Ok, but the most important question is this:
How can we turn this into a shitty analogy about a sandwich shop?
Edited because I typed metaphor when I meant analogy.
Imagine there’s a sandwich shop, and there is a socially inept literal retarded guy working behind the counter for fifteen years. A man walks in and says, “hello good sir, I would like to make a documentary about you and your sandwich shop”
The dude behind the counter says, “yes! As long as you don’t mention my many fuck ups”
The documentarian says, “what do you mean, buddy?”
The guy sighs and laments, “Well I burned all the food, I spent all the money I made on toys and statues, I never upgraded my equipment, when I couldn’t afford my previous building’s lease I bought a new place that’s three times as big , I never cleaned my workstation, I never pay the people who design the menus, I never kept a record of my profits or losses, when people asked for new sandwiches I called them ‘fucking idiots,’ and every once in a while I take this tin cup at the register and shake it at my customer’s faces for tips.”
The documentarian replies, “okay, so what have you done that’s good?”
The guy smugly smiles and proclaims, “I invented the first grilled cheese over fifteen years ago.”
The documentarian says, “but didn’t this guy down the street do it before you?”
The guy becomes incensed and yells, “Yeah? But I don’t toast my grilled cheese. Mine is just white bread and cheese.”
