Tess Holliday / Ryann Maegen Hoven - Beached Landwhale model, Body positive and social justice snacktivist, and gigantic fraud

[𝕺𝖑' 𝕯𝖎𝖗𝖙𝖞 𝕱𝖆𝖙𝖘𝖔]

What a beautiful place. Alaska doesn’t deserve to be polluted by the thundering herd of Long Beach trash. A trip like this will be completely wasted on Tess and will leave a sour taste in the mouths of any locals who may not have encountered Californians before.

I've met plenty of cool Californians but they're generally born and raised. The problem is the talentless trailer trash like tess who move to LA because they're delusional and want to be famous in some way

Videos versions of the above:
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These just look like Walmart people. None of this screams "Classy rich people on vacation."

I love when i check onto an Airbnb and it's full of poorly painted artwork of a fat bitch taking a dump

 

[FarmerKhourtney]

She’s so immature and annoying. She doesn’t have a good personality so instead she’s one of those “I’m just like the guys, I’m one of those fun chicks! I’m not like the other girls” and it’s obnoxious and most people grow out of it before they have kids

 

[Logical Fallacies]

She doesn’t have a personality so instead she’s one of those “I’m just like the guys, I’m one of those fun chicks! I’m not like the other girls”

Fixed that for you.

 

[FuckDuckSeagull]

LOL, Alaska will be completely wasted on someone like Ryann. It'll be a good warning for youth over there "See kids, this is what happens to you if you move to LA and have a non-job!" If she thinks this looks glam and luxe, she's even more delusional than anyone imagined.

 

[Angry New Ager]

For a fleeting moment, I thought, "Hey, maybe Tess will find some thirsty, desperate guy in Alaska willing to take her on."

And then I remembered the saying about certain men: "He can't get laid in a whorehouse." Well, it seems Tess has revealed the female equivalent: "She can't get laid in Alaska."

She’s so immature and annoying. She doesn’t have a good personality so instead she’s one of those “I’m just like the guys, I’m one of those fun chicks! I’m not like the other girls” and it’s obnoxious and most people grow out of it before they have kids

She's a "Pick Me" Girl—a woman who shits on other women in order to get approval from men. It's not a very good strategy, seeing how she already embodies so many other traits of toxic femininity.

 

[Brittnay Matthews]

Yes, and so are you.

Project and cope harder retard kek
Back on topic,



ETA:-
Jfc she's 36? She's thr oldest among them doing shit like this

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

Alaska is beautiful but the entire reason to visit or live there is the ability to spend time in nature (hiking, camping, boating, skiing, hunting, etc..) all of the best things Alaska has to offer require something Tess cannot do - be mobile and walk long distances.

Tess has gone to Alaska to do what she always does. Sit indoors and take some photos of herself within 100 feet of a vehicle or home. What a tragic waste of a trip. It’s like saying your going to hike the Appalachian or Oregon Trail but just sitting in an RV the entire time on your cell phone.

 

[Internet's Boyfriend]

I finally realized who tess reminds me of, an early 20's Lindsay Lohan but over inflated with pudding.

I realized a few months ago that she kinda looks like an obese Rose McGowan.

Project and cope harder retard kek
Back on topic,

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ETA:-
Jfc she's 36? She's thr oldest among them doing shit like this

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She's so tacky. Nadia/Nadia's sister has this smirk like she knows sitting next to Tess is going to make her look 100x better by comparison.

It's funny to see Tess dressed like she's about to go out when they're dressed all casual in sweatshirts and leggings.

 

[Water-T]

Tess letting the local men know she's ready to swallow both cake batter AND baby batter.

 

[Reepicheep]

 

[multiverse]

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What a downfall. An Inked cover in 2021? Much moddle! EDIT she didn't even get the fucking cover loooooool

Holy balls I can't wait to see the photos. She's so massive they already had to cover with a giant wig and a motorcycle to the point you can't even see her tattoos on the cover of a tattoo trade magazine.

Here's a couple, she's a fucking unit

 

[Cheesegirl78]

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That's Tess?
I thought it was Jeffree Star in heavy-duty drag.
I love how they had to hide all her fat behind the motorcycle.
And sorry, Tess, but I don't think Barb Wire is "an iconic sex symbol ". Perhaps you meant Pam Anderson instead?

 

[RainbowStarlight]

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Wait I'm confused. That's Tess? She is entirely unrecognizable. All that editing and that gross wig. Wouldn't you want to be recognizable if you're trying to get fAMOus??

 

[multiverse]

Wait I'm confused. That's Tess? She is entirely unrecognizable. All that editing and that gross wig. Wouldn't you want to be recognizable if you're trying to get fAMOus??

Yeah, they really just shoved her behind a motorcycle and slapped a new face on under that cheap wig. And she's tattooed all over but she's more fully dressed than she is in real life - I guess no one at Inked wanted to see her in the standard bikini shot they do of every heavily tattooed woman.

 

[Cheesegirl78]

Another thought:
How the hell were they able to actually GET Tess on a cycle? A crane?
I cannot see her being able to lift her hamhocks over the seat.

Edit: is she behind the motorcycle? It looked like she's sitting on it. That answers my question about how she was able to get on the motorcycle.

 

[multiverse]

Another thought:
How the hell were they able to actually GET Tess on a cycle? A crane?
I cannot see her being able to lift her hamhocks over the seat.

Edit: is she behind the motorcycle? It looked like she's sitting on it. That answers my question about how she was able to get on the motorcycle.

I'm 100% sure it's just a prop - the handlebars are in front of a box you can climb up on (possibly with a saddle but I think she'd struggle with that), and you just shoot tightly in front of the handlebars. You can add the rest of the bike in post if you want.

 

[FuckDuckSeagull]

What a downfall. An Inked cover in 2021? Much moddle! EDIT she didn't even get the fucking cover loooooool

Holy balls I can't wait to see the photos. She's so massive they already had to cover with a giant wig and a motorcycle to the point you can't even see her tattoos on the cover of a tattoo trade magazine.

Here's a couple, she's a fucking unit
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Holy photoshop Batman, the amount of contour and editing is off the charts. Cover of Inked and you can't even see her tattoos

 

[multiverse]

Cover of Inked and you can't even see her tattoos

Not the cover, it seems from Inked's own site. She's got a cover, but she wasn't even the headliner. J Balvin is their cover.

You can order it with any of 3 different covers, but he's got top billing. Tess has 2nd runner up.

 

[Daddy's Little Kitten]

What's the point of being featured in a tattoo magazine if I can't see the tattoos lol.

 

[Internet's Boyfriend]

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I think it looks alright but only because I can't tell that it's Tess.

They did a really good job at hiding how fat she is, whoever's responsible should get a raise.