How are you doing? - Kiwi Farms Wellness Check

[Saddam Hussain Obama]

mood swings tbh sometimes ive been feeling almost suicidal and sad but other times im super happy i don't know what it is but im either one or the other

 

[Geddy Lee's Fee and See]

I keep on thinking "I wouldn't be single if I just talked to more women", but at the same time, I have to admit, I found and still do find most women I've been about as interesting as bread. They are attractive, but it's extremely clear we have different interests and ways of life. I torn between giving up and just remaining single for the long haul or just praying to find a woman that I'd actually be interested in. I don't even have unrealistic standards like she must be into everything prog rock/metal band I'm into (I really just want a woman with the same faith, similar values and similar enough tastes that we have something to talk about on the surface layer and then get more personal from there) and I still find it fucking difficult to look for a mate. I refuse to use dating apps just out of the principle that the Internet shouldn't bleed into my real life and the absolute state of them (plus, the people that run them don't have your happiness in mind just profit). I'm so frustrated right now and it's been this way this entire year.

A silver lining is that one of my older sisters gave birth to a kid and I'm visiting the other for Christmas, so not everything is this infuriating.

 

[AnOminous]

I know it's not the most obscure song in the world, but even that song is foreign to all the other people in my generation that I have ever known.

You need better friends because anyone who doesn't love that song is a faggot, not even just a homosexual, but an absolute faggot, in the worst sense of the word.

I bet they wouldn't even like Roky Erickson.

 

[Harbinger of Kali Yuga]

I keep on thinking "I wouldn't be single if I just talked to more women", but at the same time, I have to admit, I found and still do find most women I've been about as interesting as bread. They are attractive, but it's extremely clear we have different interests and ways of life. I torn between giving up and just remaining single for the long haul or just praying to find a woman that I'd actually be interested in. I don't even have unrealistic standards like she must be into everything prog rock/metal band I'm into (I really just want a woman with the same faith, similar values and similar enough tastes that we have something to talk about on the surface layer and then get more personal from there) and I still find it fucking difficult to look for a mate. I refuse to use dating apps just out of the principle that the Internet shouldn't bleed into my real life and the absolute state of them (plus, the people that run them don't have your happiness in mind just profit). I'm so frustrated right now and it's been this way this entire year.

A silver lining is that one of my older sisters gave birth to a kid and I'm visiting the other for Christmas, so not everything is this infuriating.

The problem is, women are very socially-oriented creatures, and our society sucks, therefore our women will reflect is. You kind of need to give up on the idea that you will find a woman you have "a lot" in common with. You won't. They're not the same as men, no matter how much they insist. Women are very reactive to men, they sort of become what their current male fixation is... the women will negrate me, but the men will know just how much a woman's values can change depending on the guy she's dating. You kind of have to find the right woman and mold her into perfection.

 

[Friend of Dorothy Parker]

I could snack on olives all day

I have given you SO MUCH, and now I find out about this????

God help you and us all.

Music is one of the few things that give me joy in life, and I can't even share that with another person

So? Why do you need other people to like things that matter to you personally? I mean, it's nice to connect, but I have never felt like I needed anyone else to know/like everything I do, even within music, which is a huge and important part of my life. My love of music is personal. Love to share, but as far as making friends or a relationship, not at all an absolute requirement, beyond a certain point.

And yes, Morrissey is "obscure," even amongst my age cohort (around for the Smiths, and teens at the time of Morrissey's earliest solo work), but it's kind of silly to rest compatibility on specific likes/dislikes. If I based compatibility on whether someone had ever heard of Manau or Bally Sagoo, or dug the Hot Fives & Hot Sevens, I wouldn't have had a date since 1995.

They want to eat hamburgers, I want to eat Indian or Vietnamese or something.

People have told me "it's better in the cities," but

That is a choice. You will find people with wider ranges of interests in cities, but if you aren't willing to go where people are, you can't really complain.

you find someone with X interest in something and then you quickly discover they're also a faggot brony or something. I'm tired of rolling the dice with people, you always lose!

It's unlikely you'll find someone/people who share your exact list of things you like 1:1. It may be that you've set up a no-win paradigm in your mind.

 

[Vapor Sauce]

I keep on thinking "I wouldn't be single if I just talked to more women", but at the same time, I have to admit, I found and still do find most women I've been about as interesting as bread. They are attractive, but it's extremely clear we have different interests and ways of life. I torn between giving up and just remaining single for the long haul or just praying to find a woman that I'd actually be interested in. I don't even have unrealistic standards like she must be into everything prog rock/metal band I'm into (I really just want a woman with the same faith, similar values and similar enough tastes that we have something to talk about on the surface layer and then get more personal from there) and I still find it fucking difficult to look for a mate. I refuse to use dating apps just out of the principle that the Internet shouldn't bleed into my real life and the absolute state of them (plus, the people that run them don't have your happiness in mind just profit). I'm so frustrated right now and it's been this way this entire year.

I think dating is just a pain in the ass in general now. People seem to be so on edge about everything and I think women tend to avoid relationships when they feel society at large is unstable. Best advice I, as random internet tard, can give is to focus on the things within your control and let things outside of that fall into place.

 

[Um...]

You are right that fear of the future is paralysing me. It's all just a lot, if I could just get one thing under control that would help but everything keeps slipping away.

I’m really sorry you’re going through this. I was in the same exact spot a few years ago- lost my job (one of the most stressful things that can happen to a person,) lost my home (ditto 10/10 on the stress scale,) applying for job after job and being rejected every time (totally dehumanizing experience,) running through my savings and panicking about how out ofcontrol everything was, and the primal fear of becoming homeless.

I've never experienced anything like this before and it's brutal. I am usually a calm and relatively stoic person but too much insecurity can break anyone, apparently. Just gotta keep breathing.

You’re absolutely right, that panic clouds your thinking and paralyzes you. And those accumulated stressors are emotionally and mentally draining. Give yourself credit for surviving all this and yes, keep breathing. Analyze your situation and possible solutions/ways out. Do it calmly, putting the panic aside. You will adapt and survive. You can do this.

 

[Geddy Lee's Fee and See]

The problem is, women are very socially-oriented creatures, and our society sucks, therefore our women will reflect is. You kind of need to give up on the idea that you will find a woman you have "a lot" in common with. You won't. They're not the same as men, no matter how much they insist. Women are very reactive to men, they sort of become what their current male fixation is... the women will negrate me, but the men will know just how much a woman's values can change depending on the guy she's dating. You kind of have to find the right woman and mold her into perfection.

I think there are plenty of women out there that are at least have similar interests, goals and values as me. They just aren't where I am right now. I'm not to worried about it. It's a waste of time trying to figure out why women I don't know nor care about don't like me and vice versa.

I think dating is just a pain in the ass in general now. People seem to be so on edge about everything and I think women tend to avoid relationships when they feel society at large is unstable. Best advice I, as random internet tard, can give is to focus on the things within your control and let things outside of that fall into place.

It's really all you can do. Fortume helps those that help themselves and worrying about shit I can't change isn't helping anyone, me most of all.

 

[anustart76]

I think there are plenty of women out there that are at least have similar interests, goals and values as me. They just aren't where I am right now. I'm not to worried about it. It's a waste of time trying to figure out why women I don't know nor care about don't like me and vice versa.

Sometimes I think all the decent women within my age range are already married, and all that's left are the ones that aren't worth talking to.

Well my internet went out again, the guy fixed it, but it went out for a minute or two again just a few minutes ago. Not feeling great about it.
Going to visit family for Christmas, it'll be nice to see them but probably very boring.
I wonder if I should just start looking at new jobs even though it's only been like 6 months. Then by the time I actually get one it'll probably have been a year. I don't know, maybe I'm just not meant to work in a typical office type job.

 

[Doctor John B. Zyklon]

Kalamata

savory

Guess I'll be on the look out.

You kind of need to give up on the idea that you will find a woman you have "a lot" in common with. You won't. They're not the same as men, no matter how much they insist. Women are very reactive to men, they sort of become what their current male fixation is... the women will negrate me, but the men will know just how much a woman's values can change depending on the guy she's dating.

He's right you know.
Don't focus on having tons in common. Frankly, I wouldn't want to have everything in common. You should want and need your foundation, your values and morals to be aligned. You want the yin to your yang.

As far as values change; yep. Argue whether they have no will / strong core values or are merely chameleons; it doesn't matter in this context. Their values will change. "I don't know why, but your strong opinions and being conservative just...attract me; I don't know why" -Several feminist / left wing exes.

You kind of have to find the right woman and mold her into perfection.

You're literally looking for fertile ground. Both for your seed and for you to develop a wife and relationship.

I wonder if I should just start looking at new jobs even though it's only been like 6 months.

If you dislike your job, I would. My last manager had a new job every 8-12 months until he landed the gig. He was an awful manager mind you but whatever.

 

[Blobby's Murder Knife]

I think dating is just a pain in the ass in general now. People seem to be so on edge about everything and I think women tend to avoid relationships when they feel society at large is unstable. Best advice I, as random internet tard, can give is to focus on the things within your control and let things outside of that fall into place.

The only good thing about the internet is that as long as you both aren't coomers (rainbows), you can spend weeks and months just talking about things that are important to both of you morally, religiously, politically, about your shared interests and not so shared ones. Have fun flirting, you learn each other on a deeper level first than can be had with conventional dating. So you have all this base level knowledge that then makes it clear to you whether or not to meet up. Generally speaking, once you do, it is no different than what you had online and even better. Can finally look into his eyes, snuggle into his chest, and continue IRL shitposting hehe.

I couldn't deal with standard dating. I've been too oversocialized by the interwebz. I have never used dating apps either. It was all on retard autistic forums, chat programs, other online groups, etc I met these men.

I think there are plenty of women out there that are at least have similar interests, goals and values as me. They just aren't where I am right now. I'm not to worried about it. It's a waste of time trying to figure out why women I don't know nor care about don't like me and vice versa.

Well same, but I am a woman. I have a very difficult time finding men who I resonate with. And fuck no I am not looking for muscled rich gigachad retards. I am just looking for men who have certain qualities that only I am specifically are looking for. It is pretty niche, but I can find them. I am open to distance though because I know I am so autistic that is fine. Doing this next week.

Sometimes I think all the decent women within my age range are already married, and all that's left are the ones that aren't worth talking to.

So are most men at my age. Is what it is. I also have very much accepted that by the time I am my age a lot of us have a lot of baggage. So do I, so eh who am I to be like I only want a man with none? I couldn't even relate to him I think.

 

[anustart76]

So are most men at my age. Is what it is. I also have very much accepted that by the time I am my age a lot of us have a lot of baggage. So do I, so eh who am I to be like I only want a man with none? I couldn't even relate to him I think.

By "baggage" I'm assuming you mean from previous relationships? I don't have that problem, but for men it's like job-hunting. You have to have experience to get experience, and nobody wants a guy without experience.

 

[The Skeksis Emperor]

I was in the same exact spot a few years ago- lost my job (one of the most stressful things that can happen to a person,) lost my home (ditto 10/10 on the stress scale,) applying for job after job and being rejected every time (totally dehumanizing experience,) running through my savings and panicking about how out ofcontrol everything was, and the primal fear of becoming homeless.

Thank you for telling me that. I will try to take heart that you went through it and survived it, and that there's a way back.

 

[Blobby's Murder Knife]

By "baggage" I'm assuming you mean from previous relationships? I don't have that problem, but for men it's like job-hunting. You have to have experience to get experience, and nobody wants a guy without experience.

Baggage can be far more than about that. Just shit that happens in life in general. Doesn't have to be anything related to a relationship at all.

Dunno how old you are so don't know exactly what you mean by that. I am early 40s, so I would think it odd if a man my age had had few to none serious relationships. However, that's what a holistic review is about. Why was that the case? So I just ask him. Sometimes the answers are like...um hmm run...but sometimes they make a lot of sense because life can be fucking retarded and gay sometimes. It just depends on how old you are and the reasons why. I would also be very concerned if a man had...uh...too much experience too.

If I was back in my 20s, I struggle to think about caring about that kind of thing too much. It definitely didn't make the top 10 things.

 

[Betonhaus]

I can't wait for next year. I'm just so broke and tired. I'll get a payment on the 1rst and my leg will be more healed so I can look for work.

 

[Mysterious Figure]

I can't wait for next year. I'm just so broke and tired. I'll get a payment on the 1rst and my leg will be more healed so I can look for work.

I quit an abusive, overworked job to get a better paying one with normal hours. The new job is taking forever to start and it's been stressful. I hope the new year is better for me.

 

[dick brain]

And fuck no I am not looking for muscled rich gigachad retards.

Aw man I'm gonna be alone forever at this rate.

 

[Archeops]

Mildly annoyed but not by much, I had to deal with migraine aura last night (after hunting for Christmas presents in the pouring rain) and now I’m just dealing with aftereffects of me having the autistic urge to rub my eyes after it wears off and some mild photosensitivity.

As to how often it happens to me it‘s fairly infrequent, the last time I remember having it was 6-8 months ago (and even that number may be off, it’s that infrequent) and there have been years where I’ve gone without having it. Either way I’m going to schedule an appointment with my doctor to check it out in addition to other things that have been bothering me.

 

[Flavius Claudius Julianus]

Getting married soon. Despite trying to keep costs down and hating everyone who spends a lot on their wedding/getting married, it's wild how all this shit adds up. We're cutting out a LOT of the normal bullshit, and it's still gonna be several thousand more than I initially thought.

I'm a retard who spends a LOT on himself throughout the year though, so I can't complain too hard.

 

[Ewan McGregor]

Getting married soon. Despite trying to keep costs down and hating everyone who spends a lot on their wedding/getting married, it's wild how all this shit adds up. We're cutting out a LOT of the normal bullshit, and it's still gonna be several thousand more than I initially thought.

I'm a retard who spends a LOT on himself throughout the year though, so I can't complain too hard.

Apparently when you get married you learn that there is no conceivable way of having a modest wedding.

I've seen a few couples in this predicament and it always spirals out of hand.