Defendant: Ethan Oliver Ralph - Ethan Ralph's Documented Legal Troubles & Other Court Docs

[Lidl Drip]

That's ralph again

No, even before Ralph ran her twitter she could barely write a coherent sentence. She really takes after her dad in that regard.. and the sister too from the DMs we have seen. The whole Morris family is illiterate.

 

[HackerX]

Who did it better, Ralph or Lucas?
View attachment 4784010

"Mr. Ralph, it shows here evidence of Xanax abuse and rapid mental/physical deterioration. What role did Mr. Vickers have here?"

 

[Mr E. Grifter]

I've never though of Ralph as being particularly stupid. Yeah he's no genius but he also isn't an 80 IQ dribbling moron. The years of booze and pills dulled him and made him not put any fucking effort in, sure, but this latest offering of his is just plain retarded. The man has given himself legitimate brain damage. This is like he's trying to win an amorphous semi-formal internet argument rather than actually making an effort to comply to the rules of procedure in a court that could end his life as he knows it.

Ralph's a bit of an everyman in the IQ department, in my opinion, probably would be sat between 90-110 if he was sober and living in a normal situation.

His problem has always been his other faults, and the fact he has managed to find a way to exist his entire life without having to work on them. His rage, impulsivity, laziness and narcissistic tendencies lead him into stupid decisions.

It's why on one level he knows he should shut his mouth, but he just opens it and gets himself into more shit regardless. The scary part for Ralph is, most people become less impulsive with age - specifically, most criminals age out of acting like criminals in their late 20s. If it continues after that, it's probably never going away - at least, says my friend who was a prison psychologist for a good 5 years.

It would be sad if it wasn't for the fact he's such an unrepentant piece of human garbage.

 

[Elmo]

the most common one is to apply and get a job offer from a company in Mexico.

Not so fast there, aylawg. The Ralphamale already has the best job in the sektur of constantly dabbing on yew fuggen spergs that cheat on your spouses and abort your babies, ain't that right, ANDY PIRES?

 

[reptile baht spaniard rid]

No, even before Ralph ran her twitter she could barely write a coherent sentence. She really takes after her dad in that regard.. and the sister too from the DMs we have seen. The whole Morris family is illiterate.

how the hell can this be in the year of our lord Tim Apple and Sundar Google? Every single gorram computer and phone and device in the world underlines words it doesn't recognize (brave on tor on an obscure new zealand bird watching forum underlined TWO already, it doesn't like Zealand being uncapitalized).

so ACTUAL typos/misspellings indicate a complete lack of even being willing to go back and click on anything. it's one thing if it's clear the idiot tried but got the wrong suggested word but wow

to be fair to the three caballeros en mejico i've seen actual professional high-ranking business people send typo'd emails but holy shit

Ralph's a bit of an everyman in the IQ department, in my opinion, probably would be sat between 90-110 if he was sober and living in a normal situation.

this is what's so sad/funny about it - he wasn't actually literally retarded (though he may be now with all the drugs and shit) so he had NO excuse

an actual low-IQ downie would never be able to soar to the heights or drop to the depths of the ralphafail

 

[not william stenchever]

How the hell did he not at least have Pantsu spell check this shit?

If a normal person wouldn't trust Meigh to proofread their shit imagine how Ralph would take it.

"THAT GAHT DAMNED WHORE THAT CALLS HERSELF MY WIFE SABATOGED MY BRILLIANT LEGAL STRATEGIES"

 

[AncientPhosphur]

I think in Ralph’s thoroughly pickled brain by filing this motion he thinks that he’s correcting the public record that his criminal sex charges were really just a copyright dispute. And quite frankly he need to make it a public record by filing that Faith has a loose pussy and in fact his dick is like 8 inches it’s just in the video he’s not even fully hard and it’s a weird angle.

 

[FamicomGorby]

Ralph once again channeling the spirit of Chris Chan and assumes that anyone he talks to knows everything that he's done. How the fuck does he expect an old ass judge to know what the fuck he's talkin about?

Who did it better, Ralph or Lucas?
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So now Ralph is just admitting under oath that he's bitchmade and fled the country to avoid someone calling him fat/mailing him corn.

 

[Elmo]

Ralph once again channeling the spirit of Chris Chan and assumes that anyone he talks to knows everything that he's done. How the fuck does he expect an old ass judge to know what the fuck he's talkin about?

It's a well known fact that all family court judges are big fans of the Killstream.

 

[reptile baht spaniard rid]

It's a well known fact that all family court judges are big fans of the Killstream.

i dunno this filing seems about the fastest way to turn a normal boring family court judge into an a-log you ever did see

 

[Foltest]

I first thought that the document was fake and gay.... then I read more of it and realised it is the real deal.
I guess that nobody is there anymore to tell him that this was a terrible idea to do?

 

[Capt. Jean Luc Ritard]

I first thought that the document was fake and gay.... then I read more of it and realised it is the real deal.
I guess that nobody is there anymore to tell him that this was a terrible idea to do?

would he listen if they were?

 

[Yandex Captcha Solver]

Kiwibros, we took another life

 

[reptile baht spaniard rid]

would he listen if they were?

let'see

• the horse - ain't nobody gonna listen to a bish
• rozy - apparently can't talk yet, but can still a-log
• null - ahahahahahahahahahaha no

I mean MAYBE if Jim said something, but not even then

Reminder: if you don't have people in your life that you would stop what you were doing if they raised objections, you are 1000% on a highway to major fuckups

 

[TherapyMan]

The whole filing reads worse than the joke arguments / transcripts made only pages earlier. That's how you know it's real.

 

[BrieLarsonFan2004]

two dayyysss...

 

[Spudnik]

View attachment 4784590
Kiwibros, we took another life

"Every man has two deaths, when he is buried in the ground, and when he is banned from kiwifarms"
-BYUU

 

[LaurenLauren]

Does he not realise that it doesn't matter how many times the Vickers has said his name? 5000, really? I have a hard time believing it's even 500.

What's the act of insinuation into a business? Even the word "insert" doesn't make sense because Vicky isn't making a dime from those streams with his idiotic guests on.

VICKERS DEFENSE FORCE IN FULL EFFECT

 

[Estate]

Since there's a non-zero chance this thread and posts might get read in a US court case, I think I need to put my best foot forward.

Ahem... TINK! TINK! TINK!

Hey judge, what say you, wana tickle my nuts for a bit?

 

[Alabaster Disaster]

We can blame mind-numbing TV for imparting the myth that somehow counter-suing somehow negates what you are being sued for.

And we can also thank said TV!

Honestly it looks like he got his legal training from this scene: