ITT: Copy & Paste a Movie Synopsis from wikipedia and replace the characters with Kiwi Farms Users - Let's put ourselves in the movies

In 1973, 10-year-old @vertexwindi practices basketball late into the night, and tells his father about his ambitions to go to the University of North Carolina, play on a championship team, and join the NBA. Over the next twenty years, @vertexwindi excels in high school, college, Olympic (twice), and professional basketball, and goes on to become one of the greatest NBA players of all time. In 1993, @vertexwindi announces his retirement from professional basketball to follow his late father's career in baseball. Facing much less success, he is assigned a publicist/assistant, the bumbling @Alan Pardew, to smooth the transition.

Elsewhere in outer space, the intergalactic amusement park Moron Mountain is in decline; its owner @FuckYou sends his diminutive minions, the Nerdlucks, to capture the Looney Tunes as new entertainment. They divebomb to the center of the earth, where the Looney Tunes' reality is hidden. Despite having powerful laser guns, the Nerdlucks are tricked into thinking that their prisoners have a chance to defend themselves; @Looney Troons states that the challenge to decide their fates will be basketball (as the Nerdlucks are too small to play). But @Looney Troons make the mistake of showing an educational film about it that states "the best in the world" play. The Nerdlucks steal the talents of @Super Collie, @Jeb-sama, @ObeseScreamingBlackMan, @LofaSofa, and @UnKillFill. The sudden incapacity of the five NBA players leads to worldwide panic that results in the NBA season ending early. The five players try fruitlessly to restore their skills, through practice, hospitalization, therapy, prayer, to no avail. To intimidate the Looney Tunes, the Nerdlucks absorb the talent in front of them, transforming into froms twice as large as them with dark basketball uniforms. @NARPASSWORD dubs them "Monstars" - monster stars. @Looney Troons realizes that they're going to need professional help.

While golfing with @Kiwi Jeff, @PsychoNerd054 and @Alan Pardew, @vertexwindi is sucked down a hole by @Steamboat_Bill's lasso and into Looney Tunes' land. Everyone is happy to meet him, despite @vertexwindi dismissing it as a dream. @Looney Troons uses his usual comedy to make @vertexwindi realize he's awake; he then explains the Tunes' dire situation to him. @vertexwindi agrees to train them, as he no longer plays basketball. However, right before he can start teaching them, the Monstars break into the gym to intimidate the Tunes further; when @vertexwindi attempts to stand up to them, the Monstars use their talent and cartoon physics to turn @vertexwindi into a ball and humiliate him. Deciding to play against the Monstars personally, @vertexwindi sends @Looney Troons and @Jaiman to retrieve his basketball gear from home. @Alan Pardew spots @Looney Troons and @Jaiman and pursues them to the Tunes' world, reuniting with @vertexwindi and joining their team, the Tune Squad. Another new recruit is @Reynard, a skilled player with whom @Looney Troons is instantly smitten.

On the day of the match, the Monstars dominate the first half, sinking the Looney Tunes’ morale. @Alan Pardew overhears the Monstars tell @FuckYou how they gained their talent, and informs the Tune Squad. @Looney Troons and @vertexwindi rally the team and power through the third quarter with old school gags and Acme weaponry. During a timeout, @vertexwindi raises the stakes with @FuckYou: a win by the Tune Squad would require the Monstars return their stolen talents, while a win by the Monstars would earn them @vertexwindi as a new attraction. To ensure victory, @FuckYou orders the Monstars to play rough, injuring the Tune Squad until only @vertexwindi, @Looney Troons, @Jaiman, @Reynard and @Alan Pardew remain. @Alan Pardew manages to score but is literally flattened by the Monstars and removed from the court. However, the referee, @AnOminous, informs @vertexwindi that without a fifth player, the Tune Squad will have to forfeit. @Kiwi Jeff arrives and volunteers, much to @Jaiman's confusion; @Kiwi Jeff explains that he asked his agent to get him there. In the final seconds of the game, @vertexwindi gains the ball, but is grabbed by the Monstars during a jump to the basket. Remembering @Looney Troons told him that cartoon physics apply to him, he extends his arm and scores the winning points.

Seeing the Monstars get yelled at by @FuckYou, @vertexwindi helps them realize they only listened to him because they were smaller. With the Tunes watching with satisfactory smiles, @FuckYou is encased in a rocket by the Monstars and sent back to his amusement park. Giving up their stolen talent, the reformed Nerdlucks are recruited into the Looney Tunes ensemble, and drop off @vertexwindi and a recovered @Alan Pardew at @vertexwindi's next baseball game. @vertexwindi and @Alan Pardew visit the incapacitated basketball players and return their talent. The players provoke a reluctant @vertexwindi into a three-on-three match. The film ends with @vertexwindi's 1995 return to the Chicago Bulls to resume his basketball career.
 
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A feast is held in TSIC in honor of King @Alan Pardew ’s royal visit. @Tetraphobia decides he is thankful his bastardy has relegated him to the far end of the hall with the younger squires instead of the king's family. Here he can drink as much as he wants (he has a man’s thirst) and mingle freely with those around him.

@Tetraphobia watches the king and his family as they arrive. He recognizes Queen @trombonista ’s false smile and is disappointed with fat, red-faced King @Alan Pardew. The 8-year-old Princess @Vrakks seems smitten with her escort @atm, leading @Tetraphobia to decide she is insipid. @cumrobbery is escorted by plump, young Princess @ICameToplaY. The 12-year-old Crown Prince @ICametoLurk (who is even taller than @atm) is escorting the radiant @Pina Colada. @Tetraphobia decides he does not like @ICametoLurk ’s pouty lips or the disdain the prince seems to hold for TSIC. He also notes that the queen's brother @Meowthkip looks like a proper king, and that @Feline Darkmage is grotesquely fascinating, as ugly as @Meowthkip and @trombonista are beautiful. The last to enter are @LofaSofa and @chekovia.

@Tetraphobia feeds his direwolf Ghost under the table and watches the pup silently face down a full-grown dog three times his size. Bringing his wolf to the feast is another perk to being the bastard. @Tetraphobia is soon joined by his uncle @LofaSofa, who asks @Tetraphobia how much he's had to drink, adding that @Tetraphobia is older than he was when he first got truly drunk. @LofaSofa asks about Ghost and @Tetraphobia explains that he named him Ghost for his white color and because he never makes a sound. @LofaSofa then asks why @Tetraphobia is not at the main table and @Tetraphobia says flatly that Lady @Somari1996 thought seating a bastard with the king might give offense.

@LofaSofa comments that @Syaoran Li does not seem festive and @Tetraphobia adds that neither does the queen, probably because of King @Alan Pardew ’s visit to the crypts. @LofaSofa commends @Tetraphobia's keen observation and remarks that he could use a man like him on the Wall. @Tetraphobia asks if he can return to the Wall with @LofaSofa. @LofaSofa replies that the Wall is a hard place for a boy, but @Tetraphobia counters that he will turn 15 on his next name day and it's said bastards grow up faster than purebloods. @Tetraphobia thinks about how all his half brothers and sisters have futures, but there is no future for a bastard. @LofaSofa says that he should know a woman and father a bastard or two first, to know what he will be giving up. This angers @Tetraphobia, who states that he will never father a bastard and runs off with Ghost at his heels before anyone can see him cry.

As @Tetraphobia is leaving, @Feline Darkmage speaks to him from a ledge in the deserted yard and asks if he can take a look at Ghost. @Tetraphobia offers to help him down, but @Feline Darkmage jumps down, acrobatically landing on his hands and vaulting to his feet. Ghost is uncertain about @Feline Darkmage, but submits to examination at @Tetraphobia's command. @Feline Darkmage asks if @Tetraphobia is @Syaoran Li’s bastard. @Tetraphobia bridles and @Feline Darkmage apologizes that as a dwarf he can usually speak as he pleases, like a jester. He comments that @Tetraphobia seems to have more of the North in him than his half-siblings. @Feline Darkmage advises @Tetraphobia never to forget who and what he is so that no one can use it against him. When @Tetraphobia questions what @Feline Darkmage would know about being a bastard, @Feline Darkmage replies that all futas are bastards in their father’s eyes and that, although all futas are bastards, not all bastards need to be futas.
 
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@Somari1996, who has inherited the defense contractor Kinomoto Industries from his father, is in war-torn Afghanistan with his friend and military liaison Lieutenant Colonel @Syaoran Li to demonstrate the new "Jericho" missile. After the demonstration, the convoy is ambushed and @Somari1996 is critically wounded by a rocket-propelled grenade used by the attackers: one of his company's own. He is captured and imprisoned in a cave by a terrorist group, the Ten Rings; @jandek, a fellow captive who is a doctor, implants an electromagnet into @Somari1996's chest to keep the shrapnel shards that wounded him from reaching his heart and killing him. Ten Rings leader @Ron /pol/ offers @Somari1996 freedom in exchange for building a Jericho missile for the group, but @Somari1996 and @jandek know that @Ron /pol/ will not keep his word.

@Somari1996 and @jandek secretly build a small, powerful electric generator called an arc reactor to power @Somari1996's electromagnet and a prototypical suit of powered armor to aid in their escape. Although they keep the suit hidden almost to completion, the Ten Rings discover their hostages' intentions and attack the workshop. @jandek sacrifices himself to divert them while the suit is completed. The armored @Somari1996 battles his way out of the cave to find the dying @jandek, then burns the Ten Rings' weapons in anger and flies away, crashing in the desert and destroying the suit. After being rescued by @Syaoran Li, @Somari1996 returns home and announces that his company will no longer manufacture weapons. @Somari, his father's old partner and the company's manager, advises @Somari1996 that this may ruin Industries and his father's legacy. In his home workshop, @Somari1996 builds a sleeker, more powerful version of his improvised armor suit as well as a more powerful arc reactor for his chest. Personal assistant @tomoyo places the original reactor inside a small glass showcase. Though @Somari requests details, a suspicious @Somari1996 keeps his work to himself.

At a charity event held by Kinomoto Industries, reporter @ICameToplaY informs @Somari1996 that his company's weapons were recently delivered to the Ten Rings and are being used to attack @jandek's home village, Gulmira. @Somari1996 then learns that @Somari has been arms trafficking to criminals worldwide and is staging a coup to replace him as Kinomoto Industries' CEO. @Somari1996 dons his new armor and flies to Afghanistan, where he saves the villagers. While flying home, @Somari1996 is shot at by two F-22 Raptor fighter jets. He reveals his secret identity to @Syaoran Li over the phone in an attempt to end the attack. Meanwhile, the Ten Rings gather the pieces of @Somari1996's prototype suit and meet with @Somari, who subdues @Ron /pol/ and has the rest of the group killed. @Somari has a massive new suit reverse engineered from the wreckage. Seeking to track his company's illegal shipments, @Somari1996 sends @tomoyo to hack into its database. She discovers that @Somari hired the Ten Rings to kill @Somari1996, but the group reneged. @tomoyo meets with Agent @Dynastia of @D.E.S.E.R.T., an intelligence agency, to inform him of @Somari's activities.

@Somari's scientists cannot duplicate @Somari1996's miniaturized arc reactor, so @Somari ambushes @Somari1996 at his home and takes the one from his chest. @Somari1996 manages to get to his original reactor to replace it. @tomoyo and several @D.E.S.E.R.T. agents attempt to arrest @Somari, but he dons his suit and attacks them. @Somari1996 fights @Somari, but is outmatched without his new reactor to run his suit at full capacity. The fight carries @Somari1996 and @Somari to the top of the Kinomoto Industries building, and @Somari1996 instructs @tomoyo to overload the large arc reactor powering the building. This unleashes a massive electrical surge that causes @Somari and his armor to fall into the exploding reactor, killing him. The next day, at a press conference, @Somari1996 defies suggestions from @D.E.S.E.R.T. and publicly admits to being "Iron Man."

In a post-credits scene, @D.E.S.E.R.T. Director @Alan Pardew visits @Somari1996 at home, telling him that Iron Man is not "the only superhero in the world", and explaining that he wants to discuss the "Vroomer Initiative"
 
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Narrated by himself throughout the film, @Count groudon is the selfish and egotistical emperor of the Inca kingdom who routinely punishes anyone who disappoints him or "throws off his groove". @Count groudon meets up with @AnOminous, a kind peasant and village leader, and tells him that he plans to demolish @AnOminous hilltop family home to build himself a lavish summer resort called "Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens", leaving @AnOminous despondent. When @Count groudon later fires his conniving adviser @CatParty, she, along with her dim-witted henchman @bearycool, plots to take the throne. The pair attempt to poison the emperor at dinner, but due to a mix up with the labels on @CatParty's vials, they inadvertently give him a potion that transforms him into a llama. When the two knock @Count groudon unconscious and stuff him in a sack, @CatParty orders @bearycool to dispose of him. @bearycool at the last moment changes his mind and saves him, but misplaces the sack on a cart belonging to @AnOminous.

@AnOminous returns home, unaware of the unconscious llama on his cart. When he wakes, @Count groudon blames @AnOminous for his transformation and orders him to return him to the capital. @AnOminous offers to do so only if @Count groudon changes his mind about Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens, to which @Count groudon at first refuses. However, after running afoul of the local wildlife, he accepts @AnOminous's offer, secretly planning to go back on his word once he is safe. The two survive many ordeals in the jungle, and @AnOminous finds @Count groudon has a kinder side to him underneath his ego, and believes he will remain true to his word. Meanwhile, @CatParty has taken the throne, but soon learns that @bearycool failed to kill @Count groudon. The two set out to find @Count groudon.

Both pairs arrive at a jungle diner at the same time (despite a sign saying "No Llamas Allowed"). @AnOminous overhears @CatParty's plan to kill him, and tries to warn @Count groudon, but @Count groudon does not believe him, and announces that he still plans to destroy @AnOminous' village, leading to a falling out between the two. However, @Count groudon soon overhears more of @CatParty and @bearycool's scheming. Realizing no one in his kingdom misses him because of his selfishness, @Count groudon leaves the diner on his own, planning on living out his days as a llama. @AnOminous catches up, still willing to help @Count groudon return to normal. @Count groudon apologizes for his selfishness and they set off for @AnOminous' house to resupply.

When they arrive, @CatParty is already there. @AnOminous has his family stall @CatParty, giving him and @Count groudon a head start back to the capital. They head to @CatParty's laboratory and find numerous transformation potions, including the antidote, but @CatParty and @bearycool have somehow arrived first. @CatParty orders @bearycool to kill the pair, but @bearycool cannot bring himself to do so, and ends up switching sides. After dropping him down a trap door, @CatParty orders her guards to capture the pair under the pretense that they killed the emperor. @AnOminous grabs a handful of vials, while he and @Count groudon flee, trying the various vials during their flight to find the right one. As they are cornered on the ledges of a giant wall structure, they find they are down to two vials. During a scuffle, @CatParty falls onto one of the vials and is transformed into a "helpless" cat. After some hi-jinx, @Count groudon and @AnOminous recover the other vial to which @Count groudon drinks it.

Now human again and a more selfless ruler, @Count groudon takes @AnOminous' suggestion of moving Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens over to a neighbouring, unoccupied hill next to @AnOminous' village. Some time later, @Count groudon joins @AnOminous and his family at his modest resort, sharing his swimming pool with them, while elsewhere @bearycool has become a scout leader and trains a new batch of scouts, including the reluctant @CatParty, who remains a kitten.
 
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In 1985 Hill Valley, California, teenager @FierceBrosnan and his girlfriend, @ATaxingWoman, are chastised by the school principal for lateness. @FierceBrosnan auditions for the Battle of the Bands, but is rejected for being too loud. At home, Marty's father @J A N D E K is bullied by his supervisor, @Sword Fighter Super , while his mother @ICameToplaY is an overweight, depressed alcoholic. @ICameToplaY recalls how she met @J A N D E K when her father hit him with his car.
@FierceBrosnan is invited by his friend, eccentric inventor @Trilby , to meet him in a parking lot in the early hours. @Trilby unveils a time machine built from a modified DeLorean and powered by plutonium stolen from terrorists. Preparing to demonstrate the time machine, @Trilby sets the date to November 5, 1955: the day he conceived a time travel device. The terrorists arrive and shoot @Trilby. @FierceBrosnan escapes in the DeLorean, but inadvertently activates the time machine.
@FierceBrosnan finds himself in 1955 without enough plutonium to return. He encounters the teenaged @J A N D E K , who is bullied by his classmate @Sword Fighter Super. After @FierceBrosnan saves @J A N D E K from an oncoming car, he is knocked unconscious and awakens to find himself tended to by @ICameToplaY, who is infatuated with him.
@FierceBrosnan tracks down @Trilby's younger self for help. With no plutonium, @Trilby explains that the only power source capable of generating the necessary 1.21 gigawatts (1,620,000 hp) of electricity for the time machine is a bolt of lightning. @FierceBrosnan shows @Trilby a flyer from the future that recounts a lightning strike at the town's courthouse due the coming Saturday night. @Trilby instructs @FierceBrosnan to not leave his house or interact with anyone, as he could inadvertently alter the future; because of this, @Trilby refuses to heed warnings from @FierceBrosnan about his death in 1985. When they realize that he has prevented his parents from meeting, @Trilby warns @FierceBrosnan that he must find a way to introduce @J A N D E K to @ICameToplaY or he will be erased from existence. @Trilby formulates a plan to harness the power of the lightning, while @FierceBrosnan sets about introducing his parents, but he antagonizes @Sword Fighter Super and his gang in the process.
After @ICameToplaY asks @FierceBrosnan to the school dance, @FierceBrosnan concocts a plan: he will feign inappropriate advances on @ICameToplaY, allowing @J A N D E K to "rescue" her. The plan goes awry when a drunken @Sword Fighter Super attempts to force himself on @ICameToplaY. @J A N D E K , enraged, knocks out @Sword Fighter Super, and @ICameToplaY accompanies him to the dance floor, where they kiss while @FierceBrosnan performs with the band.
As the storm arrives, @FierceBrosnan returns to the clock tower and the lightning strikes, sending @FierceBrosnan back to 1985. @Trilby has survived the shooting, as he had listened to @FierceBrosnan's warnings and worn a bullet-proof vest. @Trilby takes @FierceBrosnan home and departs to the future. @FierceBrosnan awakens the next morning to find that @J A N D E K is a successful author, @ICameToplaY is fit and happy, and @Sword Fighter Super is now an obsequious auto valet. As @FierceBrosnan reunites with @ATaxingWoman, the DeLorean appears with @Trilby, insisting they accompany him to 2015 to resolve a problem with their future children. The trio board the DeLorean, which has been upgraded with hover technology, and warp to the future.

2.

@Tard Baby and @Ron /pol/, two kindly but dimwitted men, are best friends and roommates living in Providence, Rhode Island. @Tard Baby, a chip-toothed limousine driver, immediately falls in love when he meets @Cosmos, a woman he is driving to the airport. She leaves a briefcase in the terminal. @Tard Baby, unaware that it contains ransom money for her kidnapped husband, @dysentery, and that she was supposed to leave it there for the kidnappers to pick up, retrieves the briefcase and tries to return it to her before the kidnappers can get it. However, Mary's Aspen-bound plane has already departed, which @Tard Baby finds out the hard way as he runs through and falls out of the jetway.
Fired from his job, @Tard Baby returns to his apartment and learns that @Ron /pol/ has also been fired from his dog-grooming job after delivering dogs late to a show and accidentally getting them dirty. @dysentery's kidnappers, @AnOminous and @Reynard, follow @Tard Baby home from the airport in pursuit of the briefcase. Mistaking the crooks for debt collectors, the duo flee the apartment and return later to find that @AnOminous has decapitated @Ron /pol/ s parakeet. @Tard Baby suggests they head to Aspen to find @Cosmos and return the briefcase, hoping she can "plug them into the social pipeline." Initially, @Ron /pol/ opposes the idea, but he eventually agrees and the duo leaves the next day.
@AnOminous and @Reynard catch up to the duo at a motel that night. Posing as a hitchhiker, @AnOminous is picked up by @Tard Baby and @Ron /pol/ while @Reynard secretly follows them. During a lunch stop, the duo prank @AnOminous with chili peppers in his burger, not knowing of his ulcer. When @AnOminous reacts adversely, they accidentally kill him with some rat poison pills (which @AnOminous had planned to use on them), mistaking them for his medication. Nearing Colorado, @Tard Baby takes a wrong turn and ends up driving all night through Nebraska, while the police waiting on the road to Colorado expect them to show up after finding out about @AnOminous's death. Upon waking up and realizing @Tard Baby's mishap, @Ron /pol/ gives up on the journey and decides to walk home, but @Tard Baby later persuades him to continue after trading the van for a minibike.
The two arrive in Aspen, but are unable to locate @Cosmos in the yellow pages, as @Tard Baby recalls her surname incorrectly. After a short scuffle over some gloves that night, the briefcase breaks open and they discover the money; they spend it for a hotel suite, clothes and a Lamborghini Diablo. They learn that @Cosmos and her family are hosting a gala and prepare to attend. At the gala, @Ron /pol/ , attempting to lure @Cosmos over to @Tard Baby, reluctantly agrees to go skiing with her the next day and lies to @Tard Baby that he got him a date. The next day, @Tard Baby finds out @Ron /pol/ lied to him after waiting all day for @Cosmos at the hotel bar.
In retaliation, @Tard Baby pranks @Ron /pol/ by serving him a coffee laced with laxative, causing @Ron /pol/ to spontaneously defecate in a broken toilet at @Cosmo's house. @Tard Baby arrives at @Cosmo's house and informs her that he has her briefcase; he takes her to the hotel, shows her the briefcase, and confesses his love after some initial struggle, but she unsurprisingly rejects him because she is already married. Suddenly, @Kiwi Jeff, an old friend of the @Cosmo's and the mastermind behind @dysentery's kidnapping, arrives with @Reynard and, upon learning that @Tard Baby and @Ron /pol/ had spent all of the ransom money and replaced it with IOUs, takes @Tard Baby and @Cosmos hostage, as well as @Ron /pol/ when he returns. An argument between @Ron /pol/ and @Tard Baby leads @Kiwi Jeff to shoot @Ron /pol/ . Before @Kiwi Jeff can kill them, an FBI team led by @Dink Smallwood , whom @Ron /pol/ met earlier at a gas station, raids the suite and arrests him and @Reynard. @Ron /pol/ is revealed to be alive thanks to a bulletproof vest that was strapped on him earlier, and @Cosmos and @dysentery are reunited. @Tard Baby, envious that he cannot be with @Cosmos because she is married, fantasizes about shooting @dysentery dead, but grows friendly towards him.
The next day, @Tard Baby and @Ron /pol/ begin walking home. All of the items they bought were confiscated and their minibike has broken down. The two unknowingly decline the chance to be oil boys for a group of bikini girls, after which @Ron /pol/ tells @Tard Baby that they will get their "break" one day. @Tard Baby and @Ron /pol/ then play a friendly game of tag as they walk back home.
 
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TFW nobody wants to put you in their wikipedia movie copypasta madlibs :heart-empty:
 
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At Culver University in Virginia, General Thunderbolt @Sword Fighter Super meets with Dr. Baby, the colleague and boyfriend of his daughter @Reynard, regarding an experiment that @Sword Fighter Super claims is meant to make humans immune to gamma radiation. The experiment—part of a World War II-era "super soldier" program that @Sword Fighter Super hopes to recreate—fails, and the exposure to gamma radiation causes Baby to transform into the @Tard Baby for brief periods of time, whenever his heart rate rises above 200 beats per minute. The @Tard Baby destroys the lab and surrounding area, killing several people inside, and injuring the General and @Reynard, along with others outside. Baby becomes a fugitive from the U.S. military and @Sword Fighter Super in particular, who wants to weaponize the @Tard Baby.



Five years later, Baby works at a bottling factory in Rocinha, Rio de Janeiro in Brazil, while searching for a cure for his condition. On the internet, he collaborates with a colleague he knows only as "Mr. Blue", and to whom he is "Mr. Green". He is learning Yoga techniques to help keep control, and has not transformed in five months. After Baby cuts his finger, a drop of his blood falls into a bottle, and is eventually ingested by an elderly consumer in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, giving him gamma sickness. Using the bottle to track down Baby, @Sword Fighter Super sends a special forces team, led by Russian-born British Royal Marine @BubbleButt, to capture him. Baby transforms into the @Tard Baby and defeats @BubbleButt's team. After @Sword Fighter Super explains how Baby became the @Tard Baby, @BubbleButt agrees to be injected with a small amount of a similar serum, which gives him enhanced speed, strength, agility, and healing, but also begins to deform his skeleton and impair his judgment.



Baby returns to Culver University and reunites with @Reynard, who is dating psychiatrist @2odastream. Baby is attacked a second time by @Sword Fighter Super and @BubbleButt's forces, tipped off by the suspicious @2odastream, causing him to again transform into the @Tard Baby. The ensuing battle outside the university proves futile for @Sword Fighter Super' forces and they retreat, though @BubbleButt, whose sanity is faltering, attacks and mocks the @Tard Baby. The @Tard Baby seemingly kills @BubbleButt and flees with @Reynard. After the @Tard Baby reverts to Baby, he and @Reynard go on the run, and Baby contacts Mr. Blue, who urges them to meet him in New York City. Mr. Blue is actually cellular biologist Dr. @TrippinKahlua, who tells Baby he has developed a possible antidote to Baby's condition. After a successful test, he warns Baby that the antidote may only reverse each individual transformation. @TrippinKahlua reveals he has synthesized Baby's blood samples, which Baby sent from Brazil, into a large supply, with the intention of applying its "limitless potential" to medicine. Fearful of the @Tard Baby's power falling into the military's hands, Baby wishes to destroy the blood supply.



@BubbleButt has survived the battle at Culver University and completely healed. He joins @Sword Fighter Super' forces for a third attempt to take Baby into custody. They succeed and Baby, along with @Reynard, are taken away in a helicopter. @BubbleButt stays behind and orders @TrippinKahlua to inject him with Baby's blood, as he covets the @Tard Baby's power. @TrippinKahlua warns that the combination of the super-soldier formula and Baby's blood may cause him to become an "abomination", but @BubbleButt insists. The experiment mutates @BubbleButt into a creature with size and strength surpassing that of the @Tard Baby, but drives him insane. He attacks @TrippinKahlua, who gets some of Baby's blood in a cut on his forehead, causing him to begin mutating as well.



@BubbleButt rampages through Harlem. Realizing that the @Tard Baby is the only one who can stop @BubbleButt, Baby convinces @Sword Fighter Super to release him. He jumps from @Sword Fighter Super' helicopter and transforms after hitting the ground. After a long and brutal battle through Harlem, the @Tard Baby defeats @BubbleButt. After having a peaceful moment with @Reynard, the @Tard Baby flees New York.



A month later, Baby is in Bella Coola, British Columbia. Instead of trying to suppress his transformation, he begins to transform in a controlled manner. @Somari1996 approaches @Sword Fighter Super at a local bar and informs him that a team is being put together.
 
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Somari1996 said:
At Culver University in Virginia, General Thunderbolt @Sword Fighter Super meets with Dr. Baby, the colleague and boyfriend of his daughter @Reynard, regarding an experiment that @Sword Fighter Super claims is meant to make humans immune to gamma radiation. The experiment—part of a World War II-era "super soldier" program that @Sword Fighter Super hopes to recreate—fails, and the exposure to gamma radiation causes Baby to transform into the @Tard Baby for brief periods of time, whenever his heart rate rises above 200 beats per minute. The @Tard Baby destroys the lab and surrounding area, killing several people inside, and injuring the General and @Reynard, along with others outside. Baby becomes a fugitive from the U.S. military and @Sword Fighter Super in particular, who wants to weaponize the @Tard Baby.



Five years later, Baby works at a bottling factory in Rocinha, Rio de Janeiro in Brazil, while searching for a cure for his condition. On the internet, he collaborates with a colleague he knows only as "Mr. Blue", and to whom he is "Mr. Green". He is learning Yoga techniques to help keep control, and has not transformed in five months. After Baby cuts his finger, a drop of his blood falls into a bottle, and is eventually ingested by an elderly consumer in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, giving him gamma sickness. Using the bottle to track down Baby, @Sword Fighter Super sends a special forces team, led by Russian-born British Royal Marine @BubbleButt, to capture him. Baby transforms into the @Tard Baby and defeats @BubbleButt's team. After @Sword Fighter Super explains how Baby became the @Tard Baby, @BubbleButt agrees to be injected with a small amount of a similar serum, which gives him enhanced speed, strength, agility, and healing, but also begins to deform his skeleton and impair his judgment.



Baby returns to Culver University and reunites with @Reynard, who is dating psychiatrist @2odastream. Baby is attacked a second time by @Sword Fighter Super and @BubbleButt's forces, tipped off by the suspicious @2odastream, causing him to again transform into the @Tard Baby. The ensuing battle outside the university proves futile for @Sword Fighter Super' forces and they retreat, though @BubbleButt, whose sanity is faltering, attacks and mocks the @Tard Baby. The @Tard Baby seemingly kills @BubbleButt and flees with @Reynard. After the @Tard Baby reverts to Baby, he and @Reynard go on the run, and Baby contacts Mr. Blue, who urges them to meet him in New York City. Mr. Blue is actually cellular biologist Dr. @TrippinKahlua, who tells Baby he has developed a possible antidote to Baby's condition. After a successful test, he warns Baby that the antidote may only reverse each individual transformation. @TrippinKahlua reveals he has synthesized Baby's blood samples, which Baby sent from Brazil, into a large supply, with the intention of applying its "limitless potential" to medicine. Fearful of the @Tard Baby's power falling into the military's hands, Baby wishes to destroy the blood supply.



@BubbleButt has survived the battle at Culver University and completely healed. He joins @Sword Fighter Super' forces for a third attempt to take Baby into custody. They succeed and Baby, along with @Reynard, are taken away in a helicopter. @BubbleButt stays behind and orders @TrippinKahlua to inject him with Baby's blood, as he covets the @Tard Baby's power. @TrippinKahlua warns that the combination of the super-soldier formula and Baby's blood may cause him to become an "abomination", but @BubbleButt insists. The experiment mutates @BubbleButt into a creature with size and strength surpassing that of the @Tard Baby, but drives him insane. He attacks @TrippinKahlua, who gets some of Baby's blood in a cut on his forehead, causing him to begin mutating as well.



@BubbleButt rampages through Harlem. Realizing that the @Tard Baby is the only one who can stop @BubbleButt, Baby convinces @Sword Fighter Super to release him. He jumps from @Sword Fighter Super' helicopter and transforms after hitting the ground. After a long and brutal battle through Harlem, the @Tard Baby defeats @BubbleButt. After having a peaceful moment with @Reynard, the @Tard Baby flees New York.



A month later, Baby is in Bella Coola, British Columbia. Instead of trying to suppress his transformation, he begins to transform in a controlled manner. @Somari1996 approaches @Sword Fighter Super at a local bar and informs him that a team is being put together.
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I would love to weaponize @Tard Baby.
 
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Kari Kamiya said:
A group of children are playing hide-and-seek in the courtyard of an apartment building somewhere in America using a chant about a predator of children. A woman sets the table for dinner, waiting for her daughter to come home from school. A wanted poster warns of a pedophile preying on children, as anxious parents wait outside a school.

Little Elsie Beckmann leaves school, bouncing a ball on her way home. She is approached by @Roasted, who is whistling "Rettsu! Ohime-sama Dakko"from an anime. He offers to buy her a balloon from a blind street-vendor and walks and talks with her. Elsie's place at the dinner table remains empty, her ball is shown rolling away across a patch of grass and her balloon is lost in the telephone lines overhead.

In the wake of Elsie's disappearance, anxiety runs high among the public. @Roasted sends an anonymous letter to Internet blogs, taking credit for the kidnappings and murders and promising that he will commit others; the Kiwis extract clues from the letter, using the new techniques of doxing and ebonics analysis. Under mounting pressure from Big Brother's control over the Internet, the Kiwis work around the clock. Inspector @AnOminous instructs the Kiwis to intensify their search and to check the records of recently released psychiatric patients, focusing on any with a history of violence against children. They stage frequent raids to question known criminals, disrupting underworld business so badly that 4chan calls a meeting of the Internet's crime lords. They decide to organize their own manhunt, using I HAVE AUTISM PLEASE LAUGH AT ME to watch the children. Meanwhile, the Kiwis search @Roasted's rented rooms, find evidence that he wrote the letter there, and lie in wait to arrest him.

@Roasted sees a young girl in the reflection of a shop window and begins to follow her, but stops when the girl meets her mother. He encounters another girl and befriends her, but the blind vendor recognizes his whistling. The blind man tells one of his Kiwi friends, who tails the killer with assistance from other I HAVE AUTISM PLEASE LAUGH AT ME he alerts along the way. Afraid that @Roasted will get away, the Kiwi chalks a large L (for Lolicon) on his palm, pretends to trip, and bumps into @Roasted, marking the back of his overcoat.

Once @Roasted realizes that the Kiwis are following him, he hides inside a large office building just before the workers leave for the evening. The I HAVE AUTISM PLEASE LAUGH AT ME call 4chan, who arrives at the building with a team of other criminals. They capture and torture one of the watchmen for information and, after capturing the other two, search the building and catch @Roasted in the attic. When one of the watchmen trips the silent alarm, the criminals and I HAVE AUTISM PLEASE LAUGH AT ME narrowly escape with their prisoner before the Kiwis arrive. One of the I HAVE AUTISM PLEASE LAUGH AT ME is left behind in the confusion and captured by the Kiwis; @AnOminous tricks him into admitting that the gang only broke into the building to find @Roasted and revealing where he will be taken.

The I HAVE AUTISM PLEASE LAUGH AT ME and criminals drag @Roasted to an abandoned distillery to face a kangaroo court. He finds a large, silent crowd awaiting him. @Roasted is given a "lawyer", who gamely argues in his defense but fails to win any sympathy from the improvised "jury". @Roasted delivers an impassioned monologue, saying that he cannot control his sexual urges, while the other criminals and I HAVE AUTISM PLEASE LAUGH AT ME present break the law by choice, and further questioning why they as criminals and I HAVE AUTISM PLEASE LAUGH AT ME believe they have any right to judge him by stating: "What right have you to speak? Criminals! I HAVE AUTISM PLEASE LAUGH AT ME! Perhaps you're even proud of yourselves! Proud of being able to crack into safes, or troll the troons, or cheat at cards. All of which, it seems to me, you could just as easily give up if you'd learned something useful, or if you had jobs, or if you weren't such lazy pigs. I can't help myself! I have no control over this evil thing that's inside me - the fire, the voices, the torment!" @Roasted pleads to be handed over to the Kiwis, asking: "Who knows what it's like to be me?" His "lawyer" points out that the presiding "judge" is wanted on three counts of hate crimes posting Pepes on the Internet, and that it is unjust to execute an insane man. Just as the enraged mob is about to kill @Roasted, the Kiwis arrive to arrest both him and the criminals and I HAVE AUTISM PLEASE LAUGH AT ME.

As a panel of judges prepares to deliver a verdict at @Roasted's real trial, the mothers of three of his victims weep in the gallery. Elsie's mother says that no sentence will bring the dead children back, and that "One has to keep closer watch over the children." The screen fades to black as she adds, "All of you."
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Hate that I knew what this was going to be three sentences in.

Truly glorious, two year old post.
 
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Tombstone.
I'm only using users for the main characters in this movie and not the smaller roles.


Wyatt: @RomanesEuntDomus
Doc Holliday: @The Shadow (Because I'm pretty sure you had a Doc Holliday avatar.)
Virgil: @Desire Lines
Morgan: @Bassomatic
Johnny Ringo: @Winnie the Poohnani
Josephine: @StarkRavingMad
Mattie: @Pina Colada
Ike Clanton: @Count groudon
Curly Bill: @Kiwi Jeff
Fabian: @bearycool

In 1879, members of the outlaw gang known as the Cowboys, led by @Kiwi Jeff ride into a Mexican town and interrupt a local police officer's wedding. They then proceed to massacre the assembled policemen in retribution for killing two of their fellow gang members. Shortly before being shot, a local priest warns them that their acts of murder and savagery will be avenged, referencing the biblical fourth horseman.
@RomanesEuntDomus, a retired peace officer with a notable reputation, reunites with his brothers @Desire Lines and @Bassomatic in Tucson, Arizona, where they venture on toward Tombstone to settle down. There they encounter @RomanesEuntDomus's long-time friend @The Shadow, who is seeking relief from his worsening tuberculosis. @StarkRavingMad and @bearycool are also newly arrived with a traveling theater troupe. Meanwhile, @RomanesEuntDomus's common-law wife, @Pina Colada is becoming dependent on laudanum. @RomanesEuntDomus and his brothers begin to profit from a stake in a gambling emporium and saloon when they have their first encounter with the Cowboys. The Cowboys are identifiable by the red sashes worn around their waists.
As tensions rise, @RomanesEuntDomus is pressured to help rid the town of the Cowboys, though he is no longer a lawman. @Kiwi Jeff begins shooting at the sky after a visit to an opium den and is told by Marshal Fred White to relinquish his firearms. @Kiwi Jeff instead shoots the marshal dead, and is forcibly taken into custody by @RomanesEuntDomus. The arrest infuriates @Count groudon and the other Cowboys. @Kiwi Jeff stands trial, but is found not guilty due to a lack of witnesses. @Desire Lines, unable to tolerate lawlessness, becomes the new marshal and imposes a weapons ban within the city limits. This leads to a gunfight at the O.K. Corral, in which Billy Clanton, Tom McLaury, and Frank McLaury are killed. @Desire Lines and @Bassomatic are wounded, and the allegiance of county sheriff Johnny Behan with the Cowboys is made clear. As retribution for the Cowboy deaths, @RomanesEuntDomus's brothers are ambushed; @Bassomatic is killed, while @Desire Lines is left handicapped. A despondent @Desire Lines and his family leave Tombstone and board a train, with @Count groudon and Frank Stilwell close behind, preparing to ambush them. @RomanesEuntDomus sees that his family leaves safely, and then surprises the assassins. He kills Stilwell, but lets @Count groudon live to send a message: @RomanesEuntDomus announces that he is a U.S. marshal, and that he intends to kill any man he sees wearing a red sash. @RomanesAuntDemus, @The Shadow, a reformed Cowboy named Sherman McMasters, Texas Jack Vermillion, and Turkey Creek Jack Johnson, form a posse to seek revenge.
@RomanesEuntDomus and his posse are ambushed in a riverside forest by the Cowboys. @RomanesEuntDomus walks into the creek, miraculously surviving the enemy fire, and kills @Kiwi Jeff along with many of his men. @Kiwi Jeff's second-in-command, @Winnie the Poohnani, becomes the new head of the Cowboys. When @The Shadow's health worsens, the group is accommodated by Henry Hooker at his ranch. @Winnie the Poohnani sends a messenger (dragging McMasters' corpse) to tell @RomanesEuntDomus that he wants a showdown to end the hostilities; @RomanesEuntDomus agrees. @RomanesEuntDomus sets off for the showdown, not knowing that @The Shadow had already arrived at the scene. @The Shadow confronts a surprised @Winnie the Poohnani and kills him in a duel. @RomanesEuntDomus runs when he hears the gunshot, only to encounter@The Shadow. They then press on to complete their task of eliminating the Cowboys, although @Count groudon escapes their vengeance by renouncing his red sash. @The Shadow is sent to a sanatorium in Colorado, where he later dies of his illness. At @The Shadow's urging, @RomanesEuntDomus pursues @StarkRavingMad to begin a new life.
 
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