Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

When will Jack drop dead?

  • February-March 2024

    Votes: 6 0.4%
  • April-May 2024

    Votes: 6 0.4%
  • June-July 2024

    Votes: 18 1.3%
  • August-September 2024

    Votes: 34 2.4%
  • October-November 2024

    Votes: 37 2.7%
  • December 2024

    Votes: 44 3.2%
  • Sometime in 2025

    Votes: 258 18.5%
  • Sometime in 2026

    Votes: 198 14.2%
  • Jack lives forever. The Wendigo Must Consoom

    Votes: 794 56.9%

  • Total voters
    1,395
Even as someone who doesn't believe in organized religion, it's insane how easy it is for Jack to go to hell since for a supposed Christian, he sure as hell commits a lot of sin especially for how terrible he is.

It's pretty funny that he probably meant this in how he's scared for hearing his child's voice, but if he somehow ends up there, I hope they play the voices of the kid he choked while he is punished.
 
I bet the garlic is that nuclear yellow shit that he keeps freezing and unthawing, probably isn’t helping the color of the filling much either. Jalapeños, so he’s trying to make it spicy so Tammy won’t want any of it.

What lying fat piece of shit. I hope they have to dig the gallstones out of body like they did with kidney stones, through his microdick.
 
Why why why the fuck would you stuff a brisket? I mean, different strokes for different folks and all, but just WHY??
View attachment 2499369
Along with appearing undercooked, I can’t decide which physiological horror this resembles most…oozing pus, gangrene, Mucormycosis, or Necrotizing Fasciitis.
Oh god it’s even worse looking up close.

15A73583-4510-45DE-8C3B-B5473A4889BD.jpeg
 
I love brisket, and I love bacon…

THAT is fucking repulsive.
I honestly can't see the point in wrapping brisket in bacon. Maybe in tin foil to keep it from drying out (too much), but why? It doesn't need bacon flavor overpowering the brisket flavor, which is entirely good enough to carry itself. Maybe if you got a really lean brisket, but then why not just put lardons in it instead of around it?
 
It looks like he got confused and stuffed the brisket with wood pellets and then used the veggies to start the smoker.

The next level will be "Aunt Myrna's Party Cheese Brisket" in which he stuffs it with cool whip, jello, celery, pineapple and whatever it was that went into that abomination.

I'm wondering if he genuinely believes that all that meat is healthy. Probably his brother's constant praise of the magical carnivore diet isn't exactly helping.
 
I've smoked my fair share of briskets and it appears to be fairly cooked through, but it looks dry as fuck. The shine or "juice" you see is likely just the bacon grease, the meat itself especially in the right half looks dry as fuck. Properly cooked brisket will literally ooze moisture if cooked and allowed to rest for a couple hours. Either Jack didn't let it rest and cut into it immediately (probably the most likely) or Jack had that thing frozen forever and all the liquid came out while he was smoking it from all the little ice crystal punctures.

Also that smoke ring is weak as fuck.
 

A few things from this GEM.

Within 3 seconds "...the show's blowing up..." Really?


Recipe looks like a disaster from a Kitchen Nightmare strip mall Italian restaurant.

4:56 - "The moment my lips touched the skin...I could taste the butteryness....and the ball" What?

5:11 - *nearly crying for some reason, flavor overload maybe* "Becasue I want more BALLsamic, even more than that" *nearly cries again*

5:22 - *dejected* "So I guess this is going to be my dinner tonight?" - Not long after he said he was taking these wings over to the kids' house for their dinner. He sounded so resigned and like he was told "That's YOUR dinner tonight" by Tammy
 
Acorn squash still with us. How long until that thing dry rots on the counter?

Edit: I love how the thumbnail title is “Buttery Garlic Wing” as if he made a single wing instead of 4lbs of them. LOL.
 
Last edited:
Why why why the fuck would you stuff a brisket? I mean, different strokes for different folks and all, but just WHY??
This is a certain type of online chef. They think the more adjectives applied to a recipe, the better it must be. I guess it's just distilled consumerism: quantity over quality.
 
"BUTTERY BALSAMIC WING"

Jack acts like it was an accident that he bought too many wings so he's forced to make a double batch. Funny how that keeps happening. Dried minced garlic for the super lazy touch. Using dirt cheap "balsamic" ($3.48 for 16.9 oz at Walmart) that is mostly wine vinegar with some caramel coloring. Even though he doubles the wings, he doesn't double the balsamic so his wings aren't fully soaking in the marinade. Is butter in a marinade even a thing? He's putting it back in the fridge, isn't the butter going to re-solidify? And why did he bother to bring the meat to room temperature? Jack roasts at 400 for an unspecified amount of time then we get a close-up of a couple of wings. We have to just imagine how bad the other wings turned out if this is all he's showing us. "I can taste the butteriness"
 
Lord we've been blessed with another fucked up gem.

If you didn't crowd the pan. You'd have more Browning on the wings.


You could have reduced that balsamic down to a glaze and had the concentrated falcon you were looking for. Melt some butter and mix it in and it may have made a halfway decent coating after you baked them.

Although just drizzling with reduced balsamic would have been enough.
 
Back