I felt better lately, especially that my depression has molten away considerably, and I started to think positively and start to focus more accurately; and becoming more social and talkative as an result. As of in, I am currently helping out my sister on her last 2 exams before her internship; as well as family bonding and ready for participating in relatives, friends' weddings; specific events and even my cherished family members, friends' funeral feast to confide each other very well. I will be also taking mental therapy after my sister's exam, in which I have broad amount of time to go outside, enjoying nature, going out with my friends and coworkers. Whilst depression is extremely serious business, it is still recoverable.
Life was fucking boring as shit if you kept attaching your eyes on the internet; as work and reality is your general priority; and for kids, schools, exams and graduation. I much rather want to go outside, self-sustaining, and enjoy life whilst keeping my very own misanthropy, nihilism, cynicism away for a while to enjoy what it could provide. Even if I never be a narcissistic fuck, I should be proud of what I am for a while, whilst being humble and keep laughing and being positive like a retard over retards being retards.
Kitten season is off to a terrible start already. I heard a kitten crying for awhile but couldn't find it. It was further away than I thought because I'm on the 2nd floor and the alley between houses amplifies sounds. Eventually the kitten stopped. I'm hoping that mama cat found it or the lady that feeds cats across the yard did. The crying sounded like it was over that way. And if the kitten was in one of the cat houses or the lady grabbed it then it should be fine.
But what I didn't know at the time was that the guy downstairs found a dead kitten in the alley earlier in the morning. He said a cat was moving kittens back there last night. She might have gotten spooked by the yappy dogs next door that never shut up. The kitten looked about four weeks old. Very healthy looking and pudgy. So I'm thinking hypothermia. It was around 45 last night. I wish I had heard it. But I slept with the fan on because this idiot was arguing with a guy about sitting on his steps and it just went on and on.
I don't ever want to see a dead kitten again. It's heart breaking. We need more TNR around here and people need to get their cats fixed. If you aren't going to do it then don't get a cat.
I got through the death of my first cat, as well as dogs, as it hits hard right at home as much as I lost my grandmother, grandfather, uncle and cousin and other people whom I softened up and see as being precious people. A death of someone you are close with, or to neglected animals truly heartbroken me and makes me both apathetic, sad, and agitated for how much time goes by, and people are slowly deteriorating in terms of mentality and physicality of their health. Much to that, death of negligence to anything is absolutely going to make me draw the line because of how retarded they are if they intended to provide a cat their much needed warmth, home sweet home; or people things they much needed.
And so, I still mourn over my closest people or pets' death in spite of my stone cold viewpoint and serious business attitude. Retards these days will soon deeply regret what they have done and over their severe incompetence, indecisiveness and self-importance of their own ego.