If it pleases the court, I'd like to explain. Apparently, I'm some kind of IPF fraudster now? Which is bananas because I'm out here barely affording my business expenses, but at the same time you think I'm swimmin in cash like Scrooge McDuck. It's like I'm living in some world where my wallet's both empty and overflowing. I'm not a broke joke, but I really can't afford these sanctions and Mr. Stalker over there doesn't deserve money from me either. Oddly, no one's asked if maybe my life's just weird and inconsistent sometimes. Yeah, sometimes I'm pinching pennies, but other times someone Venmos me a few dollars, and suddenly I'm a white collar criminal?
I've frauded nobody. I filled out the form the best I could with what I knew. Sure, maybe I didn't cross all the T's and I's, but I'm not trying to trick the court. That's not how this works, life's messy. And honestly, if this whole thing is too much for Hardin the Hardship to untangle, well, he can just close his eyes.