Careercow Brandon "Bam" Margera - From Jackass to Lolcow

[Rei is Shit.]

Why does he have a roll cage in his living room?

Hes doesnt want to go out like his best friend Dunn.

 

[Raven Rainbow]

Bam downplaying his pedo uncle in a 2015 Reddit AMA (A)

> Is there any chance we'll ever see the Don Vito footage that was supposedly cut from Jackass 2?

I think that got locked up in a vault and they threw away the key, because of that ridiculous lawsuit in Colorado for touching a boob and ruined his life.

The "ridiculous lawsuit in Colorado" was this one:

On August 18, 2006, Margera was arrested at the Colorado Mills Mall in Lakewood, Colorado, on suspicion of inappropriately touching two 12-year-old girls. He was released after posting bail of $50,000.
The trial started on October 22 in Golden, Colorado. Margera's attorney argued that his client had been playing his "goofy, outrageous and vulgar" television persona for the girls, portraying Margera as a "benign bumbler", and arguing that Margera's signature arm movement may have been mistaken for breast fondling.

Even back then all the replies were calling Bam out lol

It's okay, I'm only acting.

by touching a boob you mean molesting a 12 year old, right?

Wow. "Ridiculous lawsuit." Groping a bunch of young teens as an old man. You are ridiculous, not the lawsuit.

It was a preteens breast you disgusting fatass.

 

[SDK]

Bam needs long term rehab and reconditioning.

Steve-o was in rehab for six months to a year of I remember the interview correctly.

Steve-o was in rehab twice, each for months at a time. The first was a result from the Jackass intervention and the second was voluntary after a stay in a psychiatric ward for depression where he slept all day for weeks. He then spent a year in a sober living house cut-off from the outside world. Steve-o wanted sobriety and had to work hard. He then did Dancing With The Stars.

Bam is what they call a dry drunk. Basically the person is still a piece of shit even when they are sober.

 

[Fornicario]

Perhaps I'm late and gay but what happened to his lambos?

He had a Lambo Arson and he didn't take the chance to go out like Dunn? What a loser.

 

[roblox gay nazi sex club]

what the fuck has he done this time

 

[Slippin Kimmy]

I miss when Bam just painted bananas blue and smoked reefer

 

[BobDayWalker]

Just surprised he hasn't OD'd and died at this point.

 

[New Bromantics]

Eh.
If he’s still out and about innawoods his BPD mania has probably worn off, leaving depression to smash his shit in. If he’s not sobbing to himself against some log he may be trying to hurt himself using whatever he can (presuming he did not snag a kitchen knife in the chimpout).
Bam acking in the middle of nowhere isn’t content nor kosher, so I hope the police haul him so we can at least get some Bam camping tales

I didn't say I wanted Bam to die, I just said I have a gut feeling this freakout is leading up to him suiciding by cop.

 

[roblox gay nazi sex club]

man its mental how some of the jackass lads have gone completely off the rails
have any of them not gone mental at this point

 

[TheTourist]

I didn't say I wanted Bam to die, I just said I have a gut feeling this freakout is leading up to him suiciding by cop.

He's too self absorbed and narcissistic to kill himself, either directly or indirectly. He'll just get himself nice and beat up, by the woods or by the cops, so he can bandy it about as the mighty misdeeds and injustices that have befallen him. He's a egotistical, spoiled whiner first and foremost.

 

[SpergioLeonne]

I didn't say I wanted Bam to die, I just said I have a gut feeling this freakout is leading up to him suiciding by cop.

I don’t see bam having a redemption arc worth a shit, so he might as well, and if that’s how it ends up, a consummate artiste of bam’s caliber should make it a spectacle.

I hope he gets pummeled to death by a junkie with inexplicably large boxing gloves who hits him from behind

 

[Paranoia Machine]

Okay, but guys you missed the part where he looked at the camera, and said "I'm Bam Margera and this is the Full-Life Meltdown" and then proceeded to charge directly into the woods.

It's all part of the stunt. He knows what he's doing. There's always a little screen for it.

 

[TheTourist]

It's all part of the stunt.

unless his stunt ends with him banging his mom I think he's gotta step up his game. It's 2023 after all.

 

[Paranoia Machine]

unless his stunt ends with him banging his mom I think he's gotta step up his game. It's 2023 after all.

Jackass just can't keep up with some of the farms most prolific stuntmen these days. The times have changed.

 

[CowPox]

Was that ever confirmed (that he survived the impact, only to burn to death in the wreckage)?

The reports concerning the speeds at which the car was traveling (between 132 and 140 mph), as well as the pictures of the wreckage, make it seem like he died instantly.

ETA:
View attachment 5086104
View attachment 5086105
I’ve seen some bad accidents, but never one where so little of the body and chassis remained. I can’t imagine he even felt the heat of the explosion, let alone the ensuing conflagration, since the momentum/impact needed to accomplish that level of damage was probably enough on its own. If they found evidence of smoke inhalation, well then that’s something else entirely…

Anyone have an un-redacted copy of the coroner’s/autopsy report? Wondering what shape his remains were in. I doubt they were that recognizable…[insert obligatory Well Dunn joke here].

Wasn't someones daughter in the car with him?

 

[Paranoia Machine]

There's roads less than 1 mile away in every direction.
View attachment 5083409

I immediately conceded to your logic, but belly-laughed at the possibility of Bam somehow managing to get lost and die in a small stretch of forest where if he just turned around and walked his fat ass 5 minutes in any direction, he'd bump into a Walmart or an Arby's parking lot or some shit.

 

[I Hate Giraffes]

Jackass just can't keep up with some of the farms most prolific stuntman these days. The times have changed.

Camera fades in with modern fat Bam in the foreground and his home in the back ground.

"Hey I'm Bam Margera. This is called rape and incest."

Bam then walks from deep in the woods to inside of his mothers house. She's there washing dishes wearing a shirt, jeans and an apron, the camera crew follows him.

"Oh Hey Bam!" His mother exclaims, before she's punched in the face and bent over, face in the sink filled with bubbling water. The water begins to turn red due to blood dripping into it.

Phil Awakens from his fat slumber and charges into the kitchen. "BAM!" He says with a fat diabetic accent. "Wut are you doing?" He yells in anger in confusion before wobbling to attack Bam. Each step he makes shaking the home.

Bam pulls his mothers face up by the back of her head from the water and turns to his right and faces Phil. Immediately Bam kicks Phil in the testicles, forcing Phil onto his back and creating a loud BOOM upon impact leaving him unconscious.

Bam then leans over his mother shoulder, she's shaking and frozen with fear. "B-b-b-b-b-bam" She says with a stutter. "What is this? Why?" She says in a horrid tone.

Bam looks directly at the camera behind him as both his and her pants drop to the ground. "This is Jackass". He says in a monotone voice and begins raping his mother as the Jackass theme song comes on. His mother could be heard in the background still as the theme continues.

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

Phill is not a evil man, he is just weak. He should have introduced Bam to the backhand when he started acting up but I think he would have been a troubled kid even if Phill was more strict with him. If Bam dies I dont think he would let his grandson turn up the same.
At this point the best thing Bam can do for his son is die because he does not have it in him to get better.

I think people under estimate Bam’s bipolar disorder underpinning a lot of his BS. Unfortunately I don’t think his family realized he was bipolar, or took the diagnosis seriously until he was a complete wreck. I’m sure they were chalking most of his behavior up to drugs, which is the other component of this clusterfuck.

I mean Jess was raised in the same household but he’s not a turbo tweaker writing lesbian spicoli and wearing the same unwashed clothes for a month.

Like most mentally ill addicts Bam hates psych drugs or any drug that doesn’t get him high. If gives him a buzz he loves it. Bipolar people really enjoy being manic, meth mimics or elevates the mania. Psych drugs take away the mania which he hates. Between the mania and meth is brain is fully cooked. He will probably have dementia if he survives another five years.

 

[Spicey McHaggis]

Just surprised he hasn't OD'd and died at this point.

From what I've seen his drugs of choice are meth and booze, and people last a surprising amount of time on those. Doubt he'll be living much past his mid 50s though.

 

[No Batty Boys in Jamaica]

We need a poll for how long Bam is going to last on the run.