Jacob Stuart Harrison Storytelling Thread - FSTDT Forums Ex-Pet Lolcow

[MW 590]

OK man, keep in mind, this is all very silly and there's no weird conspiracy. This scenario where the janitor discovered the art thief stealing priceless masterpieces from the library and was murdered/kidnapped is beyond ridiculous and obviously didn't happen. You do realize this right?

You're still having fun with this right? You're seeming a little paranoid here...

My dad thinks that the police officer who looked under the cushions was looking for drugs. So it could be that they think that a student has been using drugs. I wonder if this could be connected to the janitor. What if the police suspect that the janitor gave a student drugs and so the janitor fled to avoid getting caught. When heading home from the campus, I saw a helicopter in the sky. Perhaps that is the police searching for him or the student who took the drugs.

 

[Corbin Dallas Multipass]

My dad thinks that the police officer who looked under the cushions was looking for drugs. So it could be that they think that a student has been using drugs. I wonder if this could be connected to the janitor. What if the police suspect that the janitor gave a student drugs and so the janitor fled to avoid getting caught. When heading home from the campus, I saw a helicopter in the sky. Perhaps that is the police searching for him or the student who took the drugs.

Hahaha, you are sheltered dude. They're looking for a person who took drugs with a helicopter? How exactly will they identify him from above?

Yeah, hate to break it to you buddy, but like 75% of the student body is using drugs there. Like everywhere else. Why would someone randomly hide drugs around the school, instead of at their home, their car, whatever?

 

[MW 590]

Hahaha, you are sheltered dude. They're looking for a person who took drugs with a helicopter? How exactly will they identify him from above?

Yeah, hate to break it to you buddy, but like 75% of the student body is using drugs there. Like everywhere else. Why would someone randomly hide drugs around the school, instead of at their home, their car, whatever?

Helicopters have been used many times when searching for a criminal on the run. If they see someone that looks like they are running away from something, they will be able to swoop down, get off the helicopter, and see if it is the suspect.

The person could have accidentally left the drugs in the school causing the police officer to investigate other places where drugs could have been left.

 

[Corbin Dallas Multipass]

Helicopters have been used many times when searching for a criminal on the run. If they see someone that looks like they are running away from something, they will be able to swoop down, get off the helicopter, and see if it is the suspect.

The person could have accidentally left the drugs in the school causing the police officer to investigate other places where drugs could have been left.

It's a school, man. When you saw the helicopter, you yourself were "Fleeing the scene" because people leave. And they don't bring in helicopters to look for a dude with a bag of weed. I mean.... there's the outside possibility the janitor had like a pound of heroin in his office or something, but I very highly doubt it.

 

[MW 590]

It's a school, man. When you saw the helicopter, you yourself were "Fleeing the scene" because people leave. And they don't bring in helicopters to look for a dude with a bag of weed. I mean.... there's the outside possibility the janitor had like a pound of heroin in his office or something, but I very highly doubt it.

Well there is a heroin epidemic in the state of Massachusetts so that is a good hypothesis.

 

[Corbin Dallas Multipass]

Well there is a heroin epidemic in the state of Massachusetts so that is a good hypothesis.

No.... no it really isn't. There is a heroin epidemic, but that doesn't mean janitors are foolishly hoarding huge amounts of it at their place of employment. It could be a drug dealing thing, I suppose, but typically those don't play out as helicopter chases, certainly not for the buyer, and you wouldn't be looking for a pound of heroin under a seat cushion.

I'll be interested in finding out what boring normal thing actually happened, but I'll hold out hope that it is something wild and crazy.

 

[Syaoran Li]

@Jacob Harrison

Of all historical figures, why do you want to emulate a relatively obscure English monarch? That's like being a hardcore fan of Rescue Rangers in 2019, it's just strange, obscure, and downright absurd.

If you want to restore the legacy of a dead failed European political figure, might I suggest Benito Mussolini?

Yes, Mussolini was an autistic blowhard and a massive lolcow on nearly every level. But he had ambition and was actually kind of entertaining and could work a crowd better than the best performers in the entire WWE (and I'm including the talent of WCW and ECW in this as well).

Honestly, had Mussolini not sided with Hitler, he could have pulled a Franco and kept his regime going strong because the Western Allies considered him a joke.

Also, look at what you have to work with. England is a failed lolcow country on a failed lolcow continent and forms a Holy Trinity of Failure along with their fellow SJW nanny-states Germany and Sweden. And unlike the latter two, England further fucked themselves over with Brexit, severely damaging their economy and possibly inciting a resurgence of the IRA.

Meanwhile, Italy may also be a lolcow country but they're slowly getting their shit together and are probably the least cucked of the European countries alongside Hungary and Poland.

Also, Italian politics are a lot more crazy and less stuck-up than British politics.

The people are far more receptive to populism by comparison. Yeah. there was Brexit, but that is nothing compared to the living meme of Silvio Berlusconi, who is The Simpsons to Donald Trump's Family Guy.

Everything Trump is doing, Berlusconi did it first, did it better, and did it for far longer....

You could outdo Mussolini and Berlusconi if you tried hard enough

 

[MW 590]

@Jacob Harrison

Of all historical figures, why do you want to emulate a relatively obscure English monarch? That's like being a hardcore fan of Rescue Rangers in 2019, it's just strange, obscure, and downright absurd.

If you want to restore the legacy of a dead failed European political figure, might I suggest Benito Mussolini?

Yes, Mussolini was an autistic blowhard and a massive lolcow on nearly every level. But he had ambition and was actually kind of entertaining and could work a crowd better than the best performers in the entire WWE (and I'm including the talent of WCW and ECW in this as well).

Honestly, had Mussolini not sided with Hitler, he could have pulled a Franco and kept his regime going strong because the Western Allies considered him a joke.

Also, look at what you have to work with. England is a failed lolcow country on a failed lolcow continent and forms a Holy Trinity of Failure along with their fellow SJW nanny-states Germany and Sweden. And unlike the latter two, England further fucked themselves over with Brexit, severely damaging their economy and possibly inciting a resurgence of the IRA.

Meanwhile, Italy may also be a lolcow country but they're slowly getting their shit together and are probably the least cucked of the European countries alongside Hungary and Poland.

Also, Italian politics are a lot more crazy and less stuck-up than British politics.

The people are far more receptive to populism by comparison. Yeah. there was Brexit, but that is nothing compared to the living meme of Silvio Berlusconi, who is The Simpsons to Donald Trump's Family Guy.

Everything Trump is doing, Berlusconi did it first, did it better, and did it for far longer....

You could outdo Mussolini and Berlusconi if you tried hard enough

Because Richard II was England’s last legitimate king and I have English ancestry which makes me more concerned about England than Italy.

As I said earlier, England was very great in the Middle Ages and can be made great again when the heir is put on the throne. And Brexit is a good thing because it is making England leave the institution responsible for the c failed nanny states of Germany and Sweden. The problem is that Theresa May is a sellout who made a traitorous deal with the European Union that prevented a full Brexit.

 

[Syaoran Li]

Because Richard II was England’s last legitimate king and I have English ancestry which makes me more concerned about England than Italy.

As I said earlier, England was very great in the Middle Ages and can be made great again when the heir is put on the throne. And Brexit is a good thing because it is making England leave the institution responsible for the c failed nanny states of Germany and Sweden. The problem is that Theresa May is a sellout who made a traitorous deal with the European Union that prevented a full Brexit.

Are you high or just plain stupid?

Seriously, put down these aspirations for royalty and get some real help

 

[MW 590]

No.... no it really isn't. There is a heroin epidemic, but that doesn't mean janitors are foolishly hoarding huge amounts of it at their place of employment. It could be a drug dealing thing, I suppose, but typically those don't play out as helicopter chases, certainly not for the buyer, and you wouldn't be looking for a pound of heroin under a seat cushion.

I'll be interested in finding out what boring normal thing actually happened, but I'll hold out hope that it is something wild and crazy.

Well another crazy thing happened today, and I am beginning to wonder if aliens are behind this and the janitor’s disappearance. How do you explain this? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7wMOeDirsEQ&feature=youtu.be

Well another crazy thing happened today, and I am beginning to wonder if aliens are behind this and the janitor’s disappearance. How do you explain this? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7wMOeDirsEQ&feature=youtu.be

Corbin Dallas Multipass has not been active since Thursday. I am starting to worry that something has happened to him and that it is related to the crazy events that have been happening recently.

 

[Randall Fragg]

Corbin Dallas Multipass has not been active since Thursday. I am starting to worry that something has happened to him and that it is related to the crazy events that have been happening recently.

The aliens got him dude. They’re trying to stop you from becoming England’s True and Honest monarch because you’d ruin their plans on infiltrating and subverting the human race. The current fake and gay royal family are all lizard people.

 

[MW 590]

Another mysterious thing has been happening today. When I was shown evidence against Catholicism that made me become agnostic, I started to masturbate and cum twice a day when thinking about women's asses in jeans due to not fearing being eternally damned for it. However today, when trying to masturbate, I haven't had enough sexual sensation to masturbate effectively. What if Catholicism is true and God is making me asexual to punish me for my apostasy and gravely disordered acts of having sexual pleasure outside of "the sexual relationship which is demanded by the moral order and in which the total meaning of mutual self-giving and human procreation in the context of true love is achieved."

Check out new content I added to my site. https://jacob-harrison.fandom.com/wiki/Intergalactic_Network

@Corbin Dallas Multipass Today I solved one of the mysteries. I was walking in those same woods and saw those 2 animals again. They are deer.

@Corbin Dallas Multipass Another mysterious thing happened at college today. The elevator door opened and nobody was there. Is it a sign from God telling me to convert back to Catholicism? The same elevator door opening with nobody there happened before in Fall 2018. Is this somehow related to the janitor's disappearance? Perhaps he was working late at night and something scared him so much that he left his job.

 

[Absolute Brainlet]

@Corbin Dallas Multipass Another mysterious thing happened at college today. The elevator door opened and nobody was there. Is it a sign from God telling me to convert back to Catholicism? The same elevator door opening with nobody there happened before in Fall 2018. Is this somehow related to the janitor's disappearance? Perhaps he was working late at night and something scared him so much that he left his job.

No, you're just retarded. There is no secret conspiracy, this isn't a sign from anyone, you are just looking too deep into simple coincidences.

 

[MW 590]

No, you're just exceptional. There is no secret conspiracy, this isn't a sign from anyone, you are just looking too deep into simple coincidences.

But what is the scientific explanation for the elevator door opening if no one was in the elevator?

 

[Absolute Brainlet]

But what is the scientific explanation for the elevator door opening if no one was in the elevator?

An electrical error or some shit. I don't understand how those things actually work, I'm not an electrician.
But it sure as shit isn't something supernatural.

 

[AF 802]

But what is the scientific explanation for the elevator door opening if no one was in the elevator?

Janitors sending the elevator down so they can vacuum the other one?

 

[AnOminous]

But what is the scientific explanation for the elevator door opening if no one was in the elevator?

Some fucking retard hit all the buttons and then got out.

Get help, loon.

 

[Corbin Dallas Multipass]

OK Jacob, I really don't feel comfortable playing along anymore. I feel like I'm only contributing to your delusions. Heh, I see you noticed my absence, but alas, it wasn't anything exciting, I was just working out of the office away from internet connections.

You say you are seeing a counselor and being medicated. Good. But have you talked to them about this stuff? You're really displaying strong signs of schizophrenia, and the earlier you deal with it the better. The connection to religion is a common one with schizophrenia as well. But at the very least I can allay your concerns about myself, I have not been disappeared by shadowy government types.

Sorry man, I wish you the best, and I hope you lead a happy life and hopefully get in touch with reality a little more.

 

[Fashy Airship]

Hi I am Jacob Harrison. I am a 19 year old sophomore in college. I came here because I was banned from Fundies Say The Darnedest Things, Fstdt Forums, and their subreddit.

I have a strong attachment to England. The reasons are because I have English Ancestry, America is culturally an Anglo Saxon nation, and because my dad has a British Sports car(a TR6).

Because of that, I want to restore the rightful heir to the throne of England. Elizabeth is not the rightful Queen. Here is why.

In 1483, Edward IV died. His 12 year old son Edward V became the King but since he was too young to rule, Edward IV’s brother Richard Duke of Gloucester became Lord Protector of the Realm. Then Richard was informed by Bishop Robert Stillington that Edward IV had a previous marriage with Eleanor Butler before marrying Elizabeth Woodville and Eleanor was still alive when he married Elizabeth making his marriage with her an invalid bigamous marriage. That meant that all of their children including Edward V were illegitimate.

Because of that, Richard seized the throne as Richard III. Unfortunetely, he was killed in the Battle of Bosworth Field in 1485 and the usurper Henry VII seized the throne. He was the heir to the Lancastrian claim to the throne and to secure his claim, he married Elizabeth of York, the eldest daughter of Edward IV and Elizabeth Woodville to merge the Houses of Lancaster and York.

However Elizabeth of York was illegitimate due to her parents invalid marriage which means that the royal line ever since 1485 has been an illegitimate line. Richard III was England’s last true King.

The rightful heirs to the English throne are therefore, the descendants of Edward IV’s and Richard III’s eldest sister Anne of York. The current heir is Filmer Courtenay William Honywood.

He is also the heir to the Lordship of Ireland and the Kingdom of France(due to English claims to the French throne dating back to the 1300s).

So my plan is to join an existing society called the Richard III Society and hopefully they will find smoking gun evidence of Edward IV’s previous marriage which will cause public outrage because the English will realize that they have been paying taxes to support a royal family that has no right to the throne.

Therefore many people will join my cause including many in the Richard III Society and we will train future child heirs of the House of Honywood on how to rule and my society will also secretly infiltrate the governments of the UK, Ireland, and France and pass laws making the true heir the King of a united Europan Kingdom. Scotland will become a vassal kingdom with the heir to the House of Balliol put on Scotland’s throne. The monarch will be trained to rule not just reign and bring great prosperity to the Kingdom.

Since I am Roman Catholic, under the true monarchy, the Church of England will rejoin the Catholic Church.

Since Constantinople and the Holy Land of Israel are rightful Christian land, my society also needs to infiltrate the governments of Turkey and Israel. The Crusader Kingdom of Jerusalem will be reestablished as a vassal Kingdom and the Muslims and Jews will live under the rule of the Europan Kingdom.

So does anyone here want to join my cause?

Well I like your style, ballsy and big-thinking. I too agree with you about good king Richard III and his exiled heirs being done out of their rightful place.

Have you considered contacting the Ricardian Society? They are very big proponents and supporters of his reign.

I recall a story a few years ago about an Aussie guy who is a living heir to Richard III but he said he had no interest in contesting the throne.

 

[MW 590]

Well I like your style, ballsy and big-thinking. I too agree with you about good king Richard III and his exiled heirs being done out of their rightful place.

Have you considered contacting the Ricardian Society? They are very big proponents and supporters of his reign.

I recall a story a few years ago about an Aussie guy who is a living heir to Richard III but he said he had no interest in contesting the throne.

I originally thought that Richard III was the rightful king when I made this post, however, I did further research on the succession system of Richard II before he was overthrown by Henry of Bolingbroke. These previous comments show my further research on the matter.

Well restoring the true heir will be major change, because the true King will rule, not just reign like the modern monarchy because the monarchy at the time of Richard II had far greater power than they do now.

And I found the rightful King. After doing research, I found that Richard II intended for his Edmund of Langley to be the next in line. This is due to the fact that he did not want his cousin Henry of Bolingbroke to inherit the throne because Henry was once part of the Lords Appellant, a rebel group of nobles. It was an attainder. Richard’s system of succession was therefore a revision of Edward III’s entail which barred women from inheriting the throne, Richard’s revision also barring Henry from the throne.


So following agnatic primogeniture except when the direct male line dies out, the rightful heir to England’s throne is Louis Alphonse Duke of Anjou. He is also considered by some monarchists to be the rightful heir to the French throne but I am aware of the Peace of Utrecht where his ancestor, Phillip V of Spain renounced for himself and his descendants any right to the French throne.


Future descendants of Louis Alphonse should therefore be groomed to be future kings.

I discovered very recently that there was a statute in 1351 that restricted inheritance to those born in liegance of the sovereign or are naturalized. Prince Edward, the ancestor of Louis Alphonse was born in Portugal which means that Louis Alphonse is not the rightful king after all. The closest English male relative to Richard II who was not excluded from the throne was John Holland(1395-1447) as the son of John of Gaunt's daughter Elizabeth Duchess of Exeter. I am therefore now tracing his descendants.

My mom who is a preschool teacher experienced something today at school. One of her students got frightened in the hallway, saying that he saw Slender Man, a Creepypasta character. Interestingly, in 2014, 12 year old girls stabbed their friend claiming that Slender Man told them to do it.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Slender_Man_stabbing

It is therefore not far fetched to think that after the Creepypasta story of Slender Man was written, a demon decided to take the form of Slender Man and convinced those girls to stab their friend and then showed up at the school my mother works at. Things like this make me wonder if I should convert back to Catholicism.