Amberlynn Reid - 600 pound pathological liar and U-Haul lesbian moving in with her next live-in maid/nurse/girlfriend.

[Situation Type Deal Gorl]

OK, I knew I was not losing my mind. Earlier today, I looked at her cameo bullshit - WHO is paying this bitch for these asinine messages? Specifically, I'm referring to this one. In it, she tells whoever it is that it's for that she wants to share a poem she wrote in 2022:

You sat next to me and I could smell the cherries in your hair.
You smiled at me without knowing you were the reason I wore my favorite shirt

I swore to myself that she had read this to us before. She did. (cued)

Why lie? She really is pathological.


Edit: does anyone know when she last left the house for anything other than appointments that require her to physically be there? The last I remember is the cave lights at xmas.

 

[Triple Flutz]

Edit: does anyone know when she last left the house for anything other than appointments that require her to physically be there? The last I remember is the cave lights at xmas.

I can't verify because I've been solely living off ree-caps which lack the visual component that helps me keeping my dates straight, but-

Amber is a smelly, pathetic coward and lies in every way you can lie. She refuses to go out and make content. The last video she showed herself out of the house in any significance was FIVE MONTHS AGO DURING VLOGMAS 2022 AT TARGET. None of this hypothetical, fake weightloss surgery arc makes any sense.

 

[Smiling with air]

Thank god I wasn’t the only one who noticed the ass jiggle. Like Situation Type Deal I had to watch it a few times to actually take in what I was witnessing.

We haven’t had a weigh in for months and there’s one thing I do know she ain’t losing any weight at all. Love that for her!

 

[marjoram]

OK, I knew I was not losing my mind. Earlier today, I looked at her cameo bullshit - WHO is paying this bitch for these asinine messages? Specifically, I'm referring to this one. In it, she tells whoever it is that it's for that she wants to share a poem she wrote in 2022:

You sat next to me and I could smell the cherries in your hair.
You smiled at me without knowing you were the reason I wore my favorite shirt

I swore to myself that she had read this to us before. She did. (cued)

View attachment 4997245

Why lie? She really is pathological.


Edit: does anyone know when she last left the house for anything other than appointments that require her to physically be there? The last I remember is the cave lights at xmas.

FatAl should reeeally not remind people of her "poetry". But since she did...

For any newfags who really hate themselves--
helloodaarling on wattpad.

It is bolth utter shit and hilarious.

 

[Xenomorph]

rofl Cherries remind Amber of her Mother so...Amber wants to fug her Mother?

 

[Constellationzero]

She would need a pilot vehicle and this:

She'd need a couple tarmac workers. UNDISTRACTED tarmac workers. No asking them where the urnge chikin is in Lexington, or you'll get another fall, dangleeeeeeeen feet situation type deal molment that'll look like this:

 

[Goatchoker]

She'd need a couple tarmac workers. UNDISTRACTED tarmac workers. No asking them where the urnge chikin is in Lexington, or you'll get another fall, dangleeeeeeeen feet situation type deal molment that'll look like this:

View attachment 4998596

nah roll her in to a c-17 with a heavy, whining payload tag and she’ll be cleared for takeoff.

 

[Situation Type Deal Gorl]

I can't verify because I've been solely living off ree-caps which lack the visual component that helps me keeping my dates straight, but-

Ah, thanks! I thought someone had been tracking this. Good thing, because damn, Hamber's boring af and the thought of going back and trying to find it was not appealing.

Thank god I wasn’t the only one who noticed the ass jiggle. Like Situation Type Deal I had to watch it a few times to actually take in what I was witnessing.

We haven’t had a weigh in for months and there’s one thing I do know she ain’t losing any weight at all. Love that for her!

One of her many tells.

rofl Cherries remind Amber of her Mother so...Amber wants to fug her Mother?

"Hey, mom, I was thinking of you as I unpacked my tent-sized underwear. Love you!"

nah roll her in to a c-17 with a heavy, whining payload tag and she’ll be cleared for takeoff.

Too bad the Russians destroyed the Antonov. It would have come in handy.

 

[Ben Lurkin']

...a poem she wrote in 2022:

That Edge-garFalieenPoemLynn metaphor was very, very telling: Anything Hamber is loveen has to be associated with food.

"You sat next to me and I could smell the cherries that lived in your hair."​

WTF? Cherries liveen in someone's hair? How? Dangleen from their cherry tree limb antlers?

"Metaphor," Amber...I do not think that word means what you think it means.

K...let's fix this..."poem."

A more descriptive "lived in...hair" metaphor would be to create a creature liveen in Hamber's own unwashed top-knot.*

So...let's devise a fantasy critter as a metaphor that represents FatAl's perpetually filthy follicles:

"Hamber sat next to me and I could see the 'sebum-eating oil weevils' that lived in her hair."​

​

* Fer Godsake, OilyAl, get Wipey to help you wash UR oleaginous mop, or just get that shit (you think UR hiding behind) todally chopped off.

 

[pippeyyy]

On the subjet of Amber and babies: when she was with Dusty she began talking about wanting kids but not carrying one. That was Dusty's dream. She would play with dolls in stores, strollers, baby clothes, etc while Dusty would talk about how much she wanted to be pregnant.

When she was with Becky, in the beginning, both of them would always say "NO!" when asked about kids. She'd sometimes say adopting is important but never her being pregnant. (around her 123 reasons to lose weight New Year resolution time) Then "cancer" happened and it became her one and only dream to carry a child.

Outside of Dusty she has never seen her partners as capable of carrying a child since part of the appeal is the attention pregnant women receive. Amber also never, ever mentioned having a boy. To her it was always a girl. In make-believe land if she found out she was pregnant with a boy that fetus would get yeeted quick.


TLDR: Amber wants a child as much as she wants to be thin. Sounds good in theory but neither can be solved with UberEats so it's not worth the energy.
There's a Youtube video showing how often her and Dusty would play with dolls and whine about babies.

 

[StrawberryDouche]

Amber pointing at and touching everything. Those were they days, my friend.

 

[Guntal Marie]

Fuck MG,W or any other caretaker she traps that ever wishes to be a mother. It's Hamber's baby or an adopted one she picks out from the store, or nothing.

 

[lol cow supreme]

Amber is a lesbian who's brain made her unattracted from being able to breed, and then ate her way to infertility ensuring she cant breed... but she is so sad she wishes was a mother and things she has so much love etc to give.
Amber sounds like a victim of identiy politics who got brainwashed to being lesbian or trans etc and is now living in regret of not having that trad mother with a husband life. She will never admit it. but she wishes she had a baby daddy who was at work while she was at home taking care of a the kid.

 

[Xarpho's Return]

Amber is a lesbian who's brain made her unattracted from being able to breed, and then ate her way to infertility ensuring she cant breed... but she is so sad she wishes was a mother and things she has so much love etc to give.
Amber sounds like a victim of identiy politics who got brainwashed to being lesbian or trans etc and is now living in regret of not having that trad mother with a husband life. She will never admit it. but she wishes she had a baby daddy who was at work while she was at home taking care of a the kid.

I must admit that when I listened to the Null Amberlynn video, he opened with a video Amber made before laying into her (with the reports from previous girlfriends and later co-hosting with Emspex) I did feel a bit bad for her. And as much as that was a grift for people to sympathize with her and give her money, I'm sure there was a real element of truth out there that led her down the deathfat lesbo life.

 

[Mekahineyho]

Also r8 me l8 and/or jigsaws, but why the fuck is she saying "food" like that? Is this the latest evolution of AccentLynn?

Yes I mentioned this one or 2 times on here cause it was bothering me so bad lol. I think she’s starting to pick up a New York accent from Jade so when she says food she sounds like the Cookie Crisp mascot. I noticed people in the comments are starting to pick up on it too.

 

[Cornfed]

I must admit that when I listened to the Null Amberlynn video, he opened with a video Amber made before laying into her (with the reports from previous girlfriends and later co-hosting with Emspex) I did feel a bit bad for her. And as much as that was a grift for people to sympathize with her and give her money, I'm sure there was a real element of truth out there that led her down the deathfat lesbo life.

Best part of that person stream was Josh's reaction to hearing "deathfat" for the first time.

 

[beansoup]

2023 vs 2019

Stolen from Twitter, she really thinks she's significantly smaller than she was then (bedbound according to her own words) but she looks the same to me.
Her weight has shifted from the back and is going forward and down, her back (that's not an ass) looks just as big, and her face is just as big, it's just drooping down vertically now instead of being a perfect sphere.
She thinks these long mumu type dresses with camouflage her rolls and bumps, but they're not. If there is any difference in weight, it's sure not much and I firmly believe she's house bound if not back on track to being bedbound again.
Either way lolfat

 

[Even more 8008135]

ALR's frog-ass is located here.

Now look at this picture, and tell me again how she can reach her own ass and junk to wipe properly.

 

[Diet Coke 4 Life]

A'ight, sorry, but I will say that either AL has experienced significant downward motion of her blubber, or she actually is a smidge slimmer.

Using the above side-by-side picture, here's what I did to prove this.

First, you gotta realize that the two pictures are different sizes. Use her ear to resize the one in that floral disaster so she's the same overall size. The ear doesn't change dimensions and as it's at about the same angle, it works nicely. (her hairline conveniently lined up when I did this, too, so we've got AL the same distance from the camera now.) I did this by splitting the image into two images, layering them over top of one another, and reducing the floral disaster to 35% opacity.

But that's not overly clear, because it's evident that in one, she's standing with her weight forward (snake dress) and the other she's pushing her backfat shelf-ass back (floral disaster). And opacity makes it hard to see. So let's do this:

My lines weren't perfect because I was using my shitty track pad (too lazy to get up and get the Wacom, plus I need to update GIMP - it's being a jerky bitch on me these days because I've been remiss in doing a software update). But still, now we have redlines to follow.
Let's compare with the snake shit.

So as we can see, while she is standing at a slightly different angle, there are more pixels of space behind her than there are jutting in front of the redline on her other end. This could be due to her flubber crawling down into her layyyyyygs, or it could be do to some actual loss of weight.

Not that it matters, bitch is still a musk oxen of FAT and I would not have sex with her.

 

[beansoup]

I want to see those tree trunk legs, therein lies the secrets.