Imagine A Book Filled with Your Internet Posts - Yes, ALL of them

@Mauvwomyn Shuffleboard drew this for me before, it's definitely what I'd look like with my internet book and also give you a pretty good idea of the contents therein.

https://kiwifarms.net/proxy.php?image=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FwdBsjMP.png&hash=f06bcd500370dfbefe8eec7a0ab31120

Artist comment: " 'How to Lose Friends and Alienate People.' I was going to write that on the book you were holding but it wouldn't fit."
 
It would be the best catalogue of personal quotes since the Little Red Book.
 
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Jesus Christ how horrifying.
I feel like I could handle having my own personal copy of the book. Then I could at least read through the first couple chapters, cringe, and toss it in the attic.
 
Would this include posts from accounts you've deleted?

Thankfully I normally purge all my internet stuff every few months because I get bored which saves me a lot of cringing later on. But dear god if my old tumblr accounts resurfaced. Edge so sharp picking up the book would result in an instant paper-cut. If only past me had sliced her fingers off on it to stop her from posting all that shit.
 
My posts wouldn't be embarassing at all with the exception of my elementary school-high school posts which would be cringy.
 
Would this include posts from accounts you've deleted?

Thankfully I normally purge all my internet stuff every few months because I get bored which saves me a lot of cringing later on. But dear god if my old tumblr accounts resurfaced. Edge so sharp picking up the book would result in an instant paper-cut. If only past me had sliced her fingers off on it to stop her from posting all that shit.


ALL OF YOUR POSTS. (All of them)
 
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I'm glad I use new handles on every site, and always have. No one will ever be able to tie me back to my numerous, embarrassing teenaged Live Journals. I'm really hoping the Russians stop using it soon, so the site will just be closed down.
 
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It would be the greatest novel ever written and I'd get invited to be on Oprah and then I'd fuck Oprah right in her pussy on live television and nobody would really mind all that much because my novel was so great.
Oprah's entire career is fueled on real life shitposts and overcoming being a shitposter so this isn't that unrealistic.
 
It would be the greatest novel ever written and I'd get invited to be on Oprah and then I'd fuck Oprah right in her pussy on live television and nobody would really mind all that much because my novel was so great.

And then everyone in the audience would get a copy.
 
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