How is the kiwi above you in bed?

i went blind before we even could get down and dirty, wouldn't take off the deal with it glasses. ended up in the ER, lost eye sight, have to get dead person eyes. FML
 
Some bow wow wow, mostly focused on the OW OW OW.
 
They kept expanding and deflating, which made things a bit distracting. 6/10
 
Massive cock but a bit too massive. Made me breakfast. 7/10
 
Woke up at 4'o'clock in the morning to make chocolate pudding. Don't know why.
 
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Still wanted me to get the haircut of a four year old boy with blonde hair. Needless to say, I told her to idi nachui.
 
With a surname like Fitzroy, I can only assume there's gonna be a lot of drinking and punching involved
 
Scares away hookers when he asks for poop on his chest
 
Too poor to afford a bed or even a home, and too incompetent to get laid so he kidnaps doggies and bones them in the sewer. I don't know how he managed to afford a PC tho.
 
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A potato. 5/10 for the sheer fact the only thing I can do is eat it..while laying in my bed.
 
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