relatively short period of time.

I get the feeling he isn't being entirely honest here and his diet never stopped being shit, it only got less shit til he found an excuse to completely pig out again.

 

[instythot]

I liked Harley Quinn when they didn't try to make her anything other than what she is: a ditzy sidekick for the infinitely more interesting villain.

I still can't fathom the bizarre decision to turn her into a sex symbol with her Suicide Squad incarnation, or this seemingly endless drive to make her a pop culture icon in her own right...it's like giving Nappa from DBZ his own show.

I am no doctor but I have to wonder to what excess Bob had to be eating to end up with any form of diabetes. We all get sloppy with our diet from time to time, I'm sure, but to what level do you have to take it for it to become a medical issue? Especially since by the sounds of things it happened in a relatively short period of time.

I get the feeling he isn't being entirely honest here and his diet never stopped being shit, it only got less shit til he found an excuse to completely pig out again.

Eating yourself into diabetes does not happen over a short period of time. Your doctor will have been suggesting that you look into diet and exercise for years before you even become pre-diabetic

 

[Oliver Onions]

Eating yourself into diabetes does not happen over a short period of time. Your doctor will have been suggesting that you look into diet and exercise for years before you even become pre-diabetic

So in all likelihood, 'cutting down on excess carbs' meant not having fries with his Big Mac and the water he was chugging was likely the flavoured Evian stuff with as much sugar as a Coke.

 

[>tfw no Asian gf]

She's already opposed police robots so I wouldn't be so sure.

To be fair, I have a feeling that robocops would just start shooting random Blacks kinda like how Tesla cars don't detect them as people so they just run them over, either that or they'd randomly start commiting suicide, like that one mall security robot that as soon as it got it's AI upgraded it decided to kill itself by launching itself into a water fountain, now to be fair I too would kill myself if my entire reason to exist was to police joggers so I wouldn't blame them if they do that.

 

[instythot]

So in all likelihood, 'cutting down on excess carbs' meant not having fries with his Big Mac and the water he was chugging was likely the flavoured Evian stuff with as much sugar as a Coke.

Given the full blown diabetes, I'd guess a regular sized fries instead of a super sized fries is his version of cutting down excess. And offsetting soda by drinking equal amounts of water

 

[Grumpy Pickle Rick]

What we have today are mentally stunted children incapable of imagining anything that's unlike themselves.

Hmm… You bring up a good point.

In the past decade, a lot of animated shows and characters have been written by people(mostly women) who based their characters on themselves and their lives/deepest desires.

Take the Owl House for example:

Dana Terrace is the producer of The Owl House cartoon, she is a bi-girl whose currently dating Alex Hirsch, producer of Gravity Falls. There used to be a bit of /co/ threads dedicated to her, but they've been increasing in numbers since the debut of her show. The show is so boring, that anons would rather talk about the creator's personal life, and their interest was piqued when they realized that two of the main characters are self inserts for Dana and her 'friend', Luz Batista:
View attachment 1787383
View attachment 1787384
It raised some eyebrows, because Dana made the relationship between Amity (Dana's self insert) and Luz N.'s (Luz B.'s self insert) a huge deal to the point where it kind of blew up on twitter, so anons on /co/ did the big think and theorized that Dana only created the Owl House to relieve her lesbian fantasies with her exotic Dominican roommate who she wished she scissored when she had the chance.

What is with all the self inserts lately?

I’m serious, what is the big deal with self insertion?

 

[Quixotic Man]

Hmm… You bring up a good point.

In the past decade, a lot of animated shows and characters have been written by people(mostly women) who based their characters on themselves and their lives/deepest desires.

Take the Owl House for example:


What is with all the self inserts lately?

I’m serious, what is the big deal with self insertion?

People that grew up writing bad Mary Sue fan fiction became the professional writers of today.

 

[Marshal Mannerheim]

To be fair, I have a feeling that robocops would just start shooting random Blacks

I'd be unsurprised if:
• due to the restrictions placed on policing by leftist local governments and the general distrust of policing caused by the Mostly Peaceful Racial Justice Protests™, Bahstan PD starts using robots on patrols
• Blob, being the temporarily embarassed technocrat he is, supports it
• those robots kill or shoot at a black guy
• AOC and her fellow progressives try and use this to help further the revolution, and Blob, being the autist he is, fails to read the room and insists that what happened was just a mistake and robots are totally safe
• Blob gets quote tweeted by his various waifus and dunked on by half the left, his KF thread jumps fifty pages in a day, and he goes offline for several days. Most people assume he's blacked out drunk somewhere, until
• the Capitol Police arrest Blob and drag him out of AOC's flat, holding a bouquet of flowers from the petrol station in one hand and an ”apology letter” written on Super Mario stationery in the other. She addresses the incident on an Instagram Live video by saying ”At least it wasn't Ben fucking Shapiro again.”

Admit it, you could see it happening.

 

[Grumpy Pickle Rick]

People that grew up writing bad Mary Sue fan fiction became the professional writers of today.

Which is really sad and disappointing when you really think about it. We used to be fun and creative but now we’ve become narcissistic, bland and generic.

 

[Godzilla@1989]

I'd be unsurprised if:
• due to the restrictions placed on policing by leftist local governments and the general distrust of policing caused by the Mostly Peaceful Racial Justice Protests™, Bahstan PD starts using robots on patrols
• Blob, being the temporarily embarassed technocrat he is, supports it
• those robots kill or shoot at a black guy
• AOC and her fellow progressives try and use this to help further the revolution, and Blob, being the autist he is, fails to read the room and insists that what happened was just a mistake and robots are totally safe
• Blob gets quote tweeted by his various waifus and dunked on by half the left, his KF thread jumps fifty pages in a day, and he goes offline for several days. Most people assume he's blacked out drunk somewhere, until
• the Capitol Police arrest Blob and drag him out of AOC's flat, holding a bouquet of flowers from the petrol station in one hand and an ”apology letter” written on Super Mario stationery in the other. She addresses the incident on an Instagram Live video by saying ”At least it wasn't Ben fucking Shapiro again.”

Admit it, you could see it happening.

Have Lindsey Ellis shout “It’s a me, Lindsey, you’re a fat faggot.”