Lolcow KingCobraJFS / Josh Saunders - Amateur musician, YouTube Streamer, wandmaker, and self-proclaimed "sexy goth badboy". Perpetually circling the drain.

[The Southwest Strangla]

I think they call it "soft firing" where they cut your hours down to basically nothing waiting for you to quit.

I remember people crying over the fact he doesn't have a job. ffs he couldn't even fill up the tea coolers right. he couldn't mop. he said in the past that after he mopped the floors, someone would come and mop it again. he can't really do anything right. I always believed wendy's just wanted to get rid of him, but didn't want to look like shit from firing a special needs gothic bad boy.

 

[AnOminous]

The illegal hooch making, the drunken benders, the lack of empathy towards animals, his own visible deteriorating health and hygiene and refusal to adress, his lack of understanding of cooking basics, him not being in control of his own finances and utilities, ...

There's nothing illegal about making wine or beer or "mead" at home. Generally (and in Wyoming) it's 100 gallons a year for personal or family use.

 

[DickSuckem]

Josh could survive for quite a long time, I'd be more curious about a homeless saga, the human body can take wild amounts of punishments. If you're curious look around at your local homeless population, 40's, 50's 60's, often polyaddicts who've abused themselves as hard or harder then josh, the duster is easily the most dangerous thing he's doing though. He could drop dead at any moment, but I wouldn't be surprised if he made it into his 50's or 60's, at least a 50/50 chance.

I'd be very interested to see how he reacted if he got evicted again, likely the only thing to push him to do anything different, Josh is soft and doesn't have any experience sleeping rough or having to interact with other mentally ill degens that is the shelter system, which I assume is well beyond capacity if it's anything like most other small to medium size cities right now. I'm sure Clint would bail him out at least once or twice more to save himself the long term headache and too keep josh away from the do-over family, but he absolutely isn't going to let Cobes live with him again, and rightfully so. But if he ended up homeless Josh would implode, but given he's technologically retarded, it would likely result in an even worse content drought, but I am curious, beside broadcasting his downfall and having paypigs he isn't that wildly different from tens of thousands of other people who end up homeless every year. I do feel like it's only a matter of time until he does something dumb enough to get evicted again.

His teeth are weird as fuck to me to, they've hung on better then your average meth head, look at gothie, bitch had her front chompers gone earlier then josh. My only guess is that they actually had some dental intervention and had that shit pulled when it was clear they were beyond repair or caused enough pain, and josh is just sexy gothic rockstaring his way through the pain and obvious need to go to a dentist and face the muisc.

I guess this is why Josh is so facinating, he really is an engima of retardation, but he is basically a documentary on how your average panhandler ends up on that street corner, albiet with more comedy and a better support system.

 

[Steve Harwell's ghost]

Agree with you for sure on that. Clint seeing his teeth in that condition and not making a dentist appointment or urging him to go is irresponsible. Realistically though Clint probably did bring up a dentist though.

The thing about abscess's is they smell, really bad. So bad that anyone around you can smell it. The boy may have left all his human senses behind, but there is no way everyone around him at the recent tard day out couldn't smell it. As another kiwi said it could literally kill him without warning. Clint is a failure in every sense and this ends that debate. He could bribe the boy into going to the dentist as was suggested above, or play in his whole persona, " Ozzy goes to the doctor, all rock stars do bud", hell anyone that really cares and is left in his life could fix at least this. Clint has gotten his to the doc several times once during the covid nonsense.
TMI: Got a bad filling, pain was so bad I blacked out several times while waiting to get in. When I finally got in the dentist, It made the whole room smell like death the minute they started pulling it. Truly gross shit.

 

[Gay Baby Jailer]

If it were easy CWC would have been placed under conservatorship a decade ago after Bob died.

I think we both know barb is way too lazy to do any of that.
Clint would also never want to do anything like that, its totally against his style. Clint isn't exactly lazy, and I should clarify that my main issue with him is his parenting style, not necessarily his lack of trying. It's like people who overfeed their dogs. Could the dog have a worse life? Sure. But that doesn't mean it should be obese. It might be better to say that Clint is intellectually lazy, and has been stuck in the same methods that didn't work 15 years ago.

 

['Ole Dente]

What do you guys think was the moment where Josh's life became irredeemable?

I wouldn’t say he’s irredeemable he’s just a tard, but the moment things slid downhill can be identified easily.

There was a point where he’d supplement his income begrudgingly with his government retard check and it was a point of pride that he was able to pay his bills with his own money that he earned. He didn’t have money or time to sit around and get blasted all day, he had a schedule and bills to pay, he was actually pretty proud of the work he did and he was invested in wherever he worked in a really enthusiastic, team player kind of way. All of that changed when he started Cobra Craft Wands at the behest of a handful of his paypigs, he quit his job and started carving up sticks. He had no schedule, no need to be sober, his bills were all paid and whatever money he made could be spent on booze immediately. He lost contact with most of the outside world because no situation warranted him interacting with people and keeping a firm understanding of social boundaries. It basically removed the safety blocks on his life keeping him from doing whatever he wanted and acting like a mentally handicapped dipshit all day.

 

[Sicko Hunter]

He could bribe the boy into going to the dentist as was suggested above, or play in his whole persona, " Ozzy goes to the doctor, all rock stars do bud", hell anyone that really cares and is left in his life could fix at least this. Clint has gotten his to the doc several times once during the covid nonsense.

Clint bribing Cobes with booze wouldn't work. He has a dozen paypigs that already are giving him money and sending him booze without him even having to leave his house. Clint saying "I'll buy you a bottle of jack if you go to the dentist" would do nothing. As for the "Ozzy goes to the dentist bud!" he's not that dumb. He's not an actual child like that.

 

[AnOminous]

As for the "Ozzy goes to the dentist bud!" he's not that dumb. He's not an actual child like that.

Yes he is. Anyone who wasn't a complete and utter child would have already gone to the dentist. His ODD-like childish refusal to take care of himself isn't because he's stupid, but he's also stupid.

 

[Hennimore]

That stream earlier, holy shit. That's the most pouty and visibly upset I've seen him in awhile. Can't remember the last time he rage quit stream like that. It's hilarious how transparent he is, you can just tell within five seconds of opening the stream if he is in one of those moods or not.
He just had alcohol too because he was posting those videos of him drinking Jack drink combos, boy finished off that little baby bottle of whisky real quick and it hasn't even been a full day since he did, those mood swings are hitting him quick now.

 

[Negev]

I wouldn’t say he’s irredeemable he’s just a tard, but the moment things slid downhill can be identified easily.

There was a point where he’d supplement his income begrudgingly with his government retard check and it was a point of pride that he was able to pay his bills with his own money that he earned. He didn’t have money or time to sit around and get blasted all day, he had a schedule and bills to pay, he was actually pretty proud of the work he did and he was invested in wherever he worked in a really enthusiastic, team player kind of way. All of that changed when he started Cobra Craft Wands at the behest of a handful of his paypigs, he quit his job and started carving up sticks. He had no schedule, no need to be sober, his bills were all paid and whatever money he made could be spent on booze immediately. He lost contact with most of the outside world because no situation warranted him interacting with people and keeping a firm understanding of social boundaries. It basically removed the safety blocks on his life keeping him from doing whatever he wanted and acting like a mentally handicapped dipshit all day.

I would add that I think the spray-paint he was using inside started killing brain cells before the duster and serious alcohol abuse, I wonder how much spray-paint he has breathed in over the years.

That stream earlier, holy shit. That's the most pouty and visibly upset I've seen him in awhile. Can't remember the last time he rage quit stream like that. It's hilarious how transparent he is, you can just tell within five seconds of opening the stream if he is in one of those moods or not.
He just had alcohol too because he was posting those videos of him drinking Jack drink combos, boy finished off that little baby bottle of whisky real quick and it hasn't even been a full day since he did, those mood swings are hitting him quick now.

He probably checked his bank balance after the videos and got mad, he always sits a particular way when its going to be a beg stream, leaning forward and just waiting for superchats. I don't understand how anyone watches stuff like that he barely even talks.

 

['Ole Dente]

Clint bribing Cobes with booze wouldn't work. He has a dozen paypigs that already are giving him money and sending him booze without him even having to leave his house. Clint saying "I'll buy you a bottle of jack if you go to the dentist" would do nothing. As for the "Ozzy goes to the dentist bud!" he's not that dumb. He's not an actual child like that.

Yeah that’s the subreddit fantasy lore that you can just manipulate this guy easily because he’s a big dumb baby. From what Ive seen he is probably hands down the hardest cow to wrangle.

Just making contact is a very difficult task but assuming you do, you have to incentivize him with money/promises of fame. You could have a whole conversation going over very specific details for hours and he’ll completely forget the whole conversation and who you are entirely in 6 hours, it’s a combination of his brain being completely bombed out and him not giving a fuck about anything you have to say anyway. Assuming you can get him to do what you want which has required constantly reminding him who you are and what’s going on, he’s again so bombed out and lazy that he’ll fuck up any plan you have by half-assing things and having very specific, stupid ways of doing things that he’s dead set on.

This is why wranglers always come and go because he’s basically troll proof, you can’t intimate these long con trolling schemes because he’s dumb, lazy and completely aware of his situation. He’s already been fucked with for over a decade all of this low hanging fruit, low effort discord homo bullshit has already been tried a million times. He’s not stupid, he knows what you’re doing.

 

[AnOminous]

He’s already been fucked with for over a decade all of this low hanging fruit, low effort discord homo bullshit has already been tried a million times. He’s not stupid, he knows what you’re doing.

Not really, he's very stupid. He just assumes anyone is trolling. While that's mostly right, he also does shit like smash completely well intentioned gifts. But then he'll huff duster.

 

[Incel Death Note]

Boy is getting fucking FAT and quick. I can't wait for the fat cobra arc. Maybe it will add some much needed levity, the show is getting way too dark.

those mood swings are hitting him quick now.

When alcoholics reach their 30s the hangovers start hitting different and you really get anxious, depressed, easily enraged for at least an entire day after a bender. I think this will be the crossroads for Cobes, whether he can actually manage to cut down his drinking (lol), or whether he switches from "drinks too much but not quite a lost cause" to fullblown have-to-get-my-ascites-drained alcoholic.

 

['Ole Dente]

I think this will be the crossroads for Cobes, whether he can actually manage to cut down his drinking (lol), or whether he switches from "drinks too much but not quite a lost cause" to fullblown have-to-get-my-ascites-drained alcoholic.

the only way he will ever stop drinking is when the paypig money dries up completely

 

[AnOminous]

Boy is getting fucking FAT and quick. I can't wait for the fat cobra arc.

Is this from chugging repulsive "mead" all the time? Considering the weird shit he adds to that stuff, the worst of it must have thousands of calories a bottle.

 

[Incel Death Note]

Is this from chugging repulsive "mead" all the time? Considering the weird shit he adds to that stuff, the worst of it must have thousands of calories a bottle.

He drank that chocolate eggnog mead which was something like 6000 calories.

 

[BallBuster II]

the only way he will ever stop drinking is when the paypig money dries up completely

Considering that recent stream was under an hour and he made more in Superchats/tips than DSP makes on multiple days (without some faggot whale), I think it is safe to say that isn't happening anytime soon.

In 20 minutes, he made roughly $178. I know Youtube will get a cut, but it's still wild that he does nothing and makes more than Phil. I will get a final count of the entire stream in a few minutes.

Edit 2: In a 54 minute stream of pretty much no real content, Cobes pulled in on Superchats alone roughly $409, that isn't including any direct Cashapp donations he got that I wasn't tracking. Even with the I think 30% Youtube cut, that is still around $287 in 54 minutes.

 

[Healthy Boy Brand]

Boy is getting fucking FAT and quick. I can't wait for the fat cobra arc. Maybe it will add some much needed levity, the show is getting way too dark.
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Getting Torrente vibes from the new look.

 

[Exit fullscreen button]

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IDK if anyone's made this comparison before; clock me up if necessary, but
Cobes legit looks like these niggas from Elden Ring.

 

[Phalanges Mycologist]

There's nothing illegal about making wine or beer or "mead" at home. Generally (and in Wyoming) it's 100 gallons a year for personal or family use.

I looked it up and that seems to be about the same everywhere in the western world, with the exception of NZ where you can distill your own spirits legally - changes wildly all over when you do have to pay tax or register as brewer though i.e. you can only consume it on your property, only imediate family can drink it, you can gift it, you can't gift it etc but I've not seen anything about anyone getting punished for it other than distillation (aka moon shining).

Josh could survive for quite a long time, I'd be more curious about a homeless saga, the human body can take wild amounts of punishments. If you're curious look around at your local homeless population, 40's, 50's 60's, often polyaddicts who've abused themselves as hard or harder then josh, the duster is easily the most dangerous thing he's doing though. He could drop dead at any moment, but I wouldn't be surprised if he made it into his 50's or 60's, at least a 50/50 chance.

The thing is Josh has only ever had a somewhat comfortable existence, always had some form of creature comforts, and also wouldn't start off reasonably healthy or knowing how to survive He'd last a short period of time homeless but he wouldn't last long.

That honestly makes me curious about how Clint has things set up for if / when he dies, Tannis does seem to care for Josh but she's not actively caring for him other than dropping off shopping every now and then and his sisters I doubt would take up Clints mantle as Boglim Wrangler.

His teeth are weird as fuck to me to, they've hung on better then your average meth head, look at gothie, bitch had her front chompers gone earlier then josh. My only guess is that they actually had some dental intervention and had that shit pulled when it was clear they were beyond repair or caused enough pain, and josh is just sexy gothic rockstaring his way through the pain and obvious need to go to a dentist and face the muisc.

I honestly wonder about that myself, I've often wondered if he had naturally really good teeth and it's just took 15 years of abuse to get them to the point they are finally giving out - I know he's had dental pain for a long while and some form of infection but it's taken a long time for them to break.

Yes he is. Anyone who wasn't a complete and utter child would have already gone to the dentist. His ODD-like childish refusal to take care of himself isn't because he's stupid, but he's also stupid.

The way he is wired with that ODD is very curious, I know ODD can be managed through therapy and also by parents by how they manage to get compliance they normally get it by making the kid think it's there idea or planting it as a suggestion and building from there but Clint seemed to not get that - and used things he wanted him to do as a punishment so Baths, Haircuts, etc became a negative in Josh's mind and he never developed it as a habbit, if anything he learned to avoid them as a habbit because of the way Clint handled it.