Chris's excuses for being unemployed / pretending to be overworked megathread

[Tikbalang]

They would have to put up signs that say "Do not throw pennies", and "groping hazzard".

Also "Don't scream 'Get a Job" sign

 

[Bardle-B Jones]

The funniest thing to me is that people unfamiliar with Chris’ recent antics will mistaken “my body is in mid-transition” to undergoing sexual reassignment treatment instead of what he actually means: becoming an autistic video game console goddess.

 

[Argh My Cigar]

Won’t Chris’s tugboat be adjusted to meet his new CoL expenses once 14BC gets repo’d? Shit, he might get a schizophrenia diagnosis tacked on to his mental health record which would net him an even loftier sum.

 

[Murgeruni]

Won’t Chris’s tugboat be adjusted to meet his new CoL expenses once 14BC gets repo’d? Shit, he might get a schizophrenia diagnosis tacked on to his mental health record which would net him an even loftier sum.

The actual amount doesn't matter, he'll blow it on toys before rent is due. That and unless he goes to a facility or clinic to get a formal diagnosis, he'd never meet the criteria. If he gets arrested and gets an eval, sure, he'd meet that, but as it stands, it's more likely he'll hop from shitty apartment to shitty apartment getting evicted nonstop.

 

[Mariposa Electrique]

Won’t Chris’s tugboat be adjusted to meet his new CoL expenses once 14BC gets repo’d? Shit, he might get a schizophrenia diagnosis tacked on to his mental health record which would net him an even loftier sum.

No, you have to have a serious disability like being blind, deaf, or crippled. Chris' tugboat wouldn't change.

 

[Hogar Grupal]

Chris shouldn't have to work. He should be in a zoo like environment where he has everything he needs and we can go look at him.

Isn't that already 14 BC?

 

[RustyNail(her)]

Won’t Chris’s tugboat be adjusted to meet his new CoL expenses once 14BC gets repo’d? Shit, he might get a schizophrenia diagnosis tacked on to his mental health record which would net him an even loftier sum.

He only gets increases for COL like maybe 1% a year? If he tells them he can't survive on what they give him they might assign a worker to him that budgets his money or helps him get into section 8/halfway housing. Being crazier isn't going to help anything unless they deem him incompetent then he's definitely going to a sped facility.

Honestly though I don't see Ruckersville giving a shit that some troon can't pay his bills cause he needs video games, they'd probably just let him become homeless. The real crux of it will become if Chris can keep up on the important bills after Barb kicks it. If he know he HAS to pay them then he might.

 

[Chan Fan]

If he had a tard-wrangler (Barb replacement) that could work with him, he might be able to do something simple. The fact that his parents were so old and frail, especially in the tranny years, meant Chris didn't have any structured authority figure.

"No Chris, it's sweeping time, not Pokeyman time. You'll get to talk to your Pokemen very soon"

He would just tell them Magi-chan will sweep the floor for him, or Mewtwo

 

[Argh My Cigar]

No, you have to have a serious disability like being blind, deaf, or crippled. Chris' tugboat wouldn't change.

Chris is at risk of serious physical disability anyway. At his age, plus his lack of exercise and living conditions, it’s only a matter of time before his back gives out. If his heart doesn’t explode before then, that is. Heart attacks are already common for the average adult age 40+ and Chris’s health is quite a bit below what’s typical for that category of men. Combine that with his family medical history and I can’t see Chris living beyond 55.

 

[Hogar Grupal]

He only gets increases for COL like maybe 1% a year? If he tells them he can't survive on what they give him they might assign a worker to him that budgets his money or helps him get into section 8/halfway housing. Being crazier isn't going to help anything unless they deem him incompetent then he's definitely going to a sped facility.

Honestly though I don't see Ruckersville giving a shit that some troon can't pay his bills cause he needs video games, they'd probably just let him become homeless. The real crux of it will become if Chris can keep up on the important bills after Barb kicks it. If he know he HAS to pay them then he might.

If it were Classic Chris, he'd probably blame Rville for a huge conspiracy.
A worker is just what Chris needed all along, cause Barb would fuck all in regards to taking care of a home and an adult son.

 

[Mariposa Electrique]

Chris is at risk of serious physical disability anyway. At his age, plus his lack of exercise and living conditions, it’s only a matter of time before his back gives out. If his heart doesn’t explode before then, that is. Heart attacks are already common for the average adult age 40+ and Chris’s health is quite a bit below what’s typical for that category of men. Combine that with his family medical history and I can’t see Chris living beyond 55.

I agree somewhat, but as long as he's not blind, deaf, or completely cripple, he probably won't get shit.

 

[Argh My Cigar]

I agree somewhat, but as long as he's not blind, deaf, or completely cripple, he probably won't get shit.

Truth be told, I think Chris dying suddenly while he’s still relatively “young” would be a more merciful fate than dying slowly from illness. It’d be less depressing to see, and he would be spared the hardship of spending a prolonged existence deteriorating on the streets.

 

[Mariposa Electrique]

Truth be told, I think Chris dying suddenly while he’s still relatively “young” would be a more merciful fate than dying slowly from illness. It’d be less depressing to see, and he would be spared the hardship of spending a prolonged existence deteriorating on the streets.

I don't think Chris will get that luxury, since he's already aging like a banana peel left in the sun. The only good thing about it is that Chris doesn't understand the concept of dignity.

 

[troon patrol]

I really wish people would just stop sending chris money. There's nothign wrong with paying him for his shitty comic or commissioned art but, giving him money for nothing is what really put him in this state where he feels no shame nor has no reason to change. IIRC both Alec and Kacy pinned him down and made him admit outloud he had no excuse to live like a potato.

 

[Law-Talking Guy]

As I've mentioned before, I've worked with disabled adults at a legal clinic, assisting them in getting their own tugboats. Many of these adults, far more disabled than Chris, held part time jobs. However, there was always a key difference: They had a parent/guardian/handler who was a firm authority figure who could and would direct them. Chris lacks that, and simply does whatever he wants. So can Chris be employed? Yes, there are menial jobs that he could, in theory, physically perform (like recycling organizing, which I've seen several disabled adults do.) However, he is at the point where he mentally refuses to perform any task he doesn't want to. Additionally, he takes no initiative, and would probably just sit around after completing one task, until he was assigned another one. And this is before getting into his delusions about the dimensional merge and expounding about them to anyone who will listen.

 

[KiwiFarmsMod]

Is Chris the worst case of entitlement, or does some other lolcow have that distinction?

Chris is the worst case, but I think it's overshadowed by the fact that he's the least successful aside from Phil in his self-entitlement.

Chris is up there for sure, but I’ve got an example of a cow who is much worse than Chris: Victoria Bella Morte. There is a thread on her here but it’s not active and sucks. If you want to see an ego that would make Chris’s look like the Earth next the Sun, check her out on lolcow farm

Though Chris is extremely lazy, I still think there is a conspiracy to keep him down. The Greene County School board has only gained power and reach since they forced Chris back to Ruckersville. I just know they are behind this

 

[Argh My Cigar]

The only good thing about it is that Chris doesn't understand the concept of dignity.

I mean, you have to envy him in a sense. He's absolutely convinced that he's better off idling his life away in his room surrounded by legos and navy saturated pony plushes than earning an honest living. He acts as if he doesn't have a care in the world. Which will, unfortunately, be all the more satisfying once he finally receives the first true-blue rude awakening of his life.

Or he'll shit himself and do nothing.

 

[Kaiser Wilhelm's Ghost]

I'd be interested to see if Chris's meditations aren't just him spacing out/indulging in fantasy.

I'll admit I'm not an avid Chris follower since the whole troon saga started, but it seems to me that his grip on reality which was always tentative to begin with has gone full blown out there.

Not to the point where he is incapable, though I'd be interested to see if it's just his autism that's caused it, or some form of schizophrenia, but his constant going on about the dimensional merge really speaks to a life of person so unfulfilled that he has had to retreat inside of himself in order to come to a place where he believes he ultimately has control over.

I mean, you have to envy him in a sense. He's absolutely convinced that he's better off idling his life away in his room surrounded by legos and navy saturated pony plushes than earning an honest living. He acts as if he doesn't have a care in the world. Which will, unfortunately, be all the more satisfying once he finally receives the first true-blue rude awakening of his life.

Or he'll shit himself and do nothing.

I think at this point in Chris's life he wouldn't know what to do if he was expected to work. He's led a incredibly insular life, and I think even if he wanted to work he wouldn't know how to go about doing it. Almost all of the systems set up for Chris were inherited from Bob trying to assure his son would have as normal a life as possible. Chris hasn't coped well with moving forward from that point.

 

[ToroidalBoat]

I also don't think Chris could work a job. Like others said, he's physically able to, but he's mentally still a child. Children can't exactly hold down adult jobs well. And of course there's the 'tism, the obese ego, and the years of isolation in 14 BLC.

 

[anti SJW]

The only work Chris has willingly done His entire life is look for a boyfriend free girl.