Turd Fergusson
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jul 28, 2019
Chatting with someone online and never having met her is a penpal, not a girlfriend.
Amberlynn Reid - 600 pound pathological liar and U-Haul lesbian moving in with her next live-in maid/nurse/girlfriend.
- Thread starter PiggyPie
- Start date
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inquizadoor
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jun 1, 2020
Shows us all the trader's joe food she 'didnt even touch' like thats a brag point and not just evidence shes ordering fast food 6 times a day. She lost all her wAtEr wEiGhT and now weighs 489 ellbees.
I am so tired of her blaming weight GAIN on "water weight" and "swelleen" and its not "real" weight gain. But she celebrates every .6 lbs lost.
Spent $500 on ugly fucking torrid. Literally laughed out loud bc she is getting rid of clothes and is going to give a dress to her mom but it "MIGHT be too big" gorl your mom is 1/3 of you. I hope mommy gets pissy about that lol.
Claims she's been in a relationship since Valentine's which I don't fucking believe bc she wouldnt keep it for a secret that long. A gf for 2 months and theyre not living together yet? fake news. she just knows shes boring as fuck and needs a new supporting character besides meth mama.
Boring hair content. Takes unwashed nasty nest out of a bun and calls it 'curls'.
I am so tired of her blaming weight GAIN on "water weight" and "swelleen" and its not "real" weight gain. But she celebrates every .6 lbs lost.
Spent $500 on ugly fucking torrid. Literally laughed out loud bc she is getting rid of clothes and is going to give a dress to her mom but it "MIGHT be too big" gorl your mom is 1/3 of you. I hope mommy gets pissy about that lol.
Claims she's been in a relationship since Valentine's which I don't fucking believe bc she wouldnt keep it for a secret that long. A gf for 2 months and theyre not living together yet? fake news. she just knows shes boring as fuck and needs a new supporting character besides meth mama.
Boring hair content. Takes unwashed nasty nest out of a bun and calls it 'curls'.
- Joined
- Oct 14, 2023
Is it really a relationship if you never fuck?
- Joined
- Feb 15, 2021
Just an FYI because “the more you know”. A Pap smear will only detect cervical cancer. There is a great deal more to “lady bits” than the cervix and vaginal vault. Amber had uterine, aka endometrial cancer, which can only be detected with a biopsy done during a hysteroscopy or D&C. That was the emergency surgery she had while still living in the gaycare. Usually performed under conscious sedation.
- Joined
- Oct 11, 2018
- Joined
- Mar 15, 2020
I agree. I mean, this is the woman who said back then that she didn't vote but wouldn't vote for Hilary Clinton anyway because she "heard that Hilary wants to make NINE MONTH abortions legal". What does she even know about women's bodies? Nothing. She's a moronic child.
- Joined
- Aug 21, 2022
*** VLOG ALERT!! ***
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yFLkru1blW4&t=4s
Invidious: https://yewtu.be/watch?v=yFLkru1blW4
I'm finally SLIGHTLY LESS 'TARDED and (in theory I think I) can get the archive... but it will be low resolution and I don't know how to compress it, and I don't want Null to kill me for wasting his server space with a bloated archive of a bloated tick doing nothing archive-worthy. If you want me to post the archives, let me know and I'll try, but the invidious instances are very effective at removing ads. Nevermind - Bones uploaded the archive while I was typing this.
Plot Summary with Commentary! When we last left our Witless Wonder, Amber was fatsplaining TDEE, complaining about those mythical skinny bitches who can eat TONS of junkfood and never gain weight, and how her body is so special that the first law of thermodynamics doesn't apply to her. Hmm, perhaps she's really an alien from a species that normally only exists in fluidic space? I mean, we ran into a lot of weird shit in there. Nevermind, I'm stalling. What's she up to now? Probably a whole lot of nothing, but let's go check anyway. Take us in!
TL;DR: Amber shows off her hoard of processed food to prove to the haydurz that she didn't eat all of the Trader Joe's junk (and starts getting excited about the stuff she finds in there). Weigh ins (ceiling-shot and filming herself getting on the scale): still just losing and gaining the same 10-20lbs of water and poop weight. Torrid haul (no try on). Panty haul (no try on). LEGO update to segue into talking about how virtual girlfriend has OFFICIALLY been her virtual girlfriend since February 14th. Take THAT DUSTY and REENECKUH! Amazing new hairbrush!
(Edited to fix boneheaded spelling error. As funny as it would be, Amber was not on a SEGWAY)
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yFLkru1blW4&t=4s
Invidious: https://yewtu.be/watch?v=yFLkru1blW4
Plot Summary with Commentary! When we last left our Witless Wonder, Amber was fatsplaining TDEE, complaining about those mythical skinny bitches who can eat TONS of junkfood and never gain weight, and how her body is so special that the first law of thermodynamics doesn't apply to her. Hmm, perhaps she's really an alien from a species that normally only exists in fluidic space? I mean, we ran into a lot of weird shit in there. Nevermind, I'm stalling. What's she up to now? Probably a whole lot of nothing, but let's go check anyway. Take us in!
No intro. Amber shows off all of the Trader Joe's food that she didn't eat, and goes "ooh, I got this recently... kinda want to try that!" She's friggin getting herself EXCITED while showing off her disgusting processed food hoard to her audience.
Different Day: Amber pretends it's a deep-cleaning day. Amber answers the questions in her Kiwi thread about her litter box: she buys new boxes every other month (just like during the Destiny era), except that Amber pretends to clean it daily and deep clean it weekly. Amber pretends that she took Twonk outside for a walk (and not just out the front door for a wee). Ceiling-shot weigh-in of 490.8lbs.
Different Day: Amber films herself standing on the scale: 4:92.6lbs clothed and in slippers. Amber does a nekkid ceiling-shot weigh in to prove that she's acktully a few lbs lighter (489lbs) without her clothes (as if the 0.6% difference matters). There's NO WAY she could have faked that! (Her words). Take that, HAYDURZ! Amber talks about how she went off track but then picked herself back up - which is a total lie, as nothing short of a TRACTOR BEAM could pick Amber up (okay, okay, no more low-blow fat jokes - just the facts). Her mentulz have drastically improved.
(Note: pic 2 is not a zoom of pic 1: these are two separate frames in her vlog)
JUMPCUT!! In the closet. Amber claims that she went to Torrid, then corrects herself that she actually ORDERED from there (don't worry; we know). Amber half-assedly shows off her clothing, which is "sooper-kuh-you-tuh" and "frumpy" (has Amber learned a new word from her mom's word-a-day calendar?). OOOH, Amber bought a new sheer, see-though Blueberry shirt! Amber bought a (likely 6X) fugly bumblebee mumu/dress thingy that even she knows is ugly, so she's going to give it to Kristine and expects her mom to appreciate Amber's oversized and fugly cast-offs. It's been a few months, so Amber has decided that it's time to do another clothing declutter. New underwear haul (don't worry; there's no try-on). So EXPENSIVE!! Amber declares this haul as not a 'hit', but rather a 'miss'.
JUMPCUT!! BATMAN LEGO UPDATE! ARE YOU EXCITED? NEITHER AM I; LET'S GOOO!!!! And ...
WOW, SO not worth 400 Burger Bucks. Amber says it's not finished yet, but I still don't think that it'll be worth $400 when completed, either. If you're gonna blow that kinda money on a LEGO model, the LEGO DeathStar would be more impressive. Or even a LEGO STARSHIP VOYAGER! Hmm... maybe I can get Seven to replicate one for me for my birthday-
OOP, NEVERMIND!! This was all just a clumsy way to segue into talking about VALENTINE (AKA: Amber's virtual gorlfriend).
SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT!!: The mysterious person that she started talking to in September and has supposedly been dating since Valentine's day just asked Amber to be her Valentine!... back on Valentine's Day.
Wait a second, you said that YOU ASKED VALENTINE! Nevermind, don't ask questions, Boolean - this is just Amber trying to build a backstory that she TOTALLY got a gorlfriend before Becky did ... Even though she already technically had a gorlfriend first because she dated Wipey for 2 years. SORRY! Sorry, I'm using logic again. Shut up, Boolean! Nevermind! Amber's totes desirable and for SURE has a gorlfriend... that she's been texting for 8 months and has never met. Amber is very happy with her virtual relationship and totally didn't feel the need to share this (until Destiny shared that she got married). No more SINGLE-LYNN! SO WILD!! (It certainly is...)
JUMPCUT!! In the bathroom opening her Amazon package of a new hairbrush. Hair brushing action and comparison is interrupted by Amber loving the wavy look of her greasy hair. Amber says she just washed it; I want to ask if she used shampoo. Amber acts as if this new hairbrush is EVERYTHEEEN. OKAY, comparison over - POOP-BUN REACTIVATED!!
JUMPCUT!! Time for bed. Byee!!
Different Day: Amber pretends it's a deep-cleaning day. Amber answers the questions in her Kiwi thread about her litter box: she buys new boxes every other month (just like during the Destiny era), except that Amber pretends to clean it daily and deep clean it weekly. Amber pretends that she took Twonk outside for a walk (and not just out the front door for a wee). Ceiling-shot weigh-in of 490.8lbs.
Different Day: Amber films herself standing on the scale: 4:92.6lbs clothed and in slippers. Amber does a nekkid ceiling-shot weigh in to prove that she's acktully a few lbs lighter (489lbs) without her clothes (as if the 0.6% difference matters). There's NO WAY she could have faked that! (Her words). Take that, HAYDURZ! Amber talks about how she went off track but then picked herself back up - which is a total lie, as nothing short of a TRACTOR BEAM could pick Amber up (okay, okay, no more low-blow fat jokes - just the facts). Her mentulz have drastically improved.
(Note: pic 2 is not a zoom of pic 1: these are two separate frames in her vlog)
JUMPCUT!! In the closet. Amber claims that she went to Torrid, then corrects herself that she actually ORDERED from there (don't worry; we know). Amber half-assedly shows off her clothing, which is "sooper-kuh-you-tuh" and "frumpy" (has Amber learned a new word from her mom's word-a-day calendar?). OOOH, Amber bought a new sheer, see-though Blueberry shirt! Amber bought a (likely 6X) fugly bumblebee mumu/dress thingy that even she knows is ugly, so she's going to give it to Kristine and expects her mom to appreciate Amber's oversized and fugly cast-offs. It's been a few months, so Amber has decided that it's time to do another clothing declutter. New underwear haul (don't worry; there's no try-on). So EXPENSIVE!! Amber declares this haul as not a 'hit', but rather a 'miss'.
JUMPCUT!! BATMAN LEGO UPDATE! ARE YOU EXCITED? NEITHER AM I; LET'S GOOO!!!! And ...
WOW, SO not worth 400 Burger Bucks. Amber says it's not finished yet, but I still don't think that it'll be worth $400 when completed, either. If you're gonna blow that kinda money on a LEGO model, the LEGO DeathStar would be more impressive. Or even a LEGO STARSHIP VOYAGER! Hmm... maybe I can get Seven to replicate one for me for my birthday-
OOP, NEVERMIND!! This was all just a clumsy way to segue into talking about VALENTINE (AKA: Amber's virtual gorlfriend).
SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT!!: The mysterious person that she started talking to in September and has supposedly been dating since Valentine's day just asked Amber to be her Valentine!... back on Valentine's Day.
Wait a second, you said that YOU ASKED VALENTINE! Nevermind, don't ask questions, Boolean - this is just Amber trying to build a backstory that she TOTALLY got a gorlfriend before Becky did ... Even though she already technically had a gorlfriend first because she dated Wipey for 2 years. SORRY! Sorry, I'm using logic again. Shut up, Boolean! Nevermind! Amber's totes desirable and for SURE has a gorlfriend... that she's been texting for 8 months and has never met. Amber is very happy with her virtual relationship and totally didn't feel the need to share this (until Destiny shared that she got married). No more SINGLE-LYNN! SO WILD!! (It certainly is...)
JUMPCUT!! In the bathroom opening her Amazon package of a new hairbrush. Hair brushing action and comparison is interrupted by Amber loving the wavy look of her greasy hair. Amber says she just washed it; I want to ask if she used shampoo. Amber acts as if this new hairbrush is EVERYTHEEEN. OKAY, comparison over - POOP-BUN REACTIVATED!!
JUMPCUT!! Time for bed. Byee!!
TL;DR: Amber shows off her hoard of processed food to prove to the haydurz that she didn't eat all of the Trader Joe's junk (and starts getting excited about the stuff she finds in there). Weigh ins (ceiling-shot and filming herself getting on the scale): still just losing and gaining the same 10-20lbs of water and poop weight. Torrid haul (no try on). Panty haul (no try on). LEGO update to segue into talking about how virtual girlfriend has OFFICIALLY been her virtual girlfriend since February 14th. Take THAT DUSTY and REENECKUH! Amazing new hairbrush!
(Edited to fix boneheaded spelling error. As funny as it would be, Amber was not on a SEGWAY)
Last edited:
- Joined
- Feb 3, 2022
There's no feet in those slippers. BET.
And lol @ never removing the sticker from the display
And lol @ never removing the sticker from the display
Mekahineyho
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Dec 13, 2022
Yay! Amber has a new gf that she can have performative off camera conversations with, that sound like awkward coworkers in the break room. And I’m sure she loves them so so so much! Crossing fingers that we at least get a livestream in the next couple months where she shits all over Jade and slips up and says something racist
- Joined
- Dec 16, 2019
She looks dirty.
What self-respecting made up penpal "girlfriend" would want to be associated with someone who goes around looking like that?
What self-respecting made up penpal "girlfriend" would want to be associated with someone who goes around looking like that?
- Joined
- Feb 6, 2021
Yeah, you have a gorlfriend yet look like a homeless person. This is just phantom weight numbers but this time a person. Then she will make a vlog saying "Why does no one believe me!" It's because you are the equivalent of a 10-year-old adhd kid in class chatting bullshit.
As for her cancer reveal DLC being funny. The idea of this dumpy woman running inside gulping to try and cry and scream to the internet announcing she has cancer. It's just surreal but then she talked shit about Mendi and Norma, she leaked that she had cancer because of a cancer-themed shopping trip that was cross-referenced to family Facebook accounts. Is it fucked up admittedly yes but honestly for her I just am apathetic because she had 7 years of people warning her. With Amber, as of now, I am just watching how desperate and boring she gets because the vlogs ain't it sis.
As for her cancer reveal DLC being funny. The idea of this dumpy woman running inside gulping to try and cry and scream to the internet announcing she has cancer. It's just surreal but then she talked shit about Mendi and Norma, she leaked that she had cancer because of a cancer-themed shopping trip that was cross-referenced to family Facebook accounts. Is it fucked up admittedly yes but honestly for her I just am apathetic because she had 7 years of people warning her. With Amber, as of now, I am just watching how desperate and boring she gets because the vlogs ain't it sis.
- Joined
- Jul 11, 2020
Amber: Yes I have a girlfriend. You wouldn’t know her, she goes to a different school, erm, lives in CANADA.
Farmers and Karina Kaboom:
Farmers and Karina Kaboom:
Is she really LIVINGGGG for her hair right now in that video? It's GREASY AS FUCK. Am I the only one who sees' it? I understand for women mainly you shouldn't wash your hair everyday but her hair just looks always so fucking dirty, and when it doesn't- it looks brittle, broken, and dry.
Not Al dating Foody Beauty ...
- Joined
- Dec 13, 2022
We're almost to 2019 levels of grease only this time she's really proud of it. She wants us to talk about how dirty she is. It's all she has left to get views.
Even more 8008135
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Dec 12, 2022
What a fucking life.
- Joined
- Aug 21, 2022
I was reading Sabine's comments while watching her video, and caught this in her comments section:
Rolling dice like knives on a platter,
Screaming out that Fat Lives Matter.
Free like a pigeon, or maggots on a train,
Weight-loss journey, here we go again!
(written by YouTube commenter @christopherneale823 - welcome to being dragged to the farms!)
Dunno why I bothered to look, but if you're curious about how the scale functions, here's the MASSIVE (sarcasm - it's only 1 page) manual:
Long story short: no tare function. It only has a button to change from kilos to "el-beez", and a switch for talking/no talking. Now, she COULD easily screw up how it reads her by putting a handtowel/facecloth under the scale. She had to bend down to place the scale in the centre of the floor, so she could have done that.
I'm not saying necessarily that she DID do that, but she could have. Remember during the Destiny era (I think) how she kept insisting that she was losing weight and the scale said so. When her audience refused to accept it, she then confessed that one of the cats (Rarity?) batted a pen under the scale. She said it was messing up how the scale was reading her and admitted that after clearing out the pen and weighing herself again, she was heavier. Just putting that out there because Amber LOVES to use the Red Herring of "everyone accuses me of using the tare when I don't know how to do that". In reality when she would manipulate the scales, she NEVER would tare them to do so.
But hey, it IS possible that she's losing weight. She's supposedly been trying to seal the deal with a new potential girlfriend for SEVERAL MONTHS now. This has been the longest that she's ever had to be on good behaviour to trap someone. Combining that with no Thumb Butler to do 3am McDonalds runs and not enough income for daily UberEats, that would be enough to drop her out of the 500s. (Edit: it worked in early 2020 when Becky was too zombified to do midnight food runs and they lived in an area with no DoorDash/UberEats). It's just confusing to me because it doesn't look like she's LOSING it, but rather it's sliding down her body and collecting in her legs.
Rolling dice like knives on a platter,
Screaming out that Fat Lives Matter.
Free like a pigeon, or maggots on a train,
Weight-loss journey, here we go again!
(written by YouTube commenter @christopherneale823 - welcome to being dragged to the farms!)
Dunno why I bothered to look, but if you're curious about how the scale functions, here's the MASSIVE (sarcasm - it's only 1 page) manual:
Long story short: no tare function. It only has a button to change from kilos to "el-beez", and a switch for talking/no talking. Now, she COULD easily screw up how it reads her by putting a handtowel/facecloth under the scale. She had to bend down to place the scale in the centre of the floor, so she could have done that.
I'm not saying necessarily that she DID do that, but she could have. Remember during the Destiny era (I think) how she kept insisting that she was losing weight and the scale said so. When her audience refused to accept it, she then confessed that one of the cats (Rarity?) batted a pen under the scale. She said it was messing up how the scale was reading her and admitted that after clearing out the pen and weighing herself again, she was heavier. Just putting that out there because Amber LOVES to use the Red Herring of "everyone accuses me of using the tare when I don't know how to do that". In reality when she would manipulate the scales, she NEVER would tare them to do so.
But hey, it IS possible that she's losing weight. She's supposedly been trying to seal the deal with a new potential girlfriend for SEVERAL MONTHS now. This has been the longest that she's ever had to be on good behaviour to trap someone. Combining that with no Thumb Butler to do 3am McDonalds runs and not enough income for daily UberEats, that would be enough to drop her out of the 500s. (Edit: it worked in early 2020 when Becky was too zombified to do midnight food runs and they lived in an area with no DoorDash/UberEats). It's just confusing to me because it doesn't look like she's LOSING it, but rather it's sliding down her body and collecting in her legs.
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Atrax_Morgue_Dat_Pussy
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- May 31, 2023
At this point the only hope for her channel (at least for me) is watching her decline visually and sadly, due to filters, we ain't gonna see all of it's glory.
I amazed she hasn't resorted to live streaming like so many other cows out there have; I guess between the money she makes and the fact she is too stupid to explore the world and develop other vices than eating means her meager income is enough for her.
Which sucks milk wise. We need more self-destructive actions (Gunt and random men/drugs, Cobra and duster/his trolls, Blade and jagger, etc.)
That's why I hoping a serious health scare will prompt our girl to start ebegging via livestream and thus she becomes the angry disgusting cunt we know she is.
I amazed she hasn't resorted to live streaming like so many other cows out there have; I guess between the money she makes and the fact she is too stupid to explore the world and develop other vices than eating means her meager income is enough for her.
Which sucks milk wise. We need more self-destructive actions (Gunt and random men/drugs, Cobra and duster/his trolls, Blade and jagger, etc.)
That's why I hoping a serious health scare will prompt our girl to start ebegging via livestream and thus she becomes the angry disgusting cunt we know she is.
- Joined
- Oct 20, 2017
It looked like she had a Breeze catbox in Lexington. If she couldn’t keep up with that, she’s definitely just tossing the boxes when they get full.
For me it's still very possible that her scale broke and doesn't work correct anymore but because it's in her favor she doesn't care to double check.