Amberlynn Reid - 600 pound pathological liar and U-Haul lesbian moving in with her next live-in maid/nurse/girlfriend.

Are you looking forward to seeing Jade's face on camera?

  • Yes

    Votes: 551 15.6%
  • No

    Votes: 349 9.9%
  • I don't care

    Votes: 2,622 74.4%

  • Total voters
    3,522
"If you can't be a good example, you'll just have to be a horrible warning," has never been more apt. Disease management through emergency services equals chaos, which is what we see here. Also, delaying of services to people with REAL emergencies.

Something is...off. I can't help but feel like if My Girlfriend was around, there would be a lot of kiss-ass shit about how she's the BEST for injecting, feeding, supporting and chauffering.
 
I’ve never seen Ozempic prescribed for a person who wasn’t pre diabetic or diabetic (it is used for weight loss but only in those with pre diabetes from my experience )
As others said, it is used for weight control but the amount lost in clinical trials is minimal when considering Amber's weight. This is not a long-term solution. Only bariatric surgery would help her achieve to lose more weight but only if she wants to and complies with post-surgery diet. Amber is looking for a magic pill that would allow her to eat as much as she wants while losing weight. This is not going to work.

yes you can take estrogen after a hysterectomy related to cancer. They probably have her on it because of her GIGANTIC risk for osteoporosis. No pharmacist in their right mind would ever say Something so unprofessional to someone, it was Dr. Google telling her not to take her meds.
The estrogen was prescribed to her by her oncologist since she underwent a total hysterectomy with salpingo-oophorectomy, thus the need for hormone replacement. This is a good example of why you need a GP to manage your case. They would look at your medications including dosage and see if it is still appropriate. Of course, Amber knows more than most doctors.

going cold turkey off of lithium is so extremely dangerous and unhealthy i can’t even process how she does this all the time (and finds a way to transfer blame from herself to her “psychologist”)
I do not think she is on lithium. Last time, she mentioned that she was on Lamictal and Sertraline. These medications were never prescribed by a psychiatrist, but by the psychologist, she saw while in Monticello. No psychiatrist would not answer the phone for a whole week.
 
Hadn't seen these posted yet. The only way Big Al could have made them better was adding a bunch of black girl clapping and nail painting emojis.


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(Highlighting by whoever originally capped em. Sorry if these were already posted and I'm just blind and dumb)
 
Hadn't seen these posted yet. The only way Big Al could have made them better was adding a bunch of black girl clapping and nail painting emojis.


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(Highlighting by whoever originally capped em. Sorry if these were already posted and I'm just blind and dumb)
I think that these are the only right things Amber said in the last decade
 
Hadn't seen these posted yet. The only way Big Al could have made them better was adding a bunch of black girl clapping and nail painting emojis.


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(Highlighting by whoever originally capped em. Sorry if these were already posted and I'm just blind and dumb)
I hate to say it, but ALR has a point here. Also, they’re the same person - YDHB is ALR if she were thinner.

Edit: Ninja’d by @Lack of a better nickname
 
So that tooth finally fell out? Love that for her. I'll wait for Situation's recap but I assume she blames something other than her awful eating and hygiene habits. Wonder what new quirky disorder she'll have.
I need her to explain whether her parents were neglectful junkies who didn't give a shit about her OR good parents who taught her respect and to not be vindictive (HA). Which one is it, Hamber? Because you have spun a web of how awful your childhood was and how they were always on meth and left you with other junkies and you ended up in foster care because of it. so please, PLEASE, explain how they taught you any of that?
I swear there's just fat where her brain should be.

"no, they give me too many points which makes me binge"
This is the same bitch that "made herself" eat 3 slices of pizza when she was on phentermine or whatever it was that was supposed to be an appetite suppressant. She will make any excuse to shove food down her gullet.

Over/under on how many of the jerky treats in the Bark Box fatty is going to try to eat herself?
All of them.

"Two bacons" "80 protein" 50 sodiumz"
I swear this is more annoying than anything. This spastic way of giving these numbers is giving retard energy. Who the fuck says "two bacons" or "per each". Geniuslynn, obviously.

And since Amberlynn hasn't been hungry in decades, it's not going to work for her.
Exactly this. She would probably go the ER if she actually felt hunger, thinking she's dying. She can say "I'm starveeeen" all she wants but I call bullshit. She's 500 pounds and constantly eating. She just wants to eat. I feel like she's proven that over and over.
 
Hadn't seen these posted yet. The only way Big Al could have made them better was adding a bunch of black girl clapping and nail painting emojis.


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(Highlighting by whoever originally capped em. Sorry if these were already posted and I'm just blind and dumb)
lol @ "she eludes my medical history." What does that even mean?

Fat Jade is just as stupid as Amber, because Amber did not write those. That's not her tone, it's not her syntax, it's not her style, and they match absolutely no known examples of Hamber's babblings. That was written by an angry fat negro defending the honor of her owner.
 
lol @ "she eludes my medical history." What does that even mean?
I'm no pig whisperer, but I think she might've meant "alludes to my medical history"? I don't know how that's relevant to what she was saying, though. She can talk about her medical history in her videos, but we can't?

Also, I love how a non-native English speaker is miles better at English than Authorlynn. Not that I like YDHB, but I enjoyed the videos where she dragged Amber's writing through the mud.
 
I'm no pig whisperer, but I think she might've meant "alludes to my medical history"? I don't know how that's relevant to what she was saying, though. She can talk about her medical history in her videos, but we can't?
Yeah, I know that's what she meant, but they're both illiterate ghetto pigs and she left out "to" in addition to thinking any words that sound the same are synonyms.
 
What's sad is YDHB is definitely an egotistical fuck head with a shocking superiority complex (and an issue with believing herself to be a true and honest intellectual) but Hambo still wants to be her. She only gets this irate if she's jealous of someone.

Neither of their channels would be doing much if it wasn't for the larger surrounding Haydur audience. Both Fat Cunt and Slightly Less Fat Cunt rely on consistent drama to keep going.
I'll never get bored of ALR trying to appear mature and ''catty''.

That's one thing I don't think people often say about her actually, she's a full blown keyboard warrior.

Your rants aren't spicy, Hambo. They make you look ten times more insecure.
 
What's sad is YDHB is definitely an egotistical fuck head with a shocking superiority complex (and an issue with believing herself to be a true and honest intellectual) but Hambo still wants to be her. She only gets this irate if she's jealous of someone.

Neither of their channels would be doing much if it wasn't for the larger surrounding Haydur audience. Both Fat Cunt and Slightly Less Fat Cunt rely on consistent drama to keep going.
I'll never get bored of ALR trying to appear mature and ''catty''.

That's one thing I don't think people often say about her actually, she's a full blown keyboard warrior.

Your rants aren't spicy, Hambo. They make you look ten times more insecure.
YDHB needing her ego stroked every week, it's getting fucking old. The ones that speak the loudest are the most insecure.

Edit: Added a comma that didn't need to be added.
 
No legacy is so rich as honesty. - William Shakespeare, All's Well That Ends Well, Act III, Scene 5.

Pity HamberLynn Greed will never know such a legacy. Or any legacy, really. She'll die and be relegated to the hole of insigificance into which so many fall, unloved, unremembered and uncelebrated,

And on that note, just what bullshit has LunchLadyLynn served up for us today?

I've been keeping things from you | ozempic week 1, health, etc. | vlog 2 - July 31, 2022​


You keep loads of things from us, Hamber. This won't be anything new at all. Roll that film.

Grrr. "Hello. Welcome to a new vloggity vlog." Were you trying to make air quotes or trying to toss up yo gangsta hand deuces? Either way: fail. And your intro sucks.

July 16, 2022, so she claims. Also feels the need to tell us her sad titties are not being carried in a bra. Like anyone could tell. They sag either way. "Let's normalize" not wearing a bra. Hate to tell you this, Fatty, but it's already normalized. Once again, late to a trend. "I decided to put my hair down, just in case." Just in case of what, exactly? You think someone is gonna be so rattled by your lack of a bra it might cause hem to keel over? Nobody gives a shit about your sad tits.

She has "officially started" A Little Life. On the fucking Kindle she bought. And she's made it to page 26. Hamber's Book Club review: Nothing has happened and one of them has really bad laygs. Why the fuck bother talking about it, then? Note: I have read this book, and she will never finish it.

Got a new memory card but hasn't bothered to put it in yet. Of course, jut start the new vlog with the memory card you know is glitchy, because you're too lazy to put it in. Or too dainty, and you need your My Gorlfriend, Wifey, to put it in, like you've never handled memory cards before. Cunt.

She bought some fucking plastic organizer thing that's too big for her desk or something, because she can't be bothered to measure anything. So instead of using it for her desk, she's going to use it to organize her earrings, and didn't we already have to fucking go through this already? The great reorg of the earrings, all separated by colors. So what you're telling us, Fat Ham, is that after all that, you went right back to your stupid, slovenly ways, like those fucking hoarders on the show who can't let go of a scrap of newspaper that was used to wrap fish or something else gross.

Blah blah, her failed foray into business,she got rid of most of the earrings, and still couldn't be bothered to keep them organized. I'd really like to reach through the screen and punch her fat fucking smug face. I'm skipping this bullshit.

Hamber and her My Gorlfriend, Wifey, are loving the storm. Not even a thought for the people who died in that storm as it raced across KY and other states. But hell, all she watches is trashy reality TV and YT, and never the news, so I guess EmpathLynn wouldn't know anything about that shit.

She swapped the memory card. She blathers on here about memory cards and cameras and nobody cares.

"It is the next day." with a date of July 18 on the screen. We started on July 16, with no July 17 noted. You suck at this, Hamber. Really.

She's having an apple, which she "cut up into fours". Not quartered. Not cut into fourths. Fours. Like a first grader would say. Poured her sugary protein shake into a plastic Starbucks togo cup. Thought plastic gave you the creeps, Hamber, because it made things "taste funny" like you and your one fucking tastebud would know anything about taste.

"There's a lot that I've been keeping from you guys. Some things are stupider than others." I bet they're all stupid. Because you're stupid. So it goes with the territory.

First one: emergency tooth removal. Spins up a tale of brushing her teeth 7-10 times a day post-hysterectomy and I don't believe this shit at all. It sounds like bullshit you'd tell a shrink when you're trying to munchie your way into an adult ADHD or OCD diagnosis. Claims she ruined her teeth by brushing her teeth too much, which is a thing, but it is NOT a Fat Ham thing. The reason your teeth suck is the same reason your weight sucks, your cardio sucks, your sleeping sucks, and your life sucks: YOU DO NOT TAKE CARE OF ANYTHING. You wind up going to the emergency dentist or the ER because of that. Claims she has TMJ, whatever. Claims to have been taking ibuprofen twice a day, every day, for over a month. Rational people would have gone to the fucking dentist. "If it's not one thing, it's another." NO, you fucking thundercunt, it is NOT. You have serial health issues because you are a giant, slovenly pig who doesn't do a single fucking thing to improve any area of your health. AT ALL.

Launches into the bullshit story about the estradiol. She says she called in for a refill. Who the fuck did she cal;l? The doctor's office? So some random new person answers and tells her that they have no record of her being prescribed it AND that she shouldn't be taking it. This is a fucking lie, through and through. Obviously, she's been prescribed it, and it will be in her fucking record, because she's been getting refills, so she says. You cannot get refills if the fucking doctor's office doesn't transmit the order. Also, the front line phone people are not going to fucking tell you that you shouldn't be taking something prescribed for you by a DOCTOR. They are not doctors.

Who did she call? The pharmacy? If it's the same pharmacy she's been going to since she moved there, this is also complete bullshit. She claims the pharmacist tells her they don't have any record of her being prescribed estradiol, which is a lie unless she went to a totally new pharmacy, and that she shouldn't be taking it. A pharmacist would NEVER just say "You shouldn't be taking this, period." That's a great way to get your ass reported to whatever the professional standards board is in that state. Because they don't have your fucking medical history, bitch. Who would have it: the oncologist who fucking prescribed it. (I'll insert here that this is yet another reason I think her cancer story is bullshit.) A pharmacist will tell you what drugs interact poorly with one another, and suggest alternative drugs if the one you're using is being discontinued or coming out of its patent period (hello, flexeril and zofran!) - to be discussed with your DOCTOR.

She does that stupid "What? What?" that lets us all know she's piled heaps of bullshit into this story.

Says the office says they're going to schedule an appointment for her because, she says, "this is super impor-en". Stop eliding the fucking Ts in important. She, of course, starts googling the shit and naturally, DoctorLynn Medicine Woman decides "It's not good." despite having no medical degree, having not studied biology or chemistry, not being an oncologist, etc. IO figure what happened is that someone told her that some people should not take estradiol and she decided she was one of those people. And what is this shit about her taking it "for two years"? She's told us previously that she wasn't taking it, for long stretches at a time. We don't need this whole song and dance nonsense. If you don't want to take it because everything in WebMD ends in cancer, then don't fucking take it. I skipped the rest of the shit where she's pretending she knows anything and telling people that people who have had uterine cancer shouldn't take estradiol, which is bullshit, and Hamber, sine you read here, I'll add this shit to the list of things I will report your videos about. YOU are not a doctor. YOU do not know specifically what types of cancer people have had. YOU do not get to sit here on your bullshit throne and toss out shit like this as if it is fact for every single person. It is not. Do it again. I will report that video, this one, and I will go back through every one of your videos looking for other instances of you trying to dispense medical advice and I will report every fucking one of those, too. Do not fuck with me.

Moving on. Going back for her second shot of Ozempic. Oh, beetus confirmed! I don't give a shit what she claims about her bloodwork being perfect (it likely was not) or not having the beetus (she almost certainly does, because portions of it can be, and are, on her, quite visible). She says the FDA approved it for weight loss, which is partially true. Ozempic is approved for overweight or obese patients with at least one weight-related comorbidity. Like type 2 diabetes, BeetusLynn.

She is so fucking smug. "What is happening? What is happening?"

I'll tell you what's happening: your life is so fucking boring, you go nowhere, so you have this shitty Secret Life of Walter Mitty thing going on to inject into all of your recitations of your nonsense to make it seem as if you have this busy, interesting life. You do not.

A thousand dollars a month. for the weekly shots. Guess that sounds worse than 250/per week. Guess you should have looked into getting some health insurance, eh?

"And I don't like medicine!" You should stop saying this. You love it. You get to play with all those bottles, separating out your pills into new pill holders you buy every two months. You love haughtily informing your audience (that you hate) about all the drugs you're on. And you've now told us that you're going to try to get assessed for adult ADHD, which will mean another drug. Here's a tip: go back to that strip mail shrink in Somerset. Sounds like she'd diagnose a rock with ADHD as long as there's a paycheck involved.

Aw, she didn't lose her appetite. Guess she didn't bother to do her thousands and thousands of hours of research on Ozempic. Chantal insertion, that she is not going to talk about but that she's fucking talking about it. STFU. She hates you, with good reason. "I'm not really a farty person." Oh, fuck OFF with this bullshit. You put out methane just like a fucking cow.

"I do take lamictal and zoloft, and they weren't answering the phone, so I couldn't get my refill. So I have been off my meds for five days." Oh, meds that you don't fucking need for conditions you do not have, that you just ran out of so couldn't take, and that sudden withdrawal made zero difference in your life. Isn't that interesting.

Says she is just trying to be transparent and open and honest, and once again, she's lying. You suck at poker, Hamber. Tells everyone to not take all this shit and run with it or twist it because she's just trying to be honest, blah blah. Go fuck yourself, Hamber, You could fertilize the Gobi with the bullshit you peddle.

And of course - OF COURSE - there are some other "hidden demons I'm dealing with" but she will have to figure out on her own, because she's "not comfortable sharing that". THEN DON'T FUCKING BRING IT UP, YOU FAT FUCKING LYING CUNT.

She is going to go eat the "fours" of her apple and drink her sugar and go to her appointment with her imaginary shrink.


TL;DW/R: Useless bullshit about an apple she cut "into fours", organizing her earrings, again, does her little book club schtick, except it's really about her buying herself a Kindle, hato go pay exorbitant prices at an emergency dentist because she refuse to get herself in shape enough to visit a dentist regularly, and had to have a tooth pulled, spins up some story about some rando in the doctor's office telling her they have no record of the estradiol they prescribed and that she shouldn't be taking it, confirms beetus via disclosing she's going in for her second Ozempic shot, and won't she be surprised when it does not lead to weight loss for her, although it will help with her beetus that she denies she has, claims to not have taken her muh mentalz meds for five days because she's out, yet shows no signs at all of what a sudden withdrawal from maintenance doses would bring, wants people to not take what she has said and twist it - like she does the truth - to "use it against" her, and to that I say fuck her. The End.

Brushing too much is actually bad for your teeth.
She said she'd brush her teeth like 10 times a day and brushing too much can lead to teeth sensitivity and gum issues.
Hamber lies. Her teeth suck because just like the rest of her body, she does not properly care for them.

I typed a huge rant paragraph and ended up just wanting to keep my comments simple.
To summarize from a Nurses perspective:
  1. I’ve never seen Ozempic prescribed for a person who wasn’t pre diabetic or diabetic (it is used for weight loss but only in those with pre diabetes from my experience )
Now also for obesity plus at least one weight-related comorbidity. Like the beetus.


What's sad is YDHB is definitely an egotistical fuck head with a shocking superiority complex (and an issue with believing herself to be a true and honest intellectual)
She seems to think she could hang with Dorothy Parker's inner circle or something.

 
I heard that YDHB smells like coconut oil and has a beautiful man.

Imagine being one of Amber's teeth in this narrative. You spend years rotting and neglected while being expected to work constantly grinding up Amber's crunchy snacks, and then after thirty years of this you start being assaulted 10 times a day just for the mouthfeel. I'd eject myself too.
 
A couple of videos before, right before she stopped filming she was gushing about these Shein earrings.
watch my breakdown_downfall.... _ 500lb gorl _ episode 8 20-40 screenshot.png
And of course, what do I spot in her throw-away pile of old earrings in her last video?
I've been keeping things from you _ ozempic week 1, health, etc. _ vlog 2 4-52 screenshot.png
Now the question is she bought these earrings right then and after they took a couple of weeks to arrive she's throwing them away or she just had THE SAME FUCKING EARRINGS THE ENTIRE FUCKING TIME.
 
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