It was just another normal day for x86x2. He woke up two hours late in the wrecked shithole of a room his parents paid for and missed his college class, which was some sort of auto CAD or something. X86x2 wasn’t exactly sure to be honest, since he never really paid attention to any of the lectures, and he sure as hell didn’t do any of the assignments. Those were nowhere near important to his true calling.
Speaking of which, he quickly checked his laptop, which he always kept right next to him at any time so it could alert him to the RSSfeed for 4chan. He needed it, so he could find all of those filthy stealth pictures those damned bronies liked to sneak in on /v/. His instructor disapproved of this, but what did she know; her words are worthless. Especially considering all the subhuman retards in the class.
This was far more important than attaining a degree anyway. After all, if he couldn’t spot this now, then how would he ever have a chance to become a janitor for this place? He cared not that the board was owned by a criminal; it was still ultra big, and being a staff member there would give him respect for sure!
Ignoring his growing hunger and thirst, x86x2 quivered in rage as he saw he missed a thread while sleeping. How dare his body ignore the alarm that his laptop blared out whenever it picked up a picture!
The worst part was that it was the Rainbow Dash Nightmare gif of the flowers! That was a direct reference to… HIM! X86x2 chittered to himself in his native language, which consisted of grunting, rocking, and smacking himself. He was the epitome of everything wrong with the world. HE ruined everything he touched. Ranging from Pink Floyd to Splatoon; from My Little Pony to Tomie DePaola. All of those were ruined for him, ever since that one night…
He shivered in a congruence of hate and another emotion he tried to suppress with the thought. Worse off, his rather underwhelming cock was beginning to stiffen at the thought of HIM. HE always did this to him whenever he thought of him, which was depressingly common. Why did HE always make him feel like that?
He needed to scold these barneyfags; if he did, then he’d feel more at ease, and his growing lust would calm down. However, as he finished copy-pasting his copypasta, he found to his horror the thread saged.
X86x2 screamed in denied rage. He cared not when he heard a muffled voice the next room over telling him to shut up! He needed to respond about this, perhaps by creating a thread bitching about the tripfag? It could work, he’d be able to stay normal and not…
His eyes gazed over to something he shoved partially in the closet. It was a personal point of shame that he gave into his weakness and spent what was supposed to be gas money on it. The rather elegantly sculpted object was a rich royal purple, with an emerald underside. It had a scaly texture and made out of a rubber that was firm, but yielded slightly with applied pressure. The object was indeed a dildo, one he personally purchased from Bad Dragon.
His microdick pulsed a bit at the thought of it seeing use again, and X86x2 rubbed his legs together at the idea of sliding it inside. He hated that it always felt so much better when he used it, but he never found the will to throw it away, even if it had HIS color scheme. He ruthlessly tried crushing this impulse before it was too late, and set back to work, ruthlessly trying to quash his now rock hard erection.
He finished his thread and call out, and eagerly awaited the results, refreshing as often as he could to take his mind off of HIM and things that he… no, he doesn’t want to do with him. He finally saw a response, crowing in victory at what he expected was a convert; someone who could see the infection for what it was. Something that could take his mind off of the evil temptress over in his closet.
He didn’t expect an autoplay video where HE and the children from that damnable show begin singing along with the disappointingly common response to shut up. It was just too much. Listening to that voice…
X86x2 moaned in need as his penis dribbled a bit of precum. HIS voice was always too much for him; he never failed to get in the mood when he heard HIM talk. Memories he tried to suppress regularly came to the surface. One in particular was one where he stated to his parents that he wanted to marry HIM. He shook his head at that; tears threatening to break past his eyes. That was a different life; a different time. Before he KNEW.
Virulently repulsed at what he was feeling, he looked over to the dildo with conflicted eyes. It was something he needed now, the voice of HIM almost seemingly coercing him into doing this. He crawled off of his messy bed, unintentionally trying to do a sort of cat walk in the process. Like a starving man would for food, he clutched the seven inch dildo like it was his lifeline.
He noticed that he also kept a lubricant next to this duplicate of HIS penis, and readily put it around his hands and on the dildo. He felt a slight pulse rock in his body as his dick drooled a bit more at the glistening example of reptilian manhood. He gently pumped the false dick like it was real, and it was attached to HIM. The fact that the video in the background was now having HIM talk more excitedly encouraged x86x2, as he began imagining it was his doing that was having the effect.
He needed to taste it now. He lifted his hands off the dildo, now that it was properly lubricated for what he needed to do with it. He started by gently licking on the shaft, relishing and wanting to vomit due to the grape flavored lubricant. He then kissed the top of the head, going back down to the shaft in a flurry of light pecks. He absently wished that he bought a model with balls, before he screamed that this was something a barneyfag would say.
He couldn’t stop himself as he opened his jaw, and started to go down on the dildo. His mouth always had issues fitting the firm rubber into his mouth, and his jaw was already starting to feel some strain trying to work this faux meat stick. He used his tongue to roll around the girthy tool of lust when he could, as his hands began to work off his tighty whiteys.
His underwear was stained from all the dick milk his cock was drooling, and it was starting to drive him crazy. HIS own exclamations of joy in that video was a heady wine to his ears, his insides twitching, his dick pulsing, and the noises of pleasure muffling his mind. Why did he hate Barney again. He loved everyone, including x86x2, the notion bringing tears to his eyes again as he began to rub his asshole with his lubed up fingers; his mouth struggling to reach the hilt of that dildo.
X86x2 didn’t have many friends due to reasons he didn’t understand. He was smarter than most of his peers, but he was still placed with them, even though he saw that other people didn’t need help and could do things that made his head hurt. Barney was different though. His fingers began working the inside, teasing the muscles as his underwhelming dick began streaming more fluid.
He accepted who he was, and kept him company when he was lonely. Ever since he could remember, Barney was there for him. As he grew older, Barney still accepted him, and because of that, he knew that he was the one. He would marry that purple dinosaur and live a life as his housewife. His twitching fingers found a firmer spot and he gave out a muffled gasp of pleasure as he felt a building tension in his loins. He needed to consummate their wedding now.
He disengages from the dildo, Barney saying to him that he loves him. X86x2 cries both in joy and sorrow as he slowly begins sliding the dildo in, feeling warm for the first time in days. His ass always felt like it was going to tear when he slid his surrogate dickstick in, but this time it just felt like electricity arcing up his spine. The fire in his belly became a thermite reaction, or like a bomb fuse igniting as the mother of all explosions begins to build. Whatever reservations he might still have went away as his bestial instincts took over.
Why did his classmates laugh at him when he revealed his love? They watched the show too. Why did people think it was for kids? Why did he have to hate this when his husband’s cock felt so damn good? He began kissing the wall, envisioning that instead of plaster, it was the snout of his big and gentle husband. For just this moment, it was bliss between the two.
The dildo was thrusting in and out, pressing down on that firm spot as x86x2 began gasping to go faster, his hips shoving down on his hand and trying to force it in deeper. He angles his body so that this dildo can more firmly strike that firm spot. A particularly deep stroke caused him to convulse, his tiny pecker unleashing a tidal wave of thick creamy cum. His limbs were jerking and he fell forward slightly as a quiet gasp being the only sign that he came.
X86x2 laid there in bliss, letting the dildo stay inside as he curled up into a fetal position. He knew this was wrong, but for the moment, he didn’t care. In fact, he hoped that he failed to keep his feelings inside more often. Maybe he should get a body pillow to hug so he could cuddle with his husband. Tired from his exertion, and not in the mood to ruin the moment, the newly affirmed barneyfag drifted off to sleep, having dreams that he’ll shriek about later in the day.
