Final Fantasy XIV - Kiwi Free Company

[ChromaQuack]

all and all i love Hades but why the fuck did he send us to cyberpunk troon island

Worst tourism agency ever if you ask me, first he sends us to the not-india dungeons which ends up with us having to deal with the absolute shitshow of post-EW, and when we figure that "well maybe the city of gold he mentions sounds interesting" we get Yawntrail.

Far as I'm concerned it was revenge for turning him into a donut.

 

[00R-Gundam]

 

[Dopey Cunt]

Anyone else find it painfully hilarious how Sphene is introduced as the "Queen of Reason" yet nothing she represents or does has any reasoning behind it whatsoever? No, the writer is too retarded to have done that on purpose.

Time for another round of why Sphere is the worst part of this expansion imo.

1. She gives absolute military authority to a complete psychopath and doesn't have the foresight to install some kind of failsafe in the event that things go south for her "partnership"
2. It does end up going south and she sits there and acts surprised that the murderous psychopath with daddy issues turns on her.
3. She tries to reason with the murderous psychopath by using his familial ties despite him having murdered his only blood related relative just hours ago.
4. She spends hundreds of years just twiddling her digital thumbs instead of trying to find a more sustainable system for her society.
5. She's supposed to be programmed to preserve her people but instead takes the route that just dooms them in the end anyway.
6. She can't distinguish between the figurative sentiment of someone living on and the literal one.
7. She scorns anyone's attempts to help her find a better way and just dismisses it all as it being "fate" despite having several hundred years to do something about it and choosing to do nothing about it.
8. She does not bother to get the opinion of the very people she's willing to genocide the universe for, making the choices for them and disregarding their personal feelings and thoughts about what she's doing.
9. Her actions and decisions directly led to Endless Otis dying. A knight who gave everything for her living counterpart and she doesn't even bother to remember him until the end.
10. She's given a literal magical key that reacts to "fervent desire" and instead of using it to find a better way, instead uses it to double down on her doomed genocide plan.

She's also just a rip off of the professor from Pokemon Scarlet and Violet. In fact I'm convinced the writer of this garbage just played Violet, finished the game and then decided to write the plot for Dawntrail overnight.

 

[King Of Braves]

They're only called the King of Resolve and Queen of Reason because of the parallel to Galool Ja Ja's heads. That's literally it.

 

[Emet-Selch]

i forgot to fucking mention but does anyone else think the ending thematic is fucking ridiculous? the one that plays while we're building the train? i was physically cringing it was insane. it sounds like a song that would play in my little pony.

 

[Dopey Cunt]

Also I want to know what the Alexandrians think about their Queen going off to genocide the universe for them. Are they okay being party to that? Why won't anyone tell them what she was trying to do? What she wanted to do?

Clearly if she had spoken to them, she'd realize that most people are in fact not okay with having their society be built on a mountain of innocent corpses. Even some of the Endless who are arguably to sole reason why she wants to kill everyone wouldn't like being forced to stick around at the cost of so much life.

 

[Rich Evans Ayypologist]

i forgot to fucking mention but does anyone else think the ending thematic is fucking ridiculous?

I saw that point (and the earlier one about the cooking """"contest"""") echoed in this guy's lengthy review:

I still haven't even gotten to the actual coronation, so by having watched this, I've been spoiled on a lot of the goodies to come.

And I'm hype for that fucking song. According to him, there's microphone peaks in the vocals? I really hope that's true because that's fucking amazing. It's fucking perfect.

 

[Shieldman]

i forgot to fucking mention but does anyone else think the ending thematic is fucking ridiculous? the one that plays while we're building the train? i was physically cringing it was insane. it sounds like a song that would play in my little pony.

The song when building the train was just this but x10 more cringe. I was in complete disbelief.

Also I want to know what the Alexandrians think about their Queen going off to genocide the universe for them. Are they okay being party to that? Why won't anyone tell them what she was trying to do? What she wanted to do?
Clearly if she had spoken to them, she'd realize that most people are in fact not okay with having their society be built on a mountain of innocent corpses. Even some of the Endless who are arguably to sole reason why she wants to kill everyone wouldn't like being forced to stick around at the cost of so much life.

There's this very "get your cake and eat it too" when talking about Alexandrians. They are simultaneously living beings that we must care for and help and also lifeless copies it's ok to genocide.

 

[Ravana]

The song is very Lion Kong

 

[Sunflower Samurai]

They could've had an interesting dynamic where the Solution 9 citizens who abstain from sentient souls instead do monster souls to stay alive and that makes them more and more monstrous, but as a whole they dropped the ball on the entire concept

 

[Emet-Selch]

I saw that point (and the earlier one about the cooking """"contest"""") echoed in this guy's lengthy review:

I still haven't even gotten to the actual coronation, so by having watched this, I've been spoiled on a lot of the goodies to come.

And I'm hype for that fucking song. According to him, there's microphone peaks in the vocals? I really hope that's true because that's fucking amazing. It's fucking perfect.

i'm very excited to go watch this lol. thank you.

i was curious and went to go look at "sena" bryer's youtube channel and L M A O

i know this is 7 years old, but holy fuck this is an official VA for the main character of Dawntrail. my jaw is in my lap.

 

[Well Intentioned]

i'm very excited to go watch this lol. thank you.

i was curious and went to go look at "sena" bryer's youtube channel and L M A O

i know this is 7 years old, but holy fuck this is an official VA for the main character of Dawntrail. my jaw is in my lap.

Holy shit that's horrrrrrrible.

 

[Black Willow Lurker]

i know this is 7 years old, but holy fuck this is an official VA for the main character of Dawntrail. my jaw is in my lap.

And this creature still sounds as bad as it did 7 years ago. Worse, actually. Not only did it not improve, but the "SPEEEEEEN!!!!1111" is somehow worse that the entire content of that video. Unreal.

the vocals

Not sure about the peaks, but the poor woman sounds like she's really struggling to hit the notes there. Could be the mix, but it's pretty sad.

 

[RIPRhongoBongo]

I have a newfound respect for White Mage mains. I knew that grind to 50 was rough, but HOLY FUCK does it feel bad

 

[ChromaQuack]

The only lesson, moral or whatever you want to call it I can take from this expansion is the following:

TOTAL
THEATER
KID
DEATH.

 

[Alligator Alcatraz]

ok im a bit drunk but hear me out

Spoiler: lv96+ dawntrail msq spoilers

Everkeep has completely overthrown the natural cycle of reincarnation for people of that Etheirys shard. The regulator system is immensely resource-intensive of souls and aether.

The people of Alexandria live hedonistic lives using regulators which utilize the souls of their departed fellows to sustain their existences. Regulator-extracted memories of the departed are transfered onto servers, "the cloud" (Living Memory's server terminals). An individual's memories enter a lottery system before manifesting as an Endless in Living Memory. Creating and sustaining Endless requires vast amounts of Aether. Additionally, Alexandrians use the souls of murdered animals to enhance combat prowess. Excess souls are kept in storage containers in Everkeep until future use.

As more and more souls are frivolously consumed and stored by Alexandrians, the Aetherial Sea loses naturally blanked souls to give to infants born in that shard. The shard is also in need of Aether due to the Lightning-aspected environment and Endless. This could either lead to miscarriages, stillbirths, and newborn Alexandrians born without souls--living corpses.

To circumvent this issue, infants must be non-consentually forced into the regulator system in order to acquire their own soul from the Everkeep. Alexandrian parents who do not partake in the regulator system are forced to gamble for natural acquisition of souls from the Aetherial Sea. This also includes wildlife of that shard. Not using a regulator means giving birth multiple times to living corpses until you drink the Kool Aid.

In Heritage Found, it is stated that Alexandeians don't have graveyards, which means corpses are turned back into raw aether for material production, be remanufactured into food pellets, sustain Endless, etc.

What i'm saying is that you should enjoy your dead baby-sourced grape pellets force-fed to you by Sphene and Wuk Lamat, goyim.

 

[Rich Evans Ayypologist]

I've also been drinking to try to get through this. And if not for the fact that I've been recording the cutscenes, so that I can spend hours upon hours in editing shitting on this later, I don't think I'd have ever made it through this.

This is the most worthless, awful storytelling I have ever experienced in any form of media, ever. There's bad storytelling that winds up being entertaining - Neil Breen films. There's bad storytelling that winds up being forgettable - Shadowrun Returns. There's bad storytelling that can't overshadow the fun that the rest of the product is - Redline.

Everything about this is unenjoyable and actively enraging. The literal only thing in this entire experience that I've enjoyed has been that I think Ketenramm is Blackguard Big Boggart from Elden Ring. GJJ was the only US voice actor I liked because he sounded somewhat believably bombastic, and he's supposed to be croaking and dying... and his delivery sounds the same as all of the other lines he's given in the game. This isn't a series of minor fuckups - this is a sum total, top-to-bottom damning exposé of a total lack of quality control.

I genuinely cannot recall going through anything else and being just fucking annoyed, the entire time, without end and without relent. Literally every line of dialogue is somehow about wuk lamat - how is that even possible?

 

[Dopey Cunt]

I just did the raids.
Story is cool. Mechs are neat. Fights are fun. Music is bussin'.

The horse bitch can fuck off and die though. Am I supposed to care for her because her soul is dying or something?
She tries to murder me, the person who killed her crazy king and the one responsible for putting the beast soul system in place to begin with to save her own hide from a situation she put herself in. She was unnecessarily rude and lashing out at her sister for pointing out the obvious "murdering people to save yourself is wrong", did nothing to alleviate her situation except sit in hiding the whole time for who knows how fucking long and thinks that she can step up to me?

Nah, fuck off. Just die. Your soul problem isn't my problem and should be no one else's except yours.

 

[Übertroon]

I think whoever designed NPCs this time around fucked up.
Way too many Hrothgars in garish pink or yellow.
A lot of anime protagonist hairstyles on ordinary citizens.
People with old man or woman voices with faces of young people.
They have faces for old humans, so I've no idea why every man has to look like that.
It just seems like the design for Solution 9 NPCs somehow managed to spread to all of Tural

 

[std::string]

I have a newfound respect for White Mage mains. I knew that grind to 50 was rough, but HOLY FUCK does it feel bad

WHM being billed as the newbie friendly healer is a cruel joke. I assume most players pick it up and go "wow healing is complete ass in this game" and never touch a healer again. You also do like no damage until you get Glare so soloing sucks.

If they moved Bene to 15 and Holy to 30 it'd be a lot better.