How are you doing? - Kiwi Farms Wellness Check

I was pretty sure that I was getting sick since I've been very tired and achy since last Thursday or so, my muscles aren't recovering from working out very well. I also thought that it could be the really abrupt temperature change, it was 80 last week and it's 60 this week. But just yesterday I remembered that I went dessert/soda/candy/baked whatever free last month and continued with that until last week when I made ice cream sandwiches. I've had some ice cream each night on top of some smaller treats (a international snack subscription box might have happened) so I think the sugar is what made me feel like shit. I feel like I've read that sugar is dehydrating so that's one reason my muscles feel terrible. Finished all the ice cream and I'm going to be sparing with the small treats so hopefully I'll feel more energetic very soon.
 
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People love to say things like "when you're 18, you think you have it all figured out," and then smuckle.

That wasn't my experience at all. My late teens were, for me, a time of profound uncertainty and doubt.

I may be mistaken, but it seems to me the same people who say they were cocksure and unwilling to be questioned at that age are now bitter, resentful adults with miserable lives resulting from their own self-assured stupidity.

I was right all along. Eat my ass.
 
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I just returned from my tropical vacation. Unfortunately, most of the shops and restaurants were closed. As in most places, I was legally obligated to wear a mask, but the conditions were so sweltering that I kept mine off except for when I was told to. The worst part about it was the multitude of forms I was required to complete to travel to another area in my country, most of which weren't checked by airport security and only exist to dissuade people from travelling.

Fuck Bill Gates for getting the world to fuck itself over for the flu.
 
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Have you ever had the crippling realization that once again, you're putting all your eggs in one basket? There's someone who's changed your life for the better, again. She's the most beautiful woman you've ever met, not necessarily externally, but internally, where it matters to you, she's perfect. You feel something there, something you haven't felt for a person, let alone a woman, in years, but you don't want to ruin that one good thing you have in your life by misinterpreting 'care', because you know for a goddamn fact she cares, but you care far too much.

That extremely specific situation is me right now. I went from being the happiest guy in the world to tearing my hair out in the span of a conversation.
 
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MerriedxReldnahc said:
I was pretty sure that I was getting sick since I've been very tired and achy since last Thursday or so, my muscles aren't recovering from working out very well. I also thought that it could be the really abrupt temperature change, it was 80 last week and it's 60 this week. But just yesterday I remembered that I went dessert/soda/candy/baked whatever free last month and continued with that until last week when I made ice cream sandwiches. I've had some ice cream each night on top of some smaller treats (a international snack subscription box might have happened) so I think the sugar is what made me feel like shit. I feel like I've read that sugar is dehydrating so that's one reason my muscles feel terrible. Finished all the ice cream and I'm going to be sparing with the small treats so hopefully I'll feel more energetic very soon.
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Are you sure you aren't cutting your carbs a bit too much? I've heard that can cause decreased immunity.
 
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I am doing a lot better than I was a couple of weeks ago. Especially now that my boss is giving me more responsibility, which means I will be working in the office more and from home less. Such a simple change can radically modify my outlook on life almost immediately.
 
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As @Wraith implied, there might be some interesting madness revealed today...Looking forward to the lizard gang war.
 
NotSendingTheirBest said:
A person who I considered friend made me regret being open with him and basically went over all my pressure points one by one.
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I've had that happen to me before.

I-Know-That-Feel-Bro.jpg
 
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As I said I'm in the red on my bank account till Monday and got things to pay. I don't know if I got funeral pay or not for the time off I had to take off since it's not mandatory in NJ. Really the first step towards getting everything in order would be to find out what I'm getting. And then trying to balance my budget as best as I can. This year is beyond fucked up and I just need something to get my mind at ease
 
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Cut out a member of my family. It wasn't easy, and it's gonna make Thanksgiving very awkward, but I did what I had to do. Hoping it was the right call.

Meantime, still thinking about that girl. She's such an oddball that I can't read her or anything, but whatever. I'll just try and see if something comes of it. If not, it's not like I have much to look forward to anyhow.

Birthday's about two months away now. I'm no more certain of what I wanted to do than I was when I first stepped into college 4 years ago, but I want to be better. For her, yeah, but also for me. I'm rather enjoying being normal, even if it's pretty hard to rein in the worst parts of me.
 
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Third round of layoffs this year starts Monday. Coworkers ask how I'm so calm about it, but I've had almost two decades of practice hiding how angry I am all the time. My mask is made of iron at this point. I think about killing myself most days now, but I stopped drinking a couple weeks ago so I probably won't actually do it. Spending a work night drunk with a gun in your mouth is a Panama recommended way to quit cold turkey.
 
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