How are you doing? - Kiwi Farms Wellness Check

I found out last week that my sister has been emotionally abusing her kids for years. Her eldest daughter phoned me up panicking because she had self-harmed and was terrified that she would get in trouble if her mother found out. Apparently that is a thing that has happened in the past. Child safeguarding dismissed the anonymous report we left because, shock horror, the terrified children lied and told them everything was fine.

Husband and I are trying to facilitate the daughter's escape and support her emotionally, all while trying to act like nothing is going on so as not to raise suspicion. We have to talk with the daughter through Snapchat because my sister scours through her phone every day.

I've never been so angry in my life. The professional institutions that are supposed to deal with this sort of shit have been completely inept, and now we're left playing this fucked up game of subterfuge. It's exhausting.

Edit because my spelling sucks.
 
Bittersweet day today. I’m moving out of state in a few weeks and today was my last day in the office. Saying my goodbyes and got to my one coworker we’ve become friends outside of work. She followed me out to my car, gave me a hug and started crying, saying she was happy I’m moving on to better things but was really going to miss me and wants to stay friends and keep in touch. She’s still hugging me and says she doesn’t want to let go because when she does that’ll mean I’m gone for good then. Made me get a bit misty eyed. Oregon fucking sucks anymore and I’m glad I’m getting out but I’ll miss hanging out in person with my friends.
 
It is midnight and someone is outside with a fucking lawn mower. A loud ass riding lawn mower.

Honestly I hope they kill themselves doing that because fuck off it is almost midnight and some of us have jobs to go to in the morning the audacity of this absolute garbage pile white trash motherfucker.
 
Things are getting bad again. A couple of nights ago I had some sort of psychotic episode. I don’t know what the fuck is going on but my thoughts are really fucking killing me. I scared the shit out of multiple people that love me and I feel fucking horrible about it. I know that KF is the site to laugh at retards and not ramble about your personal life but it really feels like this is the only place I can do this. I just gotta ride it out but I don’t know if I can even do that.
 
I'm so sorry for you loss, mate, sending tons of virtual hugs your way. I lost my pet in January and it still stings - and I still catch myself looking towards the places in the apartment he usually hung around.
I lost my best friend of 12 years a couple of summers ago, it still stings. Sending hugs to both of you
I found out last week that my sister has been emotionally abusing her kids for years. Her eldest daughter phoned me up panicking because she had self-harmed and was terrified that she would get in trouble if her mother found out. Apparently that is a thing that has happened in the past. Child safeguarding dismissed the anonymous report we left because, shock horror, the terrified children lied and told them everything was fine.

Husband and I are trying to facilitate the daughter's escape and support her emotionally, all while trying to act like nothing is going on so as not to raise suspicion. We have to talk with the daughter through Snapchat because my sister scours through her phone every day.

I've never been so angry in my life. The professional institutions that are supposed to deal with this sort of shit have been completely inept, and now we're left playing this fucked up game of subterfuge. It's exhausting.

Edit because my spelling sucks.
I'm angry. Not at you, but bc how fucked up the system is. Wish you the best

Also I finished my second semester of college today!
 
paid off all my bills and rent I'm pretty certian im not being fired thank god almighty, but....my netflix, Hbo are gonna expire soon cause i'm broke again before i could get extensions/save to pay for them. My shudder has already been suspended and i cant get any of those renewed for two weeks. Honestly maybe i should just cancel everything stick to physical media and sites like 321 movies and watchcartoon...sure those sites arent as reliable as the high seas and could go down at any moment (and have) but part of me still wants to support stuff legitimately in some way.


oh well iit's a minor thing and it's just a matter of waiting for next payday, kinda makes me wish it wasn't biweekly but eh what can you do? Defiantly feeling better than the nervous wreck i was a week ago. Just hoping I'm looking at a long, tiring week of work again.
 
paid off all my bills and rent I'm pretty certian im not being fired thank god almighty, but....my netflix, Hbo are gonna expire soon cause i'm broke again before i could get extensions/save to pay for them. My shudder has already been suspended and i cant get any of those renewed for two weeks. Honestly maybe i should just cancel everything stick to physical media and sites like 321 movies and watchcartoon...sure those sites arent as reliable as the high seas and could go down at any moment (and have) but part of me still wants to support stuff legitimately in some way.
Is it okay to steal a loaf of bread if you're broke and starving? Except instead of stealing physical goods you right-click-save a picture of a loaf of bread instead of paying for the license.

I'm of the opinion that it's okay to do some piracy if you're in a rough spot financially. If you can pay you should pay but if you really can't afford it and everyone is talking about Game of Thrones or whatever then pirating it during a drought is no big deal, subscribe to HBO when you have money again. They didn't lose any money because you did not have any money and if you're a true media consoomer then you've probably put more money into the system as a whole than the average person. If it's physical media you can buy it at a later date to support it.

Same for video games with the exception of you not being able to buy the new $30 indie hotness because you spent $1000+ on a graphics card that month and you need the remaining disposable income to go out and drink and have food delivered to your door several times a week.


Anyway, I went back to visit my old workplace, things got reorganized and people got shuffled around. Not everyone was still there, other people got reorganized into new locales and corona really helped reorganizing people into new places and schedules. Wandering in during lunch to see the remaining few light up and treat me like a lost dog that found its way back home felt really good. My old bosses were also psyched and it turned into a 90 minute lunch break. Not just because of me, of course, they also wanted to hear about the other people that got moved. I'm also very long-winded so it takes a while.
 
Is it okay to steal a loaf of bread if you're broke and starving? Except instead of stealing physical goods you right-click-save a picture of a loaf of bread instead of paying for the license.

I'm of the opinion that it's okay to do some piracy if you're in a rough spot financially. If you can pay you should pay but if you really can't afford it and everyone is talking about Game of Thrones or whatever then pirating it during a drought is no big deal, subscribe to HBO when you have money again. They didn't lose any money because you did not have any money and if you're a true media consoomer then you've probably put more money into the system as a whole than the average person. If it's physical media you can buy it at a later date to support it.

Same for video games with the exception of you not being able to buy the new $30 indie hotness because you spent $1000+ on a graphics card that month and you need the remaining disposable income to go out and drink and have food delivered to your door several times a week.


Anyway, I went back to visit my old workplace, things got reorganized and people got shuffled around. Not everyone was still there, other people got reorganized into new locales and corona really helped reorganizing people into new places and schedules. Wandering in during lunch to see the remaining few light up and treat me like a lost dog that found its way back home felt really good. My old bosses were also psyched and it turned into a 90 minute lunch break. Not just because of me, of course, they also wanted to hear about the other people that got moved. I'm also very long-winded so it takes a while.
Yeah I know, it can always be worse. Being cold, hungry and without a home that is true misery that matters more than not being able to log on to an app to watch reruns of old shows. Am I bummed? A little but I'm already over it and glad for what I have.


Too bad the same cant be said for 90% of the Lolcows on this very forum
 
I absolutely abhor my job.
Not only am I basically the only person in my team that actually comes in at this point but someone has quit meaning that there's a strong possibility that I may have to take up the quitters schedules too, because my absolutely retarded nigger of a manager basically shat himself and did nothing to replace a teammate I am covering even now for 6. fucking. months. and counting. I am praying to God that my plans ATM go through because I absolutely know I can't handle this goddamn shit hole for another year
 
I feel weird.

I hate it when people from your past you haven't talked to in 10 years suddenly show up on your social media, acting like the break between you never happened. Or whatever happened between you that made you stop talking never happened. Talking to you like you're still the same person from 10 years ago, bringing up topics you've lost interest in ages ago. It just makes me feel uncomfortable and weirded out.

And for some reason, every time this happens, I have to think of this meme.

1619611517795.png
 
Been in talks with my higher ups about a promotion for a couple of weeks now. Looks like it's actually going to happen which is exciting.

In other news, yesterday I was put in charge of running our support line because our support guy just quit and they needed someone who's decent with people. So now I'm our sole in house developer, our requirements engineer, our data analyst and our support specialist.

Edit so I'm not double posting: Talks for that promotion are happening as we speak, it's coming sooner than a couple of weeks from now. Got a meeting today to discuss responsibilities, flexibility, overtime pay as required, etc. I'm both really excited and really stressed out.
 
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I feel weird.

I hate it when people from your past you haven't talked to in 10 years suddenly show up on your social media, acting like the break between you never happened. Or whatever happened between you that made you stop talking never happened. Talking to you like you're still the same person from 10 years ago, bringing up topics you've lost interest in ages ago. It just makes me feel uncomfortable and weirded out.

And for some reason, every time this happens, I have to think of this meme.

View attachment 2125296
I get you, but unless they're trying to sell you something or ask for help or recruit you into an MLM scam or something, or if whatever separated you was something really serious, you know... don't dismiss them out of hand.

God knows I've neglected many friendships by just not talking for a while and then feeling embarrassed to talk to them again. I often feel like reaching to old friends, reconnecting somehow, but I don't do it because I think I'll come off as you describe. The one time I built up the courage and talked to the guy who was once my best friend, he was just days away from moving to another country to pursue a job opportunity. We managed to talk for a couple days, and both regretted not reconnecting sooner.

So their intentions may be good, they might just want to rebuild a friendship they regret not keeping alive. And I think that's a valuable chance one shouldn't waste.

But if they talk to you about a business opportunity, then you can firmly but politely ask them to fuck off.
 
Ah.

Mopey dumb young retard shit below for anyone who wants to read:

It's been over a year since I broke up with my last ex. He used to be my best friend. He'd mentally clocked out of the relationship towards the end due to a mixture of depression and god knows what else since he never communicated with me clearly, and I got sick of trying to make things work so I left.

I'm still not fully over him, and we share a large mutual friends circle. If I want to hang out with them I'm going to have to deal with him being there. I am not ready. I get panic attacks just thinking about it.

I know our relationship was unhealthy, I was right to end it, and a large amount of the crazy whirlwind romance was pure lust and naïve youthful fantasy. I'm older and wiser and I should be 100% over him, especially since I have a new bf, but I'm not.

I fucking hate this. I want to switch the anxiety off when I'm in a room with him. I want to see our friends again.

AND on top of that, it's looking like those friends won't hang out with me if I don't get vaccinated in the coming months. I'm considering caving in but what if I do, go to a hangout and have a fucking panic attack the moment I spot him? Then the jab was for naught because I won't have my normal pre-2020 life back anyway. What if I never have it back?

Ugh. Sorry if this sounds like angsty highschooler shit. I know, I was dumb and young(er) and in infatuation and I should just be over it but I'm not and I don't understand why.

The future does not look bright.

Can't do a flip though, my family needs me.
 
Also hurting, pain levels range from a minor ouch all the way to pure agony - sciatica. Have surgery Monday to relieve pressure on sciatic nerve. Meds only help a certain amount. Most people dread the thought of Monday. I can't wait for this Monday!

Prolonged pain can be incapacitating and debilitating. Been dealing with this since first part of March, came right out of the blue. Pain's stopped me from walking 4-5 miles a day. These days can't even go to the commissary, one of my favorite things to do, without getting agonizing back spasms. The only time where I usually don't hurt is sitting in a chair. But the act of getting into the chair can be agony. This stuff is unpredictable. Motion X may not hurt one time, but the next time stabbing pains and weakness.

Nerve problems can be hell. Fuck that shit. 🖕
 
I get you, but unless they're trying to sell you something or ask for help or recruit you into an MLM scam or something, or if whatever separated you was something really serious, you know... don't dismiss them out of hand.

I can totally see where you're coming from, believe me. The problem goes a little deeper though, I just didn't want to power level or TMI, but let's just say they really fucked up any possible chances of ever reconnecting with me. The thought of just talking to them already makes me want to violently throw up.

If we just stopped talking because life happened or something - hey, no problem, I'm always up for a chat, you know? And I'm pretty sure most people look at it the way I do. So if you want to reconnect with old friends - try it, really. I doubt they'll dismiss you. Maybe they just feel as awkward as you do about it.
 
I can totally see where you're coming from, believe me. The problem goes a little deeper though, I just didn't want to power level or TMI, but let's just say they really fucked up any possible chances of ever reconnecting with me. The thought of just talking to them already makes me want to violently throw up.
Well, that's why I said "unless it was something very serious".
 
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