Careercow Brandon "Bam" Margera - From Jackass to Lolcow

[Rogowski]

tl;dw:

• tube down his throat
• 5 seizures, 20 minutes long, fifth one so gnarly he couldn't breathe
• bit his tongue and made it gush blood, got so swollen it wouldn't fit back in his mouth
• committed to his shaman 5am hikes, 5 miles up a mountain every fuckin morning
• followed by thirteen 10-hour ceremonies (?)
• quit smoking for 12 days thus far
• "drinking is blasphemous here" (lol, he ain't kickin' that)
• just ordered a hot tub, ice bath, and a sauna
• meeting up with a bunch of skaters for dinner tonight, namedrops a big list
• "Tony Hawk, perhaps *giggle* he hasn't gotten back to me"
• then off to LA to see Alyssa Whitegloves (?)

He also mentioned the Shaman brought him to the hospital when he seized and given that he doesn’t believe in alcohol it’s safe to assume that his seizures were due to alcohol withdrawal.

 

[Fareal]

He also mentioned the Shaman brought him to the hospital when he seized and given that he doesn’t believe in alcohol it’s safe to assume that his seizures were due to alcohol withdrawal.

"Hi, I'm Bam Margera, this is Alcohol Detox without Medical Supervision, and I'm probably gonna fuckin' die."

Sounds like the opening of Jackass 5 is gonna be a real downer

 

[Bubble Ba'ath]

"Hi, I'm Bam Margera, this is Alcohol Detox without Medical Supervision, and I'm probably gonna fuckin' die."

Sounds like the opening of Jackass 5 is gonna be a real downer

Yeah but that would guarantee I would watch it.

 

[Programmer Socks]

This shaman stuff is really funny. Too bad he hasn't checked out Scientology.

It's so Bam, isn't it? He can't just quit booze and take it easy, it has to be 5am 5km hikes with a pretend witchdoctor. How old is Bam now and he can't even stop obeying his elbow without making it someone else's responsibility. Just stop drinking, you moron.

The bit where he says the Shaman will make Bam "look like a Greek God in a month" - that's just Bam's way of making his own health someone else's job, and a way of deflecting blame when it all goes to hell again.

I think it would be better for everyone, including his own son, if Bam dies.

 

[I am Jack's dead arm]

The people I knew that had withdrawals that bad were dead soon after. Bam's body is basically shutting down at this point. He needs to be in a real locked down detox/rehab, not eating granola and hiking with some hippie.

 

[Wine em Dine em 69 em]

I don’t get all of this boo hooing for Bam. He’s never shown himself to even be a decent person, let alone a good one. He’s never experienced any true struggle in his life. Never overcome anything. The only reason we know who he is is because he was an above average skater two decades ago and grew up with parents wealthy and kind enough to drive him everywhere and video tape everything. By the time I finish typing this, some person far better than Bam, and with a fraction of his resources, will probably have died in complete obscurity somewhere in the world.

I genuinely don’t care if Bam gets better. I just hope he doesn’t take anyone else out with him.

Thank you for saying it.
I was going to suggest a very distasteful poll-‘ will you be upset when Bam biffs it’.

 

[AskeDead]

i think at this point we just have to assume bam wants to die. he's been through god knows how many rehabs and interventions, but we're supposed to believe hiking with a shaman is going to do the trick? nah, he's done.
i just hope any kiwis suffering through addiction in this thread or are on the edge of it take bam as a cautionary tale and find the help they need.

 

[Fraiser crane]

It's so Bam, isn't it? He can't just quit booze and take it easy, it has to be 5am 5km hikes with a pretend witchdoctor. How old is Bam now and he can't even stop obeying his elbow without making it someone else's responsibility. Just stop drinking, you moron.

The bit where he says the Shaman will make Bam "look like a Greek God in a month" - that's just Bam's way of making his own health someone else's job, and a way of deflecting blame when it all goes to hell again.

I think it would be better for everyone, including his own son, if Bam dies.

Yeah a Greek god - not exist

 

[CowPox]

Bam has no real personality, he's always been the out of control party animal his entire adult life, the only actual sober personality he organically cultivated was that of a 15 year old skateboard kid, there is nothing underneath all the drugs and booze, nothing to revert back into as a middle aged man.

 

[Cowboy Christ]

I never had nostalgia for Bam, barely knew he was even there in THUG and Jackass, and the more I learn about him I don't pity him,

but damn if I don't understand how some people do and how some people eventually learned to stop tolerating him.

 

[Jack Awful]

i think at this point we just have to assume bam wants to die. he's been through god knows how many rehabs and interventions, but we're supposed to believe hiking with a shaman is going to do the trick? nah, he's done.
i just hope any kiwis suffering through addiction in this thread or are on the edge of it take bam as a cautionary tale and find the help they need.

I think it's less wanting to die and more that he just doesn't give a shit about anything other than filling his addictions and will say and do whatever lets him have booze and drugs. Like the shaman stuff is just a lame attempt to get people to stop nagging him. "I'm seeing a shaman now, so please stop nagging me about drugs and alcohol and trying to get me to go to rehab! Now excuse me, I'm going into the bushes to snort cocai- I mean meditate!"

He most likely still understands death and that giving into his vices will lead to it, but his constant need for substances will always trump any voices in his head telling him to stop.

 

[G.Rapefruit]

Bam has no real personality, he's always been the out of control party animal his entire adult life, the only actual sober personality he organically cultivated was that of a 15 year old skateboard kid, there is nothing underneath all the drugs and booze, nothing to revert back into as a middle aged man.

He wasted his time in rehab doodling and making up his own language and alphabet. Sounds like someone who is trapped as a 14 year old edge lord. It’s kinda sad. I grew up in western PA and in the early 00’s I was taken out to a party at castle bam by a friend from Youngstown Ohio who had skated with and also sold cocaine to bam and some of his friends. The party was pretty cool but I was a kid then and have grown and matured…bam is still the guy from that night. The guy that let us drive his lambo even though everyone was fucked up. The guy that was doing rails of cocaine off hard 7’s asses. He threw money off the balcony at one point and ripped up money later and pissed on it. It’s a great act when you’re young but hes grown now. I honestly think it’s some form of brain damage. Drug and alcohol induced.

 

[Wesley Willis]

tl;dw:

• tube down his throat
• 5 seizures, 20 minutes long, fifth one so gnarly he couldn't breathe
• bit his tongue and made it gush blood, got so swollen it wouldn't fit back in his mouth
• committed to his shaman 5am hikes, 5 miles up a mountain every fuckin morning
• followed by thirteen 10-hour ceremonies (?)
• quit smoking for 12 days thus far
• "drinking is blasphemous here" (lol, he ain't kickin' that)
• just ordered a hot tub, ice bath, and a sauna
• meeting up with a bunch of skaters for dinner tonight, namedrops a big list
• "Tony Hawk, perhaps *giggle* he hasn't gotten back to me"
• then off to LA to see Alyssa Whitegloves (?)

Alissa White-Gluz, the lead singer of metal band Arch Enemy.

 

[I am Jack's dead arm]

Not sure when this Vice show was made about him. It seems like shortly before he went into rehab. He's in rough shape, but still much better than recently. I don't buy that he's been sober for any length of time.

Bam Margera: Jackass, Skating & the Dark Side of Fame | Epicly Later'd

This episode of Epicly Later'd first aired in 2017. Bam Margera, legendary pro skater and star of Jackass, struggles to overcome substance abuse and the loss...

youtu.be

 

[Jack Awful]

Not sure when this Vice show was made about him. It seems like shortly before he went into rehab. He's in rough shape, but still much better than recently. I don't buy that he's been sober for any length of time.

Bam Margera: Jackass, Skating & the Dark Side of Fame | Epicly Later'd

This episode of Epicly Later'd first aired in 2017. Bam Margera, legendary pro skater and star of Jackass, struggles to overcome substance abuse and the loss...

youtu.be

It says 2017

 

[Rogowski]

Yeah Vice has been recently reuploading their Epicly Later’d series for some reason

 

[Fareal]

Yeah Vice has been recently reuploading their Epicly Later’d series for some reason

They want the rubbernecking views before Bam "suddenly and unexpectedly" dies on this post-hospital bender.

Apparently he turned up at Bucky Lasek's 50th. Definitely the guest you'd want at your own big birthday, a half-collapsed Margera.

 

[Jack Awful]

Yeah Vice has been recently reuploading their Epicly Later’d series for some reason

Maybe there's some 5 year exclusivity deal they had with the network and now it's free to upload to YouTube

 

[I am Jack's dead arm]

It says 2017

Thanks, man. That makes it even worse because even back then people were telling Bam to clean up his act. And April really comes off as an enabler, even shutting down Phil when he said he was worried about Bam's drinking.

 

[Rukario]

Thanks, man. That makes it even worse because even back then people were telling Bam to clean up his act. And April really comes off as an enabler, even shutting down Phil when he said he was worried about Bam's drinking.

I actually find it ironic that there was an entire episode of Viva La Bam dedicated to hounding Phil into not eating so much, yet when Phil tried to convince Bam to act more healthy, Bam refused and April shut Phil down. The Pot calling the Kettle Black and all that, albeit with Bam doing pot on the side of his drinking.