Cooking with Kat (and DSP) thread

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harbinger said:
The way this guy spends money, I’m surprised he doesn’t pay Gordon Ramsey to bake him a lasagna and ship it to his real, adult house.
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What a complete idiot. Gordon Ramsay is NOT authentic Italian. He was born in the UK. What a nudnik. What would HE know about 100% Italian crushed tomatoes from a can? What would HE know about 3 bags of sugar in the 100% authentic Italian sauce? Cahmahn. He wouldn't know FUCKIN' RAW Italian dishes if they slapped him in the face like some 11 year old girl.
 
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Schmeckel said:
What a complete idiot. Gordon Ramsay is NOT authentic Italian. He was born in the UK. What a nudnik. What would HE know about 100% Italian crushed tomatoes from a can? What would HE know about 3 bags of sugar in the 100% authentic Italian sauce? Cahmahn. He wouldn't know FUCKIN' RAW Italian dishes if they slapped him in the face like some 11 year old girl.
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What about the guy who shat his pants during the februrary harvest? Not everyone likes it.
 
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D$P apparently had an onion bagel with strawberry cream cheese for a bedtime snack on Sunday. The bagel had almost reached it's "expiration date"* and thus, D$P believes that eating the no longer 100% fresh bagel made him feel ill and suffer heartburn. He is only "partially lactose intolerant" and an overweight near 40 year old filling their belly right before going to bed surely had nothing to do with it. The Bagel, being close to it's "expiration date" was the culprit. Take from this what you will as this story had also embedded in it an attempt to spawn a new D$P meme...because that's how memes are generated. Additionally, the household that "didn't have a dime to it's name" and is in desperate need of $1,800 to 'keep on pace with their long standing plans to solve their financial issues' went to have their "hair trimmed" and bought fresh onion bagels as well as flavored cream cheese.
* Bread and baked goods from the deli section of the grocery store will have 'Sell By' dates. They are in no way indicative of the shelf life of the item.
 
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Phil no longer eats fast food.

Phil eats out 3 times on his day off.

We must conclude that Phil gets 3 meals on his day off that aren't fast food.

So Phil gets 6 meals, 3 for himself and 3 for his horse.

6 meals with drinks in Seattle is at minimum $100. Probably closer to $300.

This man is in danger of losing his home of he doesn't get tips.
 
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Sparkletor said:
Phil no longer eats fast food.

Phil eats out 3 times on his day off.

We must conclude that Phil gets 3 meals on his day off that aren't fast food.

So Phil gets 6 meals, 3 for himself and 3 for his horse.

6 meals with drinks in Seattle is at minimum $100. Probably closer to $300.

This man is in danger of losing his home of he doesn't get tips.
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Multiply the number by about two given Pig also eats like twice as much as most people given he made himself like four egg and bacon sandwiches and used to order and eat a whole pizza by himself.
 
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Raven'sChild said:
D$P apparently had an onion bagel with strawberry cream cheese for a bedtime snack on Sunday. The bagel had almost reached it's "expiration date"* and thus, D$P believes that eating the no longer 100% fresh bagel made him feel ill and suffer heartburn. He is only "partially lactose intolerant" and an overweight near 40 year old filling their belly right before going to bed surely had nothing to do with it. The Bagel, being close to it's "expiration date" was the culprit. Take from this what you will as this story had also embedded in it an attempt to spawn a new D$P meme...because that's how memes are generated. Additionally, the household that "didn't have a dime to it's name" and is in desperate need of $1,800 to 'keep on pace with their long standing plans to solve their financial issues' went to have their "hair trimmed" and bought fresh onion bagels as well as flavored cream cheese.
* Bread and baked goods from the deli section of the grocery store will have 'Sell By' dates. They are in no way indicative of the shelf life of the item.
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🤢🤮 Good god! It says a lot about him that he combines a salty/savory herb onion bagel with fruity/sugary sweet creem cheese and just shoves that monstrosity down his gullet, or that fatty considers 500 to 600 calories a "bedtime snack".
This dude has no fucking taste buds. If it costs more munny it tastes gooder to him 🤑
 
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Prince Lotor said:
🤢🤮 Good god! It says a lot about him that he combines a salty/savory herb onion bagel with fruity/sugary sweet creem cheese and just shoves that monstrosity down his gullet, or that fatty considers 500 to 600 calories a "bedtime snack".
This dude has no fucking taste buds. If it costs more munny it tastes gooder to him 🤑
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Ugh, why not a nice chive and herb spread. I wonder if that’s a kat combo or an authentic italian special...
 
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Is it odd that approximately zero meals incorporate Phil's robust Italian sauce? Does he spend a full day burning the sauce and then not eat it?

What did Phil cook last week? Frozen chicken patties and stir fry. If he had used the sauce he would have said he made chicken parmesan or something.

Your sauce is bad and you should feel bad.
 
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Freshtodeath said:
Did phil discover bagels in his 30s? He eats these stupid bed time snacks because he eats dinner at 4pm.
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Umm, wrong.

Gumshoe voice. "Oooh, Phil eats dinner at 4pm like my grandpa" wrong. Phil is from Connecticut. 4pm in Washington is 7pm in Connecticut. Phil obviously eats dinner at 7pm except this Sunday when he will eat dinner an hour later because of the time change.

"Phil, wouldn't that mean you get out of bed at 2pm eastern?" Banned.
 
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Sparkletor said:
Umm, wrong.

Gumshoe voice. "Oooh, Phil eats dinner at 4pm like my grandpa" wrong. Phil is from Connecticut. 4pm in Washington is 7pm in Connecticut. Phil obviously eats dinner at 7pm except this Sunday when he will eat dinner an hour later because of the time change.

"Phil, wouldn't that mean you get out of bed at 2pm eastern?" Banned.
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Eh, if I wanted to hear snorting and honking and wanted to get banned on a shitty site like twitch, I'd ask him why he's still autistically following the same schedule over and over again despite being in a 3 hour different timezone and advocate going to a shrink to see if he is actually autistic.

Either that or ask why he didn't make chicken parm for his tendie week. Literally using the word tendie too.
 
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Freshtodeath said:
Did phil discover bagels in his 30s? He eats these stupid bed time snacks because he eats dinner at 4pm.
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I'm going with bagels being another food introduced to him by the SoulMaid. He never mentioned them before. Additionally, it was not long ago he asked the chat for advice on how to store bagels because the fresh deli section bagels were molding before the two of them could eat ...all 6...of the bagels they bought.
 
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Phil's favorite thing that Kat makes is "Cajun Chicken"

Do you think she buys chicken and then adds premixed seasoning or is the chicken frozen with the cajun spices already on it?
 
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LiquidCancer said:
Phil's favorite thing that Kat makes is "Cajun Chicken"

Do you think she buys chicken and then adds premixed seasoning or is the chicken frozen with the cajun spices already on it?
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Cmon man, you know it's the second one.

Actually, wait, let me put on my Be like Burnell Besnie.....

Kat will buy Cajun flavored chicken, and ALSO add Cajun mix, because dsp can't taste shit anymore.

She then goes to her room.
 
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LiquidCancer said:
Phil's favorite thing that Kat makes is "Cajun Chicken"

Do you think she buys chicken and then adds premixed seasoning or is the chicken frozen with the cajun spices already on it?
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It's some tv dinner that you nuke for like 5 minutes and then you microwave like 2-3 of them because of how gluttonous Pig is.
 
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