- Joined
- Apr 12, 2021
How are you doing? - Kiwi Farms Wellness Check
- Thread starter Milk Mage
- Start date
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🔧 Actively working on site again.
- Joined
- Oct 11, 2020
This is what happens when you’re not racist.
- Joined
- Apr 12, 2021
- Joined
- Aug 5, 2019
Brah.
Much better much better.
Sometimes life just takes you 100 mph and when it all slows down you look around gaze wondering how it all happened?
Much better much better.
Sometimes life just takes you 100 mph and when it all slows down you look around gaze wondering how it all happened?
- Joined
- Aug 1, 2021
Wah wah wah, woe is me etc. Everything's amazing with my close family but all is in shambles beyond that. Someone I deeply love decided they needed a divorce with their spouse for reasons I cannot condone and they are mad at me for my truthful answer after days of coddling to not stir the waters when they literally asked for my opinion. Someone I am very close to has just gotten a bad prognosis I have never seen anyone do well with. Random financial outcome we could have done nothing about, doesn't fuck up our lives but is unwelcome and delays an important goal, and that we could definitely do without. I do get to relax for a few days though, and am really thankful for those around me who are going above and beyond to alleviate my worries or at least distract me from them.
- Joined
- Feb 2, 2023
A bit bummed, but thankfully for a pretty petty reason. It's not a big deal.
^ I just watched this video. It wasn't great. I was interested at first, but the moment he got to the "present hells" bit and spent 8+ minutes ranting about no-name scammers talking about having been to hell I started tuning out. Solar Sands almost roped me back in again with the discussions of dystopia and infinite suffering produced through manmade immortality that followed the inane ramblings, but I think he placed too much emphasis on AI to the point where the last few minutes of the video sound like outright fearmongering. Classy of him to linger on that Palestinian hospital video while discussing unjust suffering (for a solid minute), too. Very timely.
A bit of a shame that this video's led to me considering another YouTuber going down the drain. I don't hold these guys to super high standards of quality; I just want them to invest or humor me. Solar Sands at his best was kind of a discount EmpLemon, but EmpLemon makes some great shit and Solar Sands' similarity hooked me as a result.
There's three of his videos in particular that I'd actually consider very good in their own right:
An ode to the unthinkably massive,
A video I mostly like for when it came out and how it affected me,
and just a solid video on a genuinely interesting topic that was paced very well.
He has some other good videos too- some of the shorter ones about simpler stuff like minimalist logos and obscurity come to mind- and the dude is a pretty solid storyteller.
Unfortunately, Solar Sands kind of fucks with tone a lot (multiple videos are 90% serious discussion, 10% him yelling at the camera or getting overly emotional- often without any real segue) and his editing isn't anywhere near as interesting as EmpLemon's, so he's kind of stuck in green Admiral Ackbar's shadow.
It doesn't help that, since the start of his "Doomed to be Replaced" series, he's kind of just been exaggerating his flaws and toning down his strengths. Leaning harder into his own anxieties about the world (especially AI) and expressing them in videos- which still mostly consist of panning across relevant images with maybe a few 3D sections here and there- instead of staying calm or analytical.
Combine that with a tendency to huff his own farts that's carried over from his DeviantArt Horrors days and you've got a bona-fide recipe for a dude I don't want to watch anymore.
Aside from that, I've been doing alright. Restarted Pokémon Unbound- a ROM hack I tried playing through a while ago but dropped maybe halfway through for a reason I can't remember- and I'm just not feeling it whatsoever. I think I'm just too burned out on Pokémon as a whole to enjoy it right now because it's honestly been decent so far. The first gym leader actually put up a fair fight (even if it was slightly cheap and stupidly-themed) which was a welcome change.
A bit of a shame that this video's led to me considering another YouTuber going down the drain. I don't hold these guys to super high standards of quality; I just want them to invest or humor me. Solar Sands at his best was kind of a discount EmpLemon, but EmpLemon makes some great shit and Solar Sands' similarity hooked me as a result.
There's three of his videos in particular that I'd actually consider very good in their own right:
An ode to the unthinkably massive,
A video I mostly like for when it came out and how it affected me,
and just a solid video on a genuinely interesting topic that was paced very well.
He has some other good videos too- some of the shorter ones about simpler stuff like minimalist logos and obscurity come to mind- and the dude is a pretty solid storyteller.
Unfortunately, Solar Sands kind of fucks with tone a lot (multiple videos are 90% serious discussion, 10% him yelling at the camera or getting overly emotional- often without any real segue) and his editing isn't anywhere near as interesting as EmpLemon's, so he's kind of stuck in green Admiral Ackbar's shadow.
It doesn't help that, since the start of his "Doomed to be Replaced" series, he's kind of just been exaggerating his flaws and toning down his strengths. Leaning harder into his own anxieties about the world (especially AI) and expressing them in videos- which still mostly consist of panning across relevant images with maybe a few 3D sections here and there- instead of staying calm or analytical.
Combine that with a tendency to huff his own farts that's carried over from his DeviantArt Horrors days and you've got a bona-fide recipe for a dude I don't want to watch anymore.
Aside from that, I've been doing alright. Restarted Pokémon Unbound- a ROM hack I tried playing through a while ago but dropped maybe halfway through for a reason I can't remember- and I'm just not feeling it whatsoever. I think I'm just too burned out on Pokémon as a whole to enjoy it right now because it's honestly been decent so far. The first gym leader actually put up a fair fight (even if it was slightly cheap and stupidly-themed) which was a welcome change.
The most interesting thing that's happened to me recently was probably my rediscovering of the legitimate conspiracy behind my friend group. I thought I was making that shit up when looking back on my memories with them because it was kind of absurd, but no it's actually real and I ended up being able to confirm it with multiple sources. There are multiple layers of secret societies deriving from this stupid fucking hobby and it's the pettiest bullshit imaginable but I can't look away. I wish I could make a thread on it or something but 1) I'm on the outside looking in, unable to scrounge up enough substantial info for a thread (i'm maybe 20% of the way there and it's all secondhand) 2) It'd lead back to me WAY too easily if I ever made a thread and 3) It's directly related to the hobby, which is niche enough for the societies to control almost every single aspect of it. Said societies also don't want their existence known about and have soviet-style unpersoned people for revealing them multiple times in the past so if I still want to engage with this stuff (which I do) then I can't really make a thread on them.
I fucking wish I could, though. If by some miracle I ever get enough stuff to write about it, I might do a hail mary and give it a shot.
Probably not though. And I doubt there's any way I'd be able to get that stuff without interacting more with people I desperately want to leave, so...
I fucking wish I could, though. If by some miracle I ever get enough stuff to write about it, I might do a hail mary and give it a shot.
Probably not though. And I doubt there's any way I'd be able to get that stuff without interacting more with people I desperately want to leave, so...
- Joined
- Nov 14, 2017
It's been really hard going through life knowing that women are literally, unironically evil. I've always denied that shit as incel horseshit, but I have no rational explanation for why the more pessimistic and hateful I am towards female behavior, the better I am able to expect and predict it. I truly have started to think modern narratives are wrong and a more biologically compatible narrative would be that females universally seek resources from males (and other females around them, when they can get it.
I'm not sure a woman could convince me they actually *love* a male.
Like, I carelessy dated a woman who intellectually I didn't respect expecting horseshit in the end, seeing the horseshit, and playing things in a way to scare them away from further horseshit...
Really it's been gnawing at me so much.
My parents thought I was in love with her.
My ex that I was fooled.
I never thought I was a convincing actor.
Have I really become so manipulative? They really thought I was in love with that psycho?
But I wasn't.
I've seen it before. Again and again and again.
I can't normally dance, but I knew all the moves.
She didn't even see I knew her own part.
She was quite shocked when I struck back at her libel in a manner incompatible with what she'd seen from me before, right at the heart what would hurt her.
She didn't even know I knew where she'd post it. I literally parked my fake FB account in the group a day before.
I can't believe people around me were fooled. I know what I look like in love., It wasn't like that... was it?
I used to think I was mentally ill, deep down. But I finessed this with my "mental illness."
Do the people around me really know me?
My mother, serious-joked (it was true) that she was more upset with me breaking up with my ex than I was.
My ex tried to embarrass me to my mother in text, because I told her friend my ex had BPD ( knowing that fat fuck would repeat it and everything else I said to her, to piss her using feminist ass off).
But what I said in that conversation was said knowing that what SHE said to me was designed to craft a narrative to others in mind. To share the conversation.
But I'm not a dumb virgin.
I've seen BPD-fu plenty of times.
I knew full well, so I made sure to confront her behavior in text with how she talked about wanting to fuck other guys with me, how she said "I love you" to me FIRST, which I know she didn't tell her friends.
Her head was so far up her ass and she followed the same narrative she probably used with every guy, she did the same thing without deviating from my script.
Responded the way she planned, little attention to what I just told her.
Which revealed her intentions.
Her narrative therefore become obviously fake and crafted.
My parting shot to her friend was "confiding" that I faked agreeing with any of her politics and that I probably agreed with fat friend's boyfriend's politics more than my ex's socialist horseshit. I did lie. Hehe.
And fat friend repeated it.
As planned, and my ex reacted, as planned.
Finessed.
For the first time in my life, truly, I master planned and it went according to plan. With nobody to really appreciate my odd and deviant moves, but here I am.
And I'm stunned.
So, again, when she struck back at me she showed my mother chat logs to turn her against me.
But it had the opposite effect. My mother read them and, in my complete shock, told me she read them entirely and she could tell she crafted them for others to read.
In that moment I respected my mother more than ever. Most people can't see through that BPD horseshit... but my own mother, who never takes my side, did? And my own dumb fucking ex told me point blank my mother is really good at figuring out shit (kind of like that).
My ex failed in whatever she was after with trying to keep me around her finger.
I got what I wanted. And she's a little afraid of me, though she won't admit it.
I'm really bothered how well I navigated a relationship I knew was gonna be toxic just to get what I wanted. I played the player and I'm kind of stunned because I thought I was just delusional.
I guess I'm not.
I decided to take a walk through the valley of the shadow of death in my own personal life and came out fine because I knew how it went.
But now I'm very bothered by the very fact that I have so much anxiety about so much shit, yet that was so easy.
How can I believe in love after that wild story?
I'm not sure a woman could convince me they actually *love* a male.
Like, I carelessy dated a woman who intellectually I didn't respect expecting horseshit in the end, seeing the horseshit, and playing things in a way to scare them away from further horseshit...
Really it's been gnawing at me so much.
My parents thought I was in love with her.
My ex that I was fooled.
I never thought I was a convincing actor.
Have I really become so manipulative? They really thought I was in love with that psycho?
But I wasn't.
I've seen it before. Again and again and again.
I can't normally dance, but I knew all the moves.
She didn't even see I knew her own part.
She was quite shocked when I struck back at her libel in a manner incompatible with what she'd seen from me before, right at the heart what would hurt her.
She didn't even know I knew where she'd post it. I literally parked my fake FB account in the group a day before.
I can't believe people around me were fooled. I know what I look like in love., It wasn't like that... was it?
I used to think I was mentally ill, deep down. But I finessed this with my "mental illness."
Do the people around me really know me?
My mother, serious-joked (it was true) that she was more upset with me breaking up with my ex than I was.
My ex tried to embarrass me to my mother in text, because I told her friend my ex had BPD ( knowing that fat fuck would repeat it and everything else I said to her, to piss her using feminist ass off).
But what I said in that conversation was said knowing that what SHE said to me was designed to craft a narrative to others in mind. To share the conversation.
But I'm not a dumb virgin.
I've seen BPD-fu plenty of times.
I knew full well, so I made sure to confront her behavior in text with how she talked about wanting to fuck other guys with me, how she said "I love you" to me FIRST, which I know she didn't tell her friends.
Her head was so far up her ass and she followed the same narrative she probably used with every guy, she did the same thing without deviating from my script.
Responded the way she planned, little attention to what I just told her.
Which revealed her intentions.
Her narrative therefore become obviously fake and crafted.
My parting shot to her friend was "confiding" that I faked agreeing with any of her politics and that I probably agreed with fat friend's boyfriend's politics more than my ex's socialist horseshit. I did lie. Hehe.
And fat friend repeated it.
As planned, and my ex reacted, as planned.
Finessed.
For the first time in my life, truly, I master planned and it went according to plan. With nobody to really appreciate my odd and deviant moves, but here I am.
And I'm stunned.
So, again, when she struck back at me she showed my mother chat logs to turn her against me.
But it had the opposite effect. My mother read them and, in my complete shock, told me she read them entirely and she could tell she crafted them for others to read.
In that moment I respected my mother more than ever. Most people can't see through that BPD horseshit... but my own mother, who never takes my side, did? And my own dumb fucking ex told me point blank my mother is really good at figuring out shit (kind of like that).
My ex failed in whatever she was after with trying to keep me around her finger.
I got what I wanted. And she's a little afraid of me, though she won't admit it.
I'm really bothered how well I navigated a relationship I knew was gonna be toxic just to get what I wanted. I played the player and I'm kind of stunned because I thought I was just delusional.
I guess I'm not.
I decided to take a walk through the valley of the shadow of death in my own personal life and came out fine because I knew how it went.
But now I'm very bothered by the very fact that I have so much anxiety about so much shit, yet that was so easy.
How can I believe in love after that wild story?
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- Joined
- Apr 13, 2019
Not bad. The chick I'm banging told me that I'm intimidating yesterday and I'm still processing that shit.
- Joined
- Aug 7, 2017
- Joined
- Oct 11, 2020
So are you turning gay @Harbinger of Kali Yuga? Gays are easy and dumb, but you wont experience any love with them either.
The man hate thread here and I'm lurking at a site that translates to "Woman guide", and the man hate there is over the charts, and all hell breaks loose when you say they are femcels. Which they are, but people usually don't like to be told the truth.
Even though I'm a gaycel, I'm happy that I'm not straight. Because fuck, straight men have it tough.
The man hate thread here and I'm lurking at a site that translates to "Woman guide", and the man hate there is over the charts, and all hell breaks loose when you say they are femcels. Which they are, but people usually don't like to be told the truth.
Even though I'm a gaycel, I'm happy that I'm not straight. Because fuck, straight men have it tough.
- Joined
- Jul 22, 2015
Move out, mate. I've lived it, it wrecks you, destroys your relationships both in and outside of the house, and leaves permanent scars in your brain. Live in your car if you have to.
I (Don't) Have A Gun
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- May 13, 2021
Been up and down with me for a while now, mostly down.
But things are looking up! Things have been going fine at my new job, been taking a bit better care of my health... Gonna go to a Halloween party today, think I'm in a good mental space to socialise a bit again.
But things are looking up! Things have been going fine at my new job, been taking a bit better care of my health... Gonna go to a Halloween party today, think I'm in a good mental space to socialise a bit again.
- Joined
- Oct 24, 2023
Feeling good, I finally swapped my laptop's battery. And null also fixed the email, so I got my activation link. Also this is my first reply.
- Joined
- Mar 30, 2023
- Joined
- Nov 14, 2017
I'd make a terrible faggot; I gag too much when I'm brushing my teeth.
- Joined
- Mar 30, 2023
Well turns out my surgery is actually tomorrow thanks to a miscommunication.
And by miscommunication I mean the doctor explicitly said that he'd tentatively book me in for today but it was going to be sometime tomorrow, but my parents who are carrying me around were adamant that the actual surgery was today and I went with it as I assumed they heard the doctor say something I wasn't paying attention to
And by miscommunication I mean the doctor explicitly said that he'd tentatively book me in for today but it was going to be sometime tomorrow, but my parents who are carrying me around were adamant that the actual surgery was today and I went with it as I assumed they heard the doctor say something I wasn't paying attention to
GuitarRevi
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jan 4, 2020
40th birthday present from the Mrs. Feeling good getting ready for a night out
- Joined
- Apr 18, 2021
I want to, I really do. But I've got my younger brother, I'm not leaving him to fend for himself. I know I'm not getting out of this mentally ok, but he can still be helped.
- Joined
- Oct 11, 2020
Don't worry, there are bottoms that are nazi about tops not liking dick. As in, a top should never touch dick. Ever.
If he's under 18, you could maybe get CPS involved?
- Joined
- Dec 28, 2014
Roofing is the main reason you fall off a roof.