How is the kiwi above you in bed?

[Mister Loser]

Sloppy and painful the entire time, felt something squishy touching my weewee while in the hole.

 

[MistressCaridad]

He just wanted to cyber, and he kept calling me "waifu". Boooooooring.

 

[Deadpool]

Claimed to be a mistress, but was clearly a black man. I was so angry I revoked their poc card. The sex was alright though.

 

[c-no]

Heretical enough for me be dominant.

 

[FierceBrosnan]

A colon pulverizing jack-hammer of a man but also a gentle cuddler.

 

[From The Uncanny Valley]

Melted. I want my money back.

 

[c-no]

Terrible. Couldn't make an angered face like mine when we did the most heretical position: missionary for the purpose of procreation.

 

[ShittyRecolor]

While he was shivering helplessly amidst La petite mort I whispered in his ear: If you meet God, tell him to bring some lube. Surprisingly, he didn't seem to get the reference. Eh, it was still a decent pork, or should I say, a decent poultry? Eh?? EH??

 

[Ntwadumela]

You know what they say about chickenhawks
We really do enjoy preying on chickens a lot
10/10

 

[Cthulu]

You know what they say about chickenhawks
We really do enjoy preying on chickens a lot
10/10

Not worth a fuck. He kept trying to get me in a lion fursuit and only wanted anal

 

[LoneCasshew]

Very useful for re-enacting scenes from my japanese animes, but otherwise any time in bed with him gives me nightmares.

 

[c-no]

0/10. animu grill shit does not go well with an angry priest.

 

[Black Waltz]

painful, I couldn't sit right for a week

 

[Diagonally slanted shelf]

Name was misleading.

 

[Ntwadumela]

Dude gave me a psychic handjob with no hands involved.
Dayuuuuuuuuuuuuum

 

[Meat_Puppet]

It's now going on a week and I have been chained up in this dark ravishing princes sex chamber. The sex is great and all but I really do have to go home at some point. 10/10

 

[Woodcutting bot]

The best puppet on puppet action imaginable

 

[Antipathy]

Crap, I wasn't supposed to autopsy that one? Fuck.

I found a disconcerting amount of steroids in the body, am currently trying to refine and sell on black market. Estimated profit is ~100k. 2/10

 

[HY 140]

p vanilla tbh 6/10

 

[Ntwadumela]

She was displeased at the fact I didn't have a bowl cut hairstyle, but overlooked it afterwards and had some pleasant sex.
May or may not have involved weed