EBT Payment Shutdown Thread

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Some Badger said:
Recent riots have demonstrated that most Asians are on the defensive side of a citywide chimpout
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It's ironic. Asians vote democrat but privately want policies against blacks and mystery meat browns. Never heard an asian complain if their kid went to the white school, but the gates of hell will open if their kid is going to the ghetto school.

I think Asians just have a mental defect to avoid behaving outside of the perceived interests of the collective. Propaganda tells them diversity is good so they support it even if they disagree with it. Well, supporting it only so long as they don't personally have to engage with the diversity. I'm sure we can trace this all back to the last time a chinese emperor ordered a few million people executed for some imagined slight.
 
Well, the Republicans got their cloture vote, and they'll be reopening the government tomorrow by voting in the original spending bill from 40 days ago. Womp womp. No E..B..T...Party...tooo-night...
 
Dumbledore's Onlyfans said:
Well, the Republicans got their cloture vote, and they'll be reopening the government tomorrow by voting in the original spending bill from 40 days ago. Womp womp. No E..B..T...Party...tooo-night...
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Couldn't they will strike the bill down again? I wonder if it really over.

myhairisonfire said:
Exaggerate and embelish, but dont flat out lie. You should be borderline bragging about what you do
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Turns out I am far worse with trying to write / edit a resume than I thought.
The technical diplomas are part of the Sys Admin Associates degree.
 

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He doesn't know. (BS)
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The14thPrime said:
Couldn't they will strike the bill down again? I wonder if it really over.


Turns out I am far worse with trying to write / edit a resume than I thought.
The technical diplomas are part of the Sys Admin Associates degree.
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The cloture required 60 votes, but passing the bill only takes 51. Republicans are the Senate Majority right now, plus Vance gets a vote in case of a tie. So no, pretty much done.

It remains to be seen what the RINOs in the Senate bargained away to get 8 or so Dems to cross the aisle. Also, Rand Paul voted against the funding bill every time, including this one. Republicans had to scare up an extra vote because of him.
 
The14thPrime said:
Couldn't they will strike the bill down again? I wonder if it really over.


Turns out I am far worse with trying to write / edit a resume than I thought.
The technical diplomas are part of the Sys Admin Associates degree.
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Your changes are marginally better but...
  • "Associates degree"
    • Specify that you hold that degree! I dont see that anywhere on the resume, only the certs
  • "Achieved and exceeded results solo with minimal directive"
    • "Solo" is not a professional term. What results? You apparently refurbish hardware to sell on ebay? Your actual role still isnt clear
  • "Cage Nut installation"
    • Bro really thinks snapping cage nuts into a hole is worth mentioning. You over corrected with the extracurriculars.
You tried to make this better, but you're still missing the mark. Unfortunately, I think you're just retarded. Please enjoy the entitlements my tax dollars pay for. You clearly need all the help you can get.
 
myhairisonfire said:
You tried to make this better, but you're still missing the mark. Unfortunately, I think you're just retarded. Please enjoy the entitlements my tax dollars pay for. You clearly need all the help you can get.
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I think an electrical or plumbing certification would be the way to go. I don't know what this IT career he's describing even is or is trying to be. And that's fine! Honestly good for him for posting the resume at all and attempting to make improvements. But let's get serious now bro you can't be a non-contributing zero for another 2 years, that's hell. Become monomaniacaly obsessed with learning a valuable skill, something people are eager to pay you for, something that you wouldn't struggle to describe on a resume, and then go do that skill.
 
Red Saltire said:
I think an electrical or plumbing certification would be the way to go. I don't know what this IT career he's describing even is or is trying to be. And that's fine! Honestly good for him for posting the resume at all and attempting to make improvements. But let's get serious now bro you can't be a non-contributing zero for another 2 years, that's hell. Become monomaniacaly obsessed with learning a valuable skill, something people are eager to pay you for, something that you wouldn't struggle to describe on a resume, and then go do that skill.
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Technical things are simply easier than social things for me.

An IT Systems Administrator position is installing, maintaing, upgrading physical servers and digital software and services. An adaptable position that can be more on the hardware or sofware side of a network.

I will be able to at least finish the degree.

Asperger's diagnoses likely explains it.

Next option is going for an entrepreneur degree / cert solely for the info on some specific info about writing articles of organization, if the class teaches that.

Electrical engineering seems like fun and a software developer is another great option, but having all my skills in one basket would not be a great idea.
Any apprenticeship is risky atm since people were told to go into trades and the same thing that happened with tech will likely happen there as well.

I want to be able to get off EBT and help contribute to society
 
The14thPrime said:
Couldn't they will strike the bill down again? I wonder if it really over.


Turns out I am far worse with trying to write / edit a resume than I thought.
The technical diplomas are part of the Sys Admin Associates degree.
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Honestly not to sound too hard on you, this is ugly, unappealing and does not give me any information I really care about in a fast and easily digested manner. If this came across my desk it would go straight into the bin, you have no chance some HR thot is going to hurt their eyes trying to read through it. Here is a modified (to remove anything identifying) version of the last one I used around 8 years ago before I branched out on my own, landed a l3/consultant role with it quite easily. The first page should be the info that will grab the HR thots eyes (skills, qualifications, general experience and a corny blurb about yourself as pertains to the industry), then the following pages are your specific role experience with the main blurb being about your achievements and how they were of benefit to the employer (this is the shit I will read through once the resume gets past HR) but limit to the last ~3 roles (not so relevant for yourself) then any additional previous positions should be chucked in a short form list with the company, role and duration you were with them. If you have references, offer them at the end (e.g. references available on request) but do not just slap them onto the end of the resume. It's a good way to gauge if they are overly interested if you get a call and when they ask for references, you know you are making it onto a shorter list.

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From your resume, I wouldn't even consider you for a L1 support role, it lacks clear communication and is cluttered down with useless information.
This is not a comment on your skill or ability, just on the observation from the resume and the impression one gets from it.

I have no idea why this is in the EBT thread or why I am replying but I hope you or some of the other jobless kiwis can use this info in some meaningful way.
Where do I send my bill for consultation?
 
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The14thPrime said:
The IT technician work experience is only recent.
Never have gotten any job through applying.
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You need to embellish you experiences like @myhairisonfire said

I'll add that you should add strong verbs and results. e.g. Received and refurbished laptops could instead be put as Refurbished 50+ laptops per month, exceeding expected KPI's by 10%

@For The Lulz is also correct, your shit is ugly! I will say though, you should avoid templates with too much/complex formatting and graphical stuff, all that would do is create visual clutter and confuse the ATS.

Here is a template i found that might work for ya.
 

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For The Lulz said:
The first page should be the info that will grab the HR thots eyes
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Having been the HR thot for a short period of time (more like low man on the Administrative totem pole who got stuck with the unwanted task, but that's not important right now) I can add some more tips on how to make a resume stand out in a good way, rather than a bad way. All of For the Lulz's tips are excellent, so there's just a couple more things.

Make sure that you have an email address that's some version of your name instead of something retarded. PrincessPeach6969 or HotToddy1996 goes STRAIGHT onto the "nope" pile, trust me. Check your "SensibleEmail26" account several times a day, at least at 8 am and 2pm at a minimum. If it takes you more than 24 hours to respond to an inquiry, your stock value as a potential employee will drop considerably. Checking your email is an important job skill in the business world.

Find out the industry standard pay for the job you're applying for and the area you're living in, and keep your wage requirements on a scale of low to mid. Don't ask for top dollar right out of the gate, because if they wanted to pay top dollar, they would have hired a headhunter and contacted you instead of the other way around. Don't ask for the money you want or need, ask for the money that's reasonable for the job you are applying for. Nothing will get you laughed right into the "rejected" pile faster than unreasonable salary requests. Nothing looks worse than asking a dollar more an hour than the HR thot is making unless you have some AMAZING skills and experience (you don't). Unfortunately, a lot of ex-military people tend to overestimate on the pay. The company I worked for loved to hire ex-military but hated to pay them the money they thought they were worth).

If you're mailing your resume, buy a decent quality paper in a muted, off-white color and spring for the matching envelopes. Don't use regular printer paper, and for all that is holy, do NOT use brights. Make sure the paper is SPOTLESS before and after printing. I've gotten resumes with coffee stains, smudges, and even a mustard smear on them; don't let this be you. Our company used an online application and, as a second round, had select applicants mail in a resume as a sort of shit test, to make sure our chosen applicants could format a document and use a post office.

If you get a phone or in-person interview, be sure to write down the interviewer's name. Within 24 hours of the interview, mail a business-quality Thank You note to that person. The card should be very simple, just a half-sized card with the words "Thank You" on the front. Write a short note inside thanking the person for their time in interviewing you, and expressing your desire to work for the company and hear from them soon. Sure, it's sucking up and may make you feel greasy, but you'd be surprised at how often this works, particularly on true HR thots.

If you don't hear a thing back, for GOD'S SAKE, don't call back every day and harass some poor receptionist or secretary about the job. The chances that you, as a job seeker, will be put through to someone who actually has hiring authority is exceedingly low. Don't call more than once a week. Whoever answers the phones will probably be told when to tell people "Sorry, the position has been filled". They probably WON'T be told who got the job, and certainly won't be told why you didn't get it if you aren't the winning candidate. We had one applicant who kept appearing at the reception desk in person, harassing our receptionist almost every day about a job that she knew nothing about, until I finally had to tell him to never come back or we'd have him trespassed. I then found his resume (he'd made through Round 2, but Round 3 hadn't started yet) and moved him to the "rejected" pile for being an impatient sperglord. Don't let this be you.

Keep in mind, it's the Application Sifter's job to find reasons, ANY reasons, to eliminate applicants and get the final list down from hundreds of applicants to a set few (my number was 6). So, you do want to stand out a little, but not in a flamboyant or disruptive way. For the Lulz's advice is top-notch; the best way to do this is massage your skills. Make them more active tense ("Ran back-ups for 3 departments and 50 computers nightly") rather than declarative or passive ("Ran computer back-ups"). This will give you a little edge, but in a GOOD way.

Also keep your interests and hobbies to a minimum; don't put more than three things. I had a hiring manager eliminate an applicant for being a fan of the wrong sports team, so don't put shit like that in your resume. Try to make your interests sound a little less nerdy and more sociable; instead of saying "I play Magic the Gathering with my gay friends from high school every weekend", try "I enjoy competing in board game tournaments" and let them wonder whether you mean Dungeons and Dragons or chess. Try to make at least one of your interests somewhat athletic, such as going to the gym or playing tennis. This is a non-offensive interest that makes it seem like you might be healthy and call in sick less often, and maybe, so as to not make a liar out of yourself, take up going to the gym or playing tennis? It can't hurt you right now, you've got plenty of time on your hands until you get a job.

Good luck.
 
It was nice while it lasted. Buying groceries without being compacted between endless hordes of spics and chinks.
 
Dumbledore's Onlyfans said:
Having been the HR thot for a short period of time (more like low man on the Administrative totem pole who got stuck with the unwanted task, but that's not important right now) I can add some more tips on how to make a resume stand out in a good way, rather than a bad way.
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I wonder if it is worth putting all this stuff into a singular 'Kiwi Job Agency' type thread? This doesn't really fit here and will get lost as this thread dies now the niggers have all been granted their corn syrup cola gibs. It seems that it is sorely needed info for some who've not had the experience / exposure to know these things operate on the inside and anything that gets a farmer a job over a jeet or wetback would more than likely be a positive in my books.

I'm just spitballing though
 
For The Lulz said:
I wonder if it is worth putting all this stuff into a singular 'Kiwi Job Agency' type thread? This doesn't really fit here and will get lost as this thread dies now the niggers have all been granted their corn syrup cola gibs. It seems that it is sorely needed info for some who've not had the experience / exposure to know these things operate on the inside and anything that gets a farmer a job over a jeet or wetback would more than likely be a positive in my books.

I'm just spitballing though
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It's a good idea. Happenings isn't the right forum for it for sure. Maybe self-sufficiency? I could help with it tomorrow. I wonder how many other people with hiring experience would be able to contribute. We've got to have a few people with experience as employers around here.
 
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