Amberlynn Reid - 600 pound pathological liar and U-Haul lesbian moving in with her next live-in maid/nurse/girlfriend.

Are you looking forward to seeing Jade's face on camera?

  • Yes

    Votes: 554 15.7%

  • No

    Votes: 349 9.9%

  • I don't care

    Votes: 2,630 74.4%
  • Total voters
    3,533
Aldora said:
At this point I don't think Amber wants to eat less, she just wants to be thin and still eat everything that she wants to eat.
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Yeah I'm totally aware of that. Honestly I think there isn't any hope left for her. She hasn't accomplished anything in life, has a fucked up family, and hates what she has become, but hey, food!
 
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Dokkaebi said:
Maybe not 200lbs, but she could lose a decent amount of weight pretty quick if she just ate what a normal person eats, a 2000 calorie balanced diet (which I know is too much to ask for). At this point how many calories does she really eat in a day? Almost 8000?
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LOL when Michael Phelps was in top form training for the Olympics, he was eating 8,000 to 10,000 a day. If she works out like he did back in the day, she can go ahead and gorge herself silly.
 
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Aldora said:
I wouldn't be surprised if Optavia not working for Amber actually affects her mental health quite a lot. I think the reason that Amber was bouncing off the wall with excitement over Opatvia is because the "health coach" told Amber that she could lose 200lbs in one year. You can see in the video where she is talking about it, just how excited she is about the idea of losing so much weight and so quickly, she almost loses the ability to speak properly. When she has that moment of realisation that it is all BS, she will be very depressed over it, in her mind she has already lost the weight and the rest of the details are irrelevant.

Telling a food addict who weights 550lbs that they can lose 200lbs in a year is a very powerful lie, there is a reason why Amber isn't listening to reason and I think that this lie is the root cause of it.
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That's a really good observation and I think you're absolutely right. If you compare the overall tone between her January "My Weightloss Plans 2019" video and the Optavia one it's pretty startling.

The January plan was a pretty reasonable approach that involved eating less, moving more and setting small, manageable goals. She was fairly calm and measured in her delivery and her expectations felt realistic.

She's all over the place in the Optavia videos, she's manic af, overconfident, defensive, and it's like she's already lost those 200 elbees in her mind.

It will be interesting to see how she ultimately handles the disappointment.
She may decide to seriously pursue her WLS options, or probably more likely: she will just give up and pack on even more weight.

It's hard to muster up any sympathy for Amber because she's been such a dick to those pointing out the many obvious red flags, but seriously fuck companies like this.
 
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Turd Blossom said:
It's hard to muster up any sympathy for Amber because she's been such a dick to those pointing out the many obvious red flags, but seriously fuck companies like this.
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The company is morally questionable, but even if you pity their other customers, Amber doesn't deserve sympathy. Nobody forced our gorl to blow hundreds of dollars on something 5 seconds of googling reveals is a scam, and then act like a sanctimonious cunt to everybody who knew more than she did about it. Amber is dumb but not rëtarded; she has full agency over her decisions. It in fact speaks to what a raging cunt Amber is that whenever she's elated over something like this, rather than be nice to everybody, like normal people are when they're happy, she's actually nastier. A narrative of Amber being predated upon also helps pre-emptively vindicate a Victimlynn episode where she claims she was bamboozled by a scam - which she was, but because she could have armed herself with information, and instead ordered ten barrels of snake oil and behaved like a smarmy bitch because in her imagination she'd already lost the weight. The first thought in her head when she ordered Optavia Spencer (or whatever the fuck, I'm so confused by her toddler English) was "this is going to show the haydurs". Gorl is as crazy as a shithouse rat.
 
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Obviously we all know that the "coach" is at best an ignorant/fat stay at home mom and at worst a scam artist and that AL is absolutely not going to stick to this bullshit diet, but let's crunch the numbers here for all the other spergs in the room.

A loss of 200 lbs in a year equals roughly 3.85 lbs a week. That's a caloric deficit of 13,475 a week or 1,925 a day. At 560 elbees, AL's daily caloric intake is 3,925 to maintain. That means she needs to eat 2,000 calories a day, and, obviously, less and less as she hypothetically loses weight and her caloric needs go down.

Now, I'm not as fine an AL historian as some of the folks on the farms, but I'm pretty sure the number of times she's tried a 2,000 calorie diet and failed is higher than the number of elbees she's made Becky gain during their relationship.

This time is different, though :shit-eating:
 
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SAVE TWINKIE! said:
Half of those people sucking her ass are probably just hoping to get added so they can creep her food intake
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They’re wasting their time then cause MFP doesn’t tell people exactly what you’ve eaten that day however if you finish a diary entry and you have calories left it’ll say “__completed their diary entry and was below their recommended calorie allowance!”

We all know that’s not gonna happen.
 
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497 said:
she's lucky Optavia won't let people access the forum till after you buy their bars. to check out the nutritionist telling AL it's ok to have another fueling if she gets hungry of course.
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If we learned anything from the dietician saga, it's that Amber's Optavia "Health Coach" is going to have to put in some work to earn that $$$.
She may have thought she was on easy street by suckering in Amber, but I guarantee that by day 2 she was getting bombarded with questions from our gorl trying to game the system, and it's only going to get worse as she gets tired of those bars and realizes she can't maintain this.
- "You said celery's ok for a snack, I can stuff that with Cheese Whiz, right? It's technically a protein!"
- "If I put basil on my potatoes will they count as greens?"
- "I'm having headaches and I feel dizzy. I'd email my doctor but you're my HEALTH coach soooo..."
- "What do you mean I can't have McNuggies?! They're LEAN white meat and they were FREE on Weight Watchers!"
- "Ok, but what if I paired them with a dill pickle? LEAN and GREEN! You know what, fuck it. Just send me another dozen boxes of double chocolate brownie bars."
 
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I see a lot of asspats in the near future, tbh.

Remember, Amber is so huge that even just a tiny bit of restriction, the smallest amount of effort will result in several pounds lost.

Now as I gaze deeper into my crystal ball: Dummies will eat it up and shower her with praise. Of course she'll gain back the weight but that doesn't matter. She still proved us "wrong" about Optavia because she lost sooooooo much weight on it YOLL! She only gained it back because she decided to quit honey boo boo chile
 
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Turd Blossom said:
If we learned anything from the dietician saga, it's that Amber's Optavia "Health Coach" is going to have to put in some work to earn that $$$.
She may have thought she was on easy street by suckering in Amber, but I guarantee that by day 2 she was getting bombarded with questions from our gorl trying to game the system, and it's only going to get worse as she gets tired of those bars and realizes she can't maintain this.
- "You said celery's ok for a snack, I can stuff that with Cheese Whiz, right? It's technically a protein!"
- "If I put basil on my potatoes will they count as greens?"
- "I'm having headaches and I feel dizzy. I'd email my doctor but you're my HEALTH coach soooo..."
- "What do you mean I can't have McNuggies?! They're LEAN white meat and they were FREE on Weight Watchers!"
- "Ok, but what if I paired them with a dill pickle? LEAN and GREEN! You know what, fuck it. Just send me another dozen boxes of double chocolate brownie bars."
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MY PYRAMID SCHEME BLOCKED ME.
 
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As someone who has been on MFP since '09, the replies and friends you make on there always seem like bots. I'm convinced half the users are. That's the only excuse I can see for her getting ass pats.. Unless she's active in forums (can't see that as she mainly uses the app). Don't think has the reasoning skills to see this or even care. Free ass pats.
 
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Because it's boring as shit, here's an amusing .gif of Amber's jiggly jowly face, with credit to a poster I can't recall.

giphy-(4).gif
 
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