How to Get a Goth Gf - A practical guide from an expert.

[FierceBrosnan]

not imagining yourself as Scott Pilgrim, and washing your ass.

I feel like these 2 things right here are what keep so many dudes in the relationship desert.

 

[Meriasek]

Fellow based Clown Goth™ enjoyer I see.

I'm surprised scary goth is so low.

The amount of BPD is proportional to the amount of metal in their faces. It's a warning sign that your life will get ruined too fast for enjoyment. And once the eyebrows come off, so do the kids' gloves.
Seriously tho, it's just that the more extreme the fashion is, fewer people will be into it.
I was never into the actual goth subculture and music, but coming from Black and other forms of Extreme Metal, goth is kinda adjacent there.

 

[Autistic Gunspergings]

I dunno man I just wanna shoot guns

 

[The Hardest R]

I had a goth fuck buddy for a little bit. She was a quarter Vietnamese, had huge boobs, was really hot and down for anything. She was really into the goth aesthetic and was a radio host for a show that there’s no way in hell I’m going to mention here. She revealed to me that she took medication so she wouldn’t be able to have nightmares anymore. Then she told me her relationship with her father. Then she’d call me at random times crying. Then she dropped off the face of the earth. Turns out her rich attorney mommy whisked her away to Los Angeles for a couple weeks but she wasn’t allowed to bring her cell phone. Ironically she became even more high strung and I checked out. Don’t get a goth gf, you’re better off without one.

 

[CornBogFitz]

I had a goth fuck buddy for a little bit. She was a quarter Vietnamese, had huge boobs, was really hot and down for anything. She was really into the goth aesthetic and was a radio host for a show that there’s no way in hell I’m going to mention here. She revealed to me that she took medication so she wouldn’t be able to have nightmares anymore. Then she told me her relationship with her father. Then she’d call me at random times crying. Then she dropped off the face of the earth. Turns out her rich attorney mommy whisked her away to Los Angeles for a couple weeks but she wasn’t allowed to bring her cell phone. Ironically she became even more high strung and I checked out. Don’t get a goth gf, you’re better off without one.

Get a goth Gf if you feel like you missed out on teen love. once you get one you will realize why teen love was overrated and not at all how it’s portrayed in your gay little anime

 

[DSHK]

Even if this was serious aren't goths basically dead as a subculture for the last 20-30 years? Especially for chicks who are much less likely to to be into niche things than guys? All you'll have to pick from are mostly middle aged women in their 40-50s

Goth here, 90s industrial saved us from going extinct like the emos

 

[CornBogFitz]

Goth here, 90s industrial saved us from going extinct like the emos

Emos are coming back. All the emo kids are now grown up and realizing their parents can’t tell them how to dress anymore.

 

[BootlegPopeye]

Every ex-girlfriend of mine was goth from when I was 17 until I was like 30. As I was goth also that makes it easier, but the scene is absolutely dead now, mainly on the account of the interest in the music declined sharply after about 2005. Any attempt to really revive it now would flop because it would immediately get filled up with trannies.

There was a lot more creativity in the look because it was not so heavily commercialized yeah you had things like Hot topic come up eventually but that was mostly just shit like band tees.

In general, after the early to mid-2000s, they're really weren't decades of different fashion anymore. We could talk about fashion of the 60s 70s 80s 90s and somewhat of the aughts but after that people are pretty fucking boring. So now the goth scene, such as it is, is nothing but LARPing fat disgusting trannies.

 

[CornBogFitz]

Every ex-girlfriend of mine was goth from when I was 17 until I was like 30. As I was goth also that makes it easier, but the scene is absolutely dead now, mainly on the account of the interest in the music declined sharply after about 2005. Any attempt to really revive it now would flop because it would immediately get filled up with trannies.

There was a lot more creativity in the look because it was not so heavily commercialized yeah you had things like Hot topic come up eventually but that was mostly just shit like band tees.

In general, after the early to mid-2000s, they're really weren't decades of different fashion anymore. We could talk about fashion of the 60s 70s 80s 90s and somewhat of the aughts but after that people are pretty fucking boring. So now the goth scene, such as it is, is nothing but LARPing fat disgusting trannies.

“Erm actually goths these days aren’t REAL goths”

 

[BootlegPopeye]

“Erm actually goths these days aren’t REAL goths”

I don't give a fuck I'm too old for that shit now. But trannies are unable to even fake it enough to even call whatever that is a scene.

 

[DSHK]

Emos are coming back. All the emo kids are now grown up and realizing their parents can’t tell them how to dress anymore.

I know, its the rawring 20s. I have a second chance to get an emo gf now and ive already lost 10 pounds in service of that goal.

 

[CornBogFitz]

I don't give a fuck I'm too old for that shit now. But trannies are unable to even fake it enough to even call whatever that is a scene.

Yeah I’ve had some guys afraid to go to the goth club being like “what if it’s a dude” I’m like bro. The idea of a tranny passing is total fiction. There is nothing more apparent than if it’s a dude. Ur right in how they’ve infected the place. Just ignore them. They’re usually too autistic to do anything but lurk in the corners anyway.

 

[CornBogFitz]

I know, its the rawring 20s. I have a second chance to get an emo gf now and ive already lost 10 pounds in service of that goal.

What you want to look for is this traveling American tour called “emo nite” spelled that way to N-I-T-E if ur a major American city they come like once a month. And it’s AMAZING. Only like $30 a ticket too

 

[KingNothing]

I've been wearing the Carl McCoy spaghetti western gear dusted with flour. No luck so far.

 

[DSHK]

What you want to look for is this traveling American tour called “emo nite” spelled that way to N-I-T-E if ur a major American city they come like once a month. And it’s AMAZING. Only like $30 a ticket too

Im a goth and I HATE emo music but fuck it. I wanna fuck an emo chick while I still can.

Yeah I’ve had some guys afraid to go to the goth club being like “what if it’s a dude” I’m like bro. The idea of a tranny passing is total fiction. There is nothing more apparent than if it’s a dude. Ur right in how they’ve infected the place. Just ignore them. They’re usually too autistic to do anything but lurk in the corners anyway.

As a goth I can confirm, troons have infested the scene. And yes, they absolutely do not pass.

 

[Trigger Me Timbers]

OP lists all different types of Goth. Doesn’t provide pictures.

Son I am disappoint.

 

[DSHK]

Update: 25 pounds down, 42 more to go