DC Comics Multimedia General - A crisis of infinite fuck ups

[strumpets exeunt]

I'm kind of embarrassed how much I've been marking over the Captain Atom comments in the chat. As a hardcore Charlton Comics fan, I've developed a depressingly abusive relationship with DC ever since Infinite Crisis. Wholeheartedly agree that it was so satisfying watching Nate body the whole of the Authority in Armageddon.

Plus Ultraman getting his own version of “What’s So Funny About” would be funny, because of how the Authority would react to a crackhead Superman.

This would actually solve a lot of problems, because retards on /co/ keep missing the point of Superman beating the Elite. The point was never "might makes right." It's "might makes outcome." They could have told the exact same story with Darkseid stomping on Manchester Black's face with a very different status quo in the end. Having a straight up villain like Ultraman body the Authority would show that a policy of "biggest stick wins" isn't really feasible in the long run.

 

[Humble Architect]

I'm kind of embarrassed how much I've been marking over the Captain Atom comments in the chat. As a hardcore Charlton Comics fan, I've developed a depressingly abusive relationship with DC ever since Infinite Crisis. Wholeheartedly agree that it was so satisfying watching Nate body the whole of the Authority in Armageddon.

This would actually solve a lot of problems, because retards on /co/ keep missing the point of Superman beating the Elite. The point was never "might makes right." It's "might makes outcome." They could have told the exact same story with Darkseid stomping on Manchester Black's face with a very different status quo in the end. Having a straight up villain like Ultraman body the Authority would show that a policy of "biggest stick wins" isn't really feasible in the long run.

All of Wildstorm, Atom getting the badass KC design and giving the “End of the world” speech is one of the best comic moments ever, Nathaniel finally getting to cut loose and make that universe his bitch was a character peak.

But you get what I’m laying down, with the “Authority should be Crime Syndicate rogues” idea, because it defuses every argument. Ultraman being high on K while suplexing the Authority shows how unsustainable the poison of their ideology is. Because there is always a bigger, meaner dog who will cross the lines you won’t.

It would be the same terrifying wake up call Manchester got, though the speech would probably be less stern big brother and more Ultraman flexing and beating Apollo to a smear (as is tradition for the Authority) while being smug and manic.

 

[Incecticyder]

@Incecticyder, strand them or have Ultraman kill Carrier, or like Captain Atom have crossing the Bleed kill it. Like Earth 3 is an unplanned trip and them ending up there be a mix of accident, karma and the “second chance” from the end of Armageddon that never happened.

I think that could be the script from a show based on Armageddon. However, since 3 teammates are dead, the adaptation might change that.

But I really think they could be something worthwhile again, just not in the same Earth as the League. The Authority replacing the dead heroes of Earth 3 to me at least seems like the best place to fix them.

Plus it lets the Crime Syndicate flex on an enemy outside the League and show why they’re the OG evil Justice League, all the Authority’s tricks wouldn’t work. That “punching below the belt” tactic only works on opponents who aren’t gonna stomp you to death.

They’re the underdog, they’re the losers facing down an enemy who’s taken over the planet and has absolute power.

Exactly. They would be a lighter shade of grey but they would have to stop being edgelords and learn that they are no better than the people they protect. They just have more power.

But that’s just how I’d bring back a niche team that I like, I know they’re not popular, especially with the fags always stealing the spotlight but of the endless fucking “edgy Justice League” variations that aren’t just pure dark comedy like the Crime Syndicate, I think they’re the best. The no-kill rules are gay and writers making a big deal out of them is lame, but the Authority are the biggest reason why Superman and the gang shouldn’t tear apart every guy they fight.

Oh, they are the "Gay Couple" of DC! Marvel has Hulkling and Wiccan and DC has these two. Their only role is to kiss on camera.

As for the no-kill rules, I have shown in this site that such rules work. They just do not write them right. Have them be a deal they made with the police or something. Avoid killing and they will not be prosecuted for vigilantism. Superheroes ARE breaking the laws. Killing means courtrooms and unmasking.

Plus Ultraman getting his own version of “What’s So Funny About” would be funny, because of how the Authority would react to a crackhead Superman.

I would be more interested in seeing them fight a team that are no pushovers or goodie-two-shoes.

Also, what do you think should be the line-up for those teams?

 

[strumpets exeunt]

Oh, they are the "Gay Couple" of DC! Marvel has Hulkling and Wiccan and DC has these two. Their only role is to kiss on camera.

It's kind of funny how their role is to kiss on camera, while the ACTUAL prominent gay couple from DC who get shoved on all the covers (Harley and Ivy) are almost never allowed to touch each other in a sexual manner because that would be too appealing to the male gaze. They didn't even get to so much as kiss in the last Pride comic (yes, I did just scan through it at the cost of my own sanity). But you know what you DO get in that comic? A full page of spread of the new gay black chick Lantern with the Tunnel Snakes hairdo rubbing herself all over a weirdly pudgy Nubia.

Comics!

 

[XYZpdq Jr.]

It's kind of funny how their role is to kiss on camera, while the ACTUAL prominent gay couple from DC who get shoved on all the covers (Harley and Ivy) are almost never allowed to touch each other in a sexual manner because that would be too appealing to the male gaze. They didn't even get to so much as kiss in the last Pride comic (yes, I did just scan through it at the cost of my own sanity). But you know what you DO get in that comic? A full page of spread of the new gay black chick Lantern with the Tunnel Snakes hairdo rubbing herself all over a weirdly pudgy Nubia.

Comics!

that's how they stop bank robberies
the crooks drop their guns to cover their eyes so they don't have to see uggos lezzing out

 

[Incecticyder]

It's kind of funny how their role is to kiss on camera, while the ACTUAL prominent gay couple from DC who get shoved on all the covers (Harley and Ivy) are almost never allowed to touch each other in a sexual manner because that would be too appealing to the male gaze. They didn't even get to so much as kiss in the last Pride comic (yes, I did just scan through it at the cost of my own sanity). But you know what you DO get in that comic? A full page of spread of the new gay black chick Lantern with the Tunnel Snakes hairdo rubbing herself all over a weirdly pudgy Nubia.

Comics!

Yeah but in their defense, Harley and Ivy are villains. As far as heroes go, these two are the poster boys. Also, I mentioned them because kissing is all they can do that is not villainous by DC standards. Also because that is all Wiccan and Hulkling do as well.

 

[Humble Architect]

Well the rules in all media made off jewish policies is that you can sexualize, fetishize and maim men but women are off limits. Best shown in the “The Boys” with the “man in dick scene.”

The new arc I consumed from DC was Warworld 2.0 and Clark spends the whole thing in a John Carter outfit while every woman is covered head to toe.

So it’s not suprising that Apollo and Midnighter get the reductive treatment, I think the Midnighter comic had an arc called “Hard.” Because faghags get off on that shit. I dunno, anything to do with the team getting folded into DC I couldn’t care less. I know Midnighter was being a catty fag with Nightwing because Dick is just the male equivalent of Power Girl now.

Which him being like that ruins the whole appeal of character.

 

[Incecticyder]

Well the rules in all media made off jewish policies is that you can sexualize, fetishize and maim men but women are off limits. Best shown in the “The Boys” with the “man in dick scene.”

The new arc I consumed from DC was Warworld 2.0 and Clark spends the whole thing in a John Carter outfit while every woman is covered head to toe.

So it’s not suprising that Apollo and Midnighter get the reductive treatment, I think the Midnighter comic had an arc called “Hard.” Because faghags get off on that shit. I dunno, anything to do with the team getting folded into DC I couldn’t care less. I know Midnighter was being a catty fag with Nightwing because Dick is just the male equivalent of Power Girl now.

Which him being like that ruins the whole appeal of character.

I can take that. He has hot redheads to console him. A lot of things can be made better with hot redheads. As for the hypocrisy, it is nice to have a quick and easy example to shut the feminazis up. He is always good in my book as long as no disco outfits or mullets are involved.

 

[el bandito loco]

He is always good in my book as long as no disco outfits or mullets are involved.

Heresy. Disco outfits and mullets are a requirement.

 

[Incecticyder]

Heresy. Disco outfits and mullets are a requirement.

When it started, it was fashionable. Nowadays, he would look like Midnighter's and Apollo's third.

 

[Humble Architect]

When it started, it was fashionable. Nowadays, he would look like Midnighter's and Apollo's third.

Well he’d have more in common with Jon in that case. It’s kind of a shame that for the PKJ run, Apollo (as-is tradition) got taken to Mongul’s sex dungeon and did nothing.

Because they retconned Apollo into a Superman fanboy and it would’ve been funny. While Jon is trying and failing to be Earth’s Superman, his dad is in space killing facists and bonding with a different dainty guy with father issues.

Because then Jon could truly relate to Damian, where their dads are closer to characters who are almost the same thing but not blood.

Superman returning to Earth with Apollo in the Superfamily instead of the two little shits would’ve been perfect, because Midnighter, through Nightwing is an extended member of the Batfamily.

I think that would’ve warranted a Lois facepalm.

 

[Incecticyder]

Well he’d have more in common with Jon in that case. It’s kind of a shame that for the PKJ run, Apollo (as-is tradition) got taken to Mongul’s sex dungeon and did nothing.

Because they retconned Apollo into a Superman fanboy and it would’ve been funny. While Jon is trying and failing to be Earth’s Superman, his dad is in space killing facists and bonding with a different dainty guy with father issues.

Because then Jon could truly relate to Damian, where their dads are closer to characters who are almost the same thing but not blood.

Superman returning to Earth with Apollo in the Superfamily instead of the two little shits would’ve been funny, because Midnighter, through Nightwing is an extended member of the Batfamily.

I think that would’ve warranted a Lois facepalm.

You can have them work if you change a whole lot of their backstory and tone. Have them wrestle with the fact that they are not the paragons a hero is supposed to be but still be willing to improve as people. I CAN see Apollo as a fan. I would rather see him find his heart instead of getting killed. Same goes for Midnighter. I think there have to be changes to the tone of such a series. Anti-heroes learning to be paragons could go hard.

 

[Newcomer 42]

The Authority were a try-hard, edgy take on the JL. Why keep them around instead of killing them, as they tend to do with everyone else?

 

[Humble Architect]

The Authority were a try-hard, edgy take on the JL. Why keep them around instead of killing them, as they tend to do with everyone else?

They only kept the gay guys and the slag, the rest are practically forgotten.

 

[el bandito loco]

When it started, it was fashionable. Nowadays, he would look like Midnighter's and Apollo's third.

In order to pull off looks like that, you either have to be the most masculine motherfucker ever or a flaming faggot.

In all seriousness I dont mind Dick being the male equivalent to PG but I also basically have my own personal take on Grayson that doesnt really exist that I project on to anything I read with him in it.

He's the full potential Bruce Wayne. What I mean by that, is when Bruce was a little boy, he lost his parents and swore an oath and began his mission and essentially mentally became Batman as grade schooler. Dick, is the Cinderella/Rags to Riches thing, where he as a little boy is adopted by the richest man on earth and instantly given the outlet of batman and the training that Bruce spent his life looking for. The Bruce Wayne shit Bruce does as a formality, Dick actually gets to enjoy it.

The dates with super models and ski trips and shit, Bruce is keeping up appearances. Dick is actually screwing these socialite broads and enjoying the skiing. While at the same time he's a superhero. He's got his cop career and whatever else he wants to do, but he's Batman but perfectly well adjusted. It's part of why he is beyond the meta reason of the original sidekick, the actual heir to the throne of the DC universe.

He's Batman's first (and favorite) son, his uncle is Superman, he enjoys life, but will whoop some ass, hes cautious and a thinker but won't fuck over his own friends due to his insecurities like his pop. By the time he's like 17 he was leading his own team of heroes largely without any supervision, etc.

If anyone's going to be the male power girl, might as well be basically the perfect dude as far as dc heroes go. and it isn't new he gets more pussy than anyone else in the DC universe, might as well own it. Although portraying him as dumb about it like they usually do I think is lame. Id assume he'd know this about himself. The only time big Dick Grayson ever got shot down was that dyke Batwoman. and iirc she seemed to consider it despite being a lesbian.

I think Nightwing out of everybody should pretty much always be an ultimate chad character every time he shows up. He just would be. He got handed the luckiest break possible as a kid and chose to do the right stuff with it, and was in the unique position to grow up seeing the flaws and failures of the prior generation and learn from them before he was even a man. Let alone had access to training by basically every superhero character he'd ever want to be trained from just by asking from the time he's like 12.

 

[Incecticyder]

In order to pull off looks like that, you either have to be the most masculine motherfucker ever or a flaming faggot.

I know but Dick is a pretty boy. Manly man is not really an option for him.

In all seriousness I dont mind Dick being the male equivalent to PG but I also basically have my own personal take on Grayson that doesnt really exist that I project on to anything I read with him in it.

We all do. Just keep a good head on your shoulders about what happened and what is in your head.

He's the full potential Bruce Wayne. What I mean by that, is when Bruce was a little boy, he lost his parents and swore an oath and began his mission and essentially mentally became Batman as grade schooler. Dick, is the Cinderella/Rags to Riches thing, where he as a little boy is adopted by the richest man on earth and instantly given the outlet of batman and the training that Bruce spent his life looking for. The Bruce Wayne shit Bruce does as a formality, Dick actually gets to enjoy it.

Full potential is not the term I would use. Different specs is better. Less drive to be a crime fighter but more well-adjusted. He will not haunt the night like Bruce but he will not shun the day like him either. Bruce has a near autistic determination to be who he is. Dick could one day remove the cowl and never put it on again. Bruce IS Batman. His retirement would hit him harder as he would lose his real self.

The dates with super models and ski trips and shit, Bruce is keeping up appearances. Dick is actually screwing these socialite broads and enjoying the skiing. While at the same time he's a superhero. He's got his cop career and whatever else he wants to do, but he's Batman but perfectly well adjusted. It's part of why he is beyond the meta reason of the original sidekick, the actual heir to the throne of the DC universe.

I doubt that Bruce does not enjoy the models or the ski trips. He has many needs and those serve as outlets for them. Bruce just does not allow himself to think like a normal man. His playboy persona is an act. I believe going to vacation with fellow superheroes might be better for him. To be having fun without having to pretend to be someone he is not must be better. I just do not think Barbara or Selina are right for him. Barbara is like a little sister while Selina has a lot of growing up to do.

He's Batman's first (and favorite) son, his uncle is Superman, he enjoys life, but will whoop some ass, hes cautious and a thinker but won't fuck over his own friends due to his insecurities like his pop. By the time he's like 17 he was leading his own team of heroes largely without any supervision, etc.

Dick is the best kind of sidekick. He grew up. Really, all the Bat Family did. Bruce was a good father. I think that while Dick is the first and favored, none of the rest are lacking in love from Bruce. Any of them could take on the mantle and things would be fine.

If anyone's going to be the male power girl, might as well be basically the perfect dude as far as dc heroes go. and it isn't new he gets more pussy than anyone else in the DC universe, might as well own it. Although portraying him as dumb about it like they usually do I think is lame. Id assume he'd know this about himself. The only time big Dick Grayson ever got shot down was that dyke Batwoman. and iirc she seemed to consider it despite being a lesbian.

He probably knows enough to realize he is one of the hottest men in the verse but he is not self-absorbed enough to want to try his luck even when he could get away with it. As for Batwoman, she is his aunt. She probably considered it but she decided against it as it would complicate things with Bruce.

I think Nightwing out of everybody should pretty much always be an ultimate chad character every time he shows up. He just would be. He got handed the luckiest break possible as a kid and chose to do the right stuff with it, and was in the unique position to grow up seeing the flaws and failures of the prior generation and learn from them before he was even a man. Let alone had access to training by basically every superhero character he'd ever want to be trained from just by asking from the time he's like 12.

While I doubt that he would not like his parent to have never died, he got the next best thing.

 

[Polyboros2]

at least you could tell those guys did open up a couple green lantern comics.

I'm not so sure of that, Ryan Reynolds had to correct stuff on set like the Lantern's Oath.

He's the full potential Bruce Wayne.

I like Dick when he takes on the cowl(post Knightfall and before/during Batman Inc), but even that(at least Knightfall) acknowledge that Dick had grown into his own thing. Dick has the moves, but not the mind. Tim Drake is the full potential replacement of Bruce, even Ra's Al Ghul acknowledged that.

 

[el bandito loco]

I think you guys are taking what I'm saying too literally. my point is not he should replace Bruce but that he's essentially a better version of Bruce (Well, more rounded) by virtue of learning from his mistakes, not having the same hang-ups etc.

you know the idea that you raise your children to be better than you are, is exemplified in Nightwing. Because he was raised by batman and by extention the justice league or whatever he's got the advantage of being taught all of the strengths and learning early from the weaknesses. He's basically Bruce if Bruce could turn off the obsessivness enough to have a real life outside of it also, which im sure is how Bruce wanted him to grow up. He's his own guy sure, but that's exactly what makes him "better"

I think Nightwing definitely could put the mask up one day, but I also think he never would, because he enjoys it but also because he believes in what he does. I think once he gets old or whatever Dick Grayson would be one of the first guys to roll up to someone whether magic or tech or whatever and be like hey hook me up with something to make me 30 again I don't want to be sitting on my ass.

 

[Humble Architect]

I'm not so sure of that, Ryan Reynolds had to correct stuff on set like the Lantern's Oath.


I like Dick when he takes on the cowl(post Knightfall and before/during Batman Inc), but even that(at least Knightfall) acknowledge that Dick had grown into his own thing. Dick has the moves, but not the mind. Tim Drake is the full potential replacement of Bruce, even Ra's Al Ghul acknowledged that.

Tim pre-ruining and before the little shit was the next Batman in the making. Just like Conner was the next Superman in the making.

Dick was always his own man and honestly is more of Bruce’s little brother than “son” due to Batman’s arrested development and his own state of mind in those early years of the cowl. In that regard, he really is the culmination of Batman and Superman’s ideologies. Very funny that his best girlfriend was a flying brick alien.

Jason was a little Rorschach in the making before Bruce but never lost the scrappy touch and despite him being a “failed” Robin, was arguably the closest in soul to Bruce. Also he lacked a counterpart in the other side of the family.

Tim got the brains and that’s what makes a Batman because the rest will follow. Helps also that on the other side of the family, he had a consistent friendship with Conner. Who likewise didn’t have all the “moves” of the predecessor but was a little version of that character, acknowledged by a foe whose primary colour is green. As has been discussed, even DC acknowledged it and the New 52 Batman and Superman were meant to be these two before they got cold feet.

Mind, body and soul, that’s why these three are the best and only costumed Batfamily members I always 100% agree with. The rest suck. The dyke is a poser, Barbara was better as a cripple, all the niggers suck, Catwoman is an insufferable whore who Bruce should’ve thrown in prison and Damian is a little grotesque only good when Jon joined the universe and subsequently became useless when Jon was ruined.

The core three Robins however? Great, best sidekick progression in comics, reveal a lot of interesting stuff about Bruce and his eras. Like Dick growing up in a more limited environment superhero-wise and logically having more exposure to the “originals” and being the sidekick closest to being one of them (true Trinity), leading him to be the logical leader of the “gen two” heroes. Or Tim being brough in post-abject disaster and having a colder Batman as a mentor being perfect for making a “new one.”

 

[Polyboros2]

As has been discussed, even DC acknowledged it and the New 52 Batman and Superman were meant to be these two before they got cold feet.

For a while DC had a really great run of letting other character pass on titles. I like the GL run leading up to Blackest Night, but I also no recognized bringing back Hal and Barry ruined that. I actually like the idea of Conner and Tim being the new main Superman and Batman... out side of the mess that was the New 52. I still can't believe how close Action and Detective Comics were to issue 1000 when they pulled the plug on continuity.

I've been reading older DC comics for the first time, arbitrarily using Zero Hour(mostly cause I read Knightfall and it happens near the end) as my starting point, and using a website that has monthly releases from the company to follow issues as they were released starting in 1994. It's obvious they were toying with the idea of replacing the Trinity with Death of Superman, Knightfall, and then Artemis Wonder Woman. Knightfall is obviously structured as to never be permanent, I'm not sure about Death of Superman, and will see with Wonder Woman. At the same time they de-age Atom, while randomly aging up some of the JSA.

This era of DC is honestly so much my jam. Even the bad shit like Extreme Justice and Fate I am still enjoying. The only real stinkers are stuff like Xenobrood.