Prison Letters Chris writes me from Prison (dated September 19th, 2021)

[Least Concern]

If I was a CO and saw a tard jerking it in his cell, I'd just turn 360 degrees and walk away

Nice geometry skills bro

 

[Mariposa Electrique]

Chris's moobs would have prevented him from swimming. No one would want to see those horrible big butthole colored nipples.

Chri's response: "Oh you're all so modest trying to protect a lady's virtue.

 

[Bixby Snyder]

How do prisons handle mass debating anyway? I've read that some cellmates have an arrangement where one will "cover" the other who is facing the wall doing his business in order to keep the guards from seeing. But since Chris is apparently in a single cell unit, I wonder how long it'll be until he's caught. That is if the guards even give much of a fuck.

I think most guards don't care too much... as long as you don't 'spider-man' them.

 

[John Merston]

When you type "Christian Weston Chandler" into NeuralBlender.

Spoiler: NSFL

 

[Shovel Mech Pilot]

When you type "Christian Weston Chandler" into NeuralBlender.

Spoiler: NSFL

View attachment 2685488

Here's NeuralBlender's interpretation of Sonichu.

Spoiler: NSFL

 

[zero-who]

Here's NeuralBlender's interpretation of Sonichu.

Spoiler: NSFL

View attachment 2686267

Looks like a grungy ad for a PS2 game you'd find in a early 2000s gaming magazine, next to a list of cheat codes for GTA III.

 

[Son of Liberty]

Looks like a grungy ad for a PS2 game you'd find in a early 2000s gaming magazine, next to a list of cheat codes for GTA III.

Reminds me of those Action Replay cases with the shitty fanart used to avoid copyright strikes

 

[Branman65]

I think Chris immediately imprints from whatever media he is given to consume. If they gave him an Ayn Rand book he would declare himself John Sonichu Galt. If they gave him the Communist Manifesto he would start spouting shit about workers of the world rise up (and fuck your mothers). I shudder to think what the results would be if they gave him a copy of Mein Kampf or the Koran?

Chris would give up mein kampf after the first chapter out of boredom

 

[RodgerDodger]

Chris would give up mein kampf after the first chapter out of boredom

Not if it was the Classic Comic Book version

 

[Fraiser crane]

Still can't believe nobody has done what Christine asked and photoshopped hair and shit on him to prove he's literally jesus

 

[BigTubboWithLittleChina]

They've already given him a Koran. Chris effectively went 'hmmmm, nah', put it aside, shat himself and did nothing.

 

[Ophelia]

Still can't believe nobody has done what Christine asked and photoshopped hair and shit on him to prove he's literally jesus

There were quite a few when he first made the demand.

 

[Branman65]

But for real communist manifesto is a short breezy read, he could handle it. Mein kampf is a hard book, so he would drop it quick

 

[ANobody]

Here's NeuralBlender's interpretation of Sonichu.

Spoiler: NSFL

View attachment 2686267

Dunno why it gives me big Skullmonkeys PS1 vibes

 

[Birthright]

Him saying he's mailed stuff to his lawyer speaks alot about him having guilt and understanding consequences

 

[Smithfield Ham]

But for real communist manifesto is a short breezy read, he could handle it. Mein kampf is a hard book, so he would drop it quick

Both books are about cranky, deluded old men with delusions of grandeur rambling about their narcissistic power fantasies.

 

[Branman65]

Both books are about cranky, deluded old men with delusions of grandeur rambling about their narcissistic power fantasies.

Mein kampf is pretty realistic because his delusions Came true, even if they were for a mere 12 years before they were stolen. Communism on the other hand hasn’t been politically relevant since 1992

 

[The Whore of Babylon]

Nice geometry skills bro

he was moonwalking

 

[A Grey Cat]

This thread :

 

[Smithfield Ham]

This thread :

In my defense, when I wrote that I didn't think we'd still be talking about it a month later. I thought there'd be 10 more Chris letters