How are you doing? - Kiwi Farms Wellness Check

This Covid-shit is making me go insane - thanks to it, the area I'm working in has become practically dead. So I'm pretty much stuck with a shitty side-job (it gets the bills paid, but still) and way too much free time to think about the fact that I'm stuck in life like this.
I feel like screaming. It's not even making me depressed, it's just making me frustrated and angry at this point.

I'm probably being overdramatic, I know.
I just can't help it right now.
 
Got some blood test results. My consultant contacted me as soon as he got them and he wants to see me in 3 days. Usually it takes 3 months to get an appointment with him. I suspect it's not because he wants to congratulate me on having really awesome blood.

Update - after 3 years of feeling like shit and barely being able to function I have an actual diagnosis! Won't say what due to PL but he reckons he can fix it with a few pills.
 
They're finally lifting the lockdowns where I live, except on weekends because... I don't fucking know. But I know the "revolutionaries" here are planning to celebrate the anniversary of the riots from last year. God... Sunday's going to be a complete shitshow.
 
Work's been weird lately, so I took a paid day off today. Went and got a quick checkup at the doctor while I was out- my blood pressure is slowly but surely dropping. Hoping to be in the healthy range by next year.

Our store wanted to stock Blue Lives Matter merchandise but, predictably, there was a recall. Problem- my dumbass underlings put the shit out when I told them 'leave it in the crates while I make sure DC isn't smoking a literal ton of crack cocaine by making me sell these to this half-bleeding heart liberal, half closet Klansman town. Sure enough, DC issued the recall and now I'm in hot water because we both got in a social media scandal AND we sold about a quarter of the stock before I was able to get my team's head out of their collective ass and get the stuff back to DC. I gotta go in bright and early tomorrow and fill out a bunch of paperwork on the whole thing and then I gotta get a 'dressing down' from HR, along with the rest of management.
 
I'm nearing my 3rd month in a new job. All my new coworkers, and my manager, are super supportive and helpful. I'm overjoyed to not be in an environment where everyone avoids work, putting me in the position to carry the extra workload (like my previous job). I'm also going on 2 months of being in counseling, which has helped with my stress and overall state of mind. Feels real nice to not be miserable all the time.
 
Tested negative for COVID but still have to quarantine until the 27th. Problem is my new temp job starts on the 26th so I’ll have to talk to them about it. On the plus side my last two weeks are days off. I’ve also gotten my extracurricular activities easily rescheduled for my new work schedule so that’s good. That being said I still have a lot on my mind. Both my parents told me they are proud of me and were honored to watch me grow up and I got teary eyed. It hit me right then and there how lucky I am to have them, it also got me wondering am I meant for more? It’s odd I know but some part of me was saying I am meant for more than just blue collar labor. I think it’s because I want to honor my parents for their love and support. Back on the topic of the new job, that nervousness has died down a bit I’m not as terrified of the new job as I was before. But I’m still nervous about the change from part time to full time. I struggle to wake up before 9:00am (I can wake up before then but always have the urge to sleep in) and this job starts at 7:00am. Some times I wonder if I am actually ready for adulthood. Hell it’s made me realize how good I had it in high school and college.
 
I went to early voting snd stood in line with people evil eyeing each other for two hours.
The guy in front of me reminded me of the Dean from "community", he finally shamed me for only being five feet 11 inches away and radiated pure homo energy as he read his newspaper. I could almost feel Clay Aiken about to sing. Everybody is talking about Jamie.

I briefly had a thought of smashing my big gulp against the side of his head but random people kept taking photos and videos of our voting que. .I was listening to one of my asshole scifi spacewar books loudly on headphones and I finished book 3.
 
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I'll be completely honest, the last time I posted here, everything was going alright and then it somehow came crashing down. I'm in that sort of hazy feeling of not giving a shit and not having the mental capacity to care due to everything and I won't be surprised if I get Donnie Darko'ed and have a Jet engine crash into my house.
 
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