Chris-Chan: A Comprehensive History

The American Hedgehog said:
IIRC, Chris's prices tended to be either in line with market value or a bit higher.

Also Bob told him it was fine if he didn't want to keep his collections.

"If you don't think you will ever need some of them, or don't want some of them, don't waste them. Try to do something with them that you and your mother think I would do. Recycle them back into the world, for the world to use. After all, remember we are only the custodians for a while, and what is one man's junk is another man's treasure."
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For real. As unfortunate as it is that Chris never appreciated or understood the sentimental value of Bob’s collections, it’d be completely reasonable for him to not really want to keep shit like 40-50 year old records and stamps. Even if he ended up selling them, it’s better than simply throwing them away and knowing that they ended up with someone who would cherish them more than he did is sobering at least. I know a good portion of Bob’s records were melted in the fire though.
 
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The Fool said:
You can't even take solace in Bob's collections going to people who would value them because everyone who bought Chris' shit just wanted to have "a part of christory"
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Eh, I feel like if anyone who follows Chris bought any of Bob's stuff it'd be more out of sympathy for the latter than wanting it for the sole novelty of having been in 14BC at some point. Plus Bob had good taste in jazz.
 
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I like how Chris got into the challenge craze by having him tell others to scream at the top of their lungs. I can't imagine how Chris' neighbor's felt hearing those beastly yells, and am surprised Barb didn't tell Chris to shut up.
 
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Hogar Grupal said:
I like how Chris got into the challenge craze by having him tell others to scream at the top of their lungs. I can't imagine how Chris' neighbor's felt hearing those beastly yells, and am surprised Barb didn't tell Chris to shut up.
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Honestly, given how we've never heard anything from his neighbors, especially after the house fire, I'm pretty convinced nobody lives within a mile radius of Chris and it's all just abandoned houses. It's just him, alone.
 
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The Fool said:
Honestly, given how we've never heard anything from his neighbors, especially after the house fire, I'm pretty convinced nobody lives within a mile radius of Chris and it's all just abandoned houses. It's just him, alone.
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Chris mentioned that after the fire, he, Barbara, and the surviving pets stayed with a neighbor for a while before being given the rental house by StateFarm.
 
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AmazingEagle said:
Chris did mention that after the fire, he, Barbara, and the surviving pets stayed with a neighbor for a while before being given the rental house by StateFarm.
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Considering how him and Barb accused the firefighters of stealing despite risking their lives to save their asses and their home, I can only assume they treated their neighbor the same. It's shocking yet somewhat moving how much kindness people try to show Chris and his mother even though they act like complete assholes to everyone.
 
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Argh My Cigar said:
Considering how him and Barb accused the firefighters of stealing despite risking their lives to save their asses and their home, I can only assume they treated their neighbor the same. It's shocking yet somewhat moving how much kindness people try to show Chris and his mother even though they act like complete assholes to everyone.
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Well, Chris did accuse a young boy of taking photos of the dumpster at 14 Branchland Court and posting the Manchester Leaks onto Kiwi.
 
AmazingEagle said:
Well, Chris did accuse a young boy of taking photos of the dumpster at 14 Branchland Court and posting the Manchester Leaks onto Kiwi.
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I mean, to his slight defense, trolls have rummaged through his trash even before then and a lot of the weening is done by young boys (well, middle schoolers but still). Yeah it’s paranoia but he’s had “field agents” take random photos of him so some of it is justified. Even so, if he didn’t do embarrassing, socially unacceptable shit in public and dress like a clown, trolls wouldn’t have a reason to take pics.
 
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Argh My Cigar said:
I mean, to his slight defense, trolls have rummaged through his trash even before then and a lot of the weening is done by young boys (well, middle schoolers but still). Yeah it’s paranoia but he’s had “field agents” take random photos of him so some of it is justified. Even so, if he didn’t do embarrassing, socially unacceptable shit in public and dress like a clown, trolls wouldn’t have a reason to take pics.
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I feel like another reason why Chris was paranoid of people going through his trash was that they would find out the truth that he was terrible in high school.
 
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AmazingEagle said:
I feel like another reason why Chris was paranoid of people going through his trash was that they would find out the truth that he was terrible in high school.
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It was very obvious he was a poor student when he flat out admitted to regularly sleeping in class in his “A Week With CWC” project. That and the majority of his classes being your standard remedial special ed subjects like “coping skills”. The bar was set pretty low for Chris in high school because of his autism and he still somehow managed to do terribly. It’s pretty pathetic when he believed his autism was a condition that made him smarter than everyone else yet also mysteriously made them not want to be around him. But I can’t blame him 100% for thinking that way— special ed teachers would always feed kids with disorders like ADHD or autism lies about how their condition was a strength rather than a hindrance. Which undermined the whole fucking point of learning how to cope with your special needs, not embrace them.
 
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Thoughts on this one: episode 53.

I felt first of all it showed an interesting preview into the potential homeless saga. Christian's refusal to accept that Trump was president was a great capsule for his unwillingness to acknowledge reality. The man could be neck deep in water in a flooding room, and say 'if it's flooding, then how come I can still breathe?;. When the homeless saga hits, he will do everything in his limited power to refuse adulting, and likely take his tried and tested (however unreliable) tactics of:

1) This is transphobic. Social media will bail me out.
2) This is stressful. I am autistic. Sighhhhh. Someone else will bail me out.
3) Send 100,000 dollars of donations, please. I need money. I'll do the comics, maybe....
4) Curl up in a ball and hope the bailiffs / cops / repo men get bored.

Next I thought that the whole line about not needing to wait for it to be christmas / his birthday to send him gifts never fails to impress me with how selfish he is. Seriously, I can start to understand why he thinks he's God, because like that Twilight Zone episode 'It's a Good Life', his parents never ever told Christian the word 'No'. If they did, it was Bob, and he would run to Barb who would undercut the decision. If it was Barb who said no, it was through traumatic emotional blackmail like threatening to kill herself. I don't kid myself that death is a pleasant thing in anything but the most extreme cases (painful crippling disabilities vs euthenasia), but honestly, Bob dying strikes me as an unusual mercy.

Hearing Sorbet's death, and how Chris so nonchalantly mentions it in passing just infuriates me. Keyboard warrior time... I want to punch him. Animal cruelty's a big sticking point for me. Anyway, internet keyboard warrior time over. Sorry for fagging out.

I loved how he gets his 3D printed figure and it looks crap. The actual skylander avatar christian made wasn't exactly thin, but it wasn't big chungus either. Then we get the genuine product, and due to the limits of 3D moulding, mass production, painting, etc... it looks like exactly like Chris instead of his avater: dumpy as fuck with whopper goggles on. The way Sonichu comments about the glasses/goggles and Amy defends it is Chris' own subconscious manifestation surfacing: he's disappointed, which is why he shows it from a distance, and Sonichu and Rosechu take the foreground.

Love is Love made me lol. Seeing this poor bastard get pinkeye from being within 5 yards of Chris goes to show there's deadlier things than Covid out there.

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When Chris does the ebegging with the sore throat it sounds more convincing than his regular high pitched feminine voice. Then he goes to the park and complains about the smell... which was probably fresh air, something anathema to his nose. He goes through nostalgia, by visiting the park, and seeing it cold, empty, and silent made me wonder if it was an artistic statement beyond Christian's awareness.

Then finally we get to the end of the episode, and the piano geno plays at the end.... holy fuck, this hits hard:

Needs money for bills.... sells his dad's stamps... buys transformers.

To any weens, white knights, or people trying to get close to christian, this is what you're going up against. Chris is, has, and always will be a person who finds empathy an alien concept. To him, life is nothing more than the path of least resistance to obtain more shiny things. He will throw you aside the moment you deprive him of this objective. He is no different than a junkie, albeit it one whose fix is lego and autobots.
 
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SamuellyGenie said:
This is like the fifth time I've seen this commented today. I edited the damn thing and I have no idea what's happening. Sorbet isn't dead yet in the story, and nowhere does Chris talk about a cat dying. Help?
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Sorry Geno, this is a personal story. I first properly knew about chris chan when he ebegged for money for a cat's vet bills, and I think it was Sorbet. I did it because my cat, Tiger, had recently died of cancer. Then from looking at Chris's spending, there was a 95% chance he spent what I, and others donated, on toys and junk. So when I hear Sorbet come up, I often feel sadness for that cat, and fucking fury to the neglect that led to its death. I might have misheard, but I thought from this episode they said that Sorbet was found trapped in the room with the thermo, and I assumed it had been found there dead. Might have been me jumping the gun though, as I had your show on in the background whilst I was trying to speedrun Code Veronica... I'm down to 7 days and 9 hours.
 
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Argh My Cigar said:
It was very obvious he was a poor student when he flat out admitted to regularly sleeping in class in his “A Week With CWC” project. That and the majority of his classes being your standard remedial special ed subjects like “coping skills”. The bar was set pretty low for Chris in high school because of his autism and he still somehow managed to do terribly. It’s pretty pathetic when he believed his autism was a condition that made him smarter than everyone else yet also mysteriously made them not want to be around him. But I can’t blame him 100% for thinking that way— special ed teachers would always feed kids with disorders like ADHD or autism lies about how their condition was a strength rather than a hindrance. Which undermined the whole fucking point of learning how to cope with your special needs, not embrace them.
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Plus, that all came crashing ahead to his graduation. If Chris would've composed himself, Bob would not have felt ashamed of him.
 
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