- Joined
- Aug 23, 2020
you know she ordered those stickers off wish $3 for 80 stickers probably and now wants to profit off it
Amberlynn Reid - 600 pound pathological liar and U-Haul lesbian moving in with her next live-in maid/nurse/girlfriend.
- Thread starter PiggyPie
- Start date
- Joined
- Jan 23, 2018
- Joined
- Jan 15, 2017
Even is she sold the stickers it’d just end up like the earring enterprise. The shipping would be outrageous and she’d shit the bed with the operation after a day of orders.
- Joined
- Dec 31, 2019
Wow, Amber really became boring if all we are discussing anymore are her stickers and her umpteenth mukbang
- Joined
- Mar 28, 2019
Fuck the stickers. I'd pay to see her unhinge her jaw and swallow a whole salami.
It's coming. I'm sure it will be Mrs. Dash and garlic salted from hell. But these mukbangs? Good Lord, I just can't watch anyone cram that much food in their face at one sitting while eye-fucking their dainty selves.
- Joined
- Dec 16, 2019
I think the best thing about Amber being "famous" is that anyone who went to school with her could look her up and see that she's 31, has no further education, owns no property, is even fatter than she was as a kid, has no close family, has no relationship unless you count her faceless caretaker (and no one does) and she has a reputation for being a liar and a laughingstock.
That has to be a nice change from the times when you look up old classmates to find that they're more successful than you.
That has to be a nice change from the times when you look up old classmates to find that they're more successful than you.
- Joined
- Feb 3, 2013
‘Surprised her former classmates haven’t come out of the cracks to comment on her videos. Amber must of been the forgettable bad girl at school that didn’t show up half the time and never stayed for an entire school year.
- Joined
- Jul 22, 2013
It’s been years since she’s been in school. Why would any of them even think about amber? She’s not famous enough for anyone to care; it’s very unlikely that someone has their highschool yearbook out and is googling everyone they find.
- Joined
- Feb 3, 2013
everybody remembers that weird Kid at school.
- Joined
- Jun 3, 2021
If we ignore the obvious bullshit like her being in the bad-girls-clique that Chantal wishes she was in, Amber lead us to believe she was never in one school long enough to make an impression.
If we also ignore her bullshit about being recommended for high end degrees in law, Amber lead us to believe she was only capable of Special Educational Needs classes.
I believe she once said her nickname at school was 'Fat Amber', which is about as creative as Amber can get and makes me believe she was never noticeable enough to gain a real nickname and she thought that one up herself.
- Joined
- Sep 28, 2019
Who doesn't love another giant plate of carby goodness after polishing off a previous giant plate of carby goodness? Yum! And bonus storytime about the FBI??!? What could it be? Did they want you to go undercover because they have no agents that are 600 pounds? Did they want a sample of DNA to see if the skeletal remains they found was someone related to you somehow? Did they want to present you with an award because something you said triggered a memory in someone else, that person went tot he FBI to give a statement, and that statement helped the FBI solve a hard to crack case? Do they want you to come in for pitchers and maybe a small ceremony with all your "friends" where you can act surprised and do a not at all fake doubletake at someone holding a camera? Do tell, gorl.
Intro. Stupid. Skipped.
"Today we have a mook-bong!" Yeah, we figured that out on our own from the title of the video. WHY must you sit the plate at the level of your throat and force us to watch this angle? I know it will lessen the distance between the plate and your piehole, so you can eat faster, Ms. "Mook-bongs Make Me Eat Slower", but this sucks. It's even worse than the E&R Era, where you sat at the table and set the food on totes or game boxes. It's just so fucking uncomfortable. Plus it looks like what I imagine human sacrifices would see as they were led to the gaping mouth of a volcano to be tossed in.
"And a storytime." Great.
She's very excited about the food and takes a wandering path to tell us it is noodles with various meats that she, ya know, being a dainty princess and all, usually picks out. The very same thing she old us last time (in 2019) when she showed herself eating t his same dish in her bed. Why anyone would pick char siu pork out of anything is beyond me. Those people are heathens. Exhibit one: Big Al.
Story time, after she shoves a couple of giant forkfuls in her face, looking at herself in the cam the entire time. She claims that sometime back in October or November of last year, she was going through the comments on her videos - comments she claims not to read - and someone left a comment telling her they knew where she lived, they lived close, and they were going to kill her. One: bullshit. Two: bullshit. But carry on, Fatty.
Big Al tells us she's not only a dainty princess, but a brave one too - she isn't afraid of things! Except everything, as she is more than happy to tell us, whether it's stepping off a two inch curb in the wrong shoes or going to the doctor. She isn't bothered by comments! Except all of them that do not kiss her shelf-ass, as she indicated in an entire video whining about comments - that she TOTALLY doesn't read! - and containing enough suicidal ideation that YT put a warning on it. Anyway, this comment scurred her, so she took a screenshot and sent it to several of her "friends" (sure) and Becky, asking them "What is this?" Well, stupid (as I imagine they replied) looks like a death threat. So what does Big Al do? Nothing, apparently. She says nothing about contacting YT about it, or the Lexington MPD. How odd. As usual, she's waiting for someone else to do the work.
She claims that "actually, some of yoooo also found that comment and were scurred of it as well, because..." Uh huh. "Duhn-duhn-DUHN!" Why the fuck are you putting a fanfare in this, you twat?
Fast forward to now. Hamber claims that:
"I get a message on Instagram from my ex's sister and said 'The FBI showed up for you', um, she sent me a pitcher of, like, the card that the FBI gave her, the FBI said 'Contact her, 'cause we need to talk to her.' I was terrified. I had a panic attack cause I had to sit there and think of my life." Yeah, I'd be having a panic attack about how I'd destroyed my life, too, if I were you. "Like, literally,did I do something that I don't remember that I did, like, honestly, I was SO terrified. I was, like, what is happening?"
Let's unpack this pile of horseshit before we move on. Which ex? Not Becky, presumably, because people would just ask Becky or Misty Pedofucker if this steaming pile is true (it is not). That leaves Density. Nobody really knows how to get in touch with her family, but I bet Density would have heard about this little event, were it true (it is not). Secondly, why didn't the FBI just come to YOU directly? Third, I retain hope that one of these days, a panic attack and the associated respiratory things that go with it will cause that overworked, elephant-sized heart of yours to explode one day. This one, if true (it is not) alas, didn't. Finally, why the fuck would someone's first response, if they've literally done nothing, as you have, LiarLynn, be "terrified" about anything related to this, were it true (it is not). Moving on. After she shovels another load of noodles down.
"I don' know why, but the FBI didn't know I lived here." I know why! Because it doesn't suit the major lie you're spinning up. I mean, it isn't like they have the actual word "investigation" in their name or anything.
"Obviously, immediately, I end up calling the number that is on the FBI guy's uh, FBI card." Did you? You and your panic attack and your phone ang-zie-tee immediately picked up the phone? And what the fuck is it with you and professional titles? The "FBI guy" is an Agent, or Special Agent. The "FBI card" is a fucking business card, you vapid cunt.
"Some woman [a receptionist, goddammit] picked up and I'm just gonna called the FBI guy "Frank" cause why not. Frank was out of the office or something"
You mean "Frank" wasn't sitting at his desk, or pacing in front of it, waiting for the Amber Lynn Reid to contact him? They should definitely put a letter of reprimand in his file.
"She was like, I can give him a call on his personal cell phone, to get like, ahold of him. And in my head, I was like whyyyyy does she like want to bother him on his personal phone instead of like leaving him a message" Because she doesn't, genius. Even if this did happen, and it did not, the receptionist is not going to call an agent on their personal phone - they have Bureau-issued cell phones, and landlines in the office, dumbass - and even if they were, they will not tell YOU that.
"What is the promptness of this" What? "Why do they wanna talk to me so bad?" It's "badly", WriterLynn, and when the FBI wants to talk to someone, they show up on that someone's doorstep - at home, at work, in a park, a store, wherever. You know, like how they showed up at your "ex's sister's door"?
"I'm very patient person." LOL. Except when it comes to doing the work to lose weight or follow a diet or literally anything that doesn't get you what you want without delay.
"Just imagine the FBI trying to contact you guys. It puts you in a headspace you didn't even know you had." Well, since you mention it, Fatty, I have been contacted by the FBI (in tandem with Homeland Security) because people are racist dickweasels and can't shut their yaps online about things such as killing the first black president this country had. Did I freak out or panic when they showed up - on my doorstep - with an order in hand for server logs? No. Because normal people are not scared of the world and every fucking thing in it, especially when they've done nothing wrong.
"So...it wasn't eeeven 45 seconds after I hung up with the receptionist. Frank called me. I said "Frank, man, you done scurred me." No, ok, it wasn't like that. Immediately, he said you are not in trouble. And I was like, oh my god, what did I do?" He JUST fucking told you that you weren't in trouble, JFC, at least make this fictitious episode make sense internally, bitch. And what the fuck is with her and this tremulous voice thing she has started? That's almost as fucking annoying as all the "like" insertions.
"Turns out...y'all, the FBI is actually on my side." The FBI is on the side of justice. Even were they investigating some rando comment, they would not be "on your side". They would be on the side of upholding the law about terroristic threats online. Dipshit. It isn't personal just for Big Ham.
"I never thought cops, or the FBI, would ever remotely care about some YouTuber online." That would be because they don't.
"Turns out, a lot of people reported that very comment that I saw, and I guess they reported it to authorities, like above even reporting it to YT. The FBI ended up seeing it. Like, Frank was, like, 'Oh my god, like complimenting me on my following and stuff. But guess what. They took that comment very seriously, they took an IP address, they tracked him. Oop."
"A lot of people" most certainly did not report that comment, were it even posted. "Frank", or any agent, would not care about your following/subscriber count.
"I'm not gonna say who the person is who left that comment, but it is a guy, and uh, I know his full name, I know where he lives."
The FBI is not going to give you these details, Fatty.
"So, they were, like, worried for me. They were like, do you know this guy. I was, like, nope, never heard of him. So, I dunno, I think it's pretty neat that, like, if there is, like, a fear that I have from like a YT comment or message, Frank is there. He said call me anytime if you ever feel threatened or anything like that."
No. They ALWAYS tell you to call the local PD or SO if you feel threatened. They are not there to provide total, dedicated services to YOU, Amber Lynn Reid, just in case you're scurred of something.
"I'm just...I never talked to the FBI before."
Congrats. You still haven't.
"They were really, truly, worried about my safety!"
SO worried that they couldn't even be bothered to show up to your apartment because they didn't know where you live and couldn't be assed to do a little detectiveness of maybe five minutes to find out. Some rando claimed he knew where you lived, the Farms tracked you down instantly when you were moving, yet the FBI, a Federal agency with lots of funding and access to things regular citizens do not, couldn't find you. Out of all of this crap on Mount Bullshit, this may be the biggest turd of them all.
"I felt really safe for a minute there. I just had to share that with you guys. So weird. I think I'm just overly grateful. Like, when it happened. This happened like..I know it's been like over a month, maybe two months. I don't really know. but when it happened, I was so scurred at the beginning. I was like oh my god, what did I do. Turns out I didn't do anything, they were just there for me. I dunno. I just think that's pretty great. That makes me feel, like, comforted."
Whatever. None of this shit happened, and we know it. What we do see is your inane attempt at trying to make people think twice about leaving mean comments, because the FBI really cares about you, personally, and wants to make sure you're safe. Sure, Jan.
Bottom line: you're a liar, as usual, the FBI doesn't work that way, and goddamn, get a baby name book or something to use names that aren't just the people you see around you. Libby, et al, in your horrendous "books" on WattPad, or Francis as "Frank" here. You call yourself a writer, but you suck at plots, storylines, character naming, continuity and every other fucking thing that goes along with writing. Stick to your boring, stupid, teenage angst-ridden poetry.
She continues eating and tries to give advice: pay attention to your hunger cues! When you feel yourself getting full, stop! Yeah, no one is going to take advice on eating or dieting from a 500+ pound behemoth, Fatty.
TL;DW/DR: Big Al vacuums up about two pounds of noodles and spins a wild tale about the FBI investigating a commenter, so don't leave her any mean comments, HAYDUR!
Intro. Stupid. Skipped.
"Today we have a mook-bong!" Yeah, we figured that out on our own from the title of the video. WHY must you sit the plate at the level of your throat and force us to watch this angle? I know it will lessen the distance between the plate and your piehole, so you can eat faster, Ms. "Mook-bongs Make Me Eat Slower", but this sucks. It's even worse than the E&R Era, where you sat at the table and set the food on totes or game boxes. It's just so fucking uncomfortable. Plus it looks like what I imagine human sacrifices would see as they were led to the gaping mouth of a volcano to be tossed in.
"And a storytime." Great.
She's very excited about the food and takes a wandering path to tell us it is noodles with various meats that she, ya know, being a dainty princess and all, usually picks out. The very same thing she old us last time (in 2019) when she showed herself eating t his same dish in her bed. Why anyone would pick char siu pork out of anything is beyond me. Those people are heathens. Exhibit one: Big Al.
Story time, after she shoves a couple of giant forkfuls in her face, looking at herself in the cam the entire time. She claims that sometime back in October or November of last year, she was going through the comments on her videos - comments she claims not to read - and someone left a comment telling her they knew where she lived, they lived close, and they were going to kill her. One: bullshit. Two: bullshit. But carry on, Fatty.
Big Al tells us she's not only a dainty princess, but a brave one too - she isn't afraid of things! Except everything, as she is more than happy to tell us, whether it's stepping off a two inch curb in the wrong shoes or going to the doctor. She isn't bothered by comments! Except all of them that do not kiss her shelf-ass, as she indicated in an entire video whining about comments - that she TOTALLY doesn't read! - and containing enough suicidal ideation that YT put a warning on it. Anyway, this comment scurred her, so she took a screenshot and sent it to several of her "friends" (sure) and Becky, asking them "What is this?" Well, stupid (as I imagine they replied) looks like a death threat. So what does Big Al do? Nothing, apparently. She says nothing about contacting YT about it, or the Lexington MPD. How odd. As usual, she's waiting for someone else to do the work.
She claims that "actually, some of yoooo also found that comment and were scurred of it as well, because..." Uh huh. "Duhn-duhn-DUHN!" Why the fuck are you putting a fanfare in this, you twat?
Fast forward to now. Hamber claims that:
"I get a message on Instagram from my ex's sister and said 'The FBI showed up for you', um, she sent me a pitcher of, like, the card that the FBI gave her, the FBI said 'Contact her, 'cause we need to talk to her.' I was terrified. I had a panic attack cause I had to sit there and think of my life." Yeah, I'd be having a panic attack about how I'd destroyed my life, too, if I were you. "Like, literally,did I do something that I don't remember that I did, like, honestly, I was SO terrified. I was, like, what is happening?"
Let's unpack this pile of horseshit before we move on. Which ex? Not Becky, presumably, because people would just ask Becky or Misty Pedofucker if this steaming pile is true (it is not). That leaves Density. Nobody really knows how to get in touch with her family, but I bet Density would have heard about this little event, were it true (it is not). Secondly, why didn't the FBI just come to YOU directly? Third, I retain hope that one of these days, a panic attack and the associated respiratory things that go with it will cause that overworked, elephant-sized heart of yours to explode one day. This one, if true (it is not) alas, didn't. Finally, why the fuck would someone's first response, if they've literally done nothing, as you have, LiarLynn, be "terrified" about anything related to this, were it true (it is not). Moving on. After she shovels another load of noodles down.
"I don' know why, but the FBI didn't know I lived here." I know why! Because it doesn't suit the major lie you're spinning up. I mean, it isn't like they have the actual word "investigation" in their name or anything.
"Obviously, immediately, I end up calling the number that is on the FBI guy's uh, FBI card." Did you? You and your panic attack and your phone ang-zie-tee immediately picked up the phone? And what the fuck is it with you and professional titles? The "FBI guy" is an Agent, or Special Agent. The "FBI card" is a fucking business card, you vapid cunt.
"Some woman [a receptionist, goddammit] picked up and I'm just gonna called the FBI guy "Frank" cause why not. Frank was out of the office or something"
You mean "Frank" wasn't sitting at his desk, or pacing in front of it, waiting for the Amber Lynn Reid to contact him? They should definitely put a letter of reprimand in his file.
"She was like, I can give him a call on his personal cell phone, to get like, ahold of him. And in my head, I was like whyyyyy does she like want to bother him on his personal phone instead of like leaving him a message" Because she doesn't, genius. Even if this did happen, and it did not, the receptionist is not going to call an agent on their personal phone - they have Bureau-issued cell phones, and landlines in the office, dumbass - and even if they were, they will not tell YOU that.
"What is the promptness of this" What? "Why do they wanna talk to me so bad?" It's "badly", WriterLynn, and when the FBI wants to talk to someone, they show up on that someone's doorstep - at home, at work, in a park, a store, wherever. You know, like how they showed up at your "ex's sister's door"?
"I'm very patient person." LOL. Except when it comes to doing the work to lose weight or follow a diet or literally anything that doesn't get you what you want without delay.
"Just imagine the FBI trying to contact you guys. It puts you in a headspace you didn't even know you had." Well, since you mention it, Fatty, I have been contacted by the FBI (in tandem with Homeland Security) because people are racist dickweasels and can't shut their yaps online about things such as killing the first black president this country had. Did I freak out or panic when they showed up - on my doorstep - with an order in hand for server logs? No. Because normal people are not scared of the world and every fucking thing in it, especially when they've done nothing wrong.
"So...it wasn't eeeven 45 seconds after I hung up with the receptionist. Frank called me. I said "Frank, man, you done scurred me." No, ok, it wasn't like that. Immediately, he said you are not in trouble. And I was like, oh my god, what did I do?" He JUST fucking told you that you weren't in trouble, JFC, at least make this fictitious episode make sense internally, bitch. And what the fuck is with her and this tremulous voice thing she has started? That's almost as fucking annoying as all the "like" insertions.
"Turns out...y'all, the FBI is actually on my side." The FBI is on the side of justice. Even were they investigating some rando comment, they would not be "on your side". They would be on the side of upholding the law about terroristic threats online. Dipshit. It isn't personal just for Big Ham.
"I never thought cops, or the FBI, would ever remotely care about some YouTuber online." That would be because they don't.
"Turns out, a lot of people reported that very comment that I saw, and I guess they reported it to authorities, like above even reporting it to YT. The FBI ended up seeing it. Like, Frank was, like, 'Oh my god, like complimenting me on my following and stuff. But guess what. They took that comment very seriously, they took an IP address, they tracked him. Oop."
"A lot of people" most certainly did not report that comment, were it even posted. "Frank", or any agent, would not care about your following/subscriber count.
"I'm not gonna say who the person is who left that comment, but it is a guy, and uh, I know his full name, I know where he lives."
The FBI is not going to give you these details, Fatty.
"So, they were, like, worried for me. They were like, do you know this guy. I was, like, nope, never heard of him. So, I dunno, I think it's pretty neat that, like, if there is, like, a fear that I have from like a YT comment or message, Frank is there. He said call me anytime if you ever feel threatened or anything like that."
No. They ALWAYS tell you to call the local PD or SO if you feel threatened. They are not there to provide total, dedicated services to YOU, Amber Lynn Reid, just in case you're scurred of something.
"I'm just...I never talked to the FBI before."
Congrats. You still haven't.
"They were really, truly, worried about my safety!"
SO worried that they couldn't even be bothered to show up to your apartment because they didn't know where you live and couldn't be assed to do a little detectiveness of maybe five minutes to find out. Some rando claimed he knew where you lived, the Farms tracked you down instantly when you were moving, yet the FBI, a Federal agency with lots of funding and access to things regular citizens do not, couldn't find you. Out of all of this crap on Mount Bullshit, this may be the biggest turd of them all.
"I felt really safe for a minute there. I just had to share that with you guys. So weird. I think I'm just overly grateful. Like, when it happened. This happened like..I know it's been like over a month, maybe two months. I don't really know. but when it happened, I was so scurred at the beginning. I was like oh my god, what did I do. Turns out I didn't do anything, they were just there for me. I dunno. I just think that's pretty great. That makes me feel, like, comforted."
Whatever. None of this shit happened, and we know it. What we do see is your inane attempt at trying to make people think twice about leaving mean comments, because the FBI really cares about you, personally, and wants to make sure you're safe. Sure, Jan.
Bottom line: you're a liar, as usual, the FBI doesn't work that way, and goddamn, get a baby name book or something to use names that aren't just the people you see around you. Libby, et al, in your horrendous "books" on WattPad, or Francis as "Frank" here. You call yourself a writer, but you suck at plots, storylines, character naming, continuity and every other fucking thing that goes along with writing. Stick to your boring, stupid, teenage angst-ridden poetry.
She continues eating and tries to give advice: pay attention to your hunger cues! When you feel yourself getting full, stop! Yeah, no one is going to take advice on eating or dieting from a 500+ pound behemoth, Fatty.
TL;DW/DR: Big Al vacuums up about two pounds of noodles and spins a wild tale about the FBI investigating a commenter, so don't leave her any mean comments, HAYDUR!
- Joined
- Jul 29, 2016
- Joined
- Sep 24, 2019
First, a heartfelt "thank you!" to Situation Type Deal Girl for her recaps. I can't bring myself to it through ALR's snooze inducing, repetitive crap any long, although masochist that I am, I may sit through her most recent grocery haul one... especially if insomnia hits again tonight.
Second - as SO many have pointed out, there is no way in hell any of her "Fibbie Frank" story adds up. Police, especially national level forces, simply do NOT operate that way.
Third, I am rubbing my hands together in anticipatory glee hoping Orko does his own recap on the FBI Fabrication Fest = replete with his brilliant screen grabs.
Second - as SO many have pointed out, there is no way in hell any of her "Fibbie Frank" story adds up. Police, especially national level forces, simply do NOT operate that way.
Third, I am rubbing my hands together in anticipatory glee hoping Orko does his own recap on the FBI Fabrication Fest = replete with his brilliant screen grabs.
- Joined
- Jun 5, 2020
Bro holy shit lmao. The amount of groceries this woman and her ass wiper girlfriend consume is ASTOUNDING. That previous grocery haul a week ago (probably pre-filmed lol but anyway) was enough food to feed a family of 6 for like 3 fucking weeks. She's telling us that they not only got through all that food, but also ordered Chinese and have been ordering pizzas? Holy hell. Wipey must be ballooning too.
The way Amber's shriveled up pea brain works is that she thinks the fact that she's (allegedly) in a treatment program and not on a specific diet at the moment means that she can eat whatever the fuck she wants, because LoOk gUiSe I'm FiNaLLy iN tHerApy so it's fine. She's LOVING this. She legit thinks being in therapy means she doesn't need to watch what she eats. Incredible. Praying we are blessed with a ravioli and plantain chip mookbong next.
The way Amber's shriveled up pea brain works is that she thinks the fact that she's (allegedly) in a treatment program and not on a specific diet at the moment means that she can eat whatever the fuck she wants, because LoOk gUiSe I'm FiNaLLy iN tHerApy so it's fine. She's LOVING this. She legit thinks being in therapy means she doesn't need to watch what she eats. Incredible. Praying we are blessed with a ravioli and plantain chip mookbong next.
- Joined
- Feb 11, 2020
To be fair she said fbi Frank contacted her ex's sister. Necks sister is a pedo fucker. Frank could have been at cancer wishing Misty Dawn's house taking computer drives and unshackling children from their basement or whatever, and he could have casually mentioned I'm a huge fan of fat spamber i hear she has meanie haters online, tell her to give me a call.
Turd Fergusson
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jul 28, 2019
Actually, this explanation makes more sense than what Amber said.
- Joined
- Nov 8, 2016
Polystyrene Glioblastoma
It's funny because it's true! - Trudy Wiegel
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Oct 20, 2018
Amberlynn brought up the FBI getting involved, most likely untrue or exaggerated, in order to lump the "haydurs" as psychotic lunatics. Amberlynn is "famous royalty", and anyone who challenges the narrative she creates is a "bad" person.
- Joined
- Sep 28, 2019
Two days again, still short of 50K. Ratio is doing well. Lizard tongue was working OT in this one.
A Widdle Woach
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Dec 9, 2019
Yet another haul of enough food for a family of six. Amazeeng. Love that for her.
Those bones are for a dog three or four times the size of Twinkie. God help that poor dog, one day she’s going to chip a tooth on one of those shitty ‘treats’ Hamber buys.
Those bones are for a dog three or four times the size of Twinkie. God help that poor dog, one day she’s going to chip a tooth on one of those shitty ‘treats’ Hamber buys.