Amberlynn Reid - 600 pound pathological liar and U-Haul lesbian moving in with her next live-in maid/nurse/girlfriend.

[formerfatcow]

Our fantastic author gorl wrote Eric a birthday message. Can you spot the mistakes?

She's so fucking dumb I honestly can't believe how she functions in everyday life.
Also, notice the sincerity of Becky's message to Eric while ALR's just reeks of ingenuity.

“Since we’ve lived together in the same house with neither of us leaving for work, we’ve grown closer.”

Wow it’s almost like they went from being total strangers to roommates. Funny how that works.

 

[Xenomorph]

It's ok, she works for Google y'all. View attachment 534078

Her bank?? What in the fuck does her bank have to do with it?

 

[CreedenceLeonoreGielgud]

Our fantastic author gorl wrote Eric a birthday message. Can you spot the mistakes?

She's so fucking dumb I honestly can't believe how she functions in everyday life.
Also, notice the sincerity of Becky's message to Eric while ALR's just reeks of ingenuity.

A part of your life, Amber, not 'apart'.

You want to be a part of his life for along time.

 

[Make Believe]

Can you please stop? Astrology is for retahrds.

no

 

[Basketball Jones]

Her bank?? What in the fuck does her bank have to do with it?

Her answer reads like she thought the statement was about her taxes or finances, when it was actually about her lack of employment and looking bad on a resume...

But the fuck knows words are just sounds her mouth makes that sometimes successfully make a human-like sentence.

 

[8008135]

"Do you see how ghetto she gets?" AL is pointing to Dusty because Dusty had the nerve to tell her to stop cackling loudly in the Denny's.

Somehow it's ghetto NOT to want to make a scene.

Later she is still cackling acting like a cunt and Dusty tells her to stop again and says "we are in a restaurant, you are not the only one"

Holy shit ... I'm not used to people in the hamplanet orbit actually making sense. I don't think I give Dusty enough credit.

 

[Trasha Pay That A$$]

It's ok, she works for Google y'all. View attachment 534078

Even if that were the case, she would still have to give a job description and list her skills. Sleeping/sitting in bed most of the day and exploiting your horrorshow body for money doesn't give you too many job options.

However, I thought she was on a tear that she works for herself? You can't do that and work for Google at the same time, Amber.

 

[Twinkie]

Imagine her explaining to an interviewer that her "job for google" was to make weightloss videos

 

[Dutch Courage]

Imagine her explaining to an interviewer that her "job for google" was to make weightloss videos

And then imagine the interviewer checking out the videos and seeing how utterly incompetent she is in all facets of being.

 

[Puta Bruja]

Our fantastic author gorl wrote Eric a birthday message. Can you spot the mistakes?

She's so fucking dumb I honestly can't believe how she functions in everyday life.
Also, notice the sincerity of Becky's message to Eric while ALR's just reeks of ingenuity.

Unnecessary comma right off the bat.
"we have had ar ups and downs.."
Apart instead of a part.

For as short and lame as that little note is she still managed to fuck it up pretty well.
Muh writeen skillz.

 

[EH 110]

Imagine her explaining to an interviewer that her "job for google" was to make weightloss videos

If some 530+ pound fatty waddled into the office saying she makes weight loss videos, the boss might think, "Wow! I wonder how much she used to weigh? 700? 800?" Then, he checks out her videos and sees that she's gained about 150 pounds (and counting) during her "Google career." LOL

Anyway, I do wish she'd stop putting "weight loss" in the titles. It's false advertising.

 

[Whatthefuck]

Our fantastic author gorl wrote Eric a birthday message. Can you spot the mistakes?

She's so fucking dumb I honestly can't believe how she functions in everyday life.
Also, notice the sincerity of Becky's message to Eric while ALR's just reeks of ingenuity.

Absolutely stunning. We're missing apostrophes spelling 'our' as 'ar' and 'your' as 'yar' (is she a fucking pirate?), she doesn't know the difference between 'apart' and 'a part', and I don't see even one comma where it should be appropriately placed. I'll even give her 'wanna', but I don't like it. Simply stunning.

 

[Twinkie]

She didn't spell it 'ar' that's just her handwriting. It looks like she used one of her fat rolls as a writing surface.

 

[Puta Bruja]

She didn't spell it 'ar' that's just her handwriting. It looks like she used one of her fat rolls as a writing surface.

OH yah you're right. I really thought she put ar. Her fatty fingers must have smooshed the u and r together

 

[Basketball Jones]

Our fantastic author gorl wrote Eric a birthday message. Can you spot the mistakes?

She's so fucking dumb I honestly can't believe how she functions in everyday life.
Also, notice the sincerity of Becky's message to Eric while ALR's just reeks of ingenuity.

Hoe. Skank. Muff Cabbage... how endearing...

For real tho, I thought people grew out of these kinds of names for your friends once they graduated high school, but here we are...

 

[FitBitch]

I can't get over the idea of her trying to get some crappy McJob in bumfuck Kentucky with "Google" on her work history.

 

[Long time lurker]

Is she also gonna tell us she is transracial?

I think that's what she's trying to say when she claims to be Portuguese.

There are a couple of times in her askfm that she has stated these claims. The age changes back and forth between 6 and 7 just like her foster care age changes.

For those wondering why she is randomly bringing all of this up, here you go.

View attachment 533894


Because fucking animals or kids is exactly like being fat, or something.

It reads like Amber didn't know what the word pedophile meant.

Her candid reveal of such sensitive and personal material comes across as someone who is trying to shield their own transgressions; like an ex-girlfriend lying to all her friends that her boyfriend was abusive after she got dumped.

Yes. Whenever Amber mentions being abused it sounds hollow, as if it was her way to make people shut up and go away.

Her bank?? What in the fuck does her bank have to do with it?

Do you need to disclose your employment status when you open a bank account?

 

[SweetDee]

Holy shit ... I'm not used to people in the hamplanet orbit actually making sense. I don't think I give Dusty enough credit.

Dustin was a sped, but she blindsided Amber completely when she dumped her. That alone deserves respect. Destiny also stood up for herself quite often, and refused to let AL boss her around. I'm pretty sure ol' Dustin has more going on upstairs than her appearance would otherwise suggest.

 

[Whatthefuck]

I think that's what she's trying to say when she claims to be Portuguese.

It reads like Amber didn't know what the word pedophile meant.

Yes. Whenever Amber mentions being abused it sounds hollow, as if it was her way to make people shut up and go away.

Do you need to disclose your employment status when you open a bank account?

If you have no credit, they may ask for some kind of proof of income. She's a 27 year old woman with no credit save her defaulted student loans. I don't think they require that information in general, but I'm fairly sure your occupation is asked for.

Spoiler

I used to work for a bank and we would ask income questions basically to ascertain if we could upsell products like financial planning and money market accounts, that kind of thing. Of course, that was back before the housing bubble fucked us all so I'm not sure what they do these days.

Dustin was a sped, but she blindsided Amber completely when she dumped her. That alone deserves respect. Destiny also stood up for herself quite often, and refused to let AL boss her around. I'm pretty sure ol' Dustin has more going on upstairs than her appearance would otherwise suggest.

Dusty had no qualms about calling Hambert out. That's really what I liked best about her. She didn't give into the Hambert bullshit. She didn't allow herself to become dependent on AL so she could say what she pleased and, if you recall, she actually had friends and interests that didn't involve being a shut in. She may be the Chadliest Dyke to ever emerge from the shallow KY lesbian dating pool, but she's her own person and there's a hell of a lot to be said for that.

 

[sis no]

I think its funny how Amberlynn took up an entire page of the card with her obnoxious handwriting, leaving Becky (y’know, eric’s actual best friend) to smush her birthday wishes around nessie