- Joined
- Apr 22, 2015
Let me just spoil random bullshit while I have to kill time and the more I think about this abortion the more that needs to be highlighted and I'm going to put it in spoiler text and not because I give any fucks if anyone wants to see this. I'm putting this in spoilers to highlight just how fucking terrible this is and you can brace yourselves for the terrible cringe that is this movie.
It follows the continuity of both cuts of Justice League. It has the black chick love interest from the Snyder Cut and the whole father in prison sub-plot from the Whedon abortion. I honestly thought this was kind of clever. Only kind of.
The Flash is written like in the Whedon abortion and is "quirky funny" but you want to smash his fucking face in. Even if, somehow, you just never looked at the news or social media and somehow was not made aware that this man is an insane rapist pedophile, his character is incredibly unlikable and obnoxious.
The Flash is Batfleck's errand boy. So they're already ripping off the Iron Man/Spider-Man relationship from the MCU and that largely worked because the actors had chemistry and there's no chemistry between these two. I also can't tell if they even got Affleck in the suit because it very easily could have been CGI. Affleck has one scene without the suit and Wonder Woman appears once. Batfleck's voice is also different this time.
The CGI is HORRIBLE. People look like PS2 characters without any exaggeration.
The action is very over-produced and it's trying to be very OTT but it's all CGI so it's just not impressive.
He does put a baby in a microwave but the shot that got meme'd was reversed for the lols. Why he puts a baby in a microwave is not explained until almost 90 minutes into the film.
The Flash has a little monitor on his wrist like a fuel gauge. Because he needs to eat to do his thing and the gauge is there to remind people of that. Does this go anywhere that he needs to eat? No. They try to do a subversion gag where he saves falling babies and he eats junk food but the joke falls flat.
The faggots save the day, he reminisces about his dead mom and it's done very poorly. The Flashpoint Paradox DC Animated movie did it a million times better. And I assume the comic the animated movie was based on also did it better. In the animated movie, he's late coming back from school, finds a broken window, and discovers his dead mom. We never see the mother's body in the animated movie too and it's much better -which is ironic because the animated movie is a borderline R-rated movie and has a scene where Wonder Woman murders children but I digress. It also plays into the character in a logical and concise way because if he was a little bit faster then he could have been there on time and possibly save the mother. You get it? It makes sense. None of that shit happens here and it hints that maybe the father killed her and all that is addressed in the last 10 minutes.
He goes back in time, stops his mother's murder, but then bumps into his double (which is not in the animated movie and there's an Evil Speedstar that was fucking with him and it made way more sense) and he still has his powers (unlike the animated movie). I'm sure nerds know the name of the Evil Speedstar. I don't care. So he grabs his double, moves him to the science lab so the double can get his powers but for a guy who can stop time he is surprised when lightning strikes at the time he predicted; the lightning courses through him and removes his powers (and a tooth for no reason) and gives the double speed powers. Plot convenience. The original Flash grabs his tooth and superglues it back into his mouth which is not how it works and that pays off in a stupid gag at the end.
The 2nd Flash goes through the motions learning his powers. We get a scene where we see the pedo faggot's ass which I'm sure he got off on.
We get the training bullshit and an explanation why he he can't just immediately fix this (once again, handled better in the animated movie where an Evil Speedstar who is not the Flash is fucking with him and the Flash can't use time travel powers). We discover that the Justice League from both cuts no longer exists but Batman still exists. We got Zoomer college students during bullshit and it's supposed to be funny. There's no explanation as to what happened to Aquaman, Cyborg, and Wonder Woman.
The two fags go to Gotham City and just wander inside Bruce's dilapidated mansion. Michael Gough is not deep faked thank god. There's a lot of memberberry shots from the 89 movie but nothing from Returns. They even bring out the laughing box from the end of 89 where Joker fell to his death. The mansion is also different on the outside compared to 89 and Returns but the interior is mostly the same.
They have a very obvious body double for Keaton who is an old man with a beard and you can't see his face as he fights the faggots. Then Keaton explains multi-verse BS. We're given no explanation why the Keaton Batman retired because fuck you.
The Keaton Batman say's "fuck it" and helps the fags to find Superman. Conveniently, the Bat Computer is hooked up to NASA and they figure out where Superman is. They go to Russia (because of course, Russians are evil now) to save Superman. A LOT of CGI Keaton in the suit. I would say Keaton is in the suit without CGI for maybe 5 minutes.
They finally explain why the Flash can't physically move people while using his power or people will puke their guts out or some shit. They find instead Supergirl, the actress is fine in the role, they free her as the two fags bumble around and the 2nd Flash is shot in the leg but his injury heals-off camera later.
Supergirl saves the day. She learns how to use her powers. Zod from Man of Steel (including the chick that was with him) declares war now because Supergirl was a prisoner and I don't know how that situation worked and it presents more questions. If Batman and Superman are different in this universe but Zod is the same person from Man of Steel? Why did the Kryptonians keep Supergirl in a black site on Earth where they could have very easily killed her or keep her in their infinitely more secure black site or cell or whatever?
They replicate the science experiment so the OG Flash gets his powers back.
The Kryptonions never take off their gear in this movie unlike Man of Steel and that was a plot hole in MOS too.
The faggots, Supergirl and Keaton decide to save the day and fight Zod. It's a CGI eyesore.
They play "fun" music and have an action montage but then Keaton goes Jihadi in the Batwing and crashes it into Zod's ship and it did nothing. He fights some random goon and dies without even killing the goon. Supergirl dies and is stabbed right in the fucking chest.
The faggots freak out and decide to rewind time and fix the past. Keaton still fucking dies and we get a montage of SUPERGIRL REPEATEDLY DYING AND GETTING STABBED RIGHT IN THE FUCKING CHEST.
The 2nd Flash realizes that he has force lightning which was never established before or in Justice League or anything else and that includes the god damn cartoons (I like Justice League Unlimited fuck you he never had force lightning).
The fags use force lightning to kill the goon who killed Batman but not Zod.
The original Flash realizes that their deaths are inevitable and tries to stop the 2nd one from going back in time. The 2nd one keeps going back in time but keeps getting stabbed by bullshit. The 2nd fag has a piece of shrapnel in his arm and kills Zod's bitch with it like it was a Predator gauntlet.
The 2nd one keep going back in time and fucks up the multiverse and here is where we see the grotesque deep fakes of Christopher Reeve and George Reeves. There's probably others I missed. We see Nicolas Cage Superman fight a spider entirely via CGI and he say's nothing.
An evil Flash (not the yellow evil Speedstar from the animated movie) appears and the two fags use force lightning to kill him.
The 2nd fag dies.
They never saved this universe and stopped Zod. The Earth is presumably fucked.
Keaton Batman is still dead.
Supergirl is still dead making the introduction of this character completely pointless.
The original fag returns to his timeline but still alters it so his father can be made free.
Oops, even doing that still altered the timeline and we get George Clooney Batman as the fag's tooth that he superglued falls out of his mouth. Har har fuck you nigger.
Also, also, also! ALL of this bullshit happened because he went back in time to alter the past, right? He also did this in both cuts of Justice League but yet no multi-verse bullshit happened then.
The end.
A sequel or follow up or the character is never going to happen and I hope the Illuminati sacrifices this nigger to Moloch.
The Flash is written like in the Whedon abortion and is "quirky funny" but you want to smash his fucking face in. Even if, somehow, you just never looked at the news or social media and somehow was not made aware that this man is an insane rapist pedophile, his character is incredibly unlikable and obnoxious.
The Flash is Batfleck's errand boy. So they're already ripping off the Iron Man/Spider-Man relationship from the MCU and that largely worked because the actors had chemistry and there's no chemistry between these two. I also can't tell if they even got Affleck in the suit because it very easily could have been CGI. Affleck has one scene without the suit and Wonder Woman appears once. Batfleck's voice is also different this time.
The CGI is HORRIBLE. People look like PS2 characters without any exaggeration.
The action is very over-produced and it's trying to be very OTT but it's all CGI so it's just not impressive.
He does put a baby in a microwave but the shot that got meme'd was reversed for the lols. Why he puts a baby in a microwave is not explained until almost 90 minutes into the film.
The Flash has a little monitor on his wrist like a fuel gauge. Because he needs to eat to do his thing and the gauge is there to remind people of that. Does this go anywhere that he needs to eat? No. They try to do a subversion gag where he saves falling babies and he eats junk food but the joke falls flat.
The faggots save the day, he reminisces about his dead mom and it's done very poorly. The Flashpoint Paradox DC Animated movie did it a million times better. And I assume the comic the animated movie was based on also did it better. In the animated movie, he's late coming back from school, finds a broken window, and discovers his dead mom. We never see the mother's body in the animated movie too and it's much better -which is ironic because the animated movie is a borderline R-rated movie and has a scene where Wonder Woman murders children but I digress. It also plays into the character in a logical and concise way because if he was a little bit faster then he could have been there on time and possibly save the mother. You get it? It makes sense. None of that shit happens here and it hints that maybe the father killed her and all that is addressed in the last 10 minutes.
He goes back in time, stops his mother's murder, but then bumps into his double (which is not in the animated movie and there's an Evil Speedstar that was fucking with him and it made way more sense) and he still has his powers (unlike the animated movie). I'm sure nerds know the name of the Evil Speedstar. I don't care. So he grabs his double, moves him to the science lab so the double can get his powers but for a guy who can stop time he is surprised when lightning strikes at the time he predicted; the lightning courses through him and removes his powers (and a tooth for no reason) and gives the double speed powers. Plot convenience. The original Flash grabs his tooth and superglues it back into his mouth which is not how it works and that pays off in a stupid gag at the end.
The 2nd Flash goes through the motions learning his powers. We get a scene where we see the pedo faggot's ass which I'm sure he got off on.
We get the training bullshit and an explanation why he he can't just immediately fix this (once again, handled better in the animated movie where an Evil Speedstar who is not the Flash is fucking with him and the Flash can't use time travel powers). We discover that the Justice League from both cuts no longer exists but Batman still exists. We got Zoomer college students during bullshit and it's supposed to be funny. There's no explanation as to what happened to Aquaman, Cyborg, and Wonder Woman.
The two fags go to Gotham City and just wander inside Bruce's dilapidated mansion. Michael Gough is not deep faked thank god. There's a lot of memberberry shots from the 89 movie but nothing from Returns. They even bring out the laughing box from the end of 89 where Joker fell to his death. The mansion is also different on the outside compared to 89 and Returns but the interior is mostly the same.
They have a very obvious body double for Keaton who is an old man with a beard and you can't see his face as he fights the faggots. Then Keaton explains multi-verse BS. We're given no explanation why the Keaton Batman retired because fuck you.
The Keaton Batman say's "fuck it" and helps the fags to find Superman. Conveniently, the Bat Computer is hooked up to NASA and they figure out where Superman is. They go to Russia (because of course, Russians are evil now) to save Superman. A LOT of CGI Keaton in the suit. I would say Keaton is in the suit without CGI for maybe 5 minutes.
They finally explain why the Flash can't physically move people while using his power or people will puke their guts out or some shit. They find instead Supergirl, the actress is fine in the role, they free her as the two fags bumble around and the 2nd Flash is shot in the leg but his injury heals-off camera later.
Supergirl saves the day. She learns how to use her powers. Zod from Man of Steel (including the chick that was with him) declares war now because Supergirl was a prisoner and I don't know how that situation worked and it presents more questions. If Batman and Superman are different in this universe but Zod is the same person from Man of Steel? Why did the Kryptonians keep Supergirl in a black site on Earth where they could have very easily killed her or keep her in their infinitely more secure black site or cell or whatever?
They replicate the science experiment so the OG Flash gets his powers back.
The Kryptonions never take off their gear in this movie unlike Man of Steel and that was a plot hole in MOS too.
The faggots, Supergirl and Keaton decide to save the day and fight Zod. It's a CGI eyesore.
They play "fun" music and have an action montage but then Keaton goes Jihadi in the Batwing and crashes it into Zod's ship and it did nothing. He fights some random goon and dies without even killing the goon. Supergirl dies and is stabbed right in the fucking chest.
The faggots freak out and decide to rewind time and fix the past. Keaton still fucking dies and we get a montage of SUPERGIRL REPEATEDLY DYING AND GETTING STABBED RIGHT IN THE FUCKING CHEST.
The 2nd Flash realizes that he has force lightning which was never established before or in Justice League or anything else and that includes the god damn cartoons (I like Justice League Unlimited fuck you he never had force lightning).
The fags use force lightning to kill the goon who killed Batman but not Zod.
The original Flash realizes that their deaths are inevitable and tries to stop the 2nd one from going back in time. The 2nd one keeps going back in time but keeps getting stabbed by bullshit. The 2nd fag has a piece of shrapnel in his arm and kills Zod's bitch with it like it was a Predator gauntlet.
The 2nd one keep going back in time and fucks up the multiverse and here is where we see the grotesque deep fakes of Christopher Reeve and George Reeves. There's probably others I missed. We see Nicolas Cage Superman fight a spider entirely via CGI and he say's nothing.
An evil Flash (not the yellow evil Speedstar from the animated movie) appears and the two fags use force lightning to kill him.
The 2nd fag dies.
They never saved this universe and stopped Zod. The Earth is presumably fucked.
Keaton Batman is still dead.
Supergirl is still dead making the introduction of this character completely pointless.
The original fag returns to his timeline but still alters it so his father can be made free.
Oops, even doing that still altered the timeline and we get George Clooney Batman as the fag's tooth that he superglued falls out of his mouth. Har har fuck you nigger.
Also, also, also! ALL of this bullshit happened because he went back in time to alter the past, right? He also did this in both cuts of Justice League but yet no multi-verse bullshit happened then.
The end.
A sequel or follow up or the character is never going to happen and I hope the Illuminati sacrifices this nigger to Moloch.
