Orbiter "Flutter" / "Egg" / "Cabbage Patch" / "Meryl" / "Food Lion lady" - Modern Christory's biggest mystery

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Cats said:
I remember Food Lion. My extremely racist grandmother used to say, "That's where all of the colored people shop".
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Food Lion is all over the place where I live. Their stores are clean and well run and their produce is fresher than what you will find at Wal-Mart.
The name may be strange but believe it or not it is a good place to shop.
 
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BubbaRobot887 said:
Food Lion is all over the place where I live. Their stores are clean and well run and their produce is fresher than what you will find at Wal-Mart.
The name may be strange but believe it or not it is a good place to shop.
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So in other words it's far too good of a place for Chris.
 
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FinnSven said:
Chris is forever 14.
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Phalanges Mycologist said:
Nha more like 8 to 10 tops, He's weirdly competant in some ways weirdly incompetent in others, but his day to day functioning is that of a 8 to 10 year old and he quickly gets out of his depth.
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I'd say he worked about the same level as a 10 year old, but with practice of some things maybe as much as a standard teenager, but I doubt he'll ever think or act like an adult.​

- Mimms and Lucas Q&A

Glassshardballpit said:
15 years of following Chris. Oi.
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It can be hard to believe the incestuous freak has been a lolcow online for so long already. Someone born when he first gained online infamy could be going to high school.
 
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ToroidalBoat said:
I'd say he worked about the same level as a 10 year old, but with practice of some things maybe as much as a standard teenager, but I doubt he'll ever think or act like an adult.​

- Mimms and Lucas Q&A


It can be hard to believe the incestuous freak has been a lolcow online for so long already. Someone born when he first gained online infamy could be going to high school.
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And someone who was a teenager when he first came out will be paying bills and worrying about things that haven't happened yet.

Then there's Chris, who went from robbing the grave to robbing the cradle but not really cuz she's apparently 30.

Excuse me but what twisted shit is this?

Why is he dating/paling around with someone who looks like they're young enough to be my daughter?

I know I know she's not that young but come on; you would either have to go out of your way to find someone like that or fate would just have to drop someone like that in your lap.

On average, when do you even run into someone like that? I've come across a couple of short people in my life but it was only in passing. I'll see someone missing a leg every now and then that's just again in passing.

It's like the universe went out of its way to give someone to Chris (yes I'm aware she apparently contacted him at some point initially) who from a distance looks like the complete opposite of Barb, just to fuck with us.

I feel like an effort would need to be made, because this joke has never been funny.
 
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Hollywood Hulk Hogan said:
Eh all she's got going for her is that she's not fat. Which means she's already out of Chris's league
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I don't know whether to say she's an idiot for mixing up with Chris or she just got a lot of moxie.

As far as we know she got on the big birdie and hasn't been back since, so either she wised up that Chris was just too much of a handful or she wasn't getting paid enough.

Or maybe she was just that mad over not being able to go to a con.

Chris pretended that he was Sonichu for like a year and a half because he couldn't go to a con.

You know, what the average 40-year-old does when he doesn't get his way.

If they ever do get around to building a time machine and want to test subject, I'm voting Chris and Gettysburg.

He can be their drummer boy.
 
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Glassshardballpit said:
I don't know whether to say she's an idiot for mixing up with Chris or she just got a lot of moxie.

As far as we know she got on the big birdie and hasn't been back since, so either she wised up that Chris was just too much of a handful or she wasn't getting paid enough.

Or maybe she was just that mad over not being able to go to a con.

Chris pretended that he was Sonichu for like a year and a half because he couldn't go to a con.

You know, what the average 40-year-old does when he doesn't get his way.

If they ever do get around to building a time machine and want to test subject, I'm voting Chris and Gettysburg.

He can be their drummer boy.
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You forget that the Internet exists, which implies to me that she is having daily cybersex sessions with Chris CHAD from wherever in Finland, a distant magical land of snow and ice from Chris CHAD's perspective, she lives.

In fact, it is quite possible she is current pregnant with Chris CHAD's child, and may opt to give birth in Suomi rather than the USA!

You heard it prophesized here first on Kiwi Farms: A child shall be born of the seed of Sonichu's Prophet, not in the State for Lovers (Virginia), but in what the Greeks and Romans would have considered to be Hyperborea (Finland). Perhaps it will be a girl and Crystal Weston Chandler shall be an ice princess!

p.s.: some of you have mentioned that post from a r*dditor that said she sounded American. Note that lots of Danes, Norwegians, Swedes, and Finns can sound vaguely American. Something about people from that part of the world learning English makes them have somewhat American sounding accents, in contrast to Russkis and Poles and Germans.
 
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My Earnest Opinions said:
p.s.: some of you have mentioned that post from a r*dditor that said she sounded American. Note that lots of Danes, Norwegians, Swedes, and Finns can sound vaguely American. Something about people from that part of the world learning English makes them have somewhat American sounding accents, in contrast to Russkis and Poles and Germans.
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My grandparents, fresh off the boat from Norway, spoke ESL with very thick, heavy Norwegian accents. Not even remotely ‘American sounding.’
 
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Um... said:
My grandparents, fresh off the boat from Norway, spoke ESL with very thick, heavy Norwegian accents. Not even remotely ‘American sounding.’
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there's something about how younger Scandis learn English that make them sound more American, perhaps it's early exposure to American media


"The Scandinavian countries have been shown (as I remember) to have basically the highest English proficiency in Europe (excluding English-speaking countries of course) so it's definitely a trend. From the Norwegians I talk to, they attribute the high levels of proficiency (and near-native accents) to how little dubbing culture there is in Norway- so there's even more exposure to English than in, say, Germany, where lots of movies are dubbed into German. This is in addition to the fact that many Norwegians consider the Norwegian film/television industry "not very good" so they'll be more likely to watch foreign (ie English language) media. I'm not sure how similar the situation is in Sweden."


"Beyond the other very good answers (no dubbing culture, early instruction, language relationship), consider that one of the harder things to master in English is our vowel system. It's all kinds of messed up, and for people coming from more common 3/5/7 style vowel languages, or ones with only a length distinction. Swedish has most all of the vowels needed for English, and to make things easier, even tends to have lax vowels for their short vowels (a feature that's notoriously hard for speakers of many languages to get)"

with that being said, Finland isn't a Scandinavian country but it's still quite possible for a 30 year old (presumably born in 1993) autistic Finnish girl to have a more American accent because of spending much more time cons00ming American media than socializing with her Finnish peers (as you'd expect from someone who likely has known of Chris for years)
 
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Regarding etsy, I'm fairly certain (but not 100%) they count sales as per listing sold, not per transaction. 10 transactions of 10 items equals 100 sales by their accounting. Which makes a degree of sense if an unexpected one. So any etsy guess math should make that assumption I think.

Re Charlotte airport... ok let me see if I have facts vs the horseshit speculation in this thread right.

1. Flutter has never been seen driving - always Chris.
2. Flutter took a flight from Charlotte to Richmond. Unknown if Charlotte was her origin or a transfer/layover.


Charlotte to Richmond is not a huge drive but its not short either. If you dont drive or don't like to drive you might well take that hop. I think that only makes the following true:

Flutter does not live in the Richmond area.

Flutter likely does not live anywhere that would make a direct flight to Richmond vs a stop in Charlotte or make more sense for Chris to round trip fetch her.

So not within an hour or so of Richmond. Esp if Chris drove to Animate!

Airlines be wild but this likely rules out the DC/Maryland area (Dulles, Reagan, BWI, direct or drive) It also likely precludes Central and most of East NC (RDU direct or drive). While those airports might hop through Charlotte its not likely worthwhile for a Richmond destination.

It really doesn't rule out much else. Charlotte is a sizeable airport and while its not ATL or DIA or LAX its a substantial hub for a ton of connections and smaller destinations.

I can't say I know more about typical airline routes to know if any other areas are ruled out via Charlotte.

Which basically leaves..anywhere else in the usa given she did not come through customs at her destination but regular terminal exit per redditor.

It doesn't even rule out NC within drive of Charlotte.

I feel stupider for having made this post but I really think there's nothing to be gained here until someone manages to get a clearer photo or Chris fucks up and we get a name slip (that can actually be clearly heard. That recording wasn't it. Wtf ), or some other piece of information.
 
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I still think the most fruitful way to get her dox is to check people who interacted with Chris online, maybe even a couple years in the past. They claim she interacted with Chris only when he was in jail, but can we really take that statement at face value?

I have a hard time believing she spends all this time with Chris unless she in some sense, wants to. I think it's another Megan situation, one of the only actual galpals he ever had (of course he fucked that up). Even if she were paid, most of us wouldn't be able to tolerate that much Chris (or, any Chris). Even people who were tolerant of him have said they can only take him in small doses. With that said, I find it hard to believe that she didn't interact with him at some point online, it could have been something as small as liking a tweet or facebook post.
 
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