Amberlynn Reid - 600 pound pathological liar and U-Haul lesbian moving in with her next live-in maid/nurse/girlfriend.

[Diet Coke 4 Life]

Late, but whatever - I'm stuck on the topic of her faking crunches.

Since this hephalump refuses to get into a swimsuit (even one of those that's modest for deathfats) and utilize The Henry's amenities, she could easily get core workouts by doing isometric bear crawls.

These are what I'm talking about.

Yes, her gunt would be pressed against the floor. But just the effort of getting her knees up and holding this for 30 seconds (or longer if she can) would be a fantastic core workout. Because let's face it, she's too rotund for just about any core-focused exercise that doesn't utilize a pool to get around the issue of FAT. Planks? Nope. Practically any yoga pose? Nope. Actual crunches or situps? Don't make me laugh. But isometric bear crawls would be in her reach.

Let's be frank, though. That's actually a workout, so she won't do it.

 

[The Heartthrob]

How do you think she reads books? I imagine her getting hung up on really simple words like "risen" and not taking a moment to understand what they mean or how they're pronounced. It'd make the most sense with how Grammarlynn acts despite how often she claims to read.

 

[Boolean Bitch]

....Let's be frank, though. That's actually a workout, so she won't do it.

AUGH!! I wish I had read your full post before starting my response to you.

I was so enthusiastic about Amber doing Aqua-Aeorbics, I even found the perfectly dainty and fashionable pool outfit for her ... the BURKINI!!:

She doesn't have to show her laygs. She could get a headpiece to help contain some of the sebum. They go up to XXXXXXL sizes in SEVERAL different styles and colours! Oh, and they have a nice little dainty skirt to go over the laygeeens.

I even found her a website to purchase them online, as their shop is more than a 1:12 walk from her porch door:

Plus Size Burkini | Plus Size Muslim Swimwear | Burkini Remsa

Alternatives to Plus Size Burkini Discounted Burkini (19) 19 products Islamic Swimwear (206) 206 products Muslim Swimwear (198) 198 products Plus Size Modest Swimwear...

www.burkiniremsa.com

How could she go wrong? The company proclaims:

Love Your Body and Catch Elegance With Burkini Models!​

We took care to keep the size options quite wide and excessive. You ask why? Because we know that a true style is not about weight. You will find comfort on the beach with the most impressive burkini models that will reflect your free spirit.

Edited to Add: Ah, nevermind. Perhaps Chantal will find this information useful...

 

[pistolwhipped]

How do you think she reads books? I imagine her getting hung up on really simple words like "risen" and not taking a moment to understand what they mean or how they're pronounced. It'd make the most sense with how Grammarlynn acts despite how often she claims to read.

Hamby will read anything except a self-help book.

 

[FatalTater]

Only been up for 4 hours and her lying about shrimpgate video already has over 7,000 views.
Bitch knows how to play her audience like the fools they keep proving they are.

Shrimpgate was never about shrimp. It was about FailureLynn smugly lying to everyone about everything.
Sabine Davis rallied folks to unsubscribe. Unfortunately Amber made a fake apology video and her audience ate it up with a spoon and begged for more.

Using old clips won't make her look any younger in the current day, but I would bet that's why she's doing it. Lifestyle and age are catching up to LiarLynn.

 

[dfranki723]

Please, we all know she has watched the shrimp video in order to prepare perfect comments she can make to seem mature/wise/funny/quirky.

Oh she was sooooo respectful of her roommates guy! Remember that time she refused to blur out the license plate on their car? She's a compassionate Kuh Ween.
She gazes at herself in the way a Mother gazes at her newborn, it's sick. How can somebody this nasty adore themselves so intensely?

Get out of here with your Peter Griffin looking ass.

For fucksake Fat Cunt, the difference between smokers and obese people is that SMOKERS do not demand sympathy and ass pats for developing any illness caused by their smoking, 90% of people your size cry about their self inflicted problems and get upset when people point it out. A smoker isn't delusional about their bad habit, the same can't be said about Hamber.

I know she's a retard but come on.
My God...
The reason people don't say anything about ''skinny'' mukbangers is because they clearly eat healthily outside of the mukbangs. YOU ARE GIGANTIC AND CLEARLY EAT MORE THAN YOU SHOULD OFF CAMERA. Nevermind the constant sympathy grabs with your pretend eating disorders, pretty sure the thin mukbangers don't do that either.

I can't watch the whole thing, she's such a fucking bellend and the smugness is off the charts.
FattyLynn is fat and stupid.

 

[BBygorls_Laayggs]

How do you think she reads books? I imagine her getting hung up on really simple words like "risen" and not taking a moment to understand what they mean or how they're pronounced. It'd make the most sense with how Grammarlynn acts despite how often she claims to read.

she dont.. i swear during bucky era, it was exposed that she just listens to the audiobooks and buy books to make it seem like she reads.

 

[Situation Type Deal Gorl]

Oh my fucking god.

I have many, many thoughts about this bullshit video.

One thought that immediately springs to mind, though, is that Hamber really is trying to get to 600 pounds.

Edit: STOP FUCKING USING "ACTIVE" IN RELATION TO YOURSELF, YOU FUCKING CUNT.

 

[CloverKitty]

Please, we all know she has watched the shrimp video in order to prepare perfect comments she can make to seem mature/wise/funny/quirky.

Oh she was sooooo respectful of her roommates guy! Remember that time she refused to blur out the license plate on their car? She's a compassionate Kuh Ween.
She gazes at herself in the way a Mother gazes at her newborn, it's sick. How can somebody this nasty adore themselves so intensely?

Get out of here with your Peter Griffin looking ass.

For fucksake Fat Cunt, the difference between smokers and obese people is that SMOKERS do not demand sympathy and ass pats for developing any illness caused by their smoking, 90% of people your size cry about their self inflicted problems and get upset when people point it out. A smoker isn't delusional about their bad habit, the same can't be said about Hamber.

I know she's a retard but come on.
My God...
The reason people don't say anything about ''skinny'' mukbangers is because they clearly eat healthily outside of the mukbangs. YOU ARE GIGANTIC AND CLEARLY EAT MORE THAN YOU SHOULD OFF CAMERA. Nevermind the constant sympathy grabs with your pretend eating disorders, pretty sure the thin mukbangers don't do that either.

I can't watch the whole thing, she's such a fucking bellend and the smugness is off the charts.
FattyLynn is fat and stupid.

It’s absolutely wild to me how she thinks she’s on the wrong side of the double standard of food vs drug addicts- ie believes SHES the one who gets more flack than the latter.
Lmao, like if a junkie made a “recovery” channel, and live streamed themselves shooting 1/10th as much dope as they previously did (bc “I’m not perfect you guise it’s still a step in the right direction!”), there wouldn’t even be one retarded white knight saying “it’s her channel guise she can do what she wants! Don’t like it don’t watch!”…. No, they’d be universally called out for their filthy degenerate behavior, no matter what the context was (let alone under any pretense of “recovery”). There wouldn’t be (as far as I know anyway), the junk-admirer equivalent of feeders, paying them to nod out on camera & praising their blown out veins. There’s no “junk acceptance”, “tobacco acceptance”, people calling dissenters of the latter “smokeaphobes”, & so on.
And no, “yOu NeEd tO eAt To SurViVe” is NOT a valid rationale for the relative social acceptability Hammy and other food addicts enjoy, compared to addicts of other substances. Seeing as how in Hammys case, 4K of the 5k calories she consumes each and every day to maintain her absolute mammoth weight are NOT, in fact, nourishing her/providing sustenance (on the contrary, theyre actually doing the complete opposite as her body doesn’t even know where to store the additional energy, struggling to function during her continuous, unrelenting abuse of herself).
In the face of (very much warranted) criticism she receives, Hammy loves to so ever-so-smugly proclaim how “everyone’s different” in her own defense. Touché, Hammy, indeed they are! Not solely when it suits your narrative, either! And this is precisely why it isn’t rly seen as a big deal when a thin person films themselves having a foodgasm over an indulgent meal vs. when a half-ton, bedbound, lifelong food addict does the same thing. Imagine that!
In my (and I’d hope anyone else with an iota of common fucking sense’s) mind, there is absolutely nothing any less depraved & fucked up about said bedbound half ton behemoth shovelling fast food in during a mukbang for a live audience, when compared to a hypothetical junkie shooting up into an abscess, or a hypothetical smoker smoking a pack via their tracheostomy, on social media for live viewers.

 

[Echnaton]

Wouldn't she be basically suffocating if she were to lay on her back and attempt crunches? I'm even being a dick, is that not a big issue for fat fucks?

Why does she choose to add the least believable exercises to her routine?

Not really. Unless they have particularly gigantic tits and tight clothes preventing sideways movement, the fat will mostly go to the sides a bit, kinda like a flattened balloon I guess?

And yes, no way someone her weight can do crunches. I mean, theoretically possible... And maybe there is one gigafat capable of such a feat, but the concept of someone 600 pounds casually being strong enough to do crunches is utterly insane, that person would be strong enough to demolish buildings by walking into them

I don't think Amber could even get up from a lying position on the floor. She seems comically weak and inept, at that weight such an operation unironically requires a bit of thinking and skill

 

[beanbag in a hurry]

 

[FatalTater]

I wanna SEE Amber do a crunch.
I want to see how she manages to lay down on the floor with that GIANT SHELF ASS in the way.

I bet she just leans back on the couch and briefly tightens her abdominal muscles and calls that a crunch.

 

[ADHD]

Just before shrimpgate was the Optavia arc where Amber spent $400 on shitty chip-like snacks, dirt shakes, and meal bars (likely made from newsprint) and quit by day 2. And her reason was that other people were eating chips and hotdogs and she couldn't. She even admitted that's why she looked for an excuse to quit, and finally decided that it was too low calorie (despite her body at the time holding at least 1 million surplus calories in fat).

Clip for those who haven't seen it before:

Following her account losing about 8-15k subs (don't remember the exact number, but she had JUST made 100k on her channel)

She lost almost 8k before she started gaining them back.

Spoiler

Amber posted a cunty mukbang showing her powering through a party-sized shrimpring, telling her audience that we aren't her parents, and it's wrong that we only support her when she's doing "what we want" (when she's not clickbaiting her health or self-diagnosed mental illnesses).

And let's not forget the cherry on top:

What followed that was 15 days of pretending to give a shit. Walkeeen on the spot for less than 2 minutes at a time, 'arm-ups' with bright pink 2lb weights (sound familiar?), a legitimate weigh in, and a focus on preparing 'hulthy' meals (which looked like dog food), while not eating them on camera, but still pushing the boundaries with 'taste tests'.

 

[The Heartthrob]

Hamby will read anything except a self-help book.

She got The Body Keeps The Score in the mail, which will make a cute aesthetic plant stand for a suck-a-lint.

 

[Cornfed]

It is like a bad acid trip watching her react to herself, and miss the entire fucking point that everyone makes.
Her agreeing with herself has led her to be a housebound hippo, and she misses it completely.
She is so painfully stupid.
How is possible for someone so fat, ugly, stupid, and just bankrupt of personality or thought be so damn smug about her pathetic life?

 

[Constellationzero]

I wanna SEE Amber do a crunch.
I want to see how she manages to lay down on the floor with that GIANT SHELF ASS in the way.

I bet she just leans back on the couch and briefly tightens her abdominal muscles and calls that a crunch.

She squats well over 600 pounds any time she gets up off the couch or the terlet. She's gotta be RIPPED (lol, no)

@Cornfed, just ask Jennifer Armstrong.

Oh, wait...

 

[Suspicious Activity]

I love the Amber thread. Some excellent contributors and witty writing. My thanks to @Situation Type Deal Gorl @Boolean Bitch and @Diet Coke 4 Life and others I know I missed. I can’t contribute much back because I refuse to watch her
So took a dive into these Skinny Mukbangers who get no hate.

Spoiler

On any off topic , stuff, if I’m talking about threads ….Ambers being boring. Chantal’s being boring on-and-off. Take up a new cow.
I must always advise anyone looking to take on reading a new thread from the beginning….do it, it’s great to get the lore of more threads. It gives you an appreciation of all the deep magic in kIwi Farms….read the Amy Ramadan thread, it is, by far, the funniest thread I’ve read on the site. Mostly thanks to @StrawberryDouche./ shilling.
So
I hear Amber complain that ‘skinny mukbangers don’t get hate….so…

• I found a relatively recent, active, skinny mukbanger to see if she gets hate.
• I found Katina Eats Kilos. https://youtube.com/@KatinaEatsKilos What do you do that means you don’t get hate?
• She seems to be sweet and have a friendly, outgoing personality and a flair for presenting her videos. She also has a professional setup, camera and mic, and cares for quality over quantity (except for the food, obviously).
• She travels with her ‘Boo Thang’ (cringe) who also eats competitively.
• They go around America and Europe and most recently Australia….so they keep it interesting.
• She spends hours at the gym. She trains by expanding her stomach with salads. She runs every day. And I believe she does half marathons too.

She looks like she has bulimia cheeks to me, but I might be wrong, and this is what happens when you are chewing as much as she is…and the exercise does the rest. I realise it’s a form of bulimia, but it seems a healthy enough one.

So, does she get hate. None that I found. I’m fact some eating disordered fans say that her enthusiasm for food and the fun she has, has helped their fears of food and gave themselves permission to enjoy food again.

Amber couldn’t do the exercise part, but maybe if she had a good quality setup, travelled to interesting places (even one’s close to home) and engaged their audience with a bubbly personality, she could eat and not get quite so much hate.

What Katina does not do…..

• Lie.
• Bore audiences with colouring, dead air whilst she reads/combs her hair/moves containers around. Clean counters.
• Call her subscribers names
• Click bait titles.

She does

• Be fun, engaging, chatty and informative about her food, restaurants

 

[FarmVille]

“Look at me there, I mean, I was at my heaviest” she says to a video of herself looking exactly the same.

 

[marjoram]

FFS. Lie me a river fatass.

She is totally unwatchable; I'm weak, I just can't do it, so much thanks to the brave and stoic re-cappers.

Also- "Arm-ups" was hilarious in the Krystal era and it's hilarious now. FatAl has SUCH a way with words, so obviously a wordsmith of great skill and weight.
Obviously.

 

[Situation Type Deal Gorl]

I think I'm going to leave this one to the fine context and summary of @Boolean Bitch because otherwise this is a two parter and it'll be like livecapping MSHPL. This smug bitch watching her 600 ellbee self pound shrimp, nodding along, and eyefucking herself in the camera as if she isn't returning right to that despite telling us how she's now

CHANGED, my brother, the LAWD has CHANGED ME and my RELATIONS with FOOD!

No, Hamber, you definitely fucked that shrimp. And that rotisserie chicken. And all the other crap you shove down your gob. Don't try telling us you've been eating healthy this past year when you're obviously gaining weight.

While we're at it, STOP trying to come up with metaphors, because you are so incredibly stupid, yours make no sense. The last one was some dipshittery about putting someone in a cage with lions and tigers, and that was pretty stupid. but you outdid yourself with this bullshit about how people aren't ragging on smokers about stopping smoking. Tell you what, you fat cunt: go find us a YT channel that started out saying they're starting their channel to hold themselves accountable to stopping smoking, and then spent the next ten years chain-smoking on camera for YTBux, lecturing, scolding, blaming, and gaslighting their audience the entire time, avoiding any microscopic speck of responsibility for their habit. Go ahead. We'll wait.

While we wait, I'll tell you another thing: I DGAF what other YTers do in comparison to you.

I'm gonna toss one other thing in here from the shrimpgate video itself, because it's always bugged me, and I don't recall anyone saying anything about it - and why would they, when there was so much more to talk about?

It's when she is blathering about how "you guise only see one mill out of, what, fifteen that I eat in a week? How is that going to decipher blah bla..."

Fifteen mills a week? Three mills a day? Does she take weekends off from eating? Looking at her grotesque size, I think not. Hell, she was probably getting fifteen mills down that gullet in three days.

TL; didn't whatever: SmugCondescendingLynn from Shrimpgate is back again, trying to gaslight people. It makes me laugh, since it could really only be directed at the frogs, but they're gone. Just like her thanking them for blowing smoke up her ass didn't come until weeks after they showed up and they were already gone by then. But that's the Hamber we know, isn't it? Late to TikTok, late to trends, late to everything except those aforementioned mills.

Edit, for anyone who is going to watch this ep of the shitshow: As in the last vid, her vocal fry imitation is back in this one.